


Guardians

by SpencerRemyLvr



Series: The Healers Guild [1]
Category: Criminal Minds, X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Accidental Bonding, Assassins' Guild, Healing Powers, Legends, M/M, Mean Rogue, Other Guild, Soul Bond, Supernatural Elements, Thieves Guild, badly written Cajun accent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-21
Updated: 2014-07-21
Packaged: 2018-02-09 19:00:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 155,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1994220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpencerRemyLvr/pseuds/SpencerRemyLvr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two men who have never met before suddenly find their lives and souls bound together by unbreakable ties. What is it that's bound them and what's going to happen to their lives now? SLASH Spencer/Remy</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cr8zymommy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cr8zymommy/gifts).



> A few quick AN’s here. One, the town in here, Rigors, is made up. Two, the big one here. Okay, so, I was talking with cr8zymommy and she told me that she’d started to write a story for me before she got sick. She had two chapters done and some general outlines. It involves Spencer/Remy, of course, and it has a healing touch as a power for Spencer in it, though not right away. It is also what she loosely labels ‘supernatural’. There’s a ‘bond’ in here that’s slightly reminiscent of the Sentinel/Guide bond in “The Sentinel” fanfiction. So, on top of my usual disclaimer that I don’t own Marvel, Criminal Minds, or anything connected to the two, just to cover my bases I’ll say I don’t own Petfly or The Sentinel either.

“Okay, everyone, it looks like you’re all heading to a nice little out of the way city of Rigors, Connecticut.” Remote in hand, Penelope made her way around the round table, pressing a button to bring up photos of twelve different faces on the screen; seven were male, five were female. “Locals there have definitely found a case they either can’t handle, or don’t really care to handle. Right now it’s looking to be about fifty-fifty.”

“Don’t care to handle?” Emily asked with surprise. “Why exactly don’t they care?”

Penelope took her seat and crossed her legs, sighing a little. “And that, my dear, is the first step into the minefield of this case. Apparently Connecticut has made it known in some ways that they’re not that tolerant of people who are different. Namely, mutants. Someone there doesn’t seem to like that and they’re taking people, both mutant and non-mutant alike, and holding them for three days before killing them to show their ‘protest’.”

When Penelope trailed off, Aaron picked up the slack. “The Unsub is making it blatantly clear that neither human nor mutant is safe. There’s no pattern to which one he takes. The only requirement is that, when he takes a mutant, they either have something visible to show them as one, or they’re left in a way that shows them as one.”

“Death is a great equalizer. He’s showing them that, in the end, humans and mutants are all the same.” Derek said. He flipped over the information on his tablet, looking at the pictures there. “It looks like he’s quite extensive in what he does.”

“Is he using the torture to make a point or for his own enjoyment, though?” Ashley asked.

Spencer flipped a page on the file in his hands, not even looking up as he answered her. “From the increase in torture with each victim, I would say he started out torturing solely to prove that humans and mutants all feel the same. Somewhere along the way, he discovered his enjoyment of. Now the torture is just as important to him as anything else, if not more so.”

“The local police chief wanted our help ages ago.” Penelope told them. “But he couldn’t get the backing for it because people didn’t seem to care about the mutants dying. It was once the body count for the human portion went up that they agreed to get help.”

Aaron set his tablet down and looked at the victim photos on the big screen. “We need to get out there and stop him before anyone else has to die.” That said, Aaron rose to his feet. “Grab your bags. Wheels up in thirty.”

CXCX

The flight to Connecticut seemed to drag on for Spencer. The team discussed the case as they always did during the flight. They tried to figure out anything that they could about the man they were hunting. It was agreed that he wasn’t just some mission based killer, despite what he seemed to be wanting to display. The hatred that he showed for his victims was too strong for someone simply on a mission. And the hatred was evident, not only in their kidnapping and murder, but in the torture he inflicted over the three days that he held them. The things he did to them had Spencer's stomach clenching tight. But more than that, Spencer found himself scared as he looked down at the papers in his hand. Because there was one thing about Spencer that no one at the Bureau except for those on his team knew about—Spencer Reid was a mutant.

When he had first been approached by Gideon to join the FBI, the man had come already armed with the knowledge of Spencer's mutation. How, Spencer still didn’t know, as he kept it a secret from almost everyone. Yet Gideon had known. Spencer could still remember their conversation as they’d stood in a secluded part of the parking lot at Caltech. Gideon had given him that look he was famous for, the one that made a person feel as if he could see right through them, and he said “What would you do if I told you I could get you into the Bureau? I’ve been watching you, Dr. Reid. I’ve seen the interest you have. If I told you I could get you in, get you past the medical examinations, without anyone ever discovering you’re a mutant…if I told you I could do all that, what would you say to me?”

He had answered “What do I need to do?” and that had started his career at the FBI. Never once had Spencer looked back. And though he had gone through some hard times, he could say now that he wouldn’t change that decision if he could. All of the good he had done with this job was important to him. Sure, there were things he had done, things that had been done to him, that he wished had never happened. Things he wished he could forget. But he had done plenty that he was proud of as well.

Never once in his career had he been so tempted to tell his boss that he wanted to sit a case out. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to do it for so many different reasons. One—he wanted to help these people. He wanted to stop this monster. Two—he would _not_ let fear rule his life. And three—it wasn’t as if he were truly in any more danger than normal with this job. Just because the man was killing humans and mutants didn’t mean that Spencer was automatically more at risk. The Unsub hunted mutants with visible mutations, and Spencer's mutation wasn’t visible. He was an empath; a strong empath. One who also had the ability to sense the energy in the world around him. Sometimes he felt as if he could reach out and touch that energy, draw it to him even, but he had always held himself back from him. Always he had pushed that thought away. He was already enough of a freak, no need to make it worse.

No, asking to me taken off was not an option. It was cowardly and if there was one thing that Spencer wasn’t, it was a coward. What he needed was to get himself together. There was no reason for him to worry. The Unsub was hunting mutants that were visibly a mutant, not secretly mutant federal agents. Plus, it wasn’t like his team was really going to even let him out of their sight while on this case. Already he could see the protectiveness in the way that Derek was sitting semi close, without crowding him, and the way that Aaron, Dave and Emily all kept glancing his direction as if to check on him. The only person that didn’t do any of that was Ashley and that was because she was too new on the team for Spencer to tell her his secret. He didn’t know her well enough to trust her yet. But the rest of the team knew and they would look out for him. Even though he didn’t fit the victimology, they would watch out for him, just in case. Maybe if he just kept reminding himself of that, he might make it through this okay.

Lost in his thoughts, Spencer didn’t think about how quiet he’d been through not only the second half of the plane right, but also on the car ride to the station. Not until Derek caught him on their way from the SUV’s and toward the station. He hung back a little, snagging Spencer's arm. “Hey, Reid. Are you okay, man?” He asked him in a low voice.

Spencer tried to put on his most reassuring smile at the same time that he cursed himself for not hiding it better. He knew how protective Derek was. It was bad enough that the man was already starting to get protective because of this; if he realized just how irrationally worried Spencer was, his protectiveness would get even wore. “I’m fine, Morgan.”

The other man’s eyes flashed toward the group walking just a bit in front of him and back over to Spencer. “You know everything’s gonna be fine, right? This guy, you don’t fit perfectly in his victimology. And even if you did, we aren’t gonna let anything happen to you.”

“I know.”

Slipping his hand up, Derek gave Spencer's shoulder a squeeze. “Just remember that I’m here if you need to talk, okay? And all of us would understand if you felt you needed to sit this one out or take some time off.”

Right there was an easy out for Spencer to step back from this case and not have to worry. Yet something about Derek’s offer only made it seem that much more important that he stay. Though he gave the man a smile of appreciation, he reiterated “I’m fine. But thank you.”

There was no time for Derek to press the issue. The two had to hurry up to catch up with the others so that they came into the station all at the same time. The chief met them in the station bullpen, shaking Aaron’s hand when he reached him. “Agent Hotchner? Thanks for coming, folks. I’m Chief Maurer. I really appreciate you coming out.”

“Of course.” Aaron reassured him. “This is my team. Agents Rossi, Morgan, Prentiss, Seaver, and Dr. Reid. Is there a room that we can set up in? We’d like to get right to work.”

As always, Aaron smoothly got them started. Dave and Ashley were sent down to the coroners while Derek and Emily went to the most recent dump site. That left Spencer working the geographical profile while Aaron was trying to run through victimology. So far, there seemed to be nothing that they all shared in common. “So how is it that he picks them?” Aaron murmured at the board. “There has to be something he does, something he sees, that makes him choose them. We just need to figure out what that something is.”

CXCX

The BAU wasn’t the only team that was hunting down this Unsub on the outskirts of Rigor, Connecticut. There was another team that was hunting them as well. Only, this team was slightly different. They weren’t BAU. They weren’t even police officers. In fact, by most law enforcement officials, they’d be considered terrorists. Remy LeBeau and Logan sat parked in a car down the street from the house of the man they were hunting, hidden by some trees; the man the BAU was on their way to see. They had been tracking the man for quite a while now, ever since they’d been sent for recon when the information crossed Scott’s desk. Their leader had told them “Go out there and see what you can figure out. If the whispers we hear from there are true, the guy’s a mutant. That makes him our problem. See if it’s true and if you can find him and then call in and we’ll send a team out to you. If it turns out it’s a false lead, come back home.”

They’d both been chosen to go for different reasons. Logan, very obviously for his tracking abilities and Remy because there was no one better to gather information from people. The Cajun could navigate city streets and track through people and information just as easily as Logan could travel the woods and track by sight or hearing or smell. That made them the perfect team, no matter where this man traveled to. It also helped that the two had often worked together and they made a good team.

It had only taken two days for them to track the guy down to this residence. They’d called in, just like they were supposed to, and Scott had a team on the way out there. It was just a matter of watching and waiting, something neither one was very fond of. Remy had his seat slightly reclined and his long legs kicked up, feet hanging out the window. A cigarette sat in one hand, currently dangling out the window. In the other hand he walked a quarter back and forth over his knuckles. Logan was smoking as well, his cigar creating a slightly thicker smoke. Logan looked as if his eyes weren’t going anywhere in particular while Remy’s eyes were hidden behind shades, almost giving him the appearance of being asleep. However, both men had their eyes locked firmly on the house ahead of them.

“ _Merde_.” Remy drawled the curse out just as lazily as he was doing everything else at the moment. He brought his cigarette up and pulled in a long drag, exhaling slowly. “By de time dey get here, we all gon’ be old and gray.”

Logan snorted and slanted a quick look over to his friend. “Dramatic much, Gumbo?”

Humor quirked the corner of Remy’s mouth. “Y’ just now figuring dat out, _mon ami_?” He knew Logan well enough to recognize the look on his face as one of amusement, though others might’ve seen it and the headshake and thought that the Wolverine was annoyed. Remy knew better. He’d spent enough time with his friend and seen him in all sorts of moods that it was easy for him to identify what Logan was feeling just by looking at his face. Though he could always reach out with his ‘charm’ and sense what the man felt, he avoided doing that. It wasn’t as pleasant as someone might think to feel someone else’s emotions. And there was always a risk of feeling _too much_. Better to just use the skills he’d learned over the years and read a person’s face or body language. Those could tell you plenty enough about someone’s mood, if you knew how to look.

The car had fallen silent once more and Remy contemplated breaking it somehow when someone up ahead caught his attention. It only took a second to place and then he and Logan were letting out curses at almost the same time. The Feds were here. “ _Merde_! What de hell we gon’ do now? Dey gon’ get demselves killed in dere!” Remy spat out. He’d sat up straight in his seat, his lounge position completely gone. He watched as the agents parked and quickly moved from their cars, local police right behind them.

Logan was already grinding his cigar out in the ashtray and reaching for his door handle. “We’re gonna save their asses, that’s what.” With no more than that, he was climbing out the door.

With another stream of curses, Remy climbed out of the truck as well, hurrying to follow his friend. “Oh, dat’s all, eh?” He grumbled to himself. “Just gon’ go right on into dis house where de _FBI_ and police are tryin’ to arrest someone and just offer our help. Yeah, dat’s gon’ go over well, dat. Gon’ get our asses shot, dat’s what we’re gon’ do.” Still, despite his grumbles, he stuck close behind Logan as they ran through the trees towards the property.

They were just getting close to the house when someone took off towards the trees, followed by another group of people. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that their guy was racing for the forest and the agents were hot on his tail. Remy and Logan shifted direction and headed after them. Something tugged at Remy’s mind, something strange, but he pushed it back as they heard a loud shout up ahead, followed by a gunshot. There was a brief pause and then more shouting, a little clearer this time. “FBI! Drop the weapon!”

Logan and Remy both slowed as they got closer. Rushing into a situation full of guns wasn’t the smart plan here. They moved stealthily now, watching as the clearing came into view, showing them the scene playing out there. By silent agreement they decided to watch before acting. Rushing out there could get either one of them shot, and while Logan would heal quickly from something like that, Remy wouldn’t. But that strange sensation was pushing its way forward in Remy’s mind once more, distracting him from what was going on. There was this sensation of danger that he could at least explain slightly, considering their situation, though it was stronger than it should’ve been. But there was something else tugging at him. This…protectiveness. A need to defend. It was almost like what he felt sometimes when in a fight with his Stormy at his side. There was always that need to protect her. This was like that, just—stronger. It was no longer nagging at him, but demanding, making itself known. Only, who did he need to protect?

From his position by a tree, Remy scanned those in front of him. The man they were hunting, Jason Ulner, was standing with his back by some trees off to the right, his gun pointed towards the young woman he held in his arms. To the left were five FBI agents and more police officers were coming up behind them. All of them had their guns out. One of them, a serious looking man in a suit, was talking, trying to talk Jason down. The girl in Jason’s arms was sobbing, looking absolutely terrified.

Was it her that he felt this urge for? Of course he wanted to help her. But what about her would make this urge so strong? It took everything Remy had not to move out into the clearing and take this man down with a few well-placed cards, even knowing that it would likely get him shot.

Then suddenly someone else stepped forward from the group and Remy’s full attention snapped straight to him. The man was scrawny and he looked young, yet he dressed more like a professor than an FBI agent. Black slacks, converse shoes, a grey shirt and a tie with a black sweater over it all that was just visible underneath his bulletproof vest. Shaggy brown hair blew towards his face only to be ignored. Remy couldn’t help but stare at him. Then he saw the young man hold his hands up on either side, making a show of putting his weapon away, and that protective part of Remy snarled furiously at the loss of weapon while the rest of the Cajun went into shock. Him? _This_ was the guy triggering this instinct? This FBI agent?

Remy didn’t have time to think on it. Hell, he didn’t seem to have the ability to think of anything but the young agent trying to talk to the psycho with the gun. He was moving towards him slightly, hands held out and empty at his sides, drawing the man’s attention to him. Remy extended his senses, reaching out to Jason to try and gauge his feelings, and that was the only thing that gave him any kind of warning. The girl tried to jerk away and the agent moved and suddenly Jason’s fury peaked. The gun in his hand shifted to point towards the agent and Remy knew what was going to happen.

Remy didn’t stop to think about the vest or how it would save the man from a shot. He didn’t think about the countless others around them that would fire on the man. He didn’t even think of Logan standing beside him, hissing something his direction. Remy reacted off of an instinct he hadn’t even known was there, yet couldn’t deny. Without conscious thought he was moving, a charged card flying from his hand to blow in the air above Jason’s head. It startled the man enough that he dropped the girl, who went racing towards Logan, who was now emerging from the trees as well. Remy threw another card right at Jason’s feet, intending to knock him back. But his attack had drawn Jason’s attention and no sooner had his card left than the man not only struck out with his mind, but he fired his gun.

If it hadn’t been for the mental attack, Remy’s reflexes would’ve saved him from the gunshot. But the sharp stab at his mind, weak as it was, was just enough of a distraction that he moved a hair too slow. Agony sliced through his side, a hot flame tearing through his body, sending him down to his knees.

Somewhere in the background, Remy heard crashes and growls and shouts. All of it sounded kind of muffled, though. Like he was hearing it through water. Arms came around him and he felt them moving him. Abruptly he was being laid out on the ground and there was someone above him, leaning over him, and he realized that the arms that held him belonged to the agent he’d been watching. The one he’d been unable to stop himself from protecting.

The guy was pulling off his vest and then the sweater he wore. He pressed the sweater against Remy’s side and pain flared white hot and bright. At his groan of pain, the guy started to speak, his voice pitched to be as soothing as possible. “I know, I know. I’m sorry, but I need to put pressure on it to stop the bleeding until the ambulance can get here.” Brown eyes locked onto his and Remy was gripped by the look there. So much concern from someone who didn’t even know him. “We’re going to get you help. Don’t you worry. Help is on the way.”

It seemed so strange to think that he’d lived through so many things, had survived horrors that would’ve destroyed lesser people, and he was going to be brought down by a bullet taken while protecting a scrawny FBI agent he’d never even met before. Of all ways he’d thought he would finally die, this hadn’t been one of them.

Something reached out through Remy’s pain, something warm, almost hot. It called to him; to a place deep inside. That same part of him that had come to life when he saw this agent in danger now reached out to that heat. Remy had no idea what was going on or what any of this was. He wasn’t questioning anything. That heat beckoned to him and he ached with everything inside of him to answer the call. That place in him and that heat pushed to one another and there was a brief pause before they touched; a calm in the storm. Then the two touched and everything in Remy exploded in a flash of heat and light and sound. It was as if he were being filled with sunshine; liquid sunshine. It poured into him, racing through his veins, running through the passages of his mind, filling places he hadn’t known were empty. It was sheer agony—it was absolute Heaven! It flared so bright he was blinded by it. He _was_ the light.

A guttural cry echoed around them. Whether it came from him or from the man above him, he didn’t know. The light grew brighter and stronger until, with one final burst, he could take no more. The light was replaced with the darkness and Remy slid down into unconsciousness, not even noticing the body that slumped down over him.


	2. Chapter 2

Spencer woke to the sounds of an argument over his head. He woke slowly, in stages. The first thing that came to him was sound. Voices speaking over him in low, furious tones. What they were saying, he wasn’t sure. He only caught the tone. Next came sensation, to his mind and his body. He felt the clothes against his skin, the semi hard bed underneath him, and the warmth of a hand against his. His mind picked up on the anger in the air around him as well as the worry and confusion and countless other things. It was instinct more than anything else that had him tightening his mental shields until those extra emotions were cut off.

The voices above him became a little bit clearer. Spencer finally caught the words that were being said. “…don’t even know who you are!” That was Derek’s voice, low and furious with a hint of worry to it. “For all we know, your friend there is the one that caused this.”

“Yeah, right.” This voice was deeper, more of a growl, and it had very obvious frustration in it. “Cause that makes perfect sense. He knocked your guy out and then knocked himself out as well, leaving himself at the mercy of the Feds and police all around. Right. That makes total sense there, bub. I can see how you became an agent.” Sarcasm dripped off the words.

It was with those words that the rest of reality returned for the young FBI agent. He remembered everything. Going to the Unsub’s house, chasing him down into the woods, trying to talk him down and seeing that it wasn’t going to work. Then this strange man racing out of the trees, throwing explosions at the Unsub, drawing his attention and getting himself shot. Finally, dropping down to help him since it was obvious no one else was going to go anywhere near an obvious mutant. Only, as he’d knelt there, something strange inside of him had pushed up. This odd sensation unlike anything he’d felt. That sensation had reached out just like his empathy and he’d felt an answering touch from the man and then…then the light. Everything had been fire and heat, racing in his veins and in his mind, burning him and yet—healing him. He’d felt like the fire was ripping him apart and making him whole once more. Then, nothing. Darkness.

The hand around his tightened abruptly. Seconds later, a voice was by his ear, so much softer than the others that were still arguing. “Well look who decided to wake up. _Bonjour_ dere, _homme._ Bout time y’ joined de land of de living again.”

The strange voice had Spencer's eyes jerking open. A few blinks to battle against the bright light and then he found himself looking into the face of the man from the forest. Red and black eyes looked overtop a pair of sunglasses and right at his face. There was only a vague sense of shock in him at the sight of those stunning eyes. Inexplicably, Spencer felt himself relax more than anything else. He didn’t answer right away, his brain still processing things rather slowly.

A squeeze to his hand drew his attention once more. The man was looking at him sympathetically, as if he understood exactly what was going on. “It’s okay, y’ just take a second. Remy was de same way when he woke up. It’ll start to even out in a minute, don’t y’ worry.”

In an absent sort of way Spencer took stock of the fact that this man apparently spoke in the third person. The man—Remy, it would seem—was watching him cautiously. Spencer licked lips that had gone dry and he found himself saying the first thing that came to his mind. “What happened?”

“ _Je ne sais pas_.” Remy replied with a half-shrug. “Was kinda hoping y’ knew.”

With his free hand, Spencer reached up to rub at his head. “I don’t know.” It slipped past his lips before he could stop it and he couldn’t help but think how weak it sounded. But it was the honest truth. He had no idea what just happened. What was going on here? What had that, that _light_ been? He felt…different inside. His mind felt different. It felt—more. He knew that made absolutely no sense and yet it was the only way he could think of to describe it. Like there was more to his mind than there had been before. Like parts of it that he hadn’t even known existed were now wide open. He reached into his mind to feel at those new places, the places where he felt that ‘more’ sensation, and he felt his body jerk with surprise when he came across something. In his mind there was a bundle, a little knot of emotions and sensations, and he knew without being told that this little ‘bundle’ belonged to the Cajun sitting beside his bed. He knew that as surely as he knew his own name. But, _how_?

Spencer studied that bundle and felt his shock grow. Whatever the hell had happened had built a link between them such as he had never seen anywhere before. He could feel it, feel how it was wired through every inch of him. They were tied together. He could sense so much because of it. Like the worry that Remy was feeling right now, and the bright and warm feeling of protectiveness that Spencer had felt in friends before, only in Remy it seemed to be multiplied a hundredfold. No, a thousandfold. There was a hint of pain too that Spencer could feel. The longer he looked at that pain, the clearer it became, until he swore that he knew, he _knew_ , it was a headache. Remy’s head hurt.

Something came to Spencer and he jerked his eyes open once more. His eyes shot down towards Remy’s stomach. The Cajun easily figured out what he was thinking and he gave his hand another squeeze. “Whatever happened between us…it healed Remy.” He explained. There was a hint of wonder in his voice, colored just a bit by worry. “De wound’s gone.”

Their conversation had finally drawn the attention of the rest of the room and Spencer found his bed swiftly converged upon. Derek and Emily were both there, as well as some strange man that Spencer didn’t know, but recognized from the forest. He’d come racing out only seconds after Remy had. They must’ve been there together.

“Reid!” Derek’s voice held a wealth of relief to it. “Man, it’s good to see you awake. How you feeling?”

“Fine.” It was the instinctual response, yet Spencer realized that it was true. He honestly felt fine. Different? Yes. Changed? Yes. But hurt? Injured in any way? No, not at all. In fact, he felt physically healthier than he had in a while. Even the ache he’d had in his leg from where he’d crashed into his coffee table was no longer there. “I feel fine.”

Derek reached out as if he would take Spencer's other hand and Spencer instinctively flinched back a little, knowing his shields weren’t their strongest at the moment. Touching someone when his shields felt this way was always a risk. He could draw in way, way too much from a person, or it could cause his shields to fall away completely and that could result in quite a lot of pain for Spencer. Sometimes it could even knock him out with the force of it.

Not even seconds after he flinched, the whole room was stunned by the low growl that seemed to come from the other side of Spencer's bed. It took the young genius a second to realize that the sound came from Remy. It was low, a very obvious warning with just a hint of a threat to it. All eyes turned toward him. The Cajun didn’t flinch under their stares. It was hard to tell with his sunglasses on, but Spencer was almost positive that Remy was glaring at Derek, watching the hand that still hovered near Spencer's bedside. His body language was clearly displaying just as much warning and threat as the growl had, with the promise to unleash it at a moment’s notice.

Spencer didn’t even really think about his reaction. He did the only thing that seemed right and he reached his free hand over to curl over his and Remy’s joined hands. He didn’t even stop to think about the fact that he’d pulled away from Derek because his shields were low and he didn’t want to pick up on too much emotion, yet he was now holding on to one of Remy’s hands with both of his. Soothingly, he rubbed their joined hands and he looked right at Remy’s face. Something in him told him that he had to get Remy calm, _now_ , or this could get very dangerous very fast. It took nothing at all for Spencer to project a sense of calm and reassurance to the man beside him. At the same time, he lowered his voice and murmured to him, using his training as a profiler to try and gauge what was going on and talk him down from it. “Remy, look at me. Listen to me. Everything is okay, do you hear me? There is no threat here. This is Derek Morgan, my friend. He wasn’t going to hurt me.”

Little by little the tension started to fade from Remy’s body. Those around the bed watched with shock and amazement as Spencer stroked their hands and kept up his steady murmur, talking Remy down from whatever anger he had. Derek had drawn his hand back and was watching them, unsure what he should be doing. There was his best friend, his little brother, touching and talking with some guy that Derek had never met before. Some stranger that had just happened to show up while they were trying to talk down an Unsub. Nothing was making sense! Derek knew he’d seen the guy be shot. He’d seen Spencer kneeling with the guy, staunching the blood with his sweater. The next time he’d turned back to them it had been in just enough time to hear the both of them give a cry and then Spencer had slumped over him. The sight of it had been terrifying. He had no idea what had happened to these two!

He’d ridden with Spencer in the ambulance, watching as the young agent stayed unconscious through the ride and through being settled here at the hospital. He hadn’t woken for any of the tests the doctors had done—tests that had found nothing wrong with him. Emily and Derek had stayed with Spencer this whole time, keeping watch over him, worrying. Dave, Aaron and Ashley had gone to the station to wrap things up there.

Once Spencer had finally been settled in here, these two had come bursting into the room, one looking almost as if he were chasing the other. The big guy, who’d actually bothered to introduce himself and say that his name was Logan, and the scrawnier one, who hadn’t spoken to any of them and had simply gone straight to Spencer's bedside like he was drawn there. Like something was tugging them together. They’d been arguing about their presence when Spencer had finally woken. Derek had no idea who the hell these two really were but he was going to get to the bottom of this.

He looked up now and saw that Remy seemed settled and Spencer was relaxing back into the bed again and he couldn’t stop himself from asking “What’s going on here, Reid?” He waited for wide brown eyes to lift towards him before continuing. “Do you know this guy? Who is he? And what happened back there?”

Spencer looked at his best friend and he knew he couldn’t just brush off his questions. “I don’t know him. I’ve never met him before today.” He said the words slowly. “As for what happened…I’m not sure. I don’t really know what happened there. I don’t know what that was. But, we touched and…there was heat and light.”

“Like being filled by de sun.” Remy supplied. “Not outside, but inside.”

“Exactly. Liquid sunshine raced inside of my veins.” He trailed off, unsure of what to say or how to even say it. None of this made any sense.

It was obvious that Spencer either didn’t want to finish things, or didn’t know if he should. Remy took the choice out of his hands. He knew there was no way they would be able to hide this. Especially not if they wanted any kind of help to see if it was permanent or reversible, or help in understanding just how deep and strong the ties were. “We linked.” He told the room. “Don’t know how, _mais_ we linked. It’s strong, too. Could feel him from de minute Remy woke up.”

“This aint the place to be trying to find answers.” Logan spoke up suddenly in that deep, serious voice of his, cutting off anything else that might’ve been said. His eyes drifted over Remy and Spencer. “Why don’t we find out when they’ll cut you two loose and then we can head to one of our hotels and talk where it’s more private? I don’t think we need someone walking in for this talk.”

It was a logical plan. In that moment, Spencer needed that kind of logic. He latched onto it with obvious relief. “I can leave now.” He said quickly. “Whatever happened, it didn’t just heal Remy. It worked on the both of us. I feel better than I did when I woke up this morning.”

Derek looked like he was going to protest, but Emily put a hand on his arm and shook her head, speaking up for the first time. “It’s a good plan, Morgan. Why don’t you get Reid checked out and I’ll call Hotch and have them meet us over at the hotel.” She turned her head to look at Logan and Remy. “We’re staying at the Travelodge.” It was one of two hotels in the small town.

“Sounds like a plan. I’ll call our boss as well and we’ll meet you guys over there.” Logan agreed.

That was enough for Spencer. He pulled his hands back from Remy far more reluctantly than he wanted to admit to, even to himself. Then he turned himself and slid his legs out of the bed. He was grateful no one had tried to put him in a gown; he was still in his own clothes. That was one plus from all of this. Deliberately he ignored the feeling in his head that told him to move back to the bed, back close to the man still sitting on the other side of it. He didn’t know if it was his own want or if he was picking up on Remy’s wants through this link. Either way, he didn’t care. He was _not_ the touchy, clingy type and he wasn’t going to start now with this, this person he didn’t know! Maybe the time spent checking out and heading to the hotel, away from Remy, would help him to gain some perspective. Without looking back at the Cajun, Spencer made himself say “We can meet in mine and Morgan’s room—number 42. We’ll see you guys there.” And then he nodded at Derek and his friend took the hint, heading out of the room with him.

As he moved further away, Spencer pushed away the sensations that built inside of him. He ignored the feeling of loss and he fought back the urge to race back into the room. Instead, he lifted his chin and continued down the hall, showing nothing of what he felt inside on the outside.

Back in the room, Remy and Logan watched as Emily slipped out to join her friends, leaving the two of them alone. Remy’s hands curled into fists in his lap. He didn’t know what was going on and he didn’t like not knowing things. It was the unknown things that could come up and bite you in the ass. Whatever was going on here, it wasn’t something he’d ever dealt with before and he had no idea what to do. Inside of him he felt this urge to get up and race after the young agent. That protectiveness was burning brighter than ever and it was raging at him for letting the man out of his sight. How could he protect him if he wasn’t with him? But the man in Remy was still there and he pushed logic over this strange new need. Surely the man could survive a short trip to a hotel all on his own. He’d survived life thus far without Remy in it.

In a rare show of nerves, Remy ran a hand through his hair and let out a soft sigh. He felt Logan’s hand settle on his shoulder and he reached up to pat the man’s hand, letting him know he appreciated the gesture as much as he appreciated Logan not pushing anything right now.

After a moment to collect himself, the young Cajun pushed back his unease at being separated from Spencer and he focused on the now. Time to call in to Scott and then time to go and figure out just what the hell was going on here.

CXCX

Everything moved rather quickly to get the two groups to the hotel. Spencer knew that he was a little out of it on the way over. He didn’t really pay attention to the world around him, didn’t interact with his friends. He simply sat in his seat with all of his attention turned inwards. The further away from the hospital they got—the further away from Remy he got—the more he seemed to draw into his mind and the more anxious he felt. Emily and Derek both noticed it and they felt their concern grow. When they arrived at the hotel, Spencer looked as if he was moving on autopilot, just following after them as Derek unlocked the door and let them in.

The logical part of Spencer's brain told him that this was a problem, something that he needed to think about and work out a solution to. A puzzle. If he could just think clearly about it, then he could maybe figure out a solution. Only, logic wasn’t seeming to work for him. Just the thought of figuring out a way to break this was enough to have Spencer cringing and pulling in on himself. It was like a physical hurt, the idea of breaking this link. He wrapped his arms around his waist without realizing it and instinctively reached out to the bond, soothing himself with the reassurance that it was still there, that he could still feel Remy in his head. He turned his head and looked off towards the wall—towards Remy. He didn’t know how he knew, only that he did. _Who are you?_ He wanted to ask. _Why are you so important to me? What did this link do to us? I don’t even know you. The thought of breaking the link with you shouldn’t make me feel so threatened._

“Reid?”

The soft word snapped Spencer out of his circling thoughts. His head whipped around. The look on his face had his friends wanting to cringe. There was a wide-eyed sort of fear that they didn’t like to see there. There was no real time for them to comment on it. Just that instant, a knock sounded on the door, and Emily moved to let in Aaron, Dave and…crap. Ashley. The sight of her made Spencer wince again. Ashley was here? Did she _have_ to be here? Couldn’t she have been sent to her room or something like that? Even as Spencer thought the question, he had the answer. No, they couldn’t just send her off to her room. She’d seen what everyone else had, she’d seen Spencer go to the hospital, and if they all met in his room and left her out, she’d have way too many questions. It was more dangerous to keep her out of the loop than to let her in.

Everyone was looking at Spencer from the instant they came in. Their gazes only served to make him more uncomfortable and nervous. In them, he could see countless questions and plenty of emotions. Those emotions battered against his shields. Feeling it had Spencer backing immediately away from them. Sometimes distance helped. As he did, he closed his eyes briefly and inspected his shields. They were back to their normal strength; so why were their emotions hitting him so hard? Why did it feel like his shields were, at most, only half there? He swore they were close to knocking back down. But how could that be? Unless…unless whatever that light was, whatever else it had done to him—could it have strengthened his empathy? At any other time he would’ve dismissed the idea as ridiculous. Yet there was no denying what he was feeling. His empathy was stronger. Because of that, his usual shields weren’t strong enough. But how was that possible? How had that happened? Was it because of that light? Or had that light triggered a power increase that he would’ve had on his own anyways? And how was that connected to the healing between them. Because something in Spencer said that the healing was connected, not just a byproduct of whatever they’d done. It felt tied to his empathy somehow. But he wasn’t a ‘healer’. He’d never had the ability to heal! There were just so many damn questions.

The others watched on in silent concern. Anything that had been being said was cut off as they all watched Spencer back himself almost into the corner. The young genius kept his arms around himself and they could see his fingers working rhythmically against his sides. His eyebrows were furrowed in a look they all knew meant thought but the rest of his body language screamed out something else to the ones in the room that knew to look. Everyone but Ashley knew the signs of Spencer's walls being low; they’d learned to adapt to it over the years. When he was like this they had to be extremely careful not to touch him and to make sure that they kept him in a steady, stable environment. There was always a chance of there being just one too many emotions and his walls giving way completely. It had only happened twice on the job in the entire time he’d been at the BAU. Once, after Georgia, in the hospital. Then again, after that undercover stint with Emily in that cult. The pain, the death, it had just been too much and he’d practically melted into the backseat of one of the SUV’s, barely coherent. Both times, his team had been there to help him through.

Other than those moments, he had kept his empathy pretty much under control. The little things that his friends did to help him keep that control had become so ingrained that they didn’t even think about doing them anymore. Half the time they didn’t notice that they did it. Like how they would shift their stance to make sure that, when introduced to a group, they kept Spencer back just enough that he didn’t have to shake someone’s hand and could get away with simply waving at them. Or how they would bring him things like tea or coffee when he looked a little frayed, giving him something hot in his hands to focus on. He’d told them once that the heat from the cup could act as a grounding agent. Or the brief touches when they saw he needed it, always laced with some positive and warm emotion to help him stay steady and strong.

But Ashley didn’t know any of these things about Spencer. She didn’t know what it was that had caused him to look the way he did right then and she couldn’t help her concern. “Reid…are you okay?” Her voice was soft in the quiet of the hotel room. “You look like you should still be back at the hospital.”

How should he answer this? Looking at her, Spencer knew he should explain some things before the others arrived. She should understand some things first; it was only fair. He’d been watching her for a while, feeling out her response to mutants to try and gauge how she might feel about them, and nothing he’d found so far suggested that she had any problems with them. She seemed more than just tolerant. That meant that he probably wouldn’t have to deal with disgust, thankfully. But could he trust her to keep this a secret? _There’s no real choice right now. She’ll most likely find out when the others arrive, because this can’t be discussed accurately without bringing my empathy into it. Better to let her get her reaction out now._ “I’m fine. I just…My shields aren’t as strong as they need to be.”

“Your shields?”

He looked to his friends and saw the support on their faces, the strength that he had always found with them, and he used it to finish this. “I’m an empath.”

Everyone was carefully watching Ashley to try and gauge her reaction. They were prepared for just about anything. Spencer was watching her emotions. He felt her shock as clearly as he saw it, followed by a sense of realization and understanding, as if this had confirmed something for her. Steady, clear eyes lifted to his and in that look, Spencer knew he was safe. She wasn’t judging him, she wasn’t afraid or upset. She looked completely understanding. “That makes a few things about you make sense, Dr. Reid. You’ve always reminded me slightly of a friend of mine at the Bureau.”

A friend at the Bureau? Cocking his head, Spencer took a chance, asking “Dr. Bailey?” The woman was the Bureau physician that Spencer saw, the one that Gideon had hooked him up with to help him make sure he passed the medical exams to get into the Bureau without them finding out his secret. She was also a low level telepath.

Ashley smiled slightly at him. “Yes. One of my friends had a friend that came to the academy with him, and Dr. Bailey’s her mom. When her shields are low, she does some of the things I’ve seen you do.” She paused briefly before adding “I’ve never told on her and I won’t on you. Your secret’s safe with me. But I take it your empathy has something to do with whatever happened tonight?”

That question brought the eyes in the room back to Spencer. He rubbed one hand over his arm in an absent, self-soothing sort of gesture. “I don’t know.” He answered honestly. “Maybe. There is always that chance. It certainly had an effect on it.” Abruptly he cut off. The sensation of Remy in Spencer's head, which had steadily been growing stronger, now pulled at him. He lifted his gaze when he felt it and turned to look at the wall once more, as if he could see right through it. Everyone in the room took note of how the tension in Spencer's body seemed to ease as he spoke his next words. “They’re here.”

The hotel room grew quiet as they all listened. There was the sound of a car pulling in and being turned off, followed by four doors shutting. _Four doors means at least four people are here. If they’re all like Remy, all mutants, then this could become very dangerous, very fast_ Spencer noted to himself. He saw the others were thinking the same thing. All of them shifted so that their guns were easily accessible, making Spencer realize that everyone in the room was armed. He felt the shift in the air that always came when the agents went into ‘cop mode’. There was an actual shift in emotions when they did it. Anything extra was sort of locked away to be replaced by a steadiness and focus that Spencer had only ever found in law enforcement and military personnel.

When a knock came at the door, it was Emily who answered it, keeping to the side so that the others in the room would have a clear shot if needed. The first person to come in was Logan, his eyes scanning the whole room with one sweep. Right behind him came a taller, thinner man with brown hair and rose colored glasses. Next was a beautiful woman with flame colored hair. Then, last of all, Remy came in.

The door to the room was shut once everyone was inside. Then, in another surprise for the night, Aaron looked at the guy with the sunglasses and said “Hello, Scott.”

“Hello, Agent Hotchner.” Scott said with a polite nod. He didn’t give anyone time to ask the questions that were so obvious on their faces. “Agent Hotchner and I have known one another for quite a few years. He’s helped the family out a time or two.”

Just vaguely was Spencer aware of the words being exchanged. He heard as Scott introduced his companion as his wife, Jean. Then Aaron was introducing the people of the room. All of that was just on the edge of Spencer's senses. The rest of him was focused on one thing and one thing only. Mind and body, he focused on the only man that it felt like mattered.

Remy’s head turned right to Spencer and the young agent knew, even with the sunglasses, that Remy was staring right at him. A knot of tension inside Spencer that he hadn’t even realized was there started to ease at the sight of the Cajun. He wanted nothing more than to reach out to him, to hold hands as they had in the hospital. He wanted the comfort and peace that had come from the skin to skin contact. But touch was not Spencer's way. The need to reach out and touch people had been forced out of him a long time ago and it was a lesson he’d never forgotten. It had him keeping his arms around himself now instead of reaching out. But he couldn’t stop himself from opening up to that knot of emotions in his head, that presence of Remy, and basking in the sensations there. This close, they were so strong, so comforting.

He swore he could feel Remy’s gaze raking over him and there was concern and protectiveness sharp and hot in this link of theirs, this bond. The Cajun took a step towards him and Spencer didn’t back away. “Y’r hurt.”

The headache from his low shields pulsed behind his eyes and in his temples. “I’m fine.” How many times was he going to say that tonight? Spencer felt the others eyes on him and he repeated his words to them as well. “I’m fine. We should focus on the problem at hand.”

“Why don’t you two tell us what exactly happened?” Scott asked them.

Spencer looked towards Remy and the other man gave a soft nod in reassurance, as if to say he’d handle this. Then he started explaining what had happened from the moment that he and Logan had been sitting in the car watching, up until he was shot. With those words, Scott interrupted him, his voice low and angry. “Shot?” He snapped out. His glasses lenses seemed to glow for a second. “You were shot? I told you two, I _told_ you to wait for backup!”

“We couldn’t exactly let them go in after the guy alone.” Logan pointed out. “How were we supposed to know they’d find him that quick? We didn’t realize they were that close.”

“Still! The situation could’ve been handled much, much better.” With a deep sigh, Scott reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Now isn’t the time for this. We’ll discuss that once we’re home. Continue, Remy. What happened next?”

Remy looked over to Spencer and then back to the group. He was casually leaned back against the wall, the picture of relaxation. Only Spencer knew just how much of an act it was. He knew the emotions boiling around underneath. But on the outside, Remy stayed calm, shrugging one shoulder. “Not quite sure what happened next, _mon ami_. It was like somet’ing in Remy reached out to somet’ing in him and den, den dere was light. Liquid sunshine, like Spencer said b’fore. It kinda filled us both.”

“It was like it was in my veins.” Spencer spoke up. He was proud that he managed to keep his voice steady. He didn’t want them knowing just how unnerved he truly was inside. “It ran through my veins and in my mind, pushing open pathways I never even knew were there, reaching into parts of my mind I’ve never accessed. Then it was just too much to handle. I think my body passed out from it all.”

“ _Oui_ , de same here. All dat light and den, just dark. Den Remy woke up in de hospital. Could hear Logan out dere arguing wit’ a nurse or someone. _Mais_ , dere was somet’ing else.” One of Remy’s hands produced a card from his pocket that he began twisting and flipping through his fingers. The gesture seemed to soothe him slightly. Still, he was showing his first external sign of nerves and the group of profilers easily caught that. Remy’s voice kept that same confident, even tone though. “It’s like dere’s a whole new section to m’ mind. Dis whole new area. An in it, dere’s dis bundle of emotions. A whole section, dedicated to dis man here. Can feel him dere, me. Nonstop.”

Spencer licked suddenly dry lips. “It’s the same for me. I could feel you from the instant I woke up.”

“You’ve linked.” Jean said. She stepped away from Scott, just slightly towards the two young men. Her eyes were looking at them, yet they left Spencer with the distinct impression that she wasn’t just looking at them, but at something else that none of them could see. “Stronger than anyone I’ve ever seen before. I’ve never seen anything quite like this.”

“Can you break the link?” Dave asked her.

Spencer shivered at the question. He didn’t even notice that he took a slight step to the right, in Remy’s direction, or that Remy had slid just a little more towards the left, towards Spencer. The idea of breaking the link had his whole body going tense. Yet his mind was focused on Jean, watching for her answer. This was what he wanted. Right? So why did the thought of it have fear trying to build inside of him?

Jean turned her sharp eyes back to Spencer and Remy and she stared for a long moment before shaking her head slowly. “No.” She finally said. “No, I can’t. It’s too deep. It reaches into too many different places. It ties you two together in a way I don’t understand, but it goes beyond just a simple mind link. It’s…it’s soul deep. I wouldn’t even begin to know how to try to separate you. I’m afraid to even try for fear of destroying you both in the process.”

Those words had a sobering effect. The hotel room fell silent under the weight of them. Spencer could feel the emotions that were swirling all over the place. The concern that was thick in the air, both for him and for Remy. Fear, sharp and tangy. Protectiveness, bright and hot and thick. Curiosity, a hint of mistrust, and a vague sort of clarity in the air that Spencer always associated with someone who was thinking hard. That emotion, that feeling, was only ever there when someone was focusing intently on something. He’d felt it countless times when the team was working on a part of their profile and they were all thinking hard about it.

It was Derek who broke the silence. His eyes were on Spencer and there was so much worry there for the man he considered like his little brother. “What are we going to do about this?”

At first, no one answered. Then one voice rose up, soft yet firm. “There’s only one solution that I can think of right now.” Scott said slowly. His head turned and Spencer knew that gaze was focused right on him. “You’ll have to come home with us, Dr. Reid. We’ve someone back home who might be able to help. He’ll be able to look at this link and study it and figure out not only what it is, but he might be able to puzzle out how it formed and from there, how to break it.”

Go home with them? Spencer was already shaking his head before Scott finished. “No.” he told them. There was no way he could just up and leave with these people! “I can’t just pack up and leave. I have a life of my own, a job. I can’t simply disappear for however long it takes your people to figure this out. How would I explain that to my work?” Not to mention the fact that he didn’t know these people. Did they honestly expect him to go with a group of people he didn’t even know? People who had abilities that he might not be able to fight back against? It would be taking a huge risk!

Scott didn’t waver. “It’s the only way I can see to try to fix whatever this is and to keep you two safe until we do. Who knows what kind of effect it’s going to have on the two of you?”

“So look at Remy and study him.” Spencer countered firmly. “Let them study his half of things. If a solution is figured out, I have no problems coming out for it to be taken care of. But I cannot simply take off for an unspecified amount of time to a place I’ve never been with people I don’t even know.”

Before anyone could say anything, before Scott could give the argument that Spencer saw sitting on his lips, Logan’s deep voice broke through, drawing all their attention and silencing the room with one simple question. “Do you really think you can be apart long enough for this to get figured out?” He looked at Spencer and then Remy before looking back again. “The two of ya haven’t gone more than two feet apart from one another since we came in the room and I don’t know about you, but Rem was all out of sort being apart from you for the short bit from the hospital to here. You really think you’ll be able to be apart while we try and fix this?”

Spencer found he didn’t have an easy answer for that. Logan’s question had stunned him into silence. Could he be apart from Remy? He had barely realized just how much the two of them were gravitating towards one another. Yet, Logan was right. They’d barely been more than a few feet apart since Remy had come in the room. Proof to point, Remy was only a foot away now, at most, and Spencer hadn’t even really realized it until just now. He hadn’t even noticed that the both of them had been steadily scooting towards one another ever since talk had turned to breaking the link.

The next person to speak up was Aaron, and his words were just as stunning to Spencer as Logan’s had been. “They’re right, Reid.” He didn’t flinch as all eyes snapped towards him. The Unit Chief simply met Spencer's gaze head on. “You know they’re right. This is something that needs to be taken care of. Until it is, you and I both know that you wouldn’t be safe in the field. Not for yourself and not for those around you. There’s no telling what this has done to you or what kind of influence it’s going to have, especially if we get a case on the other side of the country and you two have to separate that far. Because you know that he can’t travel with us and right now, just the mention of it has you two leaning in a little closer.”

He was right. The mention of being across country had brought the two unconsciously closer to one another. Spencer floundered for something to say. It felt like his whole world, his whole life, was crumbling apart around him. What was going on here? What had happened to him? “Hotch, I can’t just vanish. There’s no telling how long this might take to figure out and fix.” There was just a hint of a plea to those words. _Please, don’t make me go. Please don’t send me off alone to do this._

“We can put you on personal leave, Reid. I’ll take care of the paperwork to put you on emergency personal leave so that you don’t have to come back and deal with Strauss. The team can function until you come back.” Aaron said. His expression softened and Spencer could see the sympathy there. “I’m sorry, Reid. This is the smart choice here and I know that you see that. It’s your safest option.”

Derek stepped forward and put a hand on Spencer's shoulder, projecting support and strength. “He’s right, kid.” His words were almost reluctant, but they were firm. “It’s the smart thing to do. Plus, look at it this way. With your genius brain there to help, things should go even faster, right?”

They were saying all the right things, pointing out all the smart reasons for this to be done. Everything that they said made sense. Yet Spencer couldn’t stop the feeling of hurt that hit him. His friends were just signing him over to this group of people that he didn’t know, expecting him to go off with them to who-knows-where, stuck doing who-knows-what, and they expected him to just be okay with it? To just go with a group of total strangers and trust them to fix this? He wasn’t stupid; he knew that fixing something like a link would require the work of a telepath, just as he knew that this Jean woman was a telepath. Obviously they needed one stronger than her. That meant that he would be around, at minimum, two telepaths. Who knew what other powers he would be around! But what else could he do? He knew they were all right. This was the safe thing to do.

Spencer swallowed down the lump in his throat and he lifted his chin just a hair in a gesture that those who knew him knew meant he was gathering his pride and his famous control and locking down everything else. “When do we leave?”


	3. Chapter 3

The answer to his question had been ‘Immediately’. In no time at all, Spencer found himself with his go-bag packed and then he was saying his goodbyes to his friends. They all noted Spencer's slightly flat replies to them and they couldn’t help but worry even more. Derek watched the dullness to those brown eyes and he hated seeing it there. He waited until everyone else had said goodbye and filed away before he put his hand on Spencer's shoulder and drew his attention up with a low “Reid.”

Spencer stopped at the touch and the softly spoken word. He couldn’t quite bring himself to look at Derek’s face. “Yes?”

“I know you don’t like this, kid. It doesn’t take a profiler, or even an empath, to see that. But there aren’t many options. None of us like this any better than you do. Hotch wouldn’t have suggested it if he didn’t trust this Scott guy, though.”

Something flashed briefly in and out of Spencer's eyes. Then Spencer lifted eyes that had once more gone flat and dull, looking briefly at Derek’s face before looking away. “Sure, Morgan.” It was better, he told himself, to just reassure them. Let them feel like the right thing was being done. What good would come of pointing out that they were essentially leaving him in the care of a group of people they didn’t know, going to a place they didn’t know? Or pointing out that anything could happen to the young agent and no one would be able to stop it because no one would even know where he was? Spencer had been at the mercy of other people before. He knew the risks that came with it. But he knew that the team was already worried enough about him. There was no need to add on to it. He also refused to let the people he was going with see just how scared he was by this.

Grabbing his messenger bag, he pulled the strap over his head and then he lifted his go-bag. He gave Derek one last look. “I’ll be fine, Morgan. I’ll contact you guys as soon as I know anything.”

“You better call in before that, Reid.” Derek threatened him as they made their way out of the hotel room. He gave his friend a scowl that Spencer was well used to seeing. It was part of Derek’s overprotective look. “You check in regularly, you hear me, kid? Or I’ll have Garcia trace your call and then I’ll come kick your ass.”

That managed to tease a hint of a smile out of Spencer. Just a slight quirk to the edge of his lips. Only until his gaze fell on the group waiting for him by a car. Then, the smile fell away and that careful mask slipped back onto Spencer's face. It was a look that Derek hadn’t seen there in a long time. It was the one that Spencer had worn all the time when he’d first joined the BAU. One that might look normal to outsiders, but to people who knew him, it was a mask that sheltered the true feeling inside. Derek had learned over the years that Spencer had perfected that to keep people from seeing what he felt. Not just because it was safer that way—the few stories he’d told to back up that statement still left Derek furious some days at the people who could do things like that to someone simply for them being different—but also because he didn’t want people seeing how affected he could be sometimes by the emotions around him. One of his greatest fears was that someone would see how he reacted to emotions around him and realize that he was an empath. That they might notice how he flinched when people got angry, or how he could be in a happy crowd and get slightly high off those positive emotions. So, out of self-preservation, he’d learned this mask that kept everything hidden. It had been years and years since he’d done it with his friends. To see it slip into place now had Derek wanting to cringe a little. _Can’t this kid ever catch a break_?

Spencer kept his spine straight and his mask firmly in place while he walked towards the people and their car. There were no more goodbyes; those had been said already. There was only Aaron, once more reminding him “Check in as soon as you know something, Reid.” And then Spencer was putting his bag into the back of their car, this blue SUV, and he took one last look at his friends as he slid into the open seat. They stood by the motel room door, watching him, and Spencer saw their concern. His eyes traced over faces he knew so well. _I need to relax_ he thought to himself. _I will see them again. Once this is figured out, I will see them again, and everything will be back to normal._ Only, that sounded less like a reassurance and more like he was trying to convince himself.

Someone slid in to the seat next to him, arm and leg brushing his, and Spencer knew who it was without having to look. A hand touched his where it was resting on his thigh and Spencer jerked back, instinct taking over and keeping him from making the physical contact that he secretly craved. He felt a wave of reassurance and support slide over him, washing away the negativity, and suddenly he found himself doing something so out of the ordinary. Ever so slowly, he slid his hand back and turned his palm up in a silent request that was instantly honored. A long fingered hand clutched his in a show of support and a lending of strength. With that touch, Remy was letting him know that, wherever he was going, he wasn’t going alone. And even though he didn’t know this man, had never even met him before today, that thought was more reassuring than anything else that had been said. Spencer held on to it as Logan started the SUV and pulled out of the parking lot.

He kept holding on as they went down the road, further and further away from his friends. From his life, it felt. The car stayed silent as if the others understood his need. They granted him the respect of quiet until he could get his thoughts in order.

Eventually, someone finally did speak up. Spencer had actually been waiting for it. From the minute he’d agreed to come along, he’d been waiting for this moment.

“Now, before we arrive at our transportation, there is something we need to address.” Scott said into the quiet car. His gaze flashed up to his rearview mirror and Spencer knew those eyes were looking to him. “Where we’re going and how we get there, well, I’m sure you understand that they’re not quite things that we need the FBI knowing about, Dr. Reid.”

Spencer's expression never faltered. He kept his eyes on his window and he made sure his tone was even when he spoke. “I quite understand. Taking an FBI agent to the headquarters for the X-Men is dangerous enough. I won’t create any undue trouble—Cyclops.” _And chew on that a bit. I’m not going into this as ignorant as you may have thought._ He kept his expression controlled as shock filled the car. Remy’s shock was the easiest to feel, yet it was tempered by something else. Amusement, with just a hint of approval.

His words had Scott turning fully in the passenger’s seat so that he could look right at Spencer. The young genius turned and he could see the myriad of emotions that passed over Scott’s face before he finally settled and asked. “What makes you say that?”

“It was a simple enough deduction, sir.” Spencer kept his calm, but his hand clenched ever so slightly on Remy’s. This was dangerous ground. If they didn’t like this, he could find himself in deep trouble. He felt a squeeze in return and a swell of strength that helped him to keep in control. “One obvious clue was you. The glasses you wear might just be a fashion statement, though I highly doubt that. You’re very careful not to look over the top of them, or out the sides. The color of the lenses also matches the color of your visor in photos. Still, it could be me reading too much into it. That is, if it wasn’t for the flash I saw behind the lenses when you were angry at finding out that Remy had been shot. Those were clues enough as to your identity. I also know that Logan is Wolverine, though that’s not exactly a giant secret, now is it? Jean here is very obviously a telepath, as the viewing of a link is something that a telepath would be capable of, and she spoke of seeing our link. Remy is obviously a mutant, from what I saw in the forest when he threw the explosions. From all that, I could extrapolate the rest.”

Warming to his topic, Spencer lost a slight amount of his nerves. He didn’t notice the surprise as he continued to explain his findings. This was easy for him; comfortable. Facts were always comfortable. “When you mentioned bringing me home with you, you stated that there was someone there that might be able to help. A he, I believe you said. Now, with the fact that a telepath is needed to view the link in our minds, then obviously the person waiting back home is a telepath. One that is stronger than Jean here, who was afraid to touch our link for fear of hurting us. Either she’s extremely weak, which I doubt, or the telepath we’re going to see is very strong. Add all of those facts together and the logical conclusion stated that you, Cyclops, would be taking me back to the X-Men, most likely to see Professor X, rumored to be the strongest telepath on the planet.”

The car grew silent at the end of his speech. Spencer finally noticed the looks he was getting and he shifted awkwardly in his seat. His felt Remy’s other hand close over their joined ones, adding a little more strength to the touch, and he felt the man’s support.

A corner of Scott’s mouth quirked up. “That young face of yours, it makes people forget just how smart you must be, _doctor_. You don’t miss much, do you?”

“I’m a profiler. I’m trained to observe, sir.” Spencer said.

“I doubt we’d be able to do anything to disguise our transportation from you with a mind like yours. Your other senses would just pick up the details. So I’m going to make you a compromise, Dr. Reid. I’m going to trust you when it comes to boarding our flight home. However, you’re to ride in the back of the jet where you can’t view our controls or the coordinates of our destination. It’ll be up to the Professor if he chooses to disclose anything more to you. Right now, I need to do what’s best for my people.”

The honesty and integrity in those words were both points in Scott’s favor. It raised the man up just a little more in Spencer's estimation. “I understand.”

“Good. We’re almost to the ‘bird.” And just like that, Scott turned to peek at Jean, his conversation with Spencer done. “Did you set up someone to pick up this car and return it for us?”

“I did.” Jean said.

Though conversation continued around him, Spencer paid no attention. He settled himself better in his seat and returned his gaze to the window. For the rest of the ride, he stayed quiet, and he and Remy continued to hold hands.

CXCX

Remy had to hand it to his companion. No matter what was thrown his way, the mask that Dr. Reid wore never seemed to slip. All that he allowed to show on the outside that looked like honest emotion was shyness. Otherwise, he kept neutral, showing nothing much one way or the other. Even the sight of the Blackbird didn’t elicit a response from him. There was a flash of curiosity and a small hint of surprise inside of their link. Mostly, though, the link was showing a slight…Remy could only describe it as dullness. Like the shine had been taken off something. He watched carefully as he and Dr. Reid took the seats in the back, away from everyone. It didn’t take him long to realize _why_ it felt as if Dr. Reid’s emotions had dulled. Pairing that with the neutral expression that had suddenly gone just slightly blank, Remy knew what was going on. Dr. Reid was in shock. The evening was finally catching up with him and he was in shock. He couldn’t blame the man, really. Remy was feeling it slightly himself. Honestly, he had a feeling that the only thing that kept him from being in complete shock was this insanely strong need inside of him to look out for the man beside him.

That protectiveness seemed to have permeated his entire being. It was like it wasn’t just a sensation anymore. It was a part of his very makeup. Like it was hardwired into him—protect this man. Protect Reid. But _why_? He couldn’t help but feel frustrated over it. Why the hell was he feeling so protective over someone he didn’t even know? What the hell had done this to them?

His anger peaked for a second. Before it could get a chance to grow, he saw Reid flinch ever so slightly beside him and he immediately shoved the anger down. The young man must’ve felt that over their link. He was casting a cautious look towards Remy, yet at the same time he actually leaned _in_ instead of _away_. Though he didn’t reach out and touch as he had at the hospital when Remy had been angry, he did lend his presence, letting their arms brush together lightly, and calming sensations were sent over the link.

Remy had always been a touchy person. He’d always liked to touch the people he talked to, whether it was a hand on the arm or knee or an arm around the shoulders or a ruffle of their hair. He liked to touch. It was just who he was. That part of him seemed to be even more in play now, with Spencer. He reached out and patted the man’s thigh, right above his knee. “ _Désolé,_ Dr. Reid. It wasn’t y’ dat Remy was angry wit’.”

A brown eye peeked up through long bangs for a second before flashing back down. “You don’t have to call me doctor.” He said in a low voice. “My name’s Spencer Reid. Most people just call me Reid.”

A smile tugged at Remy’s lips. “Spencer Reid, hm? Dat’s an old name, Spencer. Not one y’ hear often no more.”

“My mother picked it. She has a liking for older things.” His eyes flashed up once more before fixing down on his lap. “She was a Professor of fifteenth century literature.”

“So, smarts runs in de family, _oui_?”

All around them, the Blackbird had been coming to life. It rose now for its launch and Remy felt the familiar sensation as it set off through the sky. He ignored all of it, as well as the others at the front, instead choosing to focus on the man beside him. Their conversation seemed to be drawing Spencer out slightly and breaking down the shock he was in. That was exactly what Remy wanted. He let his smile warm and turned just enough to better be able to face him. “Been meaning to ask, me. Y’r Dr. Reid, _mais_ what’s y’r degree in? Working fo’ de FBI, it aint likely it’s a medical degree.”

For a second he wasn’t sure if Spencer would answer. He saw those long, slender fingers clasp briefly together before Spencer forced them to relax. “I have Ph.D.’s in engineering, mathematics and chemistry. I, ah, I also have B.A.’s in psychology, sociology and philosophy.”

“Six? Y’ got six different degrees? _Dieu_ , dat’s impressive. Y’ must’ve started young.”

“I obtained my first degree by fifteen and my first Ph.D. by sixteen. I have an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory.”

The words had the sound of a speech he was well used to reciting. Also, one he was well used to having people doubt or question. Remy did neither. He let Spencer feel how impressed he was by that and then he moved on, not dwelling on the subject, something that surprised Spencer. “Bet all dem degrees come in handy wit’ y’r work, _oui_? Y’r BAU, right? A profiler?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Heard of profilers, me. _Mais_ never was sure I understood it all right. Y’ make a psychological profile of de killer, aint dat right?”

That was all it took to get Spencer to start talking. Little by little, Remy got the conversation going, making sure to ask questions. He was interested in Spencer's work; it sounded intriguing. Mostly, though, he wanted the young man relaxed, and this sure was doing the job. The more that Spencer spoke about his work, the more relaxed he became and the more animated his speech became. Encouraging him to talk more was how Remy discovered Spencer's tendency to ramble when he got onto a subject he enjoyed, and his tendency to spout statistics off the top of his head as if they were nothing. From the front of the jet, the others looked back, amazed by the fountain of information that was pouring from the kid. Remy just sat there, encouraging him to keep going with more questions, a pleased little smile on his lips the whole time.

The conversation continued all the way until their arrival at the mansion. Then Spencer fell silent once more, his nerves seeming to return tenfold. Remy thought that he understood that better than the others did. Spencer was now in unfamiliar territory, surrounded by people he didn’t know with powers he couldn’t begin to guess at, with no friend or coworker at his side to help him through this. He was, in a sense, alone.

No, not alone. As they made their way down the ramp and off the Blackbird, Remy and Spencer walking side by side, the Cajun reached over and took Spencer's hand in his. He felt Spencer jump at the surprise touch. Then the hand in his gave a soft squeeze in thanks. The skin to skin contact seemed to help wash away some of his fear. The man straightened ever so slightly and walked with just a hint more confidence. Seeing it warmed Remy’s insides. Spencer may’ve been shy about touching. However, judging by his reactions, it was something he craved more than he could admit to. Remy kept the touch and let it soothe down the both of them. Together, the two followed Scott down the hall to a smaller meeting room that was down here in the sublevels. It wasn’t often used, but it came in handy for the random meeting that Scott held with few individuals, or when Charles wanted a meeting with some but didn’t want to use something like the war room or his office. They all moved into there now, finding Charles and Hank already waiting for them.

The Professor had his usual calm serenity to him. He sat at the head of the rectangular table in here, it and the chairs the only pieces of furniture in the room, his hands folded down in his lap. His eyes moved over the others yet focused on Spencer and Remy. “Welcome home.” He greeted them all. “And welcome to my home, Dr. Reid. It’s a pleasure to meet you. I am Professor Charles Xavier. Beside me here is my colleague, Dr. Hank McCoy.” With one hand he gestured toward Hank, who had risen from his seat beside the professor at their entrance.

Tension ran bright in Spencer. His outside stayed calm, though. He lifted his free hand and gave a little wave that had Remy smiling and Logan grinning as he shook his head. Spencer flushed a little at their obvious humor, but he didn’t turn away from the Professor. “Thank you for having me in your home. It’s nice to meet you Professor. And you, Doctor.” With each title, Spencer inclined his head slightly at the men. He was all polite manners.

Hank smiled brightly. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Dr. Reid. I’ve read quite a few of your papers, as well as your dissertation. If your time is free at some point, I’d dearly love to discuss some of your work with you. I have a few questions I’d love to ask.”

Now that surprised Spencer. He flushed ever so slightly and a hint of a true smile graced his face. “I’d enjoy that, sir.”

Charles cleared his throat and all attention turned his way. “It appears that quite a few things have happened today.” He began, looking from one person to the next. His gaze settled on Remy. “Let me start this by saying how glad I am to see you up and well, Remy. Whatever has happened, I’m very happy to hear that it somehow managed to save you.”

The honesty he felt in that statement was both surprising and nice, all at once. “ _Merci,_ Charles.”

He nodded to Remy in acknowledgement and then returned to the subject at hand. “I’ve heard of what happened and I’ve been given reports from Jean and Scott both. They’ve given me their understanding of what has happened. So why don’t we settle straight down to business? If you two would come and have a seat, we can begin to see what we might be able to do about all of this.”

The two men took their seats side by side. At Charles’ direction, they pulled their chairs back to the wall first, allowing room for him to come in front of them. The others took their seats at the other side of the table to watch and wait. Hank stayed ready at the side, just in case something happened.

“Walk me through how this bond was formed.” Charles requested. “I would like to hear this in your own words. What exactly were you doing at the time, Dr. Reid?”

“I was applying pressure to the bleeding and trying to talk to him, to keep him calm until help could arrive. I knew medics were waiting near for the call. We were prepared for almost any eventuality at that house.” Spencer said. He shifted in his seat and looked down before looking back up. “Then, it’s as I told the others. I could feel something in him reaching up and something inside of me responded to it. Then, the light was there. The heat.”

Charles nodded. Sharp eyes turned towards Remy. “And you, Remy? What were you doing?”

“Bleeding.” Remy said sarcastically. Before anyone could say anything, he waved a hand, dismissing his own answer, trying to push back the defensiveness he was feeling. “ _Désolé._ Was lying dere and felt somet’ing reach past m’ pain. It was like it…it called out to me.” The memory of it washed over Remy and his voice went a little distant. He remembered how it had felt. The pain, yes, but that _heat_ , that light. “I felt somet’ing when I saw de _homme_ in danger. Dat part came back and it reached out fo’ dis t’ing. Den de two touched, and de light came.”

The room was silent as Remy took a second to gather his composure back. He felt Spencer at the edge of his mind, touching his emotions, steadying them until he found his ‘feet’ once more.

Charles was watching them with a look of speculation on his face. “Okay. I’m going to take a look at the two of you and see if I can view how exactly this link binds you together. But, to do this, I’m going to need you to lower your shields enough to let me in to see. Not completely” He added that quickly, knowing how Remy felt about letting any telepath into his mind. “But enough to at least see. I have to follow the lines of this link to see where they’re rooted to. Are you two ready for this?”

They turned to look at each other and Remy felt a questioning sensation from Spencer, twined together with nerves and a strong fear. He knew what the man was asking without having to hear the words. He was asking Remy if Charles was to be trusted. If it was truly safe to let the man in. Remy may not have liked the idea but he knew that this was their only choice right now. He cocked his head and shrugged a little, resigned to this. Spencer's lips twitched in response and the man nodded. Together, the two closed their eyes and took a deep breath. Neither realized that they reached out as they did, hands connecting and fingers twining together again. Charles noticed and filed that little fact away in his mind for later. He waited for the shields over each man’s mind to lower enough to allow him in, noting that the two lowered at the exact same time, as if they were somehow connected. With a steadying breath, Charles closed his eyes and reached out his mind.

A scream like they’d never heard before filled the room, sharp and full of pain.


	4. Chapter 4

Nothing could’ve prepared Spencer for the pain that filled him when Charles touched his mind. It was absolute agony. He heard the scream that echoed around them and was only vaguely aware that it came from him. All he could think about was getting the pain to stop. Emotions that were too strong were pouring into his mind like acid. His hands came up to his head and his body curled in as he fought to try and raise his shields. He gave a great mental shove, forcing the man away from his mind, not even noticing how his emotional shove sent Charles snapping back in his chair. A pair of arms came around Spencer and he found himself yanked close in an embrace he didn’t know yet felt totally safe in. Remy’s emotions swarmed his mind, soothing the channels there that felt blasted raw, wrapping him in warmth and protection. He felt the protectiveness burning inside the man and an anger that made Spencer want to cry out again. One of the arms around him moved and a hand stroked over Spencer's hair soothingly. “What’d y’ do to him?” Remy was demanding furiously. “What de hell did y’ do to him?”

Spencer fought to draw on his strength to show his shields up. He felt a sudden inflow of strength and, with a gasp, he yanked his shields up a little more, blocking out a little more pain. With that bit of clarity came the realization that the strength he’d just drawn on hadn’t been his—it had been Remy’s. He actually drew real strength from Remy to pull his walls up. Remy seemed to realize that at the same time. Instead of being upset about it, as Spencer had been afraid of for a second, Remy actually fed more strength to him, allowing him to erect his shields the rest of the way. Doing so had him slumping in relief. There was the residual ache left over but the sharpest part of it was gone.

There were voices around him that Spencer could barely focus on. He felt Remy’s hand still stroking over his hair, the other holding him close, and he realized belatedly that his own hands had moved off his head to clutch tightly in the front of Remy’s jacket. Embarrassment had him trying to shift away. Remy just tightened his grip and made a shushing sound. “It’s okay, cher. Y’r fine.” He said, ever so gently. Then his voice hardened and that anger spiked again. Spencer realized that the anger wasn’t for him when he heard Remy repeat his previous question “What’d y’ do to him, Professor?”

“I was merely trying to reach to his mind.” Charles answered quickly. “However, I think I know what might’ve gone wrong, and I can’t believe I didn’t make the connection before. Dr. Reid, I have a very delicate question to ask you and I assure you, you are safe here. But can you tell me, are you an empath?”

The whole room went silent. Spencer's body stilled in shock. This had been the one thing he’d hoped to keep quiet. One secret that he’d needed to stay secret. If the truth of it got out, his life could be ruined. He’d lose his job at the Bureau, lose the work that he loved, and in a way he’d lose his friends as well. Not because they would want to, but because the job didn’t allow for much of a life outside of their work. _But you knew you’d have to say something to them, just like you had to with Seaver_ his mind whispered to him. _Your empathy could very well be tied into this link. Plus, there’s no real choice now. He’s already figured it out; he’s just seeking your confirmation. You don’t have a choice in this_. Spencer didn’t think about it as he turned his face in just a little bit more against Remy’s jacket. His whispered answer seemed to echo around them. “Yes.”

“Damn.” Logan breathed out.

Jean’s voice was full of shock as well. “You’re a mutant and you work for the FBI?”

“Yes.” Spencer said again at the same time that Remy scoffed. His arms tightened just the slightest bit around Spencer. “Didn’t y’all realize?” He asked them. “He told y’ dat somet’ing in him reached out fo’ somet’ing in Remy.”

Without giving anyone the chance to continue on that track, Charles once more took control of the conversation. “All of that may be discussed later. For now, it helps me to understand what just happened.” He fixed his eyes on Spencer—and, in turn, on Remy, seeming to understand that it wasn’t just Spencer he had to explain himself to on this—and he told him “If I had known you were an empath, I would’ve taken certain precautions when I tried to read you, Dr. Reid. I am so sorry for the pain I caused. For those with minimal empathy, having a telepath in their mind is nothing. They register it the same as the rest of it. But for a strong empath, for a true empath like yourself, precautions have to be taken. Otherwise, you’re left feeling the straight, raw emotions of the other person, not just in the room around you but directly inside your mind. Now that I know, I can put up the appropriate shields and that pain will not happen again.”

“Are y’ sure about dat? Absolutely sure?” Remy demanded.

One of Spencer's hands shifted to pat at Remy’s shoulder, a soothing sort of stroke, at the same time that he drew back up and straightened in his seat. His eyes stayed on the Professor. “You’re not lying to me. I can tell that much.” He took a deep breath and dropped his hands back to his lap. All signs of the pain he’d been in only moments before was gone, his face hidden once more by that mask. “Let’s try this again, sir. I’m ready when you are.”

“All right. Both of you, close your eyes and relax.”

The room fell silent as the three individuals closed their eyes.

CXCX

By the time the three opened their eyes again, all of them were exhausted. It took them a few moments to gather their composure and reorient themselves. A look at the clock showed that more time had passed than they’d realized. Forty five minutes had gone by since they’d started this! It hadn’t felt like it while they were doing it. But as the three came back to themselves, they all showed signs of exhaustion. Remy slumped back in his seat, feeling Spencer do the same beside him. Across from them, Charles had even slumped slightly in his chair. “ _Merde._ ” Remy mumbled. “What de hell y’ do to us, Professor?”

Charles drew in a breath and made himself straighten up a little in his seat. “You two have the most extraordinary shielding. It fought against me even as you two tried to hold it back.”

“You said ‘it’, not ‘they’.” Spencer spoke up. His voice was just a little bit tight.

His words had Charles nodding. “Yes. While still technically separate, both of your mental shields seem to be feeding off of one another so that I would consider them more one entity than separate ones. Though I never saw your shields before this to be able to accurately say, Dr. Reid, I’d guess that both of your shields are stronger than they were before you joined together.”

“And dis joining together part?” Remy asked. “What about dat?”

There was suddenly a look to the Professor’s face that had both men sitting up at attention. They squeezed hands, not even noticing that they’d scooted a little closer together while they’d been doing this, or that they had linked arms as well as hands between them. Charles had taken note of the physical connection between them and filed it away with everything else he’d been observing. This was truly one of the most extraordinary things he had ever seen. “I am going to be extremely honest with the both of you. The link between you, this bond, is like nothing I’ve ever seen before. It is so much more pervasive than a simple mind link or even an empathic link. It is stronger, deeper, more twined to your actual cores. It goes into parts of your mind I wasn’t even capable of accessing. Your shields blocked me too well from going that far in.” His expression softened and the two felt his sympathy. “I saw no way to break it. I’m afraid that, if I tried, the resulting effect would greatly damage the both of you. Not just your minds, but the rest of you as well. It could destroy your minds. It could even kill you.”

The room went silent as the two processed this. Somehow, it wasn’t that surprising. Remy didn’t find himself as shocked by the news as one might’ve thought he would be. He’d felt it as they had been looking inside themselves at this link. He’d seen the ways it twined them together. Turning his head, he looked over at Spencer's face, looking the man over. So they were going to be stuck this way, were they? That meant that this man beside him was going to be a part of his life for the _rest_ of his life. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that. To be tied to someone this way forever, someone that he didn’t even know? The idea of that should piss him off. At the very least, it should bother the hell out of him. Yet Remy couldn’t help one random thought that floated to the surface— _I won’t ever be alone again_.

Oh, he had people around him, people that cared. Or, at least, he _thought_ they cared. Sometimes he wasn’t sure. Even with feeling their emotions, he wasn’t sure. There were times that their emotions were too muddy for him to feel and understand. But this person right here would always be someone that he would know what they were feeling. He would always know that he had this person in his life. So even when bad things happened, even if he was ever left somewhere again, alone, he would always be able to carry the knowledge that there was one person somewhere that needed him in their life, even if it was because they had to. There was something comforting in that.

He watched the play of expression on Spencer's face, matching it with the emotions he felt from him. A lift of the eyebrow, a turn of his head. He didn’t know Spencer well enough to know what those expressions meant. That was something that came with time. From the sounds of it, they would have plenty of time to get to know one another. Time enough to learn the things that made each other tick. What kind of person was he? Was he loud and pushy like Rogue could get? Was he sweet, until someone pushed those right buttons, like Jean could be? Was he a bit of a stick-in-the-mud like Warren? There were so many things that they had to learn about one another. Because, come hell or high water, it looked like they were stuck together.

Spencer broke the silence that had fallen over the room. “And how much of ourselves are we going to lose because of this?” His words were soft, yet they packed a punch. Wide, aching eyes lifted to them all, the barriers that had been there so far now fractured slightly. “How much of me is still going to be me?”

“You are still you, Dr. Reid.” Charles reassured him.

Spencer shook his head before Charles had even finished. “No, I’m not. I’m sorry, sir, but I’m not.” He got up suddenly and paced away from them, all the way to the wall before he spun back. Those expressive eyes turned to Remy and there was anger there, born of fear and desperation. “Have you noticed how often we touch? How many times I’ve reached out for you? Not to mention the countless times I’ve wanted to but managed to resist. Or how much I allow you in my personal space?” He paused and let out a mirthless chuckle. “Allow? I seek it out. I _crave_ it. I crave this constant skin to skin contact with you as if it were as vital as air.”

“It’s de same fo’ me.” Remy reached up and pulled his sunglasses off entirely. Something in him needed to make sure they could meet eyes. “I feel de same way, Spencer.”

“But don’t you see? _That’s not me_!” The impassioned words ripped out of the young genius with more emotion than ever. Spencer emphasized his point by tapping his chest with a fist. “I am not a tactile person. I keep my distance, my own personal ‘bubble’ as Garcia calls it. But I do _not_ hold hands with people, or practically climb into their lap, and I do not let people sit and restrain me and pet at me. I don’t even like to shake hands! Yet with you, I not only allow it. I apparently _crave_ it, like I’m addicted. And now you, Professor, tell me that this is something you see no way of changing. Something you don’t believe can be broken. Yet you try to turn around and say that I am still me? Tell me where I am in the center of all this? Tell me where Spencer Reid is? Because I sure as hell can’t see him!” With that last, pained cry, the man spun and marched right out the door. When Remy made to go after him, Logan grabbed his arm, locking eyes with his friend. “Let me. I’ll talk to him.”

First instinct was to break Logan’s grip on him by any means necessary and then go after Spencer. Something primal in Remy snarled for it. But the rational side of him, the one that had always been there to save his ass countless times throughout his life, spoke up and told him that he might very well be the last person that Spencer wanted to see right now and that he could trust Logan. He did trust Logan, like he trusted no one else here. After one long, charged pause, Remy nodded. Logan wasted no time in letting go and hurrying out of the room.

Remy’s body quivered with the need to go after Spencer. It went against everything in him to let the man go out of his sight like this. Especially in a place that Spencer didn’t know, around people he didn’t know, while he was in such emotional turmoil. Those emotions churned in their link until Remy thought he’d be sick from it. He turned his head without thinking about it, looking unerringly in the direction that Spencer was, his eyes distant as if he could see straight through the walls to the man. “Y’ know, he’s right.” Remy’s words were given in a flat, even voice. He was trying to control his own emotions, which were feeding off of Spencer's so that he almost couldn’t tell them apart. “Everyone knows dat I like to touch when I talk. _Mais_ , wit’ him, it aint a ‘like’, it’s a need. Like he said—a craving. M’ whole life, m’ world, feels like it’s been ripped apart and put back together and dere’s one t’ing at de center of it all—Spencer. Everyt’ing I do, everyt’ing I feel, everyt’ing I am, centers ‘round him.” His eyes turned back towards them and they saw the snap of both his temper and his fear. “Like right now. Y’ know how hard it is fo’ me not to go after him? It’s screaming in me to go make sure dat he’s okay, to try to take away dat hurt, and to make sure I’m dere to guard him so dat he’s safe. Above all, I have dis huge urge to keep him safe. Even here. Dat aint me. I care fo’ people, sure. Been told I care too much, sometimes. _Mais_ never not’ing like dis. And y’r telling us dat we’re stuck dis way?”

“Remy.” Charles broke in gently. “I am not giving up on helping the two of you. I said that I do not believe _I_ can help you. But something about this seems vaguely familiar. As if I’d heard the rumor of a rumor before. Please, do not give up hope. Let me make some calls and see what it is I can discover. I _will_ help you if at all possible.”

“Might’ve been a good idea to lead with dat.” Remy’s voice carried a hint of bitter sarcasm to it. He shook his head and looked away from them all, back in the direction of Spencer. “Remy’s gon’ go make up a room fo’ de _homme_. Y’ let Logan know, Jeannie? Should be ready in about fifteen minutes, tops.”

All of them noticed that he wasn’t ‘asking’. The behavior reminded them slightly of Logan; very protective and territorial. Jean smiled gently at him. “Of course, sweetie.”

Without another word, Remy turned and left the room.

CXCX

Spencer hadn’t gone far from the room when he realized an important mistake. He had no idea where he was or how the hell to get out of here. But he knew he couldn’t go back in that stifling room. He couldn’t go back around all those people, those emotions. He just _couldn’t_. So he went to the only place he knew here; the hanger, where the Blackbird was. In there, he fell back to an instinct that hadn’t surfaced in a long time—he found a spot hidden by crates where he could slide down to the ground, curl his knees to his chest, and be completely hidden from view. Anyone walking in would miss him completely. Once he was tucked into his hiding spot, he folded his arms over his knees and bowed his head. Well, wasn’t this all just one royal mess?

This day was just too much. Too many things all happening in one day. Spencer felt like he was stretched to his very limit. Whatever cushion shock had granted him before was long gone now. His very life had changed today in ways he didn’t understand and these people here were essentially telling him that there was nothing that could be done about it. Spencer hadn’t realized just how much he was hinging his hope on this man helping them until he was told that it wasn’t possible. If a man rumored to be the world’s strongest telepath couldn’t see a way to separate Spencer and Remy without doing serious damage or even killing them, then what hope was there? Was he going to really spend the rest of his life _bonded_ to someone that he didn’t even know?

Of all people for this to happen with, why had it been this strange man he’d never met before? This guy was a part of the X-Men, for Pete’s sake! Why on earth would one of the X-Men want anything to do with a scrawny, nerdy little Fed who looked more like an analyst than a field agent? Spencer looked like the opposite of everything this Remy guy was. And that little tantrum he’d just thrown back in that room probably hadn’t helped matters any, either.

Emotions touched the edge of Spencer's shields and warned him that someone was coming long before he heard any footsteps. He lifted his head from his knees and watched carefully, body unconsciously tensing. It surprised him when Logan came around the edge of a few crates and looked right to him. He shouldn’t have been able to be found here. Then again, this was the Wolverine. What the government knew about the man mentioned something about heightened senses. It would make sense that he’d tracked him here. He’d probably scented him, or heard him somehow.

The guy didn’t say anything right away. He looked at where Spencer had tucked himself between the wall and some crates and it looked like he was debating for a second before he shrugged. Then he strolled forward and dropped down to the ground just a few feet in front of Spencer. Back against the wall, he stretched his legs out in front of him, crossing them at the ankles. Only once he was settled in did he turn his head towards Spencer. “Thought you might need some company.”

Spencer softly snorted his disbelief at that. “Remy send you to watch over me?”

Logan didn’t seem the least bit phased by Spencer's slightly surly tone. “Nope, I volunteered. Figured he might not be the one you wanna see right now.”

Oh. Spencer dropped his gaze down in embarrassment. Some of his temper faded out of him. He never held on to his anger very well. It usually left him with a sick feeling in his stomach that he hated. Being angry with someone was hard to do when you could feel just how much your anger hurt them. “Thanks.” He finally murmured. It was kind on Logan’s part. There was a part of Spencer that really didn’t want to see Remy right now. But, and this was beyond frustrating, the major part of him actually wanted nothing more than for Remy to come strolling in. He wanted the comforting touch of Remy’s hand in his once more. If he were honest with himself, he wanted the comfort he’d found in his arms back there. That sense of peace and safety that he’d found as Remy had held him close like he were something special that was worth protecting. But that was far more honest than Spencer wanted to be with himself. He shoved that thought down. Far, far down.

He made himself look up once more at his companion. “So, how bad did my tantrum make things? People didn’t feel too happy in there.”

“Tantrum? You call that a tantrum?” Pulling a cigar out of his pocket, Logan let out a laugh before chomping down on the end. “Shit, Stretch. Considering what’s been tossed your way, I’d say you’re doing pretty fucking good here. If any of them got a problem with it, tell em where to shove it.”

His blunt words startled a laugh out of Spencer. That sounded close to something Derek would’ve told him. Leaning forward a bit, he rested his chin on his folded arms. “I’d rather not antagonize the people here anymore than I already have, thank you very much.”

“Don’t knock it till you try it. Hell, pissing off Cyke is my favorite part of the day. Gumbo and I got it down to an art form.” Logan paused and held the cigar up in a questioning way, waiting for Spencer's nod before he set about lighting it. When he got it lit, he took a good puff and then tapped one finger along his jawline, grinning broadly. “You know you got him good when that vein in his jaw jumps.”

That drew yet another soft laugh from Spencer. But as quickly as the good mood came on, it faded away, reality sinking back in.

Logan drew his knees up, resting his arms on them and letting his hands dangle. His humor faded away as well to be replaced by a serious look. “You know, you’re not really alone in this, even if it feels like you are. Rem’s right there with you.”

“I know.” Spencer sighed again and let his eyes close a little until he didn’t have to look right at Logan anymore. “But we’re stuck together, him and I. Not by choice, but by something we don’t understand. Something that forced us together. Have you ever had someone stick by you, not because they wanted to, but because they had to? It breeds hate in people. I don’t…I don’t want to feel that from someone, not ever again. Especially not from someone whose feelings I can’t seem to block out.”

The room was quiet as Logan processed what Spencer said. The feral man couldn’t mistake the emotion in those words. There was no doubt in his mind that Spencer had felt that quite often. The pain in his voice wasn’t just from one incident. It was the kind of pain that came from long exposure. It tugged at the part of Logan that always sought to protect those that the Wolverine perceived as weaker. He reached a hand out and rested it on Spencer's leg, giving him a light squeeze. “The Cajun can be a mean son of a bitch, I’ll grant you that, kid. But he aint got it in him to truly hate. Especially not someone like you.”

That had Spencer turning his face upwards. Curiosity shone bright in his eyes. “Someone like me?”

“Yeah.” Logan flashed a grin down at him. “You’ve got too much good in ya, too much heart, for Rem to ever get up more than a good mad at you. And you’ll learn to ignore him when he’s mad anyways. He likes getting that way sometimes.”

Spencer smiled softly at that. He closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath, then another. Sitting here and freaking out wasn’t going to accomplish anything. Panic like this wasn’t the way to go. He needed to calm down, relax, and think. There was no way he was going to be able to figure out anything if he didn’t relax. So far two telepaths had taken a look at things and proclaimed them unable to be fixed. That didn’t mean that nothing could help, though. Spencer was an empath, a strong one, and he had seen the bond in an entirely different light than Charles. Not to mention he had an extremely unique viewpoint, seeing as how he was one of the bonded people. Maybe there was a way that empathy could fix this where telepathy couldn’t. Maybe, if he applied himself, there might be something that he could do. But to do that he was going to have to stop acting like an idiot and hiding out here behind some crates like a scared child.

With that mental scolding, he shook himself off and gathered his control once more. That mask he’d been wearing before slipped back into place now. It was his best and only defense here in a household of people he didn’t know. Logan was right, he wasn’t alone in this. But in all honesty Remy was just as much of a stranger as anyone else here. The only difference was that Spencer didn’t have to wonder about what Remy truly felt or what his motives really were. The bond gave that away.

Logan watched as the young kid gathered up his control and wrapped it around him like a shield. The scared kid that had been there before was gone now and in its place was a young man who looked calm and entirely in control of himself. “It’s been a long day.” Spencer said, unfolding himself from his curled up position. “Is there somewhere that I might be able to rest for a while?”

“Yeah, kid. Jeannie says Rem’s prepping a room for you up stairs.” Logan pushed up off the ground, rising at the same time that Spencer did. He looked him over for a moment before gesturing with one hand. “C’mon.” Together, the two set out from the hanger.


	5. Chapter 5

Spencer felt a mixture of amusement and surprise as Logan took him through the elevator and up to the main part of the house. His eyes took in everything around him and his brain cataloged everything in a way that was just habit for him. Everything he saw was taken in and filed away in a spot labeled _later_ in his mind. For now there were just too many other important things to think of that took up the main part of his thoughts. The further into the house they went, though, the less Spencer found himself thinking about those important things and the more he found himself focusing on that bundle of emotions that was ‘Remy’ in his mind. He’d tried to ignore the feelings there while he’d been talking with Logan. But they were getting stronger, closer, and he couldn’t ignore them now.

Temper had been there before, which had worried Spencer. That had slowly faded away, though. Now there was the sensation of worry tempered by a sort of distance that Spencer associated with someone thinking hard about a problem. A little twist of emotions that had always signaled to him someone was focusing on a problem inside their head. It wasn’t hard to figure out what it was that Remy would be thinking about. This was going to be on both their minds for quite a while, Spencer knew. Until they got some things figured out.

Lost in his introspection, he hadn’t really paid full attention to where they were going. Not until Logan said “Right over here, kid.”

Spencer blinked his eyes a few times to clear them and to bring his focus back to the present. It was in just enough time for them to turn down a hall and for him to be led up to one of the doors. The door was wide open and Spencer knew who he’d find before he even reached it. He could easily feel Remy was in there. Sure enough, they found the Cajun in the room, only he wasn’t doing what Spencer had expected. What he’d thought he’d find Remy doing, he wasn’t sure, but making the bed sure hadn’t been it. Yet that’s exactly what Remy was doing. He was just finishing tucking the top of the blankets in as Logan and Spencer came in the room.

“Dere y’ are.” Remy said, smoothing the last of the bedding. He straightened up and flashed a smile towards them, though his eyes focused on Spencer. There was honest pleasure on his face and Spencer felt a bit of relief in Remy’s emotions that he didn’t quite understand. He didn’t analyze it too much, either. Most of his attention was on trying to control himself. The minute he’d caught sight of Remy he’d been caught up in the strong urge to walk right over to the man and latch on. Such an uncharacteristic need had him both embarrassed and uncomfortable and he covered it by clearing his throat and looking away.

“Got de room prepped fo’ y’ an aired out. Brought y’r bag up from de ‘Bird, too, an set it out over here fo’ y’.” With one hand Remy gestured to where Spencer's go bag was sitting on top of a dresser. He strolled around the bed and made another gesture, this one towards a door at the far end of the room. “Charles said t’ go ahead and give y’ one of de suites, so y’ got y’r own bat’room over dere. We t’ought y’ might like de privacy instead of havin’ t’ share de bat’room down de hall.”

“Thank you.” Spencer murmured politely. He didn’t know what else to say.

Logan clapped one hand on Spencer's shoulder, ignoring the flinch it brought. He gave a squeeze and a small shake before letting go. “I’ll let you get settled in, Stretch. Catch ya later.” With that, he was gone, leaving Spencer and Remy alone in the room. Why that made Spencer even more nervous, he didn’t know. He was full of conflicting emotions. Nervous in Remy’s presence, yet strangely comfortable in some ways. Judging by what he could feel, the feelings were mutual.

The nerves were winning out, though. Spencer stuffed his hands down into his pockets and looked around the room to avoid having to look directly at the other man. There was something he wanted to say and he found it easier to not have to look at him while he did. “I wanted to say that I, um, that I’m sorry about before. I, I don’t typically have a temper like that and you didn’t deserve to get yelled at.”

“Meh.” Remy shrugged one shoulder casually. “Aint no big deal, cher. We both got a right t’ blow, Remy t’inks. Dis was just y’r turn at it.”

Surprised by Remy’s easy going attitude, Spencer cast a look up at the man through his bangs. “You seem rather…relaxed, about all this.”

Remy actually flashed a grin at that. “Remy’s a realist, _homme_. Dis t’ing, it can’t be changed, so why stress over it, _non_? Gotta make de best of what’s given.”

“That’s a pragmatic way of looking at things.”

He watched emotion dart over Remy’s face and felt it as it flittered through the man. What he finally settled on wasn’t what Spencer had expected. Concern flowed through the brightest of all, colored around the edges by that protectiveness that never seemed to go away for Remy and something else that Spencer couldn’t quite place. The man finally broke his pose from beside the bed and took a step towards him. With one hand Remy reached out and brushed a bit of Spencer's hair back from his face with just a brief touch. “What is it, _mon ami_? What set y’ back on edge all of a sudden?”

Oh, this was definitely going to take some getting used to. Spencer knew his emotional turmoil hadn’t shown on the outside and his shields were up enough that he wasn’t projecting. This bond apparently allowed Remy to feel him just as strongly as he was feeling Remy. He wasn’t used to having someone that could essentially see past everything that he put up. Nor was he used to the urge that filled him, prompting him to actually answer Remy’s question honestly instead of brushing him off. His hands curled into fists in his pockets as he resisted the urge to reach out for a touch of his own. He wasn’t quite sure what to say or what to do. How did someone deal with something like this? How did a person cope with it? Remy’s easy acceptance seemed to elude Spencer. Too many things had happened at once and even his high powered brain was having a hard time coping with it all. This was so much to take in! Closing his eyes, he drew in a slightly shaky breath. “I don’t know what to think or feel about all of this. I don’t understand it and I don’t like things I don’t understand. There are so many questions I have and I don’t know the answer to any of them.” And God, that set him on edge. He wasn’t used to not having answers to things.

Warmth and reassurance flowed over the bond. “So we’ll figure dem out. We’ll experiment with t’ings until we know what we need to and our limits and t’ings like dat.”

“And what about after?” He snuck a glance up at Remy’s face. “What about when the leave Hotch got me is over and I have to report back to work? We know nothing about how this works. How far apart can we safely get? How is this going to affect us in tense situations? Are we going to be able to handle living in separate cities? Separate _states_?”

The look Remy gave him was both strong and gentle, matching his emotions. “One step at a time, _mon ami_. We just gotta take dis one step at a time. Fo’ tonight, rest might just be de best plan.” Stepping forward, Remy put a hand on Spencer's arm, tipping his sunglasses down to catch Spencer's eyes. “Tomorrow’s soon enough fo’ us to start stressing and getting into de meat of dis. Fo’ tonight, we’re both beat an we aint gon’ be t’inking clearly. It’s been a long day and we could both use de rest.”

Somehow Spencer found himself calmer than before. Remy’s words and emotions coupled with the kind touch was enough to take Spencer's worry and taper it down. Add in that peaceful feeling that was flowing over this bond and there was no way Spencer could stay tense. He sighed and finally unclenched his hands. Seeing that, Remy patted his arm. “Dere y’ go. Y’ jus’ go on an get some rest, _mon ami_. Remy’s room is just on de other side of dis wall here, so if y’ need anyt’ing, don’t be afraid to come knock, _d’accord_? Gon’ go burn off some energy sparrin’ wit’ Wolvie fo’ a bit an den head on in t’ bed.”

“Okay.” Much as he tried to resist, Spencer couldn’t help but reach out when Remy started to go past him. His touch was light on Remy’s arm yet it stopped the Cajun in his tracks. Spencer mustered up a small smile, reminding himself that Logan was right, he wasn’t alone in this. Remy was right there beside him and it wasn’t his fault, what was going on. There was no call to take out what he was feeling on him. Remy was being beyond nice to him and he deserved to at least have that acknowledged. “Thank you.”

He was rewarded by a blazingly bright smile that perfectly matched the happiness that swelled inside the man. “Y’r welcome, cher.”

When the door was shut and Remy was gone, Spencer let out a slow breath. His mind was still racing from here to there and he knew he needed to get his thoughts in order if he was ever going to get any sleep. First things first, though. He went to his go bag and dug around inside until he found his bathroom things. Then he carried them over and set them on the counter inside the bathroom. A part of him admired the niceness of his room and the attached bathroom and he definitely appreciated the kindness that had granted him this extra bit of privacy. He just didn’t have enough space in his head to truly think on it. A room was a room. It wasn’t important in the grand scheme of things right now. Spencer had other things to focus on that were far more important.

Once he’d taken care of his basic needs and had changed into the comfortable sweats and shirt he usually slept in, he settled himself down onto the queen sized bed that dominated one wall. He didn’t lie down to sleep, though. There was too much racing through his mind right now. Sleep was going to be extremely hard to come by. Instead, he settled himself down cross legged and set about doing something that he’d learned to do the year his powers had manifested—meditation. It was simple for him to put himself into the lotus position and get his body settled in. The physical position itself had never been difficult. Being still and calm enough to actually manage to meditate was always his issue. Some days he still had trouble with it. But he’d never found anything better to help with processing all the stray emotions that he picked up in a day. This was an end of day ritual for him that helped him to keep his peace of mind. It helped him keep himself separate from the emotions that could slip in. It also helped him to think.

One would think that the first thing that he would focus on would be the bond itself. Surprisingly, that wasn’t what cropped up in Spencer's mind first. What came first was his empathy itself. He drew in a deep breath and slowly, carefully, extended his empathy around him while still keeping his shield around his mind. It kept his own mind safe while letting him feel the world around him. This was a great way to stretch his mind when he’d spent too long being tightly shielded, which could give him a headache. It also allowed him to actually look at his own strength. That was his goal right now. He needed to see just how much stronger his empathy was compared to before. Back at the hotel, he’d noted that it was stronger and that his usual shields weren’t covering him the way they should. Now, as he opened himself up and reached out, he could see that he was right. His empathy _was_ stronger. He felt shock as he realized that his distance was at least twice what he could usually reach out to and he picked up even more than normal. He almost lost his center in that shock and fought to breathe steadily and keep himself controlled. He didn’t focus on any one person, not even to catalog them in his mind. Instead, he just let them all be a buzz on the edge of his awareness.

The energy in the world around him was stronger than he’d ever felt it before. Only, it was different, too. Before, Spencer had always thought of this ‘energy’ as just a part of the world. He’d figured that it was some kind of emotional energy since emotions were what his mutation dealt with. The sense of it had just been vague and undefined, something that he never really let himself look at. Now, it was almost as bright in his mind as his empathy had been before this growth. It wasn’t energy in the world around him that he was feeling. No, this energy wasn’t the world. It was _people_. He could see that now. The energy wasn’t just floating aimlessly around like he had thought. It was centered inside of every person. It was in him, too. Everyone carried it. One of those lights was brighter than the others, warmer, and he didn’t have to focus on it to know who it was. Something inside of him had already come to recognize that feel as Remy.

So this bond, whatever it was, had caused a surge in his powers. He sensed more around him, felt more. It also called to him more. What would happen if he let himself touch it? If he let himself draw it in? He’d never been brave enough to test that before, which he realized was a good thing. If this energy was a part of a person, then him drawing on it would essentially drain it from that person. The idea of doing that without knowing what he was doing was enough to make Spencer shudder. He almost lost his grip on his control. He had to let go of those thoughts and spend a few minutes simply breathing before he settled back down once more.

Spencer let all of it go for the moment, letting it drift away. He needed to empty himself and calm before he did what needed to be done next. Breathing deeply, he let go and sought out the peace he knew he could find.

CXCX

Down in the Danger Room, someone else was feeling that peace right along with him. Remy felt Spencer's peace and calm leak out of the bond and into him as he circled around Logan, his Bo staff held at the ready. They’d just set up to start sparring when he’d felt those emotions start in Spencer. Vaguely, he wondered what the young man was doing that created this peace in him. Whatever it was, he was glad for it. It eased some of his own tension to know that Spencer was so relaxed. He let that inner calm fill him and found himself moving easier and faster through his moves as he and Logan sparred.

When the two finally quit, they’d worked up a good sweat and Remy knew he was sporting a few new bruises, but he felt a hell of a lot better than when he started.

It must’ve been visible on his face. Logan pulled his shirt off over his head and was wiping the sweat off his face, watching Remy curiously. “Sure look like you’re doing better.”

“ _Oui_.” Sometimes the simple answers were the best.

Together, the two made their way out of the Danger Room. By mutual agreement, they bypassed the locker rooms and just opted to head outside for a smoke instead. Neither one said anything until they were settled down outside. Remy gave a quick internal check as he lit his cigarette. He found Spencer still showing that same calm as before and he relaxed again. All was still well there. When he opened his eyes again, he found Logan watching him. “The kid doin’ okay?” He asked, puffing his cigar to life.

Humor curved the corners of Remy’s mouth. “ _Oui._ How’d y’ guess?”

“You got that look that Chuck or Jeannie gets when they’re talkin’ to someone. You didn’t go rushin’ off, so I figured the pup’s doin’ fine.”

“Real fine.” Pausing, Remy took a drag off his cigarette and thought for a moment, making a few connections in his mind. “T’ink he might be meditatin’. He’s got dat calmness like what y’ get when y’r meditatin’.”

Logan’s eyebrows went up and his expression was one of someone who just figured something out. At the curious look Remy gave, he shrugged and said “Make sense. I thought you were fightin’ different tonight. You weren’t anywhere near as crazy as I thought you were gonna be. You…centered, I guess. Not a lot of fighters can do it.”

Huh, interesting. He could appreciate that he had been calmer and had fought better than he normally did. At the same time, though, he wasn’t sure he liked finding out that he didn’t just feel Spencer's emotions. Apparently he was influenced by them as well. How far was that going to go? Was he going to be happy when the guy was happy, sad when he was sad? Earlier, the temper that he’d felt, was that because he was angry or because Spencer had been angry and it leaked over? Or was it the other way around? Had he been angry and that was why Spencer had gone off the way he had? Hell.

“What is it?”

The gruff sound of Logan’s voice had Remy looking up at him in confusion, still half in his annoyed thoughts. “Huh?”

“You’re sulkin’.” Logan said. He flicked some ash and fixed Remy with a firm stare. “What is it?”

“Jus’ tryin’ t’ figure some t’ings out, Wolvie, dat’s all.” Flicking his own ash, Remy settled in against the wall, crossing his feet at the ankle. “Tryin’ t’ figure out just how tightly we’re wound t’gether, y’know? We aint just feelin’ one another. He’s calm, so Remy’s calm. He was angry and Remy was angry. Was we angry cause dat’s how we felt, or cause dat’s how de other felt?”

“Hell if I know, Cajun. I aint no spook.”

“ _Je sais._ Jus’ worryin, me. Dat’s all. An y’r awfully easy t’ talk wit’.”

Mock grumbling, Logan shot him a glare that didn’t really carry any heat. “What am I, Mother Confessor tonight? First Stretch, now you.”

The familiar devilish humor lit Remy’s face. “Dunno, _mon ami_. Y’ might look in’erestin’ in a nun’s habit.”

Laughing, Remy dodged the blow to his head and popped back up safely a little further away. Logan growled and glared at him. Then he sighed. “Ah, hell. There aint no point in stressing about this shit right now, Gumbo. What’s done is done. Tryin’ to figure it all out tonight aint gonna do nothing but make your head hurt. Go upstairs, wash off the sweat, get some sleep, and the shit’s still gonna be there waiting in the morning. You can deal with it then.”

That sounded like a good plan and almost exactly like what he’d told Spencer earlier. Just, a little gruffer than he’d said it. Remy smiled at his friend. Charging his cigarette butt, he flicked it into the air where it exploded with a small pop. “ _D’accord, mon ami. Merci_ fo y’r help _. Bonne nuit_!”

Remy took Logan’s advice and grabbed a quick shower before he headed off to bed. When he got into his room wrapped in just a towel, the first thing he found himself doing before he’d even finished shutting the door was opening himself up to check on Spencer once more. For the first time he realized just how many times he’d done that tonight. He’d been doing it without even realizing it. Just a quick internal check to make sure that Spencer was still okay. Still…unharmed. He could check not just Spencer's emotions but his general wellbeing as well.

He could tell that the man wasn’t meditating anymore. Sometime during Remy’s shower he had settled down as if to go to bed, but Remy had felt a bit of restlessness that usually came with insomnia. Remy recognized that feeling. He’d felt it himself countless times before. That sensation that there was something tugging at you, something that made it almost impossible to really rest at all. It just nagged at you and kept you awake. That feeling was fading now, though. He didn’t stop to think how Spencer's restlessness had started to fade the closer that Remy got.

What he did notice was his own restlessness. There was this urge in him that he kept trying to shove down. It was trying to tell him to go next door and check on Spencer again, make sure he really was okay. That everything was fine. The protective part of him was getting a little stronger. It was asking him how he was going to be able to keep the other man safe if he was here and Spencer was in there. How would he be able to watch out for him if they were sleeping separated like this? By the time he woke up and responded to anything, it could already be too late. It didn’t matter that they were in the mansion and Remy knew that they were safe. All that part of him seemed to care about was that they were apart and it was going to be that much harder for him to take care of the other man.

Remy fought it for a while. He sat in his room and battled against this urge to go over there. But after a few hours of feeling his restlessness and feeling it ride over the bond to Spencer, making the other man’s sleep restless, he’d had enough. Fuck this. There was one simple solution to all of this. He yanked on a pair of sweats and a tank top and then grabbed his quilt off the bed. The thief silently ghosted out of his room and then used his stealth to slip into Spencer's room. Even in the dark, he could still see well enough to see that Spencer was curled up against the head of the bed, which was pressed up against the wall that separated their rooms. Looked like he was having just as much of an issue as Remy had been.

Still moving silently, Remy made his way across the room and straight to the bed. He stared down at the sleeping form and debated how to do this. Then he shrugged one shoulder and treated it just like he did when he slipped into bed with his Stormy. He lifted up the edge of the blankets and moved them over enough that he could slide onto the bed. His own quilt was tossed over top of the both of them. A yawn slipped free. Remy snuggled down into the bed and blankets and resisted the urge to sigh as that restless feeling went away and the protective part of him gave a happy little hum of contentment. There, this was perfect. His partner was right behind him, asleep and safe, and anything that came in would have to come past Remy to get to him.

As he drifted off to sleep, he felt Spencer roll over and snuggle up against his back. A soft little purr rumbled in Remy’s chest. He fell asleep with a small smile on his lips.


	6. Chapter 6

The first thing that Spencer noticed when he woke was that he was most pleasantly warm. Not only warm, but comfortable. Without thought he burrowed more against that warmth until he found the perfect spot. The last thing he wanted to do was get out of bed. Apparently he’d slept the night through without nightmares, something that was rare for him, and he felt wonderful. His mind was warm and hazy and his body felt relaxed and heavy. He could easily drift back to sleep and he sighed with contentment. It was when that warmth under him gave a husky chuckle that Spencer’s brain woke up enough to realize that the warmth wasn’t a some _thing_ , but a some _one_.

Spencer had never moved out of bed so fast. He shot off of the person, almost flinging himself away. Only, the blankets were around them both and Spencer found himself tangled in them. Instead of leaping out of the bed as he’d been trying, he got caught up with the blankets and suddenly found himself going over the edge of the bed. Hands reached for him, trying to catch him, but the blankets tugged on him as well and the two men went tumbling right out of bed, landing on the floor with a solid thud. Spencer found himself pinned down by a solid weight. His panic climbed higher. Not even fully thinking, he started pushing and shoving, trying to pull himself free. His frantic struggles only served to further tangle them. “Get off, get off!” He shoved, pushing to get himself free.

All of a sudden the blankets moved just enough that he was able to pull himself out. Immediately he scrambled back and grabbed the foot of the bed, yanking himself to his feet. He didn’t hesitate to plunge a hand into his messenger bag, which was hanging off the bedpost. He came back out with his gun in hand. “Don’t move!”

The room fell silent as the figure in the blankets froze. “Woah dere.” The figure rose up from the ground and Spencer got his first clear look at him. Remy stood with his hands held out on either side of his head. A calming sensation slid over the bond to Spencer and Remy’s voice dropped down to a low, soothing murmur. “It’s just Remy, cher.”

Remy? Some of Spencer's panic faded away as his brain caught up with the rest of him. “Remy?”

“Dat’s right, Spencer. It’s just Remy. Y’r safe here; everyt’ings okay. Just lower de gun, yeah?”

Spencer looked down at the gun he was holding and quickly lowered it down to his side. His eyes shot back up to Remy again. A temper that Spencer rarely ever let show now gripped him as the whole situation came into focus. “Are you absolutely insane?” He demanded furiously. “I could’ve shot you!”

With a relieved sigh now that the gun was no longer pointed at him, Remy dropped his hands down to his sides. “ _Non merci_ , been shot enough lately, me. Aint really lookin’ fo another.”

“This isn’t funny! What on earth were you doing in here? In _my bed_?”

Remy bent down and scooped the blankets up off the floor. “Neither one of us was sleepin’ well last night. Remy was restless and so was y’. It went away de closer we got. So, Remy figured he might as well get real close and let de bot’ of us sleep a lil, _oui_?” He tossed the sheet onto the bed first and set the rest off to the side in a pile.

How on earth could he be discussing this so calmly? Spencer couldn’t believe it. He stood there and stared, still clutching his gun in his hands. His grip was tight enough that his hands actually shook a little. Residual panic was still in him, fueling his temper even more. His voice rose slightly with that anger. “How dare you sneak in here? Who gave you that right?”

“Y’ rather spend de whole night tossin’ an turnin’?” Remy asked him, snapping the sheet out over the bed. He was making the bed like this was the most natural and normal thing in the world. Like he hadn’t just snuck into Spencer's room last night and climbed into bed with him without asking. “Could feel how restless y’ was and Remy weren’t no better. Tried holdin’ back, _mais_ it just got worse and worse, like dis endless circle. De more restless y’ got, de more restless Remy got, which just seemed t’ make y’ more restless. Just kept goin’ round and round. What else was Remy suppose t’ do?”

Spencer recognized that what Remy was saying was making sense. He could see that. That didn’t make it okay, though. It dulled Spencer's temper but it didn’t take it away. “You could’ve knocked.” He saw Remy look up with surprise and he snorted. “What? Didn’t that even occur to you?”

“Honestly? _Non_.” Remy reached out for the comforter, pulling it up to the bed next. He slanted a look through his hair at Spencer. “Would y’ have said _oui_?”

“Probably.” Again, his answer earned him a look of surprise. This one irritated him. “Just because I’m displeased at waking up to find you in my bed doesn’t mean that I don’t understand your reason why. I’m not stupid, nor am I so thick headed that I can’t admit that it was the smart thing to do. If our emotions were looping that badly and the only thing that eased it was close proximity, then of course I would’ve allowed you to sleep in here. What I cannot stand, what absolutely infuriates me, is that you had the sheer audacity to slip into my room and climb into my bed without a by-your-leave. We may be bonded but that does not give you those kinds of rights.”

All of a sudden Remy went still. His head canted to the side and Spencer felt a sort of presence at the edge of their shielding. He actually felt as Remy lowered his shields just enough to let that presence in. It wasn’t hard for Spencer to recognize the touch for who it was; Charles. He was only there for a moment and then he was gone again and their shielding was firmly back in place. Remy’s eyes focused once more and he looked at Spencer. “Dat was Charles. He wants us t’ meet him down in his office in bout fifteen minutes.”

Perfect. A step back from this conversation was exactly what they both needed. Spencer nodded his head. With moves far calmer than he actually felt, he went to his bag and put his gun inside. Then he grabbed himself a clean pair of clothes. “I’m going to clean up. I’ll meet you out in the hall in ten minutes?” He kept his voice cool and cordial.

“ _D’accord_.”

Nodding, the young genius headed to his bathroom. He was almost all the way through the door when Remy suddenly called out “Who was it?”

Stopping, Spencer turned and look at him. “Excuse me?”

The Cajun smoothed out the last of the blankets. Then he lifted his gaze to Spencer. There was something in it that held the young genius in place. A seriousness that was tempered by the concern he was radiating. “Most people, dey might panic if dey wake up wit’ someone in deir bed. Scream, maybe t’row a punch. _Mais_ y’, y’ filled wit’ sheer panic an went straight fo’ y’r gun. Dat tells Remy dis aint de first time y’ woke up wit’ someone in y’r bed, an de last time it happened, it didn’t go over so well. So, who was it?”

His calm steady words hit Spencer harder than if he had shouted them. Old memories shoved their way forward. Remembered fear buzzed through him and he had to fight to shove it back down. Because of that, his voice was just slightly strained. “That is absolutely none of your business.” He gathered himself and turned his back on Remy. The bathroom door shut behind him with a soft click that echoed loudly through the room.

CXCX

Almost ten minutes exactly passed before the two met in the hallway. Each one had taken the time to dress and to compose themselves. Spencer had also taken the time to calm himself as well. He didn’t do anger well and he didn’t like the guilty feeling that was leaking over from Remy. Though he couldn’t read Remy’s thoughts, it wasn’t hard to read his emotions. The man still felt that he’d done right but he was feeling guilty about it nonetheless. Most likely because of how much it had upset Spencer.

The more Spencer thought about things, the less angry he became. So far Remy had shown a strong protective instinct where it came to Spencer. He was defensive when Spencer was hurt or scared and had acted each time in a way to protect him. This protectiveness seemed to be almost a compulsion in him. A need that didn’t go away. Though Remy hadn’t said it, Spencer was willing to bet that his protectiveness had something to do with him coming in last night as well. How could he be mad at Remy for that? Especially when he stopped and acknowledged that he’d had the best night of sleep that he’d had in a very long time.

Spencer found Remy waiting for him in the hallway when he stepped out of his room. One look at the man patiently waiting there, no hint of anger in him even though he should at least be upset at having a gun pulled on him, and the last part of Spencer's temper faded away. A hint of shame took its place. He reached out when he got close and laid a hesitant hand on Remy’s arm. “I’m sorry.”

“Y’ aint got not’ing t’ be sorry fo’.” Remy reached up and patted Spencer's hand, smiling kindly at him. “It’s Remy dat should be sayin’ sorry. Y’r right. Knockin’ would’ve been de right t’ing t’ do. Dere was no call fo’ scarin’ y’ like dat.”

That bit of shame grew and he flushed ever so slightly, dropping his eyes down and away. “None of it was any call for me pulling a gun on you. I apologize sincerely for that, Remy. I just…I’m jumpy in my sleep.”

“Remy’ll remember dat fo’ de future.” He lifted one hand and caught Spencer's chin between finger and thumb. Tipping his face up, Remy caught his eyes. “ _Désolé_ , Spencer. It won’t happen again.”

“Thank you.”

Neither said another word on it. Spencer curled his fingers against Remy’s arm for a moment longer. Then he dropped his hand and slipped it down into his pocket. It took control, but he kept his hands to himself as they made their way downstairs. A few moments later found them seated in a rather nice office. They were settled in off to the side of the room, with Spencer and Remy sitting on a couch and Charles in his char facing them. No one else was in the room with them at the moment. On the coffee table between them sat a service tray with coffee and mugs. Remy took to serving that while Charles started speaking. “I thought that we might talk alone at first. Things were rather hectic yesterday and I thought this might give us a chance to discuss things in a more relaxed setting, without everyone watching on.”

“What is it you’re looking to discuss, sir?” Spencer asked. He accepted the cup that Remy offered him and busied his hands with preparing it the way he liked.

Charles took the cup he was handed, too, and sat back in his chair with it. “First of all, how are the two of you this morning? How did your night go?”

The two men exchanged a quick look. Spencer's lips quirked up briefly and then his expression turned neutral once more. “Fine, sir. While I admit that I was more uncomfortable the further away from me that Remy was, we managed to handle things well enough.”

“And you, Remy? You were the one shot yesterday, after all. How are you?”

“ _Bien, merci_.” Carrying his own mug, Remy settled back onto the couch at Spencer's side. He kept a bit of a gap between them in an effort to respect his personal space. Still, his body turned slightly, facing towards Spencer almost unconsciously. “Dere don’t seem t’ be no leftover problems from dat. Whatever happened t’ heal Remy did a damn fine job.”

Charles nodded his head and his eyes flickered over to Spencer. “That brings me to the next subject. I need to ask, Dr. Reid. Is this healing ability something that you possessed before?”

“No.” Spencer shook his head.

“While I was looking at the link, I saw the memories connected with it. I saw what your empathy did as the bond was made. It wasn’t the power from your bond that did the healing. You did. Your empathy flowed into your hand like it had its own energy and the healing poured from there.”

That just confirmed what Spencer was thinking. He curled his hands around his mug and leaned forward a little, processing what Charles said. “That matches with what I was thinking.” He said slowly. “You see, last night, while I was meditating…” In simple terms, Spencer walked them both through what he’d learned about his powers growing. He told them about his empathy strength increasing and about his sense of the energy around him and how he was so sure he could use it. “I don’t know how I’m so sure. I don’t even know how it is I did what I did when I healed Remy. I am a man of science, Professor. I’ve spent my career dissecting people and their actions and finding the motive behind it all. Yet the only thing I can say for this is that it feels like…like instinct. Like the knowledge was already there, buried in this part of my mind that was opened during our bonding. Like it’s always been there. Just, now, I can access it. At least, I think. I haven’t been able to test it yet.”

“I’d like you to spend some time with Hank in the Med Lab today to test this. This is something that should be tested in a controlled setting.” Charles said.

“Of course.”

“Have you noticed any changes, Remy? Any change at all in your powers, or any additions to them?”

The Cajun shook his head. He settled back against the couch, one arm going up to rest on the back of it while his other hand balanced his mug on his knee. His whole pose was deliberately casual. “ _Non_ , _monsieur_. Remy’s powers all seem t’ be de same. Aint not’ing different, cept fo’ de t’ings we already talked about last night. Did y’ get ahold of de _ami_ y’ said y’ was gonna call?”

The abrupt switch in topic threw Spencer more a moment. His head jerked towards Charles. A friend? Charles was going to contact a friend about this? Was there someone that he thought might know what was going on?

“I have.” Charles said. “I spoke with her before bed last night. While she has no information for me right now, she is going to ask around with some people that she thinks might at least have an idea of where to start our search. Like me, she thinks that this sounds like something she may have heard before. She’s just not sure what it is. When she finds anything, she’ll get back to me. In the meantime, I’d like both of your permission to try and take another look at your memories of the event. I’m hoping that we can see something else that might give us more of a clue as to what’s going on. I’d also like to try and look a little deeper; maybe follow the bond to those places that I was blocked from last night. They might be able to give us some kind of answer.”

The two men reacted at the same time. They leaned in towards each other just the slightest bit and Remy shook his head ‘no’ even as Spencer shook his and said “I’m sorry, but no.”

The firmness with which he said that startled those around him. Charles gave him a surprised look. “Have I done something to earn your distrust, Dr. Reid?”

“Not so far, sir, no.”

“Then why such a strong response?”

“Because I’m not fond of having a telepath inside my mind unless absolutely necessary.” Spencer said simply. Not to mention that there were things he knew that no one in this house had the security clearance to even know existed, let alone know the details that he did. “I’m sorry, Professor, but we’re going to have to work with what we have. I’m willing to submit to tests to help us understand this, within reason, but I don’t think you strolling through our minds is going to bring us any sort of answer.”

“Our time’s better spent tryin’ t’ figure dis out.” Remy added in. He learned forward, setting his half empty cup on the table. “We need t’ test t’ings. How far apart can we get? Neither one of us seems t’ like de idea of being apart. How far is too far? Dat’s one of de first t’ings Remy t’inks we need t’ test.”

Spencer nodded his agreement. “One of us should stay here at the house while another gradually leaves. If there were a telepath with each of us, it would allow us to be monitored while maintaining contact with the other person. That way, we can see not only how far apart we’re capable of getting, but what happens when we’re separated this way.”

There was no doubt that the conversation of stepping into their minds was now closed. Charles caught that clearly and knew better than to press it. Instead, he focused on the idea the two had given. It was a smart one and it was one of the things that he’d wanted to have tested today anyways. “That sounds like a good idea. I can call Jean in and she can go with one of you. Maybe Logan as well, just in case something happens. We have no idea of the risks we’re taking here, so we need to be prepared for any eventuality.”

“Y’ should have Henri up here. If we’re so tied t’gether, dere’s no tellin’ if dis is gonna cause a physical reaction.” Remy suggested.

Charles looked surprised that it was Remy who suggested that. Spencer filed that little bit of information away in the back of his mind. What was surprising about Remy being open to potential medical assistance? Was he not fond of doctors? Or of Hank himself? It was worth thinking about later. For now, Spencer just filed it away.

Things were put together pretty quickly once they had their plan in place. It only took about ten minutes before everyone needed was gathered in Charles’ office. It was quickly decided that Spencer was the one to leave while Remy stayed here with Charles and Hank. While Spencer was nervous about the idea, visibly so, there was no doubt that Remy wasn’t pleased with it all despite him being the one to have suggested it to begin with. His agitation was easy for Spencer to feel. It grew stronger when Spencer left the room with Jean and Logan.

They passed by no one in the hallway, which was a blessing. Spencer had yet to meet anyone else in the house and he wasn’t quite sure he wanted to yet. Though it was beginning to look like he was going to be here for a while. Getting to know all the residents would probably be a good idea. Just, not yet. He had enough on his plate as it was. The last thing he wanted to do was add more stress, and meeting new people was always stressful for him. How much more stressful was it going to be with an overprotective Remy at his shoulder? Because something told him that Remy would be just that when the time came; a hovering, overprotective nuisance.

Spencer and Jean settled down into the backseat of one of the cars while Logan slid into the front. This was the easiest way to test their distance. Logan started the car and slowly drove them down the driveway.

“How’re you doing, Spencer?” Jean asked. She’d turned in her seat and was watching him carefully.

Licking his lips, Spencer folded his hands in his lap and tried to be still. His first urge was to say ‘fine’ the way that he always did when someone asked. But this wasn’t about his feelings. This was a scientific experiment and there was no room for covering things up here. They needed accurate data to be able to properly analyze this. Thinking about it in scientific terms allowed him just a small amount of distance and a slight feeling of control. “Slightly nauseous, actually. And a small increase in anxiety. I have the urge to turn back to the house for him.” Pausing, he cocked his head. “Remy’s not too pleased, either. He’s agitated as well. Also, he’s annoyed, and growing more so.” He wanted to soothe that agitation. He tried to calm himself, to center as he might when meditating, and he worked to send some of that calm down the bond to Remy in hopes that it would help.

CXCX

Remy stood by the window of the office, his eyes watching the car slowly travel down the drive. His fingers twitched against his leg. _Dieu_ , but he could use a cigarette right now. Something to just steady him a little bit. As if in response, he felt Spencer send him a wave of calm. A small, weak one, yet it was enough to steady him just slightly. Just in time, too. Hank moved up beside him and took hold of his wrist, checking his pulse. Remy bit his lip and resigned himself to the small exam. This needed to be done. Hank was here to help. Remy endured it, not because he was concerned about his reaction, but because he and Spencer were so tied together, maybe Hank monitoring him would help him know if something might happen to Spencer, too.

“How are you doing, Remy?” Hank asked.

“ _Bien_.” Remy shrugged one shoulder.

Charles brought his chair just a little closer to the two. “Remy, we need as accurate of a description as you can give us to what you feel. All information right now is important.”

He flashed a quick look over at Hank and then Charles before looking back out at the road. Damn them. He was right, Remy knew. It didn’t mean he had to like it, though. “Feel…itchy.”

“Itchy?”

“ _Oui_. Like dere’s somet’ing important dat Remy should be doin’ dat he aint.” He blew out a breath and brought his hands up to rub at his arms. His body was tensing, though he didn’t see it. “It feels wrong t’ watch him go. Just…wrong.” He fought back his urges. The protective part of him was starting to grow antsy. The further away Spencer got, the worse it became.

CXCX

They’d reached the gate by now. The sick feeling was stronger and Spencer had a hand pressed to his stomach. His anxiety was growing worse, too. Spencer closed his eyes and tried to focus on his breathing. This sensation, it was strange, yet it reminded him of something. Where had he felt this before?

IT came to him in a flash of insight that left him staring, stunned. He didn’t notice Jean watching him with worry. Holy shit. He knew what this felt like. The shaky hands, the nausea, the growing headache, this anxious feeling, and now this crawling sensation along his skin—withdrawals. He’d felt like this when he’d quit the Dilaudid. His body was going through withdrawals like an addict denied his drug.

“Dr. Reid? Dr. Reid, what is it?”

That explained a few things. The ramifications of it were staggering.

Spencer was distracted completely from those thoughts by something far, far more important. His shields. As they got further away, he felt his shields start to waver. Then, to his horror, he felt them start to come down, the strength draining right out of them.

CXCX

Charles and Hank watched as Remy’s body grew more and more tense. He had stopped sitting at the window and had taken to pacing the floor. The two men watched with curiosity and amazement. They’d seen Remy’s grace and deadliness before, both in training and in battle. They’d seen a dangerous side of him out on missions when things got serious. But neither man had ever seen anything quite like this. Remy wasn’t just pacing, he was _stalking_ back and forth. His lip curled up in an almost-snarl. With each moment that passed, he grew more and more agitated. His eyes were sharper, harder.

All of a sudden he froze in place and his head snapped up. Unerringly, his eyes went to the wall, as if he could see straight through to where Spencer was. “His shields.” Remy said lowly. “His shields are fallin’.”

Just as Jean’s mind voice reached out to Charles, Remy flew into motion. He shot out of the room and was gone before anyone could say a word.

CXCX

No, no, no, no! Spencer curled in on himself, his hands cradling his head. No! He pressed as far into the corner of the car as he could get. When Jean tried to move towards him, he gave a low cry and pressed even more against the door. The pressure of her emotions against his failing shields was almost too much for him. Oh, God! What was happening? Why were his shields falling apart? They’d been perfectly fine before he left the house! Could they really be that tied in to Remy? Spencer didn’t know. At the moment, he didn’t care. All he cared about was that they were falling.

“Hang in there, Stretch.” Logan called back to him. “I’m turnin’ us around. We’re going back. Just hang on.”

Spencer tightened his hands in his hair as his head started to pound. “Hurry.” He said between clenched teeth. In his mind, he focused on the feeling of Remy. He almost cried out in relief as he felt that sensation start getting closer. Remy’s protectiveness and caring reached out, warm and bright, wrapping around him and cushioning him. A bit of strength was fed his way, too. It wasn’t much but it was enough to hold him.

All of a sudden Logan gave a low shout and the car jerked as he slammed on the brakes. Spencer slammed into the seat in front of him and bounced backwards. “Dammit!” Logan shouted out furiously. “What the hell is he doing?”

A second later, the light of Remy burned even closer and then Spencer's door was jerked open. He didn’t even think about it as fell out the door and right into a pair of arms. He didn’t pull away from them as he usually might’ve. The feel of Remy’s touch blazed through him. It chased away some of the ache and gave him the strength to hold up what little bit of his shields were left. “Remy’s got y’, cher. It’s okay. Remy’s got y’.” The warm murmur came from right by his ear. Spencer found himself clinging to the solid body that held him. When they started to move, he followed the softly murmured directions. “Jus’ take a step, dere y’ go, jus’ like dat. Left, right, left, right. Dere y’ go.”

“Remy, what are you doing?” Jean demanded somewhere behind them.

Her worry battered at Spencer and he pressed in a little closer to Remy. In response, Remy quickened there steps. Then he was shifting his grip on Spencer and moving him. “Remy needs y’ t’ move, cher. Jus’ sit down here. We’re gonna get y’ outta here.”

Pushing past everything, past the headache, past the fight with his shields, Spencer made himself open his eyes and actually look. He and Remy were standing right by a motorcycle, one that Remy was sinking down on to. He was tugging gently yet firmly on Spencer's arms and there was no doubt what it was he wanted. Spencer debated only for a second. But the safety and security he’d found in Remy’s touch were too strong a call. Though Jean was still calling to them, Spencer ignored it all and lowered himself down to straddle the bike behind Remy. He briefly gave thanks that he’d ridden before. He got situated easily and wrapped his arms around Remy’s waist. Remy grabbed his hands, forcing his grip a little tighter, and then he was letting go and grabbing the handles. Spencer buried his head against Remy’s back while the bike roared to life.

The last thing he saw before they tore out of there was Jean’s shocked expression. Then they were racing down the road, away from the mansion, and Spencer focused only on the body in front of him. His arms were clenched tightly around Remy’s waist and his face was buried against his back. He was firmly nestled against the back of the man and in that moment, it was perfect. He didn’t know where they were going and he just didn’t care. Even when the road changed under them, becoming a little rougher, he still didn’t care. All he cared about was that Remy was here and something about the man’s presence was making the pain go away. His shields were rebuilding, too. Slowly but steadily.

The bike slowed down and finally came to a stop. When it did, Spencer didn’t let go. Remy didn’t make him, either. With firm, steady movements, he drew them both off of the bike without ever fully breaking contact. Spencer was loathe to let go of the one thing that felt stable and safe in the world at the moment. He let himself be led away from the bike. After only a few steps, they stopped. Spencer opened his eyes and saw that they were by a picnic table. Remy drew them both down to sit on the table top. Then he shifted his arms and gathered Spencer up right against his chest. His movements were slow, giving Spencer plenty of time to pull away if he needed. Spencer surprised himself by _not_ pulling away. In fact, he almost melted into Remy’s embrace.

“Dat’s it. Y’r okay, _mon ami_. Y’r safe here.” Remy stroked a soothing hand over Spencer's hair and held him a little closer.

Burying his face in against Remy’s neck not just for comfort, but to hide his embarrassment at all this, Spencer let out a shaky breath. “What is going on with us?”

“ _Je ne sais pas._ ”

“My shields were crashing. They were almost _gone_ by the time you got there!” Spencer's hands curled into Remy’s jacket. He clutched at him like he was afraid the man would pull away.

Remy kept up his soothing stroking of Spencer's hair, almost like he was petting him. It felt absurdly good. His voice stayed low and soothing, too. That same gentle tone he’d had since he’d showed up by the car. “ _Je sais_. Remy felt it. Dat’s why he came runnin’.”

“This is beyond simply being bonded. Our relationship is almost symbiotic. Physically, our bodies couldn’t stand the distance. I went through symptoms similar to that of withdrawal.” Spencer turned his head in a little more, not noticing that he was nuzzling at Remy’s neck. He did, however, note just how soothing the skin to skin contact was, even more than the regular contact.

He wasn’t the only one to notice it. “We figured out b’fore dat touchin’ was a big t’ing, _mais_ it looks like it’s more important dan we t’ought. De more we touch, de stronger y’r shield’s gettin’.”

“So what does this mean? I can’t go anywhere without you unless I’m willing to lose my shields and get completely sick?”

“Fo’ now, maybe. Maybe it’s like dis cause we’re so fresh in it. We’ve only been bonded dis way fo’ a day, cher. Our bodies might just need time t’ adjust, _oui_? Or it could get easier wit’ practice. We just don’t know yet.” He paused and gave Spencer a small, reassuring squeeze. “We’ll get dis figured out, Spencer. Fo’ now, just relax here and get y’rself back in control. Remy’s got y’ and he aint gonna let not’ing happen t’ y’. Y’r safe here.”


	7. Chapter 7

It took almost an hour before the two men finally returned to the mansion. Spencer's shields were back in order and that sick feeling was long gone by now. When they returned, they were both in control once more. Still, Remy kept close to Spencer's side when they made their way in and he looked very much on alert, as if watching for trouble. Spencer chose not to comment on it. He had a feeling it would gain him nothing. He was smart enough to know when to pick his battles, anyways, and this was one that wasn’t even worth trying to fight. Besides, it didn’t really bother him. Even when they entered Charles’s office and Remy immediately moved to make sure he stayed between Spencer and everyone else, it wasn’t something bothersome. Spencer could feel Remy’s protectiveness in the bond and knew that the man was only acting on some kind of inner instinct.

Hank came forward as soon as they entered the room. In response, Remy shifted again, slipping ever so slightly in front of Spencer. Reaching up, Spencer lightly touched Remy’s shoulder, drawing his attention. “It’s fine, Remy.” He kept his voice low, his words for Remy’s ears only. “He probably just wants to make sure we’re both fine. We need to let him if we want to understand what’s going on with us.” With just a light touch, he drew Remy back to stand more at his side. The quiet interaction was noted by everyone in the room, though not commented on.

Barely missing a beat, Hank came right up to them and started to examine Spencer first, giving him a basic check over. While he did that, Charles looked to Remy. “Are the two of you all right?” he asked.

“ _Oui,_ Professor.” Remy reassured him. He turned himself a little, keeping up his watch on what Hank was doing while also able to look over at the rest of the room. He tensed the more that Hank touched Spencer until finally he lifted a hand and rested it against the back of Spencer's neck. Almost instantly the two of them relaxed. Calmer, Remy elaborated on his previous answer, giving them the information he knew they needed. “We had t’ take a bit of time t’ get t’ings in order again. Spencer's shields was almost cashed by de time dat Remy got t’ him. He needed time away from people t’ get dem back up again.”

“I think it’s pretty safe to say you two shouldn’t be separated.” Logan said wryly.

Spencer looked up as Hank moved away from him and over to Remy. “That seems like a solid conclusion for the moment. Neither one of us reacted well to being apart.”

“Remy did not seem to have as physical of a reaction, though.” Hank pointed out. He was holding Remy’s wrist in his hand, checking his pulse. “His reaction seemed to be tied into emotion and was more connected to what you were feeling than anything else. It would appear you are the one that gets the physical response.”

Spencer had noticed that too. “My body reacted like it was going into withdrawal. Nausea, shaking, headache, and a creeping, itchy sensation on my skin. It started to get better when I felt Remy coming closer and it eased tremendously when we got into physical contact with one another.”

“The physical contact seems to be important.” Jean said thoughtfully.

Charles nodded his agreement. “I think it might actually be a part of the bond itself. I’ve noticed the two of you touch frequently. I believe that it helps to reinforce and strength it. Keep it alive. The bond itself is like a living thing that has merged with you both and tied you together.”

That matched with what Spencer was noticing. They both craved touch, as they’d said before. But when they did touch, it had an effect on them. Not just a calming one, either. Touching had proved to settle them both and to strengthen them. It had been the skin to skin contact with Remy that had really helped Spencer to strengthen his shields back up. He said as much to the room and watched them absorb the words, adding it to everything else they were learning.

Hank had finished his exam on Remy and he stepped back now, looking the two men over. “You two seem to be in good health. However, I would like to get you down in my lab and give you a thorough physical as well as draw a few blood samples. There may be something in your genetics that I might be able to find to help us explain this.”

“Why don’t the three of you go attend to that?” Charles suggested. “While you do, I’m going to call a meeting with the rest of the house. I think it’s time for us to explain to them what exactly is going on. They all need to know who our new guest is and they need to understand what they’re going to be seeing for a while.”

“Least Rogue aint here right now. Aint none of us gotta deal wit’ dat temper.” Remy said with a laugh.

Spencer watched curiously as everyone in the room laughed at that. Who was Rogue? And why was her temper something of a joke? He filed that away as another thing to ask about later when he and Remy were alone. It was just one of many questions on what was becoming a long list. For now, he just watched as everyone laughed and Charles said “Yes, there is that. I think I may see if her time with Emma can be extended, just until we get a handle on things. It might make it a little easier on us all.”

In no time, the two men were moving again, this time following Hank through the house and down to the labs. They stayed close as they moved and Remy’s hand never fully left Spencer. It moved off his neck, down to the small of his back, and Spencer found himself leaning in to that touch without noticing it. For the most part, he was too busy thinking to really notice what he was doing. His body was running on auto pilot. There was so much new information to process and he was adding it to the other information he had on this bond. There were so many new things going on and so much he didn’t yet understand. How much more was going to be thrown their way?

CXCX

When Hank had said they were going to do physical exams, he hadn’t been kidding around. Spencer found out quickly just how serious Hank was about it. He had them both change into hospital gowns and then he proceeded to put them through every test he possibly could in his lab. They were poked, prodded, scanned and examined from head to toe. Spencer didn’t really have a problem with it. He’d gone through a battery of tests before for different reasons in his life. He was also a scientist and he understood the need to examine something from every which direction. But he quickly discovered that Remy didn’t have that same relaxed air about all of this.

From the minute they came into the lab, Remy was on edge. It only got worse with each thing that they did. His body tensed and his agitation grew by leaps and bounds. Spencer watched him carefully and tried to feed the man as much calm as he could. It didn’t seem to have any effect, though. Things finally came to a head when Hank tried to draw blood. Remy sat still through it as Spencer's blood was drawn. When it came time to draw his, he jerked back on the bed and curled his arms in. “ _Non_. No blood, Henri.”

“My dear friend, you know that I need blood from both of you to test this accurately.” Hank said calmly.

Remy shook his head. “ _Non_.”

It wasn’t just anxiety that Remy felt now. It was fear. That fear had Spencer moving off his bed and finally giving in to the urge to go comfort the man. He slipped off of his bed and over to Remy’s bed. He hitched a hip on the edge of the bed and laid a comforting hand on Remy’s arm. His touch brought a small measure of calm to the man but not much. He still stared at the needle in Hank’s hand like it was a snake that was going to bite him. Spencer rubbed soothingly at Remy’s arm. “Not a fan of needles?”

“Remy hates em.”

An idea came to Spencer and he tipped his head up a little and hesitantly asked, “Would it make you more comfortable if I drew the blood?”

Surprised, Remy looked up at him. Some of the panic in him receded a little. “ _Oui_ , actually.”

“Okay.” Spencer smiled at him before turning to look at Hank. “I’ve worked in lab settings before and this won’t be the first time I’ve drawn blood. Would you mind if I did it for him now?”

It had been a while since Spencer had done this, but it came back easily. While he drew the blood, he made sure to keep in contact with Remy at all times, holding on to him and letting Remy hold his arm in return. That skin to skin seemed to settle Remy enough that, though it didn’t take his fear all the way away, it relaxed him enough for Spencer to quickly and efficiently draw blood. When he was done, he handed it over to Hank and then turned back to Remy, pressing the cotton swab down over the puncture mark. “There. That wasn’t so bad, now was it?”

“Y’r pretty good at dat.” Remy complimented him.

Spencer shrugged one shoulder. “I’ve taken the advanced first aid courses at the academy so I could better assist out in the field.”

Eventually Hank ran out of tests to put them through and the two were allowed to dress once more. It was as they finished dressing that Spencer felt something with his empathy. He caught a flash of pain a little ways away. The feel of it had him stopping and freezing in place. Someone, somewhere nearby was hurt. He didn’t even stop to think about reaching out to try and feel who and where it was. He didn’t notice that Remy was at attention beside him, one hand on his shoulder, or that Hank had stopped to watch them now as well. All his attention was focused outside of the room. He followed the track of pain and knew that it was a woman who was hurt, though he didn’t know her name. She was getting closer, too. Coming to them. Spencer turned towards the doors just moments before they and someone came hurrying in. A pretty young woman with her hand wrapped up in a towel that was already pretty well soaked with blood.

Hank’s attention snapped to her the instant she came in and he moved as soon as he caught sight of the blood. “Betsy! What on earth happened here?”

“Something startled me when I was cutting vegetables and the knife slipped.” The woman said. She allowed Hank to lead her over to one of the tables.

Spencer moved over as well. He was drawn over by her pain, unable to block it out. It filled him and he willingly drew it in to ease her some. He got close just as Hank moved the towel and revealed the large gash on the skin underneath. The knife had cut right across the bottom of her index finger and in towards her palm, splaying her hand open. It was a nasty, deep cut. Spencer saw it and he came even closer. Her pain was calling out to him, to this place inside of him that told him that he could help her. He could ease her pain and help her. He got close to her and the woman looked up at him, her face pale yet curious. “You must be the new guy we were told about. Spencer, right? I’m Betsy.” She gave him a weak smile. “I’d shake your hand but I’m a little busy right now.”

“I can help you.” Spencer blurted out. He stopped right beside her bed, completely ignoring Hank. All of his attention was on her.

“What?” She asked, surprised.

“If you let me, I can help you.” He knew he could. How he knew was a mystery that didn’t really matter at the moment. What mattered was that she was hurting and he could feel it like it was his own pain and he knew he could help her. He _knew_. “Please? Will you let me help?”

Betsy looked down at Hank, who was busy preparing a local to inject into her hand. He gave her a look of his own and, though he never stopped his preparations, he told her “The choice is yours.”

She looked back at Spencer and finally shrugged one shoulder. “Why not? Can’t hurt, right? Go right ahead here, Doctor.”

That was all Spencer needed. He reached out, not even thinking about putting on gloves or about the fact that he was touching a blood covered hand. He just reached his hand out and laid it directly over top of hers. How he knew what to do, he wasn’t sure. He just followed the instinct inside of him and reached out to that energy he could feel, drawing a little from himself and a little from her, and he drew it into the palm of his hand. It poured into his palm and warmed it, making the skin tingle. Spencer focused it into the pain that he felt there and the injury that he could feel like it was his very own and the pain started to diminish almost immediately. He felt it go down, down, until the pain was completely gone. In his mind, he felt the difference and he drew back, slowly releasing the energy. He let go of it and drew his hand carefully back.

Betsy was staring down at her hand with shock. She held it there as Hank used the towel to wipe over her palm. Where the wound had been there was now only a small, slender scar, barely noticeable on her skin. “Holy shit.”

A wave of exhaustion washed through Spencer. He locked his knees, trying to keep them from wobbling, and braced one hand discreetly on the edge of the table to hold himself upright. Remy’s grip shifted from a comforting touch to a bracing one. Spencer relaxed into that grip just slightly and let it support him a bit. He smiled at Betsy and Hank, both of whom were now looking up at him. Betsy’s smile grew in response to his. “Thank you, Doc.”

“Not a problem. I’m really glad I could help.” He was, too. There had really been no other option for him. As soon as he’d felt her pain, the urge to help had kicked in. It hadn’t just been a _want_. It had been a _need_. He’d _needed_ to help her. Really, it hadn’t taken much of his energy, either. On a normal day it probably wouldn’t have bothered him. He was just feeling it a little bit more than he might have because he was tired from having to repair his shields earlier. But Remy’s touch helped him relax and calm. Though, one thing came through rather clearly. The little bit of hunger he’d felt before was now almost tripled. He was ravenous.

Remy must’ve felt it. He gave Spencer a gentle squeeze and started making their excuses to the other two. “Why don’t we leave y’ two down here t’ clean up an such? Remy’s gonna go ahead and take Spencer on up fo’ a bite. We aint had a chance fo’ not’ing more dan coffee t’day, y’know?”

“It was very nice to meet you.” Spencer told Betsy as Remy started to move him away.

“It was nice to meet you too. And, thanks again.” Betsy called back. She looked extremely amused watching Remy slowly but surely steer Spencer out of the room.

When they got out into the hallway, Spencer turned his head enough to give Remy an exasperated look with just a hint of amusement at the edges. “A little pushy?”

“Y’ don’t know M. Bete like Remy does. We stayed in dere any longer and he’d have us in dere all afternoon, breakin’ down what exactly it was y’ did and how y’ did it. De man’s a scientist at heart and he fo’gets sometimes bout de rest of de world when he’s got new information t’ study. Remy just saved us a few hours’ time in de labs, dat’s all.”

Spencer chuckled. He knew what that could be like, though usually he was on the opposite end of that. He was more the type to take new information and really run with it. Analyzing things was what he did. This was all definitely something he was going to look into once he had some downtime. Most likely tonight while he was doing his meditation, he’d take a bit of time to look in himself and examine all of this. For now, he really just wanted something to eat.

CXCX

The rest of the day passed rather quickly for the two men. Charles declared that he didn’t want to do anymore testing today. He wanted the two to have some time to just get to know one another and to get Spencer settled in here. It was a good plan, too. Spencer finally got the chance to meet the other residents and actually put names to faces. It surprised him, just how easy going everyone was about this whole thing. Oh, there were a few who looked suspicious. Warren Worthington, for one. But that could just be because the man obviously wasn’t fond of Remy. Bishop was another who was suspicious. Watching him, though, Spencer got the feeling that the man was suspicious of pretty much everyone. But Betsy, Bobby, Kurt, they all seemed fine with things. They treated it like it was just no big deal. The same way that Scott, Jean and Logan all had been.

Their reactions really threw Spencer. He thought about it that night when he finally settled in his room by himself to meditate and relax from the day. There was a sort of acceptance here that Spencer had never really found anywhere else. Sure, his team had been accepting of things, but even they had been thrown by this bond. Of course they had. Why wouldn’t they? But the people here, they just treated it like it was no big deal. “Stranger things have happened around here.” Bobby had told him earlier while they were all eating dinner. “Wait until you’ve died and come back a few times, or gone crazy, or done a little time traveling. We kind of specialize in weird around here.”

There was one very positive thing about this whole experience that Spencer was most definitely enjoying. For the first time in his entire life, he was someplace that he didn’t have to pretend. He didn’t have to hide who he was or what he could do. He didn’t have to watch his reactions to make sure he did nothing to give away his mutation. They all knew that he was an empath and they all knew about this new healing ability. He didn’t have to hide. When the people around him at the dinner table were happy and laughing as they told stories, no one looked askance at Spencer for smiling so much. He didn’t have to worry that they’d question why he was so happy. The warmth of their emotions warmed him and he actually had the freedom to allow it. It was Heaven.

When he lay down to sleep that night—after giving a quick mental check to make sure that Remy was safely tucked away next door—there was a smile on his lips. He never noticed how his hand shifted out, reaching for a body that wasn’t there.


	8. Chapter 8

That first day set an easy routine for the two men. Each morning, they separated, practicing trying to not only be away from one another but to function without the other there. They were tested on how much they could handle without the link distracting them from it. Logan took Remy while Jean took Spencer. To make some distance, Logan and Remy took their bikes and headed off property, testing the limits of their comfort. They stopped before it got to the danger point for each man. It was a test to see not only if they could maintain at least some distance, but to see if they could stretch that distance a little, sort of training them to be apart. Desensitize them, so to speak. It seemed to be working, too, little by little.

They broke for lunch, sending the two off to eat together, away from the team. Jean insisted that it was important right now for them to reaffirm that bond together after being made to be apart. She and Charles both agreed that it would be easier on them with that alone time. The two men didn’t protest at all. They took their lunch and set off, usually to the boathouse or the dock, to sit together and talk and eat. Little by little they were getting to know each other.

In the afternoons, Remy had a session in the Danger Room while Spencer met with Hank, the one that had been decided might best be able to help him understand some of his healing. Not because of any power of his, but because of his mind. Hank had a wealth of knowledge and he put things into terms that Spencer accepted much easier than he did the things Charles said. Spencer ran off of facts and logic. To understand his powers, he had to understand what was going on. He knew how it worked in his body. What he needed to understand was how it worked in others. Also, when minor injuries came through, a person was asked if they would be willing to let Spencer practice. More often than not they said yes, and he was able to practice his healing. Each time, he felt he gained a little more control.

He was still surprised by how well everyone seemed to take this. Or, more to the point, how they just didn’t care too much. Then again, the general impression amongst some of them seemed to be that this was just some strong empathic link that the two men shared and was therefore no big deal. They were used to Jean and Scott sharing a link and didn’t really see this as any different. Sure, they noticed that Remy touched this guy more than he did most, but Remy had always been a touchy guy. Mostly, they wondered how Rogue was going to handle this when she got back. A few discreet bets were placed on who was going to come out the victor in that fight. Rogue had sheer strength on her side but Remy was a crafty son of a bitch.

Remy was more surprised by how much he found himself truly liking the young FBI agent. The man was nothing like what Remy had first thought he’d be. From the get go, Remy had been ready to try and like the man. With being told that they were going to be basically stuck with one another for at least the foreseeable future, if not the rest of their lives, he had figured there was no point in fighting about it and he might as well just make nice with the guy. Good thing, too, as he seemed to have a hell of an instinct in him to protect the kid. But he hadn’t figured on really coming to like him. Spencer was shy, nervous, awkward, socially inept, and had almost no confidence in himself. He had a sense of humor that didn’t always make sense to others and most normal jokes went past him without registering. He tended to babble on about things that no one else seemed to understand and his brain made lightning fast connections that seemed nonexistent to others yet made total sense to him. One moment you could find yourself talking with him about plans for the day and by the time the conversation wound down you could somehow be talking about the history of bread or something equally strange.

He was more than all that, though. Spencer was also kind, friendly, stronger than he looked, and he had a capacity for caring in him that was amazing, even if he didn’t always know how to show it. No matter who he spoke with or what it was about, he always devoted his full attention to the conversation in a way that made the other person really feel like they were being heard, not just listened to. There was something about him that let people know that this was a man who was well used to taking care of himself and of others around him. He was very much a caretaker. At the same time, that very same thing seemed to make people want to take care of him in turn.

Each day seemed to bring a new test for the two. On their third day there, they skipped the separation testing and tried a different test entirely. For this one, they kept the boys both in the house and allowed them to be near one another if needed but asked them to go as long as possible without touching. They made it through until dinnertime before they broke. Surprisingly, it wasn’t Remy that did; it was Spencer. All day long he’d been fighting back the urge to reach out to Remy. It surprised him just how much he found himself wanting to do it. He hadn’t realized just how much they touched. He’d thought he was holding himself back before. It was shocking to realize just how much they must touch without ever even thinking about it. He didn’t notice until he was deprived of it. All through the day, Spencer was miserable. His emotions had slowly sunk down as the day progressed, causing him to pull back from everyone just the slightest bit. It was like a cloud of depression had settled over him. Nothing felt right.

He kept gravitating towards Remy and he found himself reaching out countless times before he caught himself. But he kept trying until finally, he couldn’t take it. Everyone was gathered in the dining room for dinner and Spencer was hunched down in his chair, picking at his food and discreetly watching Remy through his hair. The man was sitting beside him, his body tense, and his expression dared anyone to piss him off right about now. Spencer could feel how hard this was for Remy. That, more than anything else, was the final straw. “Enough of this.” Spencer blurted out. All eyes shot towards him and he felt his cheeks flame in response. He didn’t let it stop him, though. Deliberately he set his fork down and then reached out and laid his hand over top of Remy’s on the table. “I think that’s long enough for now. This test is over.”

Everyone could see the two men sigh in relief when skin touched skin. Some of the tension melted off of Remy’s face and Spencer stopped hunching so much in his seat. Remy turned his hand so that they were palm to palm and he threaded their fingers together. Neither man let go through the rest of dinner.

CXCX

Spencer had been at the mansion for almost five days before he found himself down in the Danger Room. He didn’t understand at first why they’d brought him there. Everyone else was in here often enough for training sessions, Remy included, but Spencer had had no reason to be here so far. He didn’t know why he needed to be here now. It didn’t take long for him to find out why. Remy, Spencer, Scott and Logan all stood inside of the room and Scott explained exactly what they were doing there. He pointed out that Remy had fought in here plenty of times since they’d come back and Spencer had showed no reaction except for a slight tenseness and once, when Remy got hurt, a need to look Remy over afterwards. Now it was time to see how things worked in reverse. They needed to see Spencer fight and see how Remy reacted to it.

The only thing was, Spencer didn’t want to fight. They’d managed to get him into the Danger Room by not telling him what was going on until he was there, but Scott was discovering how stubborn Spencer could be as he tried to convince him to do this. “I don’t fight, Scott.” Spencer insisted. His hands were stuffed into his pockets and his body posture was tight. As an even better indicator of Spencer's mood, Remy was tense on the sidelines, his eyes glued on Spencer.

“It’s just sparring, Spencer. I’m not asking you to actually try to hurt someone. You know why we have to do this. We need to see how you do and how he does.” Scott said.

“You’re not hearing me. _I don’t fight_. I’m not exactly the physical type, in case you haven’t noticed.”

A frustrated sigh slid from Scott. “You had to pass hand-to-hand to work at the Bureau, didn’t you? And you have to be ready to wrestle with your bad guys. Just treat this like that.”

If he thought that would get him to win, he was wrong. Spencer didn’t move, didn’t even blink. He already had his reply ready. “Ultimately the Bureau had to make exceptions in pretty much everything physical just to allow me into the field. My job on the team is as a brain. Morgan is the one for chasing and wrestling Unsubs and kicking down doors. I am much more adept at talking an Unsub down than fighting with them.”

“And what about when we get this all figured out and you maybe go back to work? What’re you going to do if this Morgan isn’t there and you have to fight with one of your Unsubs? Don’t you want to know what it could potentially do to Remy if that has to happen?” Shamelessly Scott played on their obvious need to take care of one another. He played on the part of Spencer that felt the need to keep anyone from harm.

It worked, too. They could all see it. Spencer's eyes snapped to Remy and then drifted back to Scott before becoming shuttered. His whole face went blank. “Fine.” The flat sound to Spencer's voice had Scott wincing slightly. “Let’s get this done, sir. I have other things I need to attend to this afternoon.”

Off on the sidelines, Logan had to put a hand on Remy’s shoulder to keep him from going to Spencer. The Cajun was staring at Spencer and his whole body was practically vibrating with the need to go to him. Seeing that had Scott wincing once more. He’d really upset Spencer. Really, really upset him. But this needed to be done. This was important. But before he could do anything, Logan came striding out towards them. “Why don’t I do this, Slim?” He called out. When he got close, he cast a look behind him at Remy’s tense frame and then he turned a wry grin on Scott. “Least if the kid freaks, he can’t kill me.”

Logan and Spencer stood facing one another in the middle of the room. The young genius held himself rather stiffly, his discomfort visible in every line of his body. Logan reacted to it and tried to reassure him slightly. “It’s okay, Stretch. It’s just a little friendly sparring, that’s all.”

“Of course.” Spencer pulled in a deep breath. When he blew it back out, the tension seemed to drain from him. His body relaxed and the tension faded away to be replaced with a casual air. For all intents and purposes, he looked completely at ease. The two men observing might’ve believed it if it hadn’t been for Remy. His body was still taunt and his gaze was locked on Spencer. He wasn’t vibrating anymore with that need to race over to him but it was obvious that he wasn’t happy with whatever Spencer was feeling. His hands were hooked onto his pockets and there was no doubt how quickly he could move to grab and charge cards if he needed to.

There was nothing they could do about it right then. This had to be done. Logan nodded at Spencer and then shifted back a few steps, putting his body into position.

When Logan made his first move, Scott kept an eye on Remy. The point of his exercise was to assess how Remy would do with Spencer in a potentially dangerous situation. Sure, they were assessing Spencer's ability at the same time. That was just logical. If the man was attached to Remy, they needed to make sure he could fight. But Scott trusted Logan’s assessment on that, so he left Spencer to Logan and he focused on Remy.

Every time that Logan and Spencer came together, Remy tensed as if in preparation. The first blow that Spencer took, a simple graze of a fist against his arm that he mostly dodged, Remy’s hands clenched but he stayed where he was. So far he was doing well. He wasn’t charging out there, wasn’t trying to stop them. Seeing how well Remy was doing, Scott snuck a few glances out at Spencer. He watched the agent for a few moments, drawn in despite himself. Spencer didn’t actually ‘fight’ Logan. His moves were very much defensive. It was obvious that most of what he was doing was either to avoid a blow or to defend himself from one. He didn’t actually demonstrate any combat skills. It was equally obvious that he was quite talented at evasion. That right there told Scott quite a bit about the man. To be that skilled at avoidance in a fight spoke of lots of practice. How many times had he been beaten up to gain this kind of ability?

It was inevitable that Logan would get a shot in, though. The man was too talented not to. Scott saw what was going to happen just seconds before it did. Spencer twisted back to avoid a blow, realizing at the last second that his move put him in an even worse position. There was no time for Spencer to block or for Logan to pull the blow very much. There was a fairly solid strike that sent Spencer flying backwards, back slamming into the wall, and that was when enough became enough for Remy. Cards flew from his hand, a quick volley that blasted in front of Logan, knocking him backwards. In the brief moment that created, Remy snapped his Bo out and used it to launch himself over, clearing the distance between him and Spencer. He landed and twisted to face Logan, his staff held at the ready, a snarl on his lips, and he prepared to launch forward at the man.

Maybe even more surprising was Spencer's reaction. The young genius shoved away from the wall and went right up to Remy’s side before the Cajun could so much as take a step forward to attack. The man that all of them had seen be so shy, the one who avoided most physical contact, almost plastered himself up against Remy’s side. One hand came up to smooth back Remy’s hair while his other hand went to Remy’s chest, resting over his heart. Just faintly the others could hear the soft words that Spencer murmured. “It’s okay, Remy. It’s okay. I’m fine. Look at me, okay? There is no threat here. I’m all right.” He lifted his hand off of Remy’s heart, laying it on the Bo. He pushed, slowly lowering one end of it until he and Remy had one end pressed to the ground. “That’s it. We’re safe here. We’re safe.”

Remy let go of the Bo with one hand. Then he quickly snaked that hand around Spencer's waist, anchoring the man against him. Spencer let go of the Bo as well so that both hands could cup Remy’s head. Their foreheads pressed together and Spencer's words became too soft for normal senses to hear. Logan’s enhanced hearing picked up on it, though he realized that it was more the tone than the actual words that mattered. Spencer's tone was low and reassuring. A softness that was meant to soothe. Little by little the tension drained away from Remy. At a murmured word from Spencer, the Cajun retracted his Bo and slipped it back into its usual spot.

Scott turned to look at Logan, one eyebrow lifted. “Well, I guess that answers that.”

“Yeah.” Logan cast the two a contemplative look before shaking his head and turning back to Scott. “I told ya, when it comes to the kid, Cajun’s more feral than anything else. He’s gonna protect what’s his.”

“Apparently.” Scott said dryly. He raised his voice slightly to call out to the two across the room. “Why don’t you two go ahead and go? We’ll meet later to discuss things.”

The two barely acknowledged him as they made their way out of the Danger Room. It was interesting to watch them move together. Spencer stayed against Remy’s side and Remy kept his arm around him, holding him in close and tight. When they left and the doors shut, Scott shook his head. That was definitely going to be interesting if the two encountered anyone while like that. He thanked the fact that Logan had predicted this enough to plan accordingly. The Canadian had made a point to ask Jean to keep people away and occupied while they did this. Scott could only imagine how the others might react if they saw the two plastered together this way. There were already enough whispered bits of gossip about the two men.

As if reading his thoughts, Logan said “Hope Jeannie kept everyone away long enough. Might start a few jokes, otherwise, and there’s no telling how the Cajun would react. He’s in full protect mode right now.”

“It’s interesting that Remy’s instincts are so strong and feral-like when it comes to Spencer, but Spencer's seem to be a little more mellowed when it comes to Remy. He doesn’t seem to have the intense protection need that Remy does.”

Logan hooked his thumbs in his belt loops and nodded. “They’ve got roles in this bond, it looks like. Rem is definitely the protector. But I think it’s got somethin’ to do with more than just them fighting. I think it’s the emotions there.”

“What do you mean?” Scott asked curiously. Though not many realized it, Scott trusted Logan’s opinions on things. Even if he didn’t always approve of the man’s methods or actions in certain things, he had respect for him and for his intelligence.

“Well, look at it like this. We all know how Gumbo gets in a fight. He lives for it. He loves the high of it all.” Logan pointed out. “He’ll grin at you as he blows you back. Hell, he’ll laugh when he gets hit sometimes and then hop right back up and knock your ass down. So maybe the kid didn’t react when Rem was fightin’ or when he got hurt cause he could feel Rem’s enjoyment in it. But Spencer didn’t wanna do this. He didn’t want to fight. I’d bet what he felt wasn’t happy or anything like that and the Cajun reacted to those emotions.”

Scott’s lips quirked with a hint of humor. “That was almost an intelligent analysis, Logan.” He lifted his hands and lazily clapped. “Very good.”

Snorting, Logan flipped him his middle claw. “Fuck off, Slim.” The words were said without any serious heat to them. As he left the Danger Room, he heard Scott’s laughter behind him.

CXCX

Scott and Logan weren’t the only ones to think that Remy’s behavior was feral-like. Through their bond, Spencer could feel Remy’s strong need to protect that was raging through him like a wildfire. It was absolutely amazing to feel. It was an instinct, almost primitive in its intensity, and all encompassing. Everything else was blocked out at the moment except for that feeling. Knowing that, Spencer didn’t protest at all as Remy hustled him upstairs. He didn’t even protest when he was taken into Remy’s room and the door was shut, locked, and bolted. It was more amusing than annoying, really. The scientific part of Spencer's mind was watching all of this with absolute fascination. The behavior Remy was exhibiting could be considered animalistic. He had taken Spencer away from a threat, brought him to his own territory, and now he was securing them inside that territory. He’d gotten Spencer to the bed and sat him down and then went about checking all the locks at his window and his door and he was prowling around the room like he was looking for some kind of threat.

Once the territory was secure, the Cajun made his way back to Spencer. He immediately sat down on the bed beside him and reached out like he was going to touch him before he jerked his hands back. He curled them into fists and folded them down into his lap. “Are y’ okay, Spencer?”

Interesting. Spencer could see just how hard Remy was fighting to keep from reaching out. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what Remy wanted to do. Spencer debated for only a second before he made his decision. “I’m fine, Remy. Go ahead and check me over yourself. I promise, I don’t mind.” They were in Remy’s room, alone and safe. There was no harm that could come from indulging the man’s need. And it _was_ a need, not just a want.

Still, Remy hesitated. It was strange to see hesitation on that usually confident face. Spencer stayed quiet and watched, waiting to see what the man would do. He watched Remy’s hands clench tight for a moment. “Are y’ sure, Spencer?” Remy finally asked. “I…I know y’ don’t like being touched all dat much and lookin’ y’ over, dat’s a personal touch.”

Ah, so that was what was wrong here. Their bond allowed Remy to know what Spencer was feeling and he’d probably caught on quickly that Spencer was shy and hesitant about touches. Uncomfortable, really, most of the time. He also had probably figured out early on that Spencer tried to avoid touching as much as possible. He was being kind here, and respectful. That fact actually served to relax Spencer even more. Despite how strong this need was for him, Remy was still trying to show restraint out of respect for him. Spencer's trust in the man grew a bit in that moment. He reached out and laid his hand over top of Remy’s clenched fists. “I’m sure. This, it isn’t sexual, it isn’t violent, and it isn’t wrong. This is the protector inside of you demanding a medical assessment, essentially. Do what you need to.”

He could see on Remy’s face when the man finally decided to just give in. Remy lifted his hands and started at Spencer's head, lightly touching the back of his head and feeling through his hair to check for any damage from where he’d hit the wall. When he’d assured himself that there was nothing there, he moved his hands downward, reaching out for the buttons on Spencer's shirt. He froze there, eyes flickering to Spencer's face, not doing anything until he saw Spencer's small nod. Then his fingers made quick work of the buttons. Spencer wasn’t wearing a tie or vest today so it was easy for Remy to get him out of his button up shirt, leaving Spencer sitting there in just an undershirt. Remy checked over each place where Logan had ever managed to connect with him during the sparring session. Spencer held still and watched the whole process with interest. Only a slight buzz of discomfort was in him. The rest of him was too caught up in watching this moment.

He watched as Remy finished his exam and apparently declared Spencer fine. There was still some stress on him, though. Some agitation that Spencer could feel. While checking Spencer over had helped, it didn’t seem to be enough. There was still this edge to Remy, like he was still battling back both temper and worry. Spencer could see it on his face and he could feel it in their bond. One idea came to him that might set Remy at ease, but it made Spencer flush a little. This kind of behavior wasn’t him! It wasn’t how he acted and it wasn’t how he did things. But he couldn’t deny that the idea appealed to him, too. And he just knew it would help Remy relax a little. _Don’t be a coward about this. You knew things were going to change with this. This is just one of those things. You can do this! You’ve done it already, really. This isn’t any different._

Spencer bit his lip and looked up at Remy through his bangs. Red and black eyes were watching him intently, the man most likely reading Spencer's shifting emotions. “What is it, _mon ami_? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Spencer drew in a breath and made himself sit up a little. This was stupid. There was no reason to be bothered by this. No reason at all. He could do this. “Listen, Remy, neither one of us is relaxed and I think I know a way to help us both.”

“What is it?”

There was trust in those words and in the way Remy was looking at him. He was trusting Spencer to have some kind of answer. Why hadn’t he ever realized just how heavy a burden trust could be, or how liberating it was? Spencer tried to ignore those thoughts for now. One problem at a time. He couldn’t seem to bring himself to speak, though. The words just wouldn’t come. So he’d have to settle for actions. Bending down, he started unlacing his shoes, first one and then the other. After setting them down at the edge of the bed, he started to scoot back until he was on the side of the bed furthest from the door. All the while he purposely kept himself from looking at Remy. There was no way for Remy to misunderstand what he was doing, though. Spencer lifted up the blankets and slipped down inside of them until he was lying down. Then he patted the space in front of him. “I think we could both use a bit of a lie-down, don’t you?”

Understanding washed down the bond, followed by a small little hint of relief. “ _Oui,_ cher. Dat sounds like a good idea t’ me.”

He wasn’t surprised when Remy chose to lay turned towards the door. It put his back to Spencer, who was perfectly content with that. Looking at one another would’ve made this all the more awkward and difficult. Spencer was having a hard enough time of things without adding that in. Not having to look at Remy’s face made it a little easier for Spencer to inch just a bit closer to Remy’s back. He drew up one hand and laid it flat between Remy’s shoulder blades. When Remy said nothing to that, Spencer scooted in just the tiniest bit more until he could rest his forehead against the back of Remy’s shoulder. The both of them seemed to ease even more at that. This was awkward, strange, and yet it felt like the most natural thing in the entire world. Those conflicting emotions left Spencer more confused than ever. He had no idea what this was or why this felt right, only that it did.

Closing his eyes, he pushed those thoughts away and tried to clear his mind. Stressing would do nothing to relax either one of them. The whole point of this was to try and ease the protector in Remy. Lying back here worrying wouldn’t do that. It would just make things work. Spencer tried to clear his mind sort of like he did when he meditated. After a while, he felt it beginning to work, not just for him but for Remy too. The more that Spencer relaxed, the more Remy relaxed, until finally Spencer relaxed so much that he slipped down into sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

The muffled sound of Spencer's phone was what woke him. Instinct brought on by years at the Bureau had him pulling it out of his pocket and answering before he even opened his eyes. “Reid.” Still mostly asleep, he snuggled in a little closer to the warm body in front of his. He felt Remy tense and worry race through the man. Spencer sent him a wave of reassurance and absently patted at him in what he hoped was a calming manner. It seemed to work. The man’s body relaxed once more.

“ _Hey, kid. I just got your message so I thought I’d call you back._ ” Derek said.

Ah, a personal call, then. Not a work-related one. Spencer let his body melt back into the bed and the blankets. “Mm. Good to hear from you. How are you?”

“ _I’m good. Were you sleeping?_ ”

“Mm hm. S’kay, though.” Spencer paused briefly to yawn. “I can still talk.”

“ _Of course you can still talk. It’s just more dangerous to talk to you. Better to wait until you’ve had coffee, at least.”_

Another yawn slipped from Spencer. When it was done, he mumbled “Bite me.” He felt Remy’s hand start to stroke up and down his back and he made a little happy sound in the back of his throat. He took note of the fact that Remy had rolled to face him at some point while they were asleep. He and Remy were both on their sides, facing one another now, and Spencer was in the circle of Remy’s arms with his nose right up against Remy’s chest. It should’ve frightened him. At the least, he should’ve wanted to move. Instead, he arched back a little into that touch while leaning his head in enough that his forehead pressed against Remy’s chest.

Derek’s laugh came over the phone line, echoed by Remy. “ _Proof in point. Did you, Dr. Reid, one of the most well-read and brilliant men I know, just tell me to bite you?_ ”

“Yep.” Spencer said. Hearing Derek laugh and feeling Remy’s laugh, Spencer made a low grumbling sound and he moved one hand to poke at Remy’s belly. It made him grin sleepily when Remy jumped. Hey, looks like he’d found a ticklish spot.

“ _So, how are things going, Reid?_ ”

Spencer rolled his eyes. “You mean ‘have you guys fixed this yet’. And the answer is no, we haven’t. We’re still in the testing stage of things, just as we were when I spoke with you two days ago.”

Derek didn’t even sound embarrassed at his overprotectiveness. “ _I can’t help worrying about you, you know that._ ”

“I know. I’m surrounding by overprotective people. It seems to be my lot in life.”

“ _So you should be used to it by now. Do they have any idea how long any of this is gonna take?”_

“No, we don’t. It’s not an exact science. There’s no precedent for this. No one that Charles has spoken with has known anything about this bond. It’s hard for him to get information when he has to try and be careful not to arouse too much interest. But we are testing things and learning bit by bit just how this works for us. That’s what we were doing earlier, which is why I was napping in the middle of the day.”

“ _What kind of testing are they doing that it makes you tired like that?”_

This wasn’t going at all how he’d wanted it to go. Derek didn’t sound reassured in the least bit. If anything, he sounded more worried. Spencer let out a sigh and rolled onto his back so he could have the room to reach up and rub at his face. He knew Derek wouldn’t just let this go. Not over something that concerned a person he cared about. Better to just answer and get it all out of the way. “The bond affects all levels of our bodies, not just our minds. What we test has a physical reaction. We’ve tested how far apart we’re capable of going and then we work each day on trying to stretch that distance. We’ve tested how our bodies react to lack of physical contact. We’ve had to test how I react to Remy being in a physical combat style situation and how I react when he’s injured. Today, we tested how Remy reacts when I’m in a combat style position, inadvertently allowing us to test how he reacts to the potential for me being injured.”

“ _Injured? Reid…_ ”

“I’m fine, Morgan. I’ve been poked, prodded, scanned, checked, tested and examined in almost every possible way that can be thought of, but I’m fine.” Spencer cut himself off, grimacing at the crankiness he could hear in his tone. Dammit, he didn’t want to snap at Derek. None of this was his fault. Before his friend could comment on his words or his tone, he said “I’m sorry, Morgan. You’re probably right; our conversation should probably wait until I have some coffee. I think I’m just a little more tired than I thought. Why don’t I call you back later tonight, okay?”

It only took a few more minutes to reassure Derek and get off the phone. That was one thing that Spencer really enjoyed about his friendship with the man. Derek was one of those people who respected boundaries when they were put up and who understood when it was time to just back off.

Spencer dropped his arm over his eyes once he hung up his phone. For a moment he just lay there, wishing he could just roll over and go back to sleep. Pretend for just a little while longer that the rest of the world wasn’t waiting out there for him. Only, things didn’t work like that. Even if he wanted to forget the world, he couldn’t forget the man lying there next to him. Remy’s emotions were a mix that couldn’t be ignored. Guilt, worry, upset, regret. It was enough to have Spencer moving his arm and turning his head just slightly. He found Remy lying there, watching him carefully. “What is it?” Spencer asked him, voice soft. “What’s wrong?”

“Why didn’t y’ say how much all dis testing was buggin’ y’?” Remy asked.

Oh, that. “Because it’s necessary. We can’t get answers without testing our questions.”

“Dat don’t mean y’ can’t take a break fo’ a while. Aint like we’re gonna vanish on dem anytime soon, _mon ami_. We deserve a bit of time off, just like anyone else.”

There was a hint of something in Remy’s words that sounded almost, wistful. Spencer turned his head a little more. As he looked at Remy, he realized he’d been an idiot. He wasn’t the only one that was tired of the testing. He wasn’t the only one that needed a break. Just, Remy wasn’t going to admit it. Spencer had already learned these past five days that Remy was a strong and proud person. Asking for help or showing weakness just wasn’t in character for him. Maybe Spencer would’ve attributed it to something caused by the bond, but everyone around here acted as if it were all normal, and that told him that it was one of Remy’s personal traits. Spencer could understand that. He didn’t like to appear weak either. Especially not around his friends. But he knew that sometimes, weakness was necessary. Sometimes, to take care of others, you had to let them think they were taking care of you, and the quickest way to do that was to appear weak, even if you weren’t.

Remy needed this break just as much as he did. Spencer could see that now that he was looking for it. And the caretaker in him, which stood out even more around this man, demanded that he do something to help. Thankfully, there was a simple enough solution. Rolling back onto his side, Spencer let his eyes drop down to look at Remy’s shirt instead of his face, and he let his voice be just slightly hesitant. It was manipulative, he knew, but he’d work with what skills he had. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe we, we should take a break. Do you think we could just, well, maybe just stay here a little while?”

“ _Mais oui_.” Remy answered instantly.

“Thanks.” The flush that hit Spencer's cheeks wasn’t a manipulation. He snuck a look up and flashed his usual, shy smile. “I just…I’m tired of being watched, I guess. I’d like to just sit and relax for a little while and I know that as soon as we go down there, they’re going to want to talk about earlier and I don’t really want to yet.”

Remy nodded his understanding. “Y’ wanna go back t’ sleep fo’ a bit?”

Spencer shook his head.

“Well, I got m’ laptop, if y’ wanna watch somet’ing. I can find us a show online t’ watch.”

Now that sounded like a plan. Spencer tipped his head up and finally looked at Remy head on. “You know, that sounds great.”

In short order, the two men were sitting up on the bed with pillows behind them to help prop them up and Remy’s laptop open on Remy’s lap. He turned to flash a smile at Spencer. “Anyt’ing y’ in de mood fo’?”

“Something funny.” As soon as Spencer said it, he knew what he wanted. His whole face lit up and he smiled. “Let’s watch M*A*S*H. That show’s always good for a laugh.”

“Aint never seen it b’fore. It a good one?” Remy asked.

Spencer froze. His mouth dropped open and his eyes widened with surprise. “You’ve never seen M*A*S*H?”

Shrugging, Remy started typing, looking up a site to watch the show from. “ _Non_. Didn’t really do TV much, me.”

“Me either, but my mother loved this show. We used to sit down together at night and watch it. Go on, find it. I guarantee, you’ll laugh.”

A few minutes later, the theme music to the show started playing from the speakers. Remy stretched his legs out and settled the laptop at a good angle for the two of them to see. Spencer settled down into the blankets and prepared himself to just sit back, relax, and have a good time. The rest of the world be damned. They could all wait their turn. Right now, they were going to sit here and watch a show guaranteed to make them laugh and just forget about their troubles, even if only for a few hours.

CXCX

A few hours later, the two men were in the kitchen, gathering a few things and sticking them on a tray. Remy snagged a few beers out of the fridge and set them on the tray while directing Spencer to the cupboard where snacks were hidden. “Grab de Funyuns, _mon ami._ Dere should be a bag stuffed down in de back of de cupboard.”

“Oo, perfect.” Spencer stretched slightly to look and grinned when he saw them. He drew the bag out and added it to the tray. Spotting a package of Oreos, he grabbed those too and added them to their growing stash.

Remy chuckled while he added the beer to the tray. “Y’ know, I’m beginnin’ t’ notice dat y’ got a bit of a sweet tooth, cher.”

Not bothered in the least, Spencer actually beamed, looking almost proud. “Morgan says I have the appetite of a teenager.” His smile grew just slightly devilish, a hint of that humor that few got to see now peeking through. “That’s usually followed by grumbles and a curse or two that he tries not to let me hear. Emily says he’s jealous that he can’t eat like that without having to hit the gym even harder than normal.”

“Y’ seem a wee bit smug about dat.” Remy teased him.

There was no reason to even try denying it. “I don’t have many reasons to be smug in comparison with Morgan. I take it where I can get it.”

The door to the kitchens opened, cutting off their conversation. The two men instantly turned that direction to watch as Jean came strolling in. She lit up at the sight of them. “There you are! We’ve been wondering about the two of you!”

A guilty look flashed across Spencer's face. In complete contrast, Remy grinned at her. “We been playin’ hooky.”

Jean went over to the fridge and grabbed herself a cold bottle of water. “Naughty boys.” She teased them.

“Wouldn’t y’ like t’ know?” Remy teased back.

Strolling over to the island, Jean leaned against it and inspected their tray. She looked up at them with a knowing look. “Movie marathon?”

“Television.” Spencer said. He set down the stack of napkins that he’d been grabbing when she came in. For a moment he’d been sure they were going to get lectured and he was surprised by how relaxed Jean seemed to be. She didn’t seem bothered in the least that the two were skipping out on their afternoon training sessions. A little flustered, he looked down at his hands, arranging the napkins with far more care than was necessary just so he could avoid having to look up at her. “We’re watching episodes of M*A*S*H. Remy hadn’t ever seen the show before and, well, I was in the mood for a bit of laughter.”

“Well, you’ll definitely get your laughter with that show.” Jean agreed. “You guys deserve the break. I know we’ve been pushing you hard the past few days.”

“We understand.” Spencer said, shrugging.

“I’m sure you do, sweetie. Still, everyone deserves a break.” With a last smile and a wave, she headed back towards the door. “Enjoy your show, boys.”

No sooner had she gone than Remy started to scoop up the tray. “C’mon, Spencer. Let’s get outta here b’fore someone else comes in an catches us. We got lucky wit’ Jeannie. We aint gonna be so lucky if we run int’ Scotty.”

The two men tried to move as quietly as possible as they made their way out of the kitchen and back upstairs. They had made it about halfway there when they heard the sound of people nearby. There was no time for them to slip away. Spencer made a quick decision and took hold of Remy’s arm. He pulled him back, pressing him against the wall, and held one finger up to his lips to gesture for silence. Then he quickly opened up his empathy just enough to project slightly around he and Remy. It was just in time, too. No sooner had he started the projection then Scott and Warren came around the corner. Spencer held still and kept up the projection, watching as the two men walked right past them without ever breaking stride in their conversation. They continued on down the hall and finally went through a door down at the end. Once they were gone, Spencer moved away from the wall, gesturing for Remy to follow him. He kept up the projection until they were safely back inside of Remy’s room. Then he closed it off once more.

Remy set the tray down on the nightstand beside the bed and then turned his full attention to Spencer, his look curious. “What was dat? Dey walked right past us like we wasn’t even dere! It was like we was invisible.”

“Not invisible.” Spencer said with a shake of his head. He stuffed his hands down into his pockets and rocked slightly on his heels. “I just, encouraged you them not to see us.”

“How?”

“I projected an aura around us that makes anyone who saw us suddenly want to look somewhere else.” Humor quirked the edges of his lips ever so slightly. “It does nothing against cameras and such, but it works wonders with people.”

It eased Spencer quite a bit when he saw that Remy was both amused and impressed with this ability. “Dat’s a hell of a talent y’ got dere. It’s part of y’r empathy?”

Seeing Remy start to settle onto the bed, Spencer moved forward as well, kicking off his shoes before taking up his previous position on the bed beside Remy. “It is. It’s just a mixture of emotions that encourage a person to want to look elsewhere, to not want to see what’s right there in front of them. It doesn’t hold up to intense scrutiny and strong emotions can break through it, but it generally works. It was the first thing I ever did with my empathy, even though I didn’t realize what I was doing at the time.”

“What happened?” Remy asked. He was adjusting the laptop on its tray over his lap and he looked up with his question, honestly curious.

This wasn’t a story that Spencer had ever told anyone. He bit his lip and unconsciously started to fiddle with the bottom of his shirt. He’d always neatly avoided telling anyone about how he first discovered his mutation. Most mutants found their powers brought on by some event or situation that worked to activate this twist in their genetics. Spencer had often wondered if there was something about the x-gene that might be triggered by a body’s fear response. His powers sure had come on at a time of fear for him. The memory washed over him, perfectly preserved by his eidetic memory.

At first, he didn’t even realize that he’d started speaking, words tumbling out of him as the memory played through his mind. “I was hiding from the football team in the auditorium. It was the perfect place to hide out with all these little hidey holes all over the places. Usually, I climbed up into the rafters and hid out up there. None of them ever looked there. But I couldn’t make it up there that day.” They’d already caught him once that day and, though he hadn’t known it at the time, what he’d thought was a sprained wrist had actually been a broken wrist. It had kept him from climbing, though, and he’d been forced to try and hide by some of the props. “I was crouching down in my hiding spot and I remember that my head was killing me. I didn’t realize at the time that it was a headache from the onslaught of my powers manifesting. But my headache distracted me and I didn’t notice that they’d come in until I heard one of them come close. The next thing I knew, the prop I was hiding behind was yanked out of the way and Brian Porter was there, staring down at me. I didn’t know what to do. I remember chanting in my head, over and over, ‘don’t see me, don’t see me, please don’t see me’. And, he didn’t. He looked there just a second longer and then he moved on.”

Spencer felt sorrow from Remy, strong and deep. He hadn’t wanted the man’s pity. He hadn’t told him this to make him feel sorry for him. Spencer cleared his throat and shifted around on his seat, trying to dispel his memories and brush aside his story. That was in the past; it wasn’t important anymore. He gestured with one hand towards the laptop and determinedly avoided looking at Remy. “Do you have the next episode ready? This is a good one.”

For a second he wasn’t sure if Remy was going to let him get away with the evasion. Then there was a swell of affection from the man just before he said “ _Oui, mon ami._ ” He brushed his hand lightly over Spencer's arm and reached up to the computer.

The episode was started and the two men settled back in against the pillows once more to lose themselves in the good humor of a great show. 

CXCX

Their little escape kept the two men secluded for the rest of the day. Neither knew that Jean had spoken to the others and made sure that they were left alone. She agreed with them that they needed the time to just step away from the tests and time for them to get more comfortable with each other. As each day passed it was becoming more and more likely that nothing was going to be able to separate the two. No information that they’d sent out for had come back with anything. There were hints of rumors here and there that bore checking into, but nothing concrete, nothing that anyone seemed to really want to admit to.

The next morning, the two knew they had to emerge once again and get back into the pattern of their tests and training. They also knew that Scott would most likely want to talk about what had happened in the Danger Room yesterday. So, after a quick breakfast that consisted mostly of coffee, the two men went together to Scott’s office. As they’d expected, he was already in there and he quickly gestured them inside after Spencer knocked.

The conversation wasn’t meant to be, though. No sooner had they stepped inside than Spencer's cell phone started to ring. The young agent looked down at the phone. When he saw the number that was there, he told the other two “Excuse me” and stepped off to the side, flipping his phone open.

Scott actually saw it happen as Spencer switched over from himself to his professional mode. “Dr. Reid.” He answered. Something passed over his face and his expression seemed to turn even more towards business, a calm mask that Scott had seen on many police officers and federal agents before. “Are you sure…? Of course, Garcia. I know. No, no, there was a slight change of plans. Yes, of course, I understand. Can you give me any pertinent information?” Spencer paused and a flush heated his cheeks, ruining that business look. It had Remy and Scott exchanging an amused look. Spencer's next words had them both giving in and chuckling. “I don’t have an email, Garcia…no, I don’t! What are you talking about, a work email? You know what, never mind, it doesn’t matter either way whether or not I have a Bureau issued email as I don’t know how to check it, nor do I have a computer to view it on. Plus, I wouldn’t want to take a laptop with me as I travel. I need hard copies to view it all and find a pattern.”

“Y’ can have it faxed over, Penny. Scotty’s got a fax right over there.” Remy pointed out.

Spencer and Scott both said “Don’t call me that” at almost the same time. Then Spencer was saying “No, no, Garcia, not you. I was speaking with Remy. He says there’s a fax here that you can send things to. Would that be a possibility? Wonderful.”

Remy told him the number and Spencer recited it dutifully before rising and going towards the fax machine. It only took a moment before it was coming to life. All of Spencer's attention focused on the pages that he was picking up and the phone that was now cradled between cheek and shoulder. “Yes, I’ll look at it en route. Yes, yes. Of course. Thank you, Garcia.” And then Spencer was shutting the phone and absently slipping it into his pocket.

The words of his conversation were slowly sinking in for Scott and he looked over to Remy before looking back to Spencer with surprise. “What’s going on, Spencer?”

“I need to go.” Spencer spoke distractedly, eyes trained on the papers he held. Suddenly his eyes sharpened and he looked up at them. “Is there someone that can take me into the city? I need to get to the airport.”

“And where on earth are you going?”

“Home. There’s a case in Vegas.”

“When are we going dere?” Remy asked.

Scott noticed Remy’s use of the word ‘we’, as well as the fact that Spencer didn’t protest it, and he quickly held his hands up, drawing their attention. “Now wait a second, you two can’t just go rushing off. We still haven’t figured out everything to this bond. Remy, you still can’t seem to handle any sign of Spencer being hurt, and that’s a possibility with him on the job. Until we understand things, it’s not safe for the two of you to go out like this.”

His words didn't have the effect he’d hoped. If anything, Spencer's expression firmed. “I’m sorry, sir, but I have to do this.” His hands clenched slightly over his papers before relaxing. “I don’t have time to stand here and argue this, either. As of that phone call, there are seven boys between the ages of eight and ten in Vegas, five of which are sitting in the morgue, and an eighth was just reported missing forty five minutes ago. That leaves us one current missing and two that are unaccounted for. Forty four percent of children who are abducted are killed within the first hour, seventy five percent within the first three, and most all are killed within the first twenty four hours. Now, judging by average flight time, depending on any stops and countless other variables, the time it’ll take to arrive in Vegas varies from five to six hours, putting the abduction clock anywhere from six to seven hours already by the time I arrive. Knowing that, I simply do not have time to argue about this. I need to go gather my things.” Without another word, Spencer hurried from the office.

Scott sat there for a moment, dumbfounded. How on earth could he argue with that kind of logic? Almost absently he found himself impressed at Spencer's ability to stun someone with words, enough so that he could do what he wanted before they had time to recover. What he had said was logical, and the facts were horrible. As horrible as the situation was, though, it didn’t negate what Scott had said. This wasn’t safe for them! Remy’s low voice broke him out of his thoughts. “Y’ aint gonna convince him to stay. Short of locking him up, y’ aint gonna be able to stop him. And y’ shouldn’t, anyways. Aside from being part of who he is, y’ gotta remember dat his team called him in fo’ dis, even knowing what’s going on. Dey aint gonna just let him not go. If we want him to have a life to go back to once we get t’ings figured out, den we can’t destroy it with one move.”

“Do you really believe he’s going to be able to just go back to work someday?” Scott asked bluntly.

It appeared he wasn’t the only one. The look that flashed over Remy’s face was slightly sad. “ _Non_.” He admitted softly. “And neither does he. _Mais_ dat’s a lot fo’ him to have to give up and he just aint ready yet. Dis t’ing here, maybe it’ll work to help him see dat, _oui_?”

For a moment Scott stayed quiet. He processed everything that had been said and tried to fit it all together. In the end, he knew there was only one response. There’d only really been one ever since Spencer had mentioned the missing children. The man sighed before straightening himself up. “Get a bag packed. I’ll go down and prepare the ‘bird. I’ll take you two out there, but I’m not sending you alone. Just in case something goes wrong, and something _always_ goes wrong with us, I’m sending you two with backup.”

Remy flashed him a quick smile. “ _Merci_ , Scotty”

“Yeah, yeah. Just get downstairs in ten minutes. And don’t call me Scotty.”


	10. Chapter 10

The fact that Scott forced chaperones on them didn’t bother Spencer in the least. When Scott told him and said that it would be Jean and Logan, Spencer had just nodded at him. He understood the reason why they needed guards and why Scott had chosen those two. Jean, for her telepathic abilities. She’d be able to watch over their bond if there were any trouble. Logan had most likely volunteered for this. Physically, he’d keep them safe if trouble hit, and he’d watch over them carefully because Remy was a good friend and Spencer was gradually becoming a good friend as well. They had to watch from a distance, though. Spencer could make up an excuse for having Remy with him and he knew his team would back him in that. But he couldn’t make up an excuse to have three bodyguards following him everywhere. That meant that Jean and Logan had to set up nearby, parked close in a rental car so that they could watch without being in the way or causing trouble. And without looking suspicious to a group of cops. It was a challenge that Spencer didn’t envy.

They arrived in Vegas before the rest of the BAU team did, thanks to the speed of the Blackbird. Spencer realized that when they walked into the police station and he didn’t feel the presence of his friends. He also realized that he needed to strengthen his shields a whole hell of a lot more if he was going to be in here. With his empathy having become stronger, his usual shields weren’t holding up inside the chaotic emotional storm that always resided in a police station. There were always so many strong emotions in places like this. Pain, fear, anger, despair, lust, disgust, shame, guilt, indignation…the list went on and on. All of them struck Spencer's shields before he even made it to the front door. The only thing that kept him from stumbling was Remy’s bracing hand catching him under his elbow. A small inflowing of strength came with that brief touch. Spencer accepted it, using it to bolster his shields, and he gave Remy a shy yet grateful smile. “Thank you.”

“ _Bien sûr_.” Remy stroked at his arm lightly before letting go. They both knew that they were going to have to be careful about things while here. There was no way they would get away with touching as often as they had grown used to.

When they got inside, Spencer went straight to the front desk. It took nothing for him to switch over to his agent mindset. This was his job and he knew it well. The officer behind the desk barely glanced up when they walked up to him. Spencer chose to ignore that. “Excuse me, but I need to speak with your Captain.” He pulled out his credentials and held them up as the officer looked up once more. “I’m part of the BAU team that’s coming in to help with the missing child case. The rest of team is still en route.”

All it took was mention of the missing child to get the man moving. In short order, Spencer found himself in room with evidence boards waiting and files being brought in and set on the table. Captain Ronald was happy to have them there and eager for anything they could offer.

“The team should be here within the hour, I’d estimate.” Spencer told the man, already moving some of the folder that had been brought in and gathering what he would need. “Once my boss gets here, he’ll coordinate with you on what you think needs done. While we wait, I’m going to start mapping out the geographical profile and finish preparing the room. Do you have a map I can use?”

“Anything you need, Dr. Reid.”

There was something in the man’s tone that had Spencer looking up. He took in the expression on Ronald’s face, his body language, and he held in a wince. “You know the victim?”

“The missing boy, he’s my best friend’s son.” Ronald said flatly. He turned away from the sympathy on Spencer's face. “I’ll get you that map, doctor. Anything else you need, don’t hesitate to ask. I’ll have your team escorted back here when they arrive.”

Well, that was going to make things interesting. There would definitely be some extra pressure to solve this case. Spencer tried not to focus on that. Instead, he focused on just doing his job. First things first, he needed to get the room set up, pictures up on the evidence boards, files sorted and ready. He snuck a quick look up at Remy, who had moved over to stand patiently beside him. Though it hadn’t occurred to him before, it did now. This wasn’t Remy’s job. Often, people who weren’t in this line of work didn’t handle these kinds of things very well—especially when it involved children, as this one did. “You know, you don’t have to stay in here.” Spencer offered cautiously.

“We gotta stick t’gether, _mon ami_.” Remy reminded him.

Licking his lips, Spencer tried to think of how to word this without offending the man’s pride. “We can handle being a small distance apart, better than we did before.”

A soft smile touched Remy’s lips. Discreetly, he lifted a hand and brushed his fingers down Spencer's arm, the touch meant to soothe them both. “I know it aint gonna be easy, what y’r gonna be doin’ here, cher. I can handle it. Y’ aint gotta protect me from dis.”

Spencer met openness with openness. “On a normal case, I wouldn’t have worried so much. But even our most veteran agents have troubles with cases that involve children. Especially with the things done to them that this Unsub as done to these kids. I’m just trying to save you from seeing things you won’t ever be able to un-see.”

Emotions thick and sweet like honey flowed over their bond. In those emotions were all the things that Remy couldn’t say right now with them being in such a public place. It spoke more than any word or touch. Still, Remy let his fingers discreetly slip up to brush over Spencer's wrist, tracing over his pulse point. “Don’t worry fo’ me, cher. Worry bout de children.”

He couldn’t force Remy away and they both knew it. They didn’t have the time to waste arguing it, either. Spencer had to respect Remy’s decision. He’d warned him; that was the best he could do. With a nod, Spencer turned his attention back to the work. He carried the warmth of Remy’s emotions inside of him, though. They helped him to keep his control as he pulled out the photos and he and Remy started to tape them up on one of the evidence boards.

At some point someone came in and brought them a map that Spencer then taped up on another board. As soon as it was up, Spencer directed Remy on which photos to tape up where and then left the man to it, freeing himself up to start the geographical profile. He was just finishing it up when the rest of the BAU team finally arrived.

Remy got to see here a hint at the young genius’s life before they’d met. The team came in, already talking and moving, and Remy watched as they didn’t even falter at bringing Spencer into their conversation. He was folded seamlessly back into the group as if he’d never been gone. Aaron walked right over to him and he didn’t even have to ask before Spencer started explaining what he had on his map. “I’ve just finished this, Hotch. This here,” His fingers traced over a circle he’d drawn on the map. “seems to be the comfort zone. The Unsub should either live or work somewhere within these borders.”

“Great work, Reid.” Aaron said. He turned over towards the rest of the room. “Morgan, get a copies out to the other officers so they know where to narrow down their search to. Also, get a copy over to Garcia and have her compare it against anyone these families have in common. Also have her try compare it to the list of local sex offenders. Prentiss, Rossi, I want the two of you to go over to the family for the missing boy and speak with them, see what you can find. Reid…” Here he turned once more to Spencer. “How well can you work?”

There was so much asked in that one question. Spencer finished capping his pens and set them down on the table. He glanced briefly over at Remy and then looked back to Aaron. “We can’t be apart. So long as he’s close, I can do my job, sir.”

“I’m keeping you away from the families, then. Take Seaver and head down to the morgue.”

After the way that Spencer had tried to shelter him from just the crime scene photos—which Remy could privately admit were things that would give him nightmares for a good long while—it wasn’t really surprising when they reached the hall outside the morgue and Spencer asked him to stay there. Again, Remy protested, reminding him that he didn’t need protecting. But this time, Spencer didn’t accept that as an answer. He looked around to make sure that no one but Ashley was close and then reached out and tucked a loose bit of Remy’s hair behind his ear. “I know you’re tough, Remy. You’re strong, there’s no denying that. But trust me when I say that you don’t need to see this.”

There was something in Spencer's voice that Remy rethinking his argument. He looked at him and gave the only answer he could—he nodded. He knew he’d made the right choice when he felt Spencer's relief. He sat down in a nearby chair and watched as the two agents disappeared through the morgue doors. Kicking his legs out and crossing them at the ankles, Remy adjusted his sunglasses to make sure his eyes were still covered and then he folded his hands in his lap and let his head lay back against the wall. For all appearances he looked to be asleep. In reality, he was closely monitoring the bond, using it to gauge Spencer's mood and general health.

He could feel Spencer's unease, feel how bothered he was by all of this, and he could feel the steady determination and strength that he was coming to learn were so much a part of this man. Spencer may not look that tough on the outside; on the inside, there was a core of strength that Remy was starting to come to see. No matter how much things hurt him, or scared him, or pissed him off, he just kept bearing up underneath it all and continuing on. Remy had heard Bobby telling Hank the other day that it was hard to believe that Spencer was an empath, especially a strong one, because the man didn’t really show a whole lot of emotion. He seemed to surround himself in facts, not emotion.

Remy snorted. If only people felt what he felt from the man. Then they wouldn’t doubt the man’s empathy. They wouldn’t doubt his feelings. Spencer felt things. He felt things so much deeper than the average person, it seemed. He just didn’t _show_ it. Why, Remy didn’t know. He had a few guesses. Nothing concrete, though. But he knew that Spencer felt it. He felt things so deeply it still left Remy stunned sometimes. Like right now. The sorrow that Spencer was feeling was so strong it was almost enough to bring Remy to his knees. Yet it was overlaid by that little twist of emotions that Remy was starting to learn meant Spencer was trying to be clinical, not emotional.

The doors opened suddenly and Remy cracked one eye open. He knew it wasn’t Spencer; he could feel that he was still in that room a little ways away. No, it was Ashley who came out. One look at her face told Remy that it had to be bad in there. She had almost no color and her eyes looked just a little wide in her face. She stumbled over towards the chairs and Remy reacted instantly, moving to his feet in one fluid move and catching her before she could stumble enough to fall. With careful hands he guided her down into a chair and then he took the one beside her. He kept one hand on her back, between her shoulder blades, and he pushed slightly until she started to bow down. “Here, petit. Head down between y’r knees. It’ll help y’ get y’r breath back. Dere y’ go, jus’ bend on down like dat till de room stops spinnin.”

“I’m sorry.” She gasped out. She stayed bent, arms resting on her knees and her head tucked down low.

Remy rubbed soothingly at her back. “Aint got not’ing t’ be sorry for, petit.”

“I should be able to handle this. It’s my job. I shouldn’t have to run out of the room because I feel like I’m going to throw up.”

“Dere aint no shame in feeling sick at what was done t’ dose babies. It should make y’ sick. It should break y’r heart.”

She pushed herself up a little, eyes lifting to the door she’d come out of. “It shouldn’t interfere with my job, though. Reid’s still in there. He kept calm and in control. That’s what I need to learn how to do. I just…I don’t know how to shut it all off, yet.”

Remy dropped his hand off her back. He shifted in his seat until he mimicked her pose, his arms on his knees with his hands dangling between them. “From what Spencer says, y’ aint been workin here dat log, cher. An he’s got years of experience on y’. He’s had time t’ learn how t’ function wit’ de emotions. He still feels it, just like y’.”

She turned to look at him. “Really?”

“ _Oui_.” Remy smiled kindly at her. He lifted one finger and tapped it against his temple. “Can feel it, me. So don’t beat y’rself up about it, _d’accord_? Dere aint no shame in feelin’ what y’ do. It’s de day y’ don’t feel not’ing dat y’ should worry.”

“Thanks.” Some of the color had come back to her cheeks and she was calm enough now to offer him a small smile.

Content now that she was calm, he sat back in his chair again, stretching his legs out once more. “Anytime. Remy’s always happy t’ help a _belle fille_ like y’rself.”

The doors to the morgue opened just as Remy was saying that and Spencer came strolling out. His eyes went straight to Ashley. “Judging by Remy’s flirting, I assume you’re feeling better?”

She flushed ever so slightly and quickly rose to her feet. “I’m fine, Reid. I’m sorry about that in there…”

He waved a hand, dismissing her apology. “Don’t be. For my first six months at the BAU I had to go to the bathroom to throw up after cases like this with children..”

Remy rose to his feet and moved to stand at Spencer's side, close but not quite touching. He felt the man relax ever so slightly and knew he’d judged it right. What he’d seen in there had left Spencer tense and aching. It warmed Remy inside to realize that he eased that feeling just by being close. Well, if that was all it took, he could handle that. He wasn’t going to be much use for Spencer in other ways on this case; he knew and accepted that. Profiling wasn’t his gig. But he’d do what he could to help Spencer through it. That in mind, he stuck close to the man’s side as they made their way out of there.

CXCX

It was no surprise for Spencer when he found himself heading to the Unsub’s dump site. As soon as he, Remy, and Ashley had gotten back, Aaron had told Spencer and Remy to go with Derek to view the dump site. It kept Spencer working while keeping him and Remy out of the way of other officers and away from family. Basically, it allowed Spencer to work with Remy with him without doing anything that might muck up their case. This all had to be done very carefully and Spencer knew that. He was willing to go where Aaron sent him without complaint.

Unfortunately, going out this way put Derek, Spencer and Remy all in the same car together, without anyone else around to hear their conversation. This was a moment that Spencer knew was inevitable and yet he was dreading it slightly. The two most protective people in his life and he was going to essentially be between them in a car. Joy oh joy. Derek was in the driver’s seat—naturally—and Remy didn’t hesitate to slip into the back, leaving the passenger’s seat for Spencer to take. The young genius thought nothing of it as Remy leaned forward and rested his chin on the shoulder of the seat, his arm going around the side by the door and draping over Spencer's shoulder so that his hand dangled there. It gave them the contact they both wanted. To better be able to see both his friends, Spencer turned just slightly, putting his back towards the door and the side of his head against his headrest. It put Remy right in front of him. Derek noticed and found himself surprised. He’d never seen Spencer let someone so much into his personal space.

There was no chance for Derek to start the grilling that Spencer knew he wanted to do. Remy spoke up before the other man could get the chance. “So, Spencer tells me dat y’r like his older _frère_.” He turned his head a little to flash his grin over at Derek. “I imagine dat means y’ aint dat fond of ol’ Remy right about now.”

The corners of Spencer's lips twitched. Leave it to Remy to just be that blunt. His words seemed to throw Derek for a second. The profiler recovered quickly and actually smiled a little. “I wouldn’t go that far. I’d day I’m more _cautious_ of you. You’re in a position where you could easily hurt someone I consider family.”

“I know y’ aint got no reason to believe me, _mais_ I’ll tell it to y’ anyways. Hurtin’ Spencer is de last t’ing I want to do. I’ll do everyt’ing I can, use everyt’ing I am, to keep him from being hurt.” Sincerity rang in every single word.

“Safety isn’t everything.” Derek pointed out. “There’s more to life than simply being safe. Reid’s had too much crap in his life. He deserves something, someone, that’s going to make him not just safe, but happy.”

“ _He_ is right here.” Spencer interrupted. His voice was calm and his expression held amusement to it. He wanted to shake his head at the both of them. “And I don’t think it right that you expect him to answer to you on my happiness. One, he cannot guarantee that I’m happy, as no one has that much control over life. Two, my life has _not_ been as bad as you seem to think it has been. I’ve had my happy moments. I like to think I’ve become a relatively happy adult. But, if it assuages your fears at all, I will tell you that Remy makes me happy. Does that help you?”

Derek stopped at the light and turned to look at his friend. “A little. But your definition of happy sometimes worries me, kid. You settle way too easily.”

“Geeze, try for a little more insulting next time, Morgan. I don’t think you got enough that time.”

The sarcasm surprised a laugh from the other two men, neither of whom had heard Spencer use sarcasm all that often. Remy bent his hand enough to pat Spencer's shoulder and he flashed a grin at him. “It’s okay, _mon ami_. He cares about y’, dat’s all. Remy don’t take no offense t’ dat.”

“I don’t mean any offense, either.” Derek said. “I’ve just gotten used to looking out for you, kid.”

Somehow Spencer managed to resist rolling his eyes. He knew Derek cared; all of this stemmed from the fact that he cared. Yet, at the same time, where had that caring been when he and the rest of the team had just blithely handed Spencer over to the X-Men, not even really knowing anything about them? Where had this protectiveness been then? Spencer knew that it was really the only option open to them at the time and he knew that it had been the smart choice to make. He found as he looked at Derek that he was still hurt by it, though. He quickly pushed that hurt down before Remy could get more than a glimpse of it. There wasn’t time for petty things like that. Besides, he wasn’t going to mess up one of the closest friendships he’d ever had simply because his feelings were hurt over something. Drawing in a breath, he pushed down his negative feelings and managed to get himself under control in just enough time for them to arrive at their destination. When the car parked, he climbed out and stood straight, ‘Spencer’ pushed down and ‘Agent Reid’ smoothly slipping into place.

CXCX

Growing up the way he did had left Remy with a rather large distrust and distaste for law enforcement. As he grew older, he learned to deal with it, to work around it, and even to ignore it sometimes, but it always sat there. Oh, he knew they did some good. He wasn’t so foolish as to believe that all law enforcement was evil. He just didn’t trust them. Coming here with Spencer, he’d had to push that feeling down and try not to let it get to him. Still, he was on high alert, watching cautiously around him the whole time. All it would take was one slip for one of these cops to see behind his sunglasses to his eyes. As soon as that happened, there’d be trouble, and not just for Remy. There’d be trouble for Spencer, too, who was so obviously close with the Cajun. The rest of the BAU team would probably get away with being safe. Remy doubted that any of them had seen his eyes at all. He’d had his sunglasses on when he first met them and he’d kept them on this time as well. It was always safer to just keep that little bit of himself hidden for as long as possible around people. Sometimes if he gave them a chance to get to know him first, then seeing it didn’t shock them as bad as it might’ve if they’d seen them right from the start.

Luckily for him, he didn’t have to be around the police station that long. To his utter amazement, only ten hours after their arrival, the BAU team found their missing boy, alive, and captured their Unsub. They caught the man at his house, with the boy down in the basement and the bodies of the last two unaccounted for boys buried in his backyard of all places. The bust had been one of the biggest tests of Remy’s control since he and Spencer had been bonded. One that he hadn’t been sure he would pass. The young genius went with them, of course, which meant that Remy came as well, despite the wariness of the others. It was only Remy promising to stay inside the SUV when they arrived that had them agreeing to bring him. Remy had to exercise more self-control than he’d realized he’d had just to keep inside that car. Only the steadiness of Spencer's emotions allowed him to pull it off. Thank God things went right. If they’d gone bad, if Spencer's emotions had spiked or showed fear, or if there’d been a gunshot, Remy wasn’t sure what he would’ve done. As it was, it was one of the hardest things he’d ever done, staying put here.

He practically had to sit on his hands when the group came back out of the house and he could see Spencer again. His eyes locked on that slender form and they never moved off of him in the bustle of people that came with this arrest. Somehow, Remy kept himself restrained and controlled enough to stay in place until Spencer, Derek and Emily came back to the SUV. He didn’t pay any attention as Derek and Emily slipped into the front seats. All of his attention was focused on the man that slid into the backseat with him.

Spencer took one look at Remy and his eyes widened at whatever he saw. Understanding flowed in their bond. “Get us out of here, Morgan.”

Bless the agent, he didn’t argue. He got the SUV turned on and was quickly backing them away from the house. Remy was still watching Spencer. He was almost vibrating with the need to give in to what his instincts were screaming at him.

Once they were out of immediate eyesight of all the cop cars, Spencer met Remy’s eyes and gave him a small nod. “Okay.”

That was all the permission that Remy needed. He slid across the seat, right up to Spencer, and he lifted his hands to put them on the man’s face. Spencer didn’t flinch underneath his touch. He held perfectly still and let Remy run his hands over him just as he had after the Danger Room incident. Remy used his touch to check for any sign of injuries. Spencer held still for it and didn’t protest at all to Remy’s touch. He just sat there and sent reassurance across the bond. “I’m okay, Remy. Nothing happened.”

“Reid?” Emily’s voice was both hesitant and worried.

Spencer didn’t move away from Remy’s hands, though he turned his eyes towards her briefly. “It’s okay.” He reassured his friends. “Part of this bond seems to have created a sort of protector inside of Remy, one that runs off of basic, primal instincts. One of which is ‘protect’. Since he wasn’t able to be in there with me in a potentially dangerous situation, he needs to reassure that part of himself that I’m safe and uninjured. I wasn’t thinking about it before, but we’re actually rather lucky he controlled himself enough to stay in the car at all. This protective instinct that was brought to life in him is amazingly strong.” Bringing his eyes back to Remy’s, Spencer caught his gaze and held it. “I am okay, though, Remy. There was no trouble whatsoever in there and I’m uninjured. I’m safe. I’m here with you now and I’m safe.”

“Don’t do dat t’ me again.” Remy scolded him. He finally stopped pawing at Spencer and settled for catching hold of his slender hands. “Dat aint an experience I wanna repeat again. I aint stayin’ back while y’ go rushing in t’ a dangerous situation. Not ever again.”

Something flashed briefly in Spencer's eyes but was gone before Remy could place what it was. He squeezed at Remy’s hands. “Never again.” He vowed softly. There was a hint of grief that touched his words, gave them just a slight ache. “I won’t make you go through that again. I promise.”


	11. Chapter 11

When the BAU team and Remy arrived at their hotel for the night, Jean and Logan were waiting for them. Though the case was done with, Aaron had obtained permission for the team to stay the night and leave tomorrow, something that everyone was appreciative of. As he told Spencer when he let everyone know about the plans, “We need time to talk about some things and I thought it would be smarter to do it here and get it done with. It can wait until morning, though. Right now, I think we all deserve to relax.”

That was definitely a good plan. Remy had been no further than a half foot from Spencer ever since he’d gotten back into the SUV and he was constantly keeping appraised of his emotions and general wellbeing, and he knew just how badly Spencer needed to relax. On the outside he was showing the world the calm and collected agent face; inside, he’d become this twist of emotions and none of them were good. It seemed like everything that he’d seen today was finally catching up with him. No one else noticed it, though. Spencer's mask was just too seamless. Remy knew that Spencer would try and head off to his room as soon as they got to the hotel. He’d seclude himself off while he dealt with this. Though he hadn’t known Spencer long, he’d already figured out that this was how the man dealt with his troubles. He shut himself away from others and worked through it all on his own. Well, the hell if he was going to get away with that now. Remy was going to take care of the man whether he liked it or not. He just wasn’t going to be able to come right out and say that’s what he was doing. Spencer had already shown that he was stubborn when it came to his own care. But when it came to others…

Remy had absolutely no shame about using that. He bided his time, waiting until they were at the hotel and the reintroductions had been made—“You guys remember Jean and Logan? Jean, Logan, this is the rest of my team…”—before he made his move. The other BAU members were starting to drift off towards their rooms when Remy lightly snagged Spencer's arm. He watched concerned brown eyes turn immediately back to him and he prepared himself to play on the concern he saw there. “Y’ got a minute, cher?”

“Of course.” Spencer turned briefly back to the others, who had stopped to watch and to wait for him, and he looked over to Derek, the person he’d been assigned to share a room with. “I’ll catch up with you after a bit, Morgan.” Then he turned back to Remy and the concern was back in his eyes. “Is everything okay?”

It still left Remy just slightly stunned when Spencer reacted to things like this. Especially since he could feel that Spencer's concern was genuine. He really did want to know if everything was okay and he actually cared about the answer. Even though it was that very caring that Remy was trying to use to his advantage here, it still amazed him. How on earth had Spencer made it in a job like this, a job that had to regularly rip his guts out, when he just cared so damn much about everyone? Remy pushed his questions away as something to think about later. Right now, it was time to try and get this man somewhere that he could take care of him properly, without Spencer ever being any the wiser. “Remy’s fine. Just a little twitchy still, y’know?” That wasn’t a lie. No reason to mention that he was twitchy because he could feel how fragile Spencer was inside. “Was t’inking maybe y’ might come hang out fo’ a little bit, watch a movie or somet’ing?”

He could actually see the thoughts run across Spencer's face. There was no hesitation in his answer, though. “Sure; that sounds fine.”

“Great.” Remy beamed at him and shifted the hold he had on Spencer's arm until his hand was curved in the crook of the man’s elbow almost like Spencer was formally escorting him somewhere. He felt a small hint of humor flash through Spencer at that.

Ten minutes later Jean was off in her room, after having quickly checked the two men over to make sure there was no serious train on them after the day’s events, and Logan was taking a quick shower while Remy cruised the phone book for some food delivery places. “What’re y’ in de mood fo’, _mon ami_?”

“Hm?” Spencer turned away from the window he’d been staring out of and blinked slightly distant eyes at Remy.

“I asked what sounds good fo’ dinner.”

“Oh. Nothing, thank you. I’m not all that hungry.”

Remy looked up from the phone book, trying to keep too much of his concern from showing. “Y’ should eat somet’ing.”

The way Spencer's expression softened and his cheeks heated a little, plus the warmth and slight embarrassment Remy could feel from him, said clearer than words that Remy hadn’t hidden his concern as well as he’d thought. Spencer didn’t call him on it, though. “I just don’t have much of an appetite right now, that’s all. I’ll make up for it at breakfast in the morning.”

One look at Spencer told him that this wasn’t worth pushing. Remy knew how to choose his battles. This wasn’t one he’d win. That was fine. He’d make sure Spencer really did make up for it come morning time.

Since it was just he and Logan eating, Remy just went ahead and ordered a couple large pizzas, enough to satisfy both of them. Logan could eat at least a whole large on his own when the mood struck. “Dere, foods on de way.” He said as he hung up the phone. Turning, he flashed a smile to Spencer. “Let’s cruise pay-per-view and see what dey got b’fore Logan gets back out here, _oui_?”

Spencer smiled a little at that. Pushing off from the window, he made his way over to the bed where Remy had just thrown himself down. “I take it you and Logan have different tastes in movies?”

Remy settled back against the pillows he’d stacked at the headboard and he grinned. “ _Oui_. Remy actually _has_ taste in movies.”

There was only a small hesitance before Spencer seated himself on the bed beside Remy. He didn’t sit down as close as they’d been when watching M*A*S*H in Remy’s bed, but he didn’t sit on the edge like Remy had been half afraid he would. Tipping his head, Spencer smiled almost shyly. “I’ll defer to your judgment on a movie, then.”

“Good choice, _mon ami_. Good choice.”

Before hitting the pay-per-view, Remy cruised through the local cable channels first. He kept up a running commentary as he went channel to channel. It seemed to be relaxing Spencer a little. He stopped sitting so stiffly on the bed. By the time Remy finally settled on a martial arts movie that he knew both he and Logan would like, one that was just starting on one of the local channels, Spencer had moved in a bit closer and was even leaning back against the pillows. Their hips were just a bare inch from touching one another.

Though Remy knew Spencer was still jumpy about touch, he also knew that he wouldn’t get used to it without practice, and he wouldn’t ask for it even if he needed it. Right now, there was no doubt he needed _something_. Even if he hadn’t been able to feel the need echoing out of Spencer, he still would’ve known. He was getting better about reading the man’s body language as they got to know one another. The subtle way that Spencer had curved towards him wasn’t something he would’ve noticed when they first met. Now, he saw it and recognized it for what it was. Spencer was wanting to touch and was restraining himself from doing it. In the back of his mind, Remy wondered just what the hell had happened to this man to make him so damn shy about touching. But, like always when that thought came to him, he pushed it back to think about later.

Remy tossed the remote onto the nightstand between the two queen beds and then sat back against the pillows, lifting one arm and casually dropping it around Spencer’s shoulders as he did. Of course Spencer jumped when he did it. Wide eyes snuck a quick look up at Remy through his bangs. However, he didn’t pull away. Maybe he figured that it was something Remy needed, or that it was just casual and silly to protest over. Or maybe he just knew he needed the touch and was smart enough not to protest now that he had it. Who knew? Who cared? Point was, he didn’t shrug Remy’s touch off, and the both of them were relaxing just a bit at the contact. They’d both been trying to minimize touching today while around the others and it had taken a bit of a toll on them.

Remy kept his eyes on the TV and tried to let himself get lost in the start of the movie. Neither of them said a word, simply sitting together and watching the movie. Right now, he knew that words weren’t what Spencer needed. They wouldn’t help undo that knot that was inside of him. They wouldn’t help strengthen all those fragile places inside that Remy could sense. No, the best thing he could do right now was give Spencer support and strength, silently.

It seemed to be just the right thing to do. Five minutes into the movie, Spencer started to lean towards him slightly until he was resting against him instead of beside him. Five minutes after that and the weight against Remy’s side grew a little heavier and the bundle of emotions that was Spencer in his mind grew a little fuzzier. Spencer was falling asleep. Ten minutes later when Logan came out of the bathroom, dressed in a pair of sweats and with a towel around his shoulders, Spencer had turned completely towards Remy and was curled up against his side, his head down to pillow on Remy’s chest and one arm thrown across Remy’s waist.

Logan arched one eyebrow in surprise. “Looks like you got yourself a leech there, Gumbo.”

That was putting it mildly. Asleep, Spencer didn’t have the reservations he did while awake. Remy had already learned that. His mind wasn’t telling him not to touch or that he should keep a distance or whatever else it told him that had him so shy about accepting even a hand in his. Asleep, his body reached out for what it needed and latched on. Proof to point, one of Spencer's legs slid up and over, dropping down between Remy’s legs and pinning his one to the bed. He looked down at the man plastered to his side and smiled. With one hand, he lightly stroked over Spencer's hair. “He needs de contact right now an Remy don’t mind none.”

“He okay?”

“He will be.” Remy answered. He kept stroking at Spencer's hair, finding the gesture soothing. “He’s hurtin’ a whole hell of a lot more dan he’s showing.”

Logan sat down on the other bed and absently dried his hair while he looked at the sleeping man against Remy. “The case that bad? We didn’t catch a whole lot, stuck back the way we were.”

“Bad enough. _Mais_ I t’ink it’s more his shields. Dey been getting pounded de whole day, bad enough to give _me_ a headache.”

“Well, he’s resting now. Sounds like the best thing for him.”

The two men settled in to watch their movie and quiet fell over the room. The peace was broken once for the arrival of their pizzas. Remy tossed Logan his wallet and the older man paid for the food before bringing it in and setting a box on the nightstand between them. Remy ate one handed, his other hand running idly through Spencer's hair. It was a nice, peaceful way to unwind at the end of the day. Good movie, good friends, good food. Remy felt Spencer sigh and nuzzle in a little and he couldn’t help but smile down at him. His expression softened with the affection that filled him. He didn’t even think about it as he bent down and pressed a soft kiss to the crown of Spencer's head. Then he laid his cheek over that spot and, content, he tuned back in to the movie.

CXCX

Once again, Spencer woke up draped over top of a solid warmth that was starting to become very familiar to him. _This is beginning to become a habit_ , he thought to himself. _I think it’s one I could get used to._ That surprised him. Still mostly asleep, he turned that thought over a few times in his mind. This had to be some benefit of the bond. Maybe he was beginning to recognize Remy on a subconscious level. Their bond allowed him to sense just how close they were to one another. It would make sense that he was learning to recognize it even in his sleep. The action was starting to become instinctive. Or maybe it had something to do with knowing that Remy had been there when he’d fallen asleep. That first night when Remy had climbed into his bed, he’d done it once Spencer was asleep, so Spencer hadn’t known until he woke up.

Interesting. He might have to ask Remy if he was willing to help him test this. He could have Remy slip in at night, on an unplanned night so that Spencer wouldn’t be prepared for it, and they could see how Spencer reacted in the morning. Of course, they’d have to make sure that Spencer's gun wasn’t anywhere nearby.

“Y’ know…” Remy’s drawled out, his voice husky from sleep. “After dat first night, I keep expecting y’ t’ react badly again, _mais_ instead y’r snuggly.”

Those words were so in tune with Spencer's thought that he had to lift his head enough that he could open his eyes and look up at Remy’s face. He wasn’t surprised to find those demon eyes watching him. “Are you reading my mind?”

That sure shocked him. Remy’s eyebrows shot up and his eyes went from half open to fully open in just a single blink. “ _Quoi? Non_! Aint no telepat’, me.” His expression changed and comprehension lit his eyes. “Y’ was t’inking bout de same t’ing, eh?”

The shock had been too strong to be anything but genuine. Eased by that, Spencer relaxed once more. He turned himself a little and folded his arms over Remy’s chest and rested his chin on them. It let him look up at him while still being comfortable. “I was.”

“And what’d y’ come up wit’, den?”

“It obviously has to be another thing we can attribute to our bond.”

“Y’ don’t t’ink dat it’s just y’ getting comfortable with Remy?”

Spencer shook his head. “No. Well, not _just_ that. I am getting comfortable with you and that probably has a small bearing on it. However, it’s not just that, because I’ve been comfortable around my team for years now, and even more so around Morgan, and I’ve never let any of them get close to me while I sleep. They all know to wake me up by calling out to me ever since the time that Morgan tried to shake me awake and I gave him a black eye and almost broke his nose.”

Laughter bubbled up from Remy and made his chest shake under Spencer. “Seriously?”

“Mm hm. My shields weren’t even up that strong at the time, either, so I should’ve been able to sense that it was him, but it took a bit for it to really sink in who it was. With you, though, I know it’s you before I even open my eyes. I think that the information I gain from our bond is now registering at a subconscious level, not just a conscious one. My mind is recognizing your presence without me even being aware of it.”

Remy looked a little pleased by that. Seeing that set Spencer's mind to thinking again. He was a little more awake and more alert now and other thoughts were starting to make their way in. Things that he’d been wondering about for days now and just hadn’t brought himself to talk about. Here, lying like this, with this relaxed and comfortable feel to the morning, it didn’t seem strange to bring them up. Spencer tipped his head so his cheek was resting on his hands instead of his chin. It also allowed his messy hair to slightly shelter his face. “You seem pleased by the fact that I recognize your presence and relax around you.”

“ _Oui_.” Remy said simply.

“Are you really, I mean…are you really as okay with all of this as you seem? You haven’t panicked about this, haven’t yelled or cursed or anything like that. You just seem to take this all as it comes and you treat it like it’s the most normal thing in the world.”

This time Remy didn’t answer right away. He laid there quietly and stared at Spencer for long enough that Spencer had to fight not to fidget. Just when he would’ve given in and started to move around or babble, Remy finally spoke. “It aint dat it’s any easier fo’ me, or dat I t’ink it’s just normal. I’m scared sometimes too, cher. Scared and angry at dis t’ing dat’s taken over our lives. I worry, just like y’ do, about what it’s gonna mean fo’ us. Are we ever gonna be able to be apart at all? How are we gonna live like dis? Am I gonna be able to go on missions again? Are we gonna be able to have relationships when we’re tied toget’er so tightly? I worry about all dat.”

“You don’t show it.”

“ _Je sais_.” Shifting around a little, Remy tucked one hand behind his head, elevating him just enough that he could better see Spencer. His other hand came down and deliberately brushed Spencer's hair back from his face. He ended up resting that hand alongside Spencer's head so he could toy with his hair a little as he spoke, something that Spencer was already coming to realize was a habit Remy liked to indulge in. He loved putting his hands in Spencer's hair. “De life I grew up in weren’t de best, Penny. Between some bad t’ings in m’ early years and den de years on de streets, t’ings were bad. Dey got better when I was ten and Jean-Luc adopted me, _mais_ even den dey wasn’t perfect. A lesson I learned early on was dat shit was gonna happen and dere weren’t not’ing I could do about it. I can’t control de shit dat decides to come m’ way. What I can control is how I react to it. I could curse like y’ said, or be pissed, or t’row a tantrum wort’y of a _bébé_. _Mais, pourquoi?_ It aint gonna change it. Y’ just gotta learn to roll wit’ de punches.”

Spencer was both impressed by Remy’s words and saddened by them. He’d figured out from little things that he’d watched or things he’d heard that Remy hadn’t had it easy when he was younger. He hadn’t figured he would with those eyes of his. But to hear it said bluntly like that made his heart ache a little. However, he wasn’t stupid enough to let it show for too long, or to offer any words of sorrow. Remy would only see those as pity and Spencer knew the man well enough at least to know that he’d loathe any form of pity.

Instead, he met honesty with honesty. Best that they both knew what they were getting into here. “I learned at a young age that giving up any form of control was like handwriting an invitation to be hurt. This whole thing, it scares me because it takes away that control without giving me a choice in the matter. I feel like I’m constantly waiting for the next blow, knowing all the while that I’m not going to be able to stop it.”

This time it was Remy who was aching. Spencer could feel it in the man. To his immense gratitude, Remy said nothing. He just continued to fiddle with Spencer's hair and watch him with that same, steady gaze. That gave Spencer the time to gather his strength and say something very important; something that he felt Remy needed to know and have a chance to respond to before anyone else. But Spencer couldn’t actually look at him as he said it. His eyes dropped down, fixing on the shirt right below him. “I’m going to go talk with the team before we all gather for breakfast. I need to…to tell them that I’m not coming back. I need to arrange my resignation.”

That broke Remy’s silence and drew two soft words from him. “Oh, cher.” That was all. Just those two words. They were enough, though.

Spencer licked dry lips and pushed back the grief that was trying to well up. “I was already starting to think this way, but yesterday’s events really brought it home for me.”

“What’re y’ talking about?”

A sigh slid from Spencer. Time for a little more of this blunt honesty they had going on this morning. “Remy, as much as you didn’t want me in there without you, I didn’t want to be in there without you even more.” He finally lifted his eyes off of Remy’s shirt and back up to his face. “It makes absolutely no sense. I had my team there, people I’ve trusted my life to time and time again without hesitation, and yet all I wanted was you at my back. It wasn’t a practical, logical decision. It wasn’t a tactical one. It was a deep rooted need, almost an instinct, and something tells me that that’s never going to change. Maybe we’ll learn to be able to be farther apart. Maybe we’ll even learn to be in separate states at some point, who knows. But I have a feeling we’ll never get rid of that _need_ for one another. It seems to have been burned into us with the rest of the bond.”

There was no chance for Remy to reply. All of a sudden the hotel room door opened and Logan came strolling in carrying a tray with cups of coffee on it. “Rise and shine, brats. I come bearing coffee.”

Spencer fought back the urge to sigh as he pushed himself up off of Remy. Their quiet, lazy time was over. Time to sit up and face the day, no matter how little he wanted to. The urge was there to ignore everything. To just lie back down against Remy’s chest and pull the blanket over his head like a child. But Spencer hadn’t indulged in that kind of behavior since he was six years old; he wasn’t going to start again now. With a strength he’d learned at far too young an age, he forced himself to put aside what he wanted to do and instead turned his attention to what he needed to do. There was a lot to get done today. Best to get it started.

CXCX

Telling the team went about as well as Spencer had imagined it would. He’d known that they wouldn’t react well to his quitting. Just how upset they were, though, actually made him feel just slightly good, as bad as that sounded. A part of him had been hurting quite a bit inside at how easily his team had just sent him off with the X-Men before. He’d been half-afraid that they’d react the same way now and just hug him and wave goodbye. So when they all broke into instant protests, talking almost overtop one another as they tried to figure out ways to help him stay, it took away a little bit of the ache and healed over one of those broken spots.

He had to wait for their questions and suggestions to die down before he could finally get a word in edgewise. “I’m sorry, guys.” He said, silencing them all. Five sets of eyes locked on him and he shuffled a little in his seat. They’d all gathered in Aaron’s room to do this, at Spencer's request. He’d taken one of the chairs against the wall to grant himself a little distance from the others and their emotions. It hadn’t helped. Even here, he was feeling it pretty strongly. He added a little more strength to his shields. “I’m sorry.” He repeated. “However, this is the only logical response. No one has been able to figure out a way to break this bond without destroying either one of us and I can’t work while it’s there.”

“Why not?” Ashley asked. “You did great yesterday.”

Spencer shook his head at her. “No I didn’t, not really. Besides, that was entirely different. Remy was here, each step of the way. We never went too far apart from one another. We _can’t_ be too far apart. That seems to be a part of things. We’ve been practicing at separating and so far we’ve managed to increase that distance just the slightest bit. However, if we get too far apart, I start getting physical symptoms much like withdrawal. The further apart, the worse it gets. Eventually, my shields start to weaken and then fall.”

“Seriously?” Derek asked, surprised.

“But you two separated before.” Emily pointed out. “Back when you left the hospital, Reid. We went to the hotel while he stayed with his friends. You didn’t seem to have any problems then except some agitation.”

He hadn’t thought of that. Spencer blinked a few times in surprise as that little fact settled over him. How had he forgotten that? It didn’t make any sense. He pondered it for a moment before filing it away for later. “I don’t know. I don’t know why it was different then compared to now. Maybe things were still too new. Maybe this bond hadn’t, I don’t know, settled in yet. I don’t have all the answers, guys. Honestly, right now, I barely have any. The more answers we get, the more questions we seem to find.”

“But quitting seems like such a drastic measure, Reid.” Dave pointed out.

He didn’t get a chance to respond. Aaron held up a hand, silencing the group and calling attention to himself. He looked right to Spencer, for the moment ignoring the others like they weren’t even there. “I agree with Dave here, Reid. Quitting is a drastic measure. For all you know, two months down the road you two could figure this whole thing out and you could return back to work. Only, if you quit, that job won’t be there anymore.”

“I don’t see any other way, Hotch.” Didn’t they understand that he didn’t _want_ to do this?

“Why don’t I process you on extended leave for the next two months?” Aaron suggested, surprising him. “At the end of those two months, we’ll meet again and reevaluate the situation. If at that time you still feeling that quitting is the best option, I’ll support you in it. I want you to have time to work on this, Reid. There’s no need to make any hasty decisions.”

Hasty? They thought this was hasty? Spencer had been thinking about this nonstop ever since it had all started. He’d thought about it until his head throbbed and his heart ached. This wasn’t some hasty decision. Spencer had thought about what Aaron had said, about how this might change in a couple months. But no evidence supported that. Everything he saw, everything he _felt_ , was telling him that this was permanent. Two days, two months, two years; no amount of time would matter. This was his life now. At best, they could learn to control it, to live with it, but he felt deep down inside that they would never learn how to take it away. And he had to admit to himself that even if they did learn how to break the bond, he might not do it. He and Remy both seemed to have negative reactions to even just talking about breaking it. If it came down to it, he honestly couldn’t say that his instincts wouldn’t take over and get him and his partner far away and safe. This bond wasn’t just something that was in him. It had become _part of_ him. As vital as the air he breathed.

But there was no way he could explain that to them. He would never be able to get his friends to understand it. Looking from face to face, all he saw was love. Love from friends that had become like family. And inside, Spencer felt his heart break a little more. He was about to lose the closest family he’d ever had. Oh, not intentionally. They’d all claim that they’d stay in contact. They’d make plans to get together now and then. But life would separate them. They were profilers, busy people who were rarely ever home. He was going to be in New York with Remy, doing who-knows-what. Their lives just weren’t going to mesh. Despite best intentions, they would all start to drift away. Six months from now, they’d maybe exchange phone calls here and there. Then it would regress to just cards at the holidays. It was just the way of life, even amongst family.

Spencer held all of that grief down inside and refused to let it show in his eyes. There was no need to foist his pain off on them. No call to make them hurt the way that he did. He forced his voice as normal as he could make it. “Okay, Hotch. That sounds great.”

He’d give them their two months. Let them hold on to hope for a little while longer. Those two months apart would start the separation, anyways. It would make it a little easier when they finally realized that they had to let go. For them, things would progress naturally. They’d hurt for a little while but work would take up their time and keep them busy and soon, they’d move on. There was no need for them to hurt right now. Let this be one of the last things he did for them.

As they all smiled, relieved that he was giving them this time, Spencer made his own lips curve. Inside, he cried.


	12. Chapter 12

Saying goodbye to the team and watching them go was one of the harder things that Spencer had to do. What came next, he knew, would be even harder. There was one important thing he needed to do before he could leave Vegas. One thing that he didn’t really want to have to do in front of anyone else. Yet he didn’t really have a choice. There was no way he could hide it from Remy; not with them being unable to be apart. However, he _could_ keep it from the other two. Bodyguards or no, there were some things that needed to be private. This was one of them.

He waited until the BAU team was gone before he turned to Jean, Logan and Remy and told them of his plans. “I have one thing that I need to take care of before we go back.”

“Sure thing, Spencer.” Jean said, smiling.

Now, to give them the part they wouldn’t like. “Without you guys.” He saw the protests build almost instantly and he hurried to continue before they could speak. “I need to go see my mother.”

That shut them up quick enough. He could see them debating it between one another. There was a certain feel that a telepath got when they were mindspeaking someone else. Jean had that feeling right at the moment, telling him that she was talking with Logan. He knew she wasn’t talking with Remy. He always knew when someone reached out to Remy’s mind; he would feel Remy lower his shields enough to let the person in. It wasn’t hard to guess what Logan and Jean were saying to one another. They were probably figuring that there was no serious trouble that a person could get into while visiting their mother. Plus, they would want to respect him enough to give him privacy to visit with her. They wouldn’t understand _why_ he wanted that privacy, though. Let them think what they want so long as they understood that, in the end, they _were_ staying here. On this he would be firm. He wasn’t taking them there with him. One, it was none of their business. Two, he didn’t need to bring this many people to Bennington with him. No need to confuse or upset his mother or anyone else.

It only took a moment before Jean and Logan turned their attention back to Spencer. Jean was wearing that motherly smile she tended to get when she was around Spencer. He found it amusing to realize that Jean spent a lot of time looking at him like he was her wayward child or something like that. “Of course we’ll give you privacy for that. We’re sorry, Spencer. We didn’t mean to seem like we were smothering you. Trouble just seems to follow our group around and we’d like to keep it from finding you two right now.”

“I understand.” And he did. Really, he did. “I doubt there’s going to be any trouble, though, and if any does come, I have every confidence that we’ll be able to handle it. Remy wouldn’t let anything happen to us, anyways.” He said that calmly and with confidence, firmly believing it. He knew that Remy would keep them safe. Beside him, he felt Remy’s warm pleasure at Spencer's words, plus a small hint of pride that swelled in him.

There was no point in waiting around to do this. Five minutes later, the two men were leaving the hotel. They took the rental car that Jean had leased when they’d arrived yesterday. The other two assured them that they would be fine without it for a few hours. Spencer was grateful for it. He was equally grateful for the silence on the ride over. Seeing his mother under normal circumstances took a bit of preparation on his part. Not just preparing to see her this way, which always got to him, but preparing his shields to withstand her emotions and the emotions of the others in the hospital. It was always difficult for him. Mental patients generally felt things stronger and more erratically than the average person. With his empathy stronger than before, there was no telling just how bad it was going to be.

They were almost there when Spencer spoke. Thinking about his shields had made him realize something. Eyes on the road, he tightened his hands on the wheel a bit. “Where we’re going, it’s usually a bit of a strain on my shields.” He didn’t look over at Remy as he spoke; didn’t even acknowledge the man. It was much easier to watch the road and focus on his driving. “With my empathy being stronger than before, there’s a chance things might be hard at first. I just, wanted to warn you.”

“ _Merci_.”  A hand settled on his thigh and gave a soft squeeze. “Y’ take strength as y’ need it, cher. I don’t mind.”

This time it was Spencer's turn to say “Thank you.”

He blew out a breath as he took the next turn. They were almost there. Just a few more minutes and they’d be pulling in to the parking lot. Maybe he should warn Remy before they got there, just so the man could be prepared. He and Spencer had become good enough at minimal separation that Remy should be able to safely stay in the car while Spencer went inside, if he wanted to. To make that decision, he would have to know what they would be going in to. Spencer just hated having to explain this to anyone. A hint of shame coiled in his stomach. Why did he have such a hard time telling anyone about his mother? It wasn’t her fault she was sick. He shouldn’t hide her like she was some dirty little secret. How fair was that? How fair was it to her to have a son that treated her like she was something shameful? Diana Reid was a wonderful, brilliant woman. She just happened to be ill. That didn’t completely define who she was, though. It had affected her life, made things different and difficult, yet there had been great moments for them too. But, for all her good moments, there were bad too, and those were the ones that worried Spencer now. No matter how ashamed it made him feel, he didn’t want Remy to see her like that.

“Spencer.” Remy’s hesitant voice broke into Spencer's thoughts. “Do y’ want Remy to stay in de car when y’ go in?”

Once again, Remy was showing this new uncanny ability to speak about the things that were going through Spencer's mind. Sighing, Spencer took the last curve. Benning was just a few minutes down the road now. Remy probably wouldn’t realize that’s where they were going to until they pulled in. Even then, he might not understand right away. That gave Spencer time to find the words he wanted. “Honestly, I thought about asking you. Not because of you or I, but because I’m not sure how my Mom is going to be. I don’t know what kind of day she’s having and I won’t know until we arrive. My mom…” Now or never. Spencer could see Bennington, now. Time to get this out in the open. His hands tightened a little on the wheel. “My mom is sick.”

“ _Je suis désolé,_ cher.”

“She’s been sick my whole life. I’m used to handling her good days and her bad days. But if she’s having a bad day, I can’t say how she’ll react to you. Or to your eyes.” Out of the corner of his eye he saw Remy flinch ever so slightly, echoed emotionally in their bond, and he hurried to explain. Time to lay out all his cards. “It’s nothing against you or her, Remy. Mom suffers from paranoid schizophrenia. In her normal state of mind she wouldn’t have any issues with your eyes. Of that I am absolutely positive. But if she’s not doing well today, if her delusions are bad, there’s no telling what her mind is going to come up with if she sees them. I just, I wanted to warn you. I don’t want her to inadvertently offend you. She would be mortified later if she learned that she did something to hurt someone.”

Because he was expecting it, the pity he felt from Remy didn’t bother him. There was sadness and understanding mixed in with it as well. Then it was all washed away under a wave of affection and support. Spencer basked in it, amazed. How on earth did Remy manage to do that? To just throw his support so easily and quickly behind Spencer? The hand that was still resting on Spencer's thigh gave another squeeze. “Remy can keep his sunglasses on, on problem, cher. An if somet’ing happens, don’t y’ worry about it. Won’t take no offense, me.”

“Thank you, Remy.” He was insanely relieved to have Remy agreeing to come in with him.

Soon there was no more waiting. They were there and inside the building, checking in at the front desk, and Spencer was quietly leading Remy through the familiar halls and to the day room where he’d been told he could find his mother. Spencer didn’t realize that he was holding his breath until he caught sight of his mom and his breath slipped from him in a low whoosh. Diana was sitting at a table over by the window, a notebook in front of her, writing away. Her posture was good, her head cocked to the side in that familiar way of hers that she had when she was thinking about something, and there was a hint of a smile gracing her lips. Spencer recognized the body language and knew that today was a good day for her. Her eyes as they ran over whatever she was writing were clear.

She didn’t look up until Spencer was right beside the table. It must’ve been his shadow touching the table that caught her attention. When she looked up, an instant smile lit her face. “Spencer.”

He returned her smile. Bending, he gave her a hug and accepted her kiss to his cheek as well as the swell of emotions he always thought of as an empathic ‘hug’. “Hey, Mom.”

“Hey, baby. What’re you doing here?”

“We just wrapping up a case with a missing kid. He’s at home with his family now.” Spencer explained. Drawing in a breath, he reached back to Remy and brought the man forward. “I have someone with me I’d like you to meet, Mom. This is my friend, Remy. Remy, this is my mother, Diana Reid.”

Remy put on his most charming smile and reached out for Diana’s hand. When she gave it to him, he bent over it and pressed a kiss against the back of it. “It’s a pleasure to meet y’, _madame._ ”

“Aren’t you a charming one?” Diana said. Still, she smiled prettily up at him. “It’s nice to meet you too, Remy. It’s always good to meet Spencer's friends.”

Letting go of her hand, Remy didn’t hesitate to slip down into the chair right across from her. He folded his arms on the tabletop and fixed his attention on her. “Y’ve raised a wonderful son. He’s a joy to know.”

“I can’t take the credit for that. Spencer didn’t get much help from me. He pretty much raised himself. Still, he turned into quite a man, didn’t he?” She looked up at Spencer. “Why are you still standing there, baby? Sit down.”

Spencer resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Smothering a smile, he slipped down into the seat next to her. She watched him as he did and her smile started to melt away. A look of worry took its place. She leaned towards him, eyebrows drawing down slightly. “What’s wrong, baby? What happened?”

He should’ve known. No matter what, Diana always knew when there was something wrong with him. “I just know.” She’d tell him.  But he couldn’t tell her everything that was going on. Even if he wanted to, it wasn’t smart. There were too many things that he couldn’t risk her letting slip when she wasn’t in her right mind. Spencer drew on skills he’d learned at a young age and he gave her a partial answer without telling her the parts he didn’t want her to know. “It’s just been a rough couple days, Mom. I’ve decided to leave the BAU.”

“Good.” She said promptly. “I don’t like you working there.”

“I know, Mom.”

“Have you figured out what you’re going to do next? All those brains, there are so many things you can do. You can do anything you put your mind to.”

That brought a hint of Spencer's smile back. She’d always been one of his biggest advocates. No matter what he wanted to try, she’d always backed him. Even when it was ridiculous. He’d never met anyone in his life as supportive as his mother. “You’re a Mom, you’re required to say that.” He teased her.

“Absolutely.” Humor sparkled in her eyes. “It doesn’t make it any less true, though. You’ve always been able to do great things, baby.” She turned her smile towards Remy. “Did you know that he started playing cards when he was just four? And I’m not talking about go-fish or old maid. No, his Uncle taught him how to play poker before he passed away. By the time he was five, he didn’t just play, he could win, too! I remember one time…”

Spencer watched as Diana regaled an eagerly listening Remy with tales from Spencer's childhood. There was a nice feeling inside of Spencer at seeing these two talking this way. They’d been lucky that today was a good day for Diana. He was glad that Remy was having the chance to meet her while she was happy and lucid. It seemed anymore that those good days were getting fewer and further between. But today she was here, she was lucid, even more so than she’d been for a while. He closed his eyes and opened himself up ever so slightly. With a bit of Remy’s strength to help him, he kept shielding the rest of the room, only opening himself to feeling his mother. Whether it was because she was his mother or because Spencer had spent the most time around her and was therefore attuned to her, he’d always found it easy to reach out with his empathy and connect to Diana. He let the familiar feel of her emotions wash over him, chasing away some of the ache inside. As always he could tell that she felt what he was doing. She’d never tried to shut him out or asked him not to do this. In fact, she did the same thing now that she’d always done. As soon as she felt him connect with her, she sent him wave after wave of love, a love he’d always been able to count on being there. Even when she was at her worst that love was always in her.

Something else was there, though. Spencer tuned out whatever she and Remy were saying now and focused more on what he was feeling. There was that same shadow over her emotions, a slight twist to them that he’d always thought of as her illness. It was stronger when she was having a bad day. He could read it now more than ever. It wasn’t a shadow. More like, a stain. Like something staining her emotions, changing them, twisting them just slightly. He could sense something else, too. Instinct took over and the connection between them changed a little. Spencer delved into it in a way he hadn’t known was possible. Maybe it hadn’t been, before. He let himself slide down it, down into the very essence of her, and for a moment he seemed to lose track of himself.

A mental ‘touch’ steadied him, keeping him grounded in himself. Spencer recognized that feel as Remy and knew that the man was keeping him grounded so that he wouldn’t be lost here. He trusted Remy to keep him safe, both physically and mentally, and gave himself over to what he was sensing from his mother.

Now that he was free to look, so many things were clear. He felt her emotions even stronger than ever. She was tired today. Tired and…sore. Spencer followed that feeling of soreness until he found where it came from. Shock rocked him when he realized that he could actually understand where it came from. He was reading it from her. She had a bruise on her hip that was aching. Without thought, he extended that healing part of him, letting it brush against the place in her that hurt, and he watched with joy as the ache faded away until it was gone and he knew the bruise would be gone now. He felt her relief.

A sudden thought rocked Spencer so much it almost shocked him into dropping the connection. Just barely did he manage to stabilize it. He quickly drew off the strength that Remy was sending him and he used it to steady himself. Then, before he could think it through, he reached out that healing part of himself again, this time wrapping it around that stain that he felt over her emotions. Her illness. He wrapped around it, trying to get around all of it, down to the roots that were settled in her mind. He felt as if he was holding his breath as he did. He was all around it now, the same as he’d been with that sore spot, the same as he’d done when he’d healed Betsy’s hand, only this time, nothing was happening. Spencer fed a little more strength into it. Still, nothing. He fed even more, drawing from the energy inside of himself and feeding more and more into this.

How long he would’ve kept going, he had no idea. He might’ve stayed there until he drained all of his energy if it hadn’t been for Remy. Through their bond, Remy ‘reached’ for him and ‘pulled’ him back, pulling him away from Diana and back out of their connection. Spencer could’ve fought it if he wanted. Instead, he let it happen, pulling out of his connection and settling once more into his own body. When he dropped the connection to his Mom, his body slumped with sudden exhaustion and he knew it was a good thing Remy had pulled him back when he did. He’d burned too much of his own energy.

Spencer opened his eyes and fought back a wince at the bright light. The world returned in a crash of light and sound. His mother was still talking, apparently still telling the same story, and he realized that she hadn’t felt what he’d done there at the end. Not only that, but she was still telling the same story she’d been telling before, meaning that, what had felt like an hour to him had been just minutes here.

Unaware of what had happened or of her son’s grief, Diana turned to him and smiled. It took everything Spencer had to smile back at her. To keep her from seeing the pain in him. Inside, his mind was screaming. Why hadn’t it worked? Schizophrenia was a disease, the same as anything else. Why hadn’t he been able to heal it? Logically, he should be able to. Yet he hadn’t. Was it because it was something that wasn’t curable? Or was this a limit to his power he hasn’t been aware of up until now? Or was it because he didn’t know what he was doing? It just didn’t seem fair. Why couldn’t he heal the one person he desperately wanted to?

Looking across the table, Spencer caught Remy watching him discreetly behind his sunglasses. He could feel the Cajun’s sympathy washing through him. Diana may not have sensed or realized what was going on; Remy had. He offered support in the only way he could. Through their bond and through small touches. Under the table, one of his feet slid forward, hooking behind Spencer's so that they were slightly twined together. Those were the only things that kept Spencer upright. The strength Remy sent him steadied Spencer just enough that he could pull up the façade he’d learned so long ago. He just hoped it would hold.

CXCX

How he got through the rest of that visit, he would never know. By the time they were done and were leaving the building, it was taking everything he had not to collapse. He didn’t protest when Remy took the keys from him, or when Remy tucked him into the passenger’s seat of the car. Spencer's hands fumbled before finally managing to hook his seatbelt. Once he had it hooked, he curled his body inwards. Arms around his waist, knees drawn up to his chest, body curved towards the window. He drew in on himself and tried to shut out the world. Today had just been one blow after another. He couldn’t take it anymore right now. He just couldn’t. Maybe that was pathetic and weak. He didn’t care. His head hurt, his heart ached, and he’d fed too much energy into trying and failing to heal his mother’s mental illness. His defenses were shot. There was no way he could hold up his usual shields now. And, if he were honest, he knew he didn’t have to. Not here. Not now. The only person around was Remy.

Spencer dropped his head down onto his knees and let out a ragged breath. Here, in the safety of the car, away from everyone but one person who he knew would watch over him, he gave up trying to hold himself together. He didn’t cry, didn’t scream or yell. He just gave up the iron control he kept over his emotions. He knew Remy could feel them all right now and he heard the soft gasp from the man beside him as the full force of Spencer's emotions hit him. Then suddenly Remy’s emotions were there, wrapping around him again, sheltering him this time. Soothing him. Spencer didn’t fight it. He let Remy’s mental presence cocoon him until he felt nothing else. Just, peace.


	13. Chapter 13

It was no surprise that Jean was upset when the two men returned. She had sensed them coming and must’ve been able to feel something, though Remy knew she hadn’t gotten past their shields to really _see_ anything. But when he pulled the car into its parking spot, both Jean and Logan were there and Jean looked beyond worried. She rushed forward before the car even fully came to a stop. “What on earth happened?” She demanded when he opened his door.

Remy ignored the look she shot him and he kept the doors locked while he climbed out. He didn’t want her opening up Spencer's door. He didn’t want her near Spencer right now. He didn’t want _anyone_ near his partner right now. Spencer had practically no defenses at the moment. The only thing holding him together and keeping him safe was Remy and that was much easier for Remy to do if he could get skin to skin contact going. He’d been tempted to pull the car overs somewhere and park just so he could gather Spencer in close to him and hold him until this passed. The only thing that had stopped him was that he had a feeling this was going to take more than just a few minutes for Spencer to get past. If it was going to take a bit, Remy wanted Spencer somewhere that he could protect him. A safe, defensible place. Home would be best, but he would settle for the hotel room if he had to. “When we headin’ home?” He asked as he rounded the front of the car.

“Ro and Kurt have the jet nearby. They’re just called in a few minutes ago and let us know that they’re waiting for us.” Jean answered.

Perfect. Remy pulled out the keys when he reached Spencer's side of the car. “ _Bien._ Will one of y’ get our bags fo’ us, den? Spencer needs t’ get home and he aint up fo’ going in dat hotel right now.”

“Remy, what happened?”

Remy just ignored hat question. As he unlocked the car door he heard Logan tell Jean “He aint gonna hear you right now, darlin. Go on and grab their bags, would you? I’ll stick here and watch em.”

That worked for Remy. He trusted Logan to have his back right now. More importantly, he trusted Logan to help protect Spencer, and he was only vaguely surprised to realize that that was more important to him at the moment. Then he pushed that thought away as he finally got the car door open. Spencer was still curled up, the same as he’d been for the whole drive back. Arms around his waist, knees drawn up and forehead on his knees. There was a slight tremble that ran through that slender frame. That was just the physical. It said nothing about what Remy could _feel_ from him. Spencer had spent way too much of his energy in what he’d been doing with his mother. He didn’t have enough left to even hold up the inner shields that he usually kept around his own emotions. For the first time, Remy knew he was truly feeling Spencer, unfiltered. No defenses, no pretenses, just raw emotions. It was staggering.

Empaths, by nature, felt things stronger than the rest of the world. How could they not? They were far more in tune with their emotions than anyone else. But Spencer seemed to draw himself back from feeling things. He blocked other people’s emotions so strongly that it sort of muted his own, and he kept up a shield deep down inside that Remy didn’t think the man even realized he was holding up most of the time. None of those were up now. When he’d finally dropped them, the strength of his feelings had stunned Remy. There had been grief, strong enough that it should’ve sent the man to his knees, and an inner ache that throbbed like an open wound. There was a feel to those pains that showed just how long they’d been living and festering inside of the young man. It wasn’t just fresh pain; it was old, too. A pain that had been a part of him for so long he barely noticed it anymore. Not until it flared up like this and consumed him. There were other things in there, things that brought tears to Remy’s eyes. Shame, guilt, self-loathing, exhaustion, and this overwhelming need to just let go and let someone else take care of this for a while. To stop having to be the strong one for a while. How the hell had the man lived with all of this inside of him and not broken before now? There was hurt after hurt layered through his emotions.

Remy had done the only thing he could think of to do. He’d reached down that bond and sort of drew Spencer in to it, drew him away from that pain and wrapped him in positive emotions like one would wrap a person in a warm quilt. Spencer hadn’t even fought the touch. He’d practically collapsed in to it. Remy could feel it now. If he closed his eyes, he could almost see it. Like a blanket had been wrapped around that little knot of emotions in his mind labelled ‘Spencer’. He kept up the flow of warmth and hoped that it would work to ease the raw spots inside of his partner.

With gentle hands, Remy reached out to Spencer, carefully gathering the man to him. “C’mon, _bébé_. We need to get y’ moved to de backseat.” He murmured gently. Slowly, he drew Spencer's head up from his knees and then helped him to straighten his legs out. It was almost like moving a doll. Spencer went where directed without showing any sign that he even realized what was being done. But when Remy drew him up and out of the car, he finally showed at least a hint of life, leaning in to Remy’s touch. Remy didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around the man. He heard a soft little whimper slip past Spencer's lips that just about broke his heart.  “Ah, Penny.” Remy buried his face against Spencer's hair. He squeezed the man close to him for a moment.

The honk of a horn nearby reminded Remy that they were still out in public right now. This wasn’t the place for this. Drawing in a deep breath, he brought himself back to the moment and once against started to move Spencer. He drew the man in towards the backseat and then climbed in after him. Logan shut the door for him and Remy flashed him a quick look of gratitude through the window. Knowing that Logan was there, firmly standing outside their door, really allowed Remy to relax his guard and focus even more on Spencer. He ignored the seatbelts and instead just drew Spencer into the circle of his arms and cradled the man close to him. It was a good sign of just how much Spencer had let go of his control when he didn’t hesitate to lean in to Remy’s embrace and even wrapped his own arms around the Cajun in return. Another of those painful whimpers slipped from him and Remy tightened his arms in response. “It’s okay, cher. Remy’s got y’. Y’r okay.”

The two stayed wrapped up in one another even as Jean came back and her and Logan loaded the bags into the car. Part of Remy logged away all the little things, taking note of the two getting into the front seat and of the car moving. That part of him noticed all these things and kept watch for any potential threat around them. The rest of him was tuned in to Spencer.

When the car finally stopped, Remy instinctively scanned the area around them, noting that they were at the Blackbird. His scan showed him that there was no one else nearby and no obvious threats were visible. Even so, he kept up a cautious watch when he unloaded he and Spencer from the car. He kept Spencer tucked close against one side, under his arm, and his other hand stayed close to his pocket where he kept his cards. Ahead, there was movement at the ramp of the ‘Bird and Remy instantly tensed in preparation. When he saw it was Ororo, he relaxed and let his hand move away from his pocket. With a low voice he urged Spencer to start to move. “We’re almost to de ‘Bird, cher. Den y’ can sit down and we’ll be on our way home. Just a little further now. Dat’s it, c’mon.”

Ororo’s face was bright with concern when they got close to her. “What happened? Is he okay, brother?”

The only reason that Remy actually answered her was that it was Ororo and he couldn’t just ignore his sister. Anyone else and he would’ve just kept walking. For her, he answered, his voice still holding that same soothing tone that he’d been using to encourage Spencer forward. “He’s shut down, petit. Too many t’ings happening all at once and he couldn’t hold it t’gether no more, so he shut down and gave control over to Remy.” The trust in that was both amazing and humbling.

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

Remy paused them long enough to smile at the woman’s honest offer. “ _Non,_ Stormy. _Mais, merci_. Dere aint not’ing no one else can do. Remy’s shielding him fo’ now and keepin’ him grounded under all de emotions. He just needs a lil time to let de emotions run free b’fore he finds his feet again.”

That was all the time that Remy spared for anyone else. He finished bringing Spencer inside of the jet and took him over to a set of seats that were joined together. It was one space he knew he could keep Spencer up against him while being able to keep watch around them. Spencer continued to move easily under Remy’s direction so long as Remy didn’t try to move them apart. Remy’s description of Spencer having ‘shut down’ was a pretty apt one. He had basically shut himself off from his body at the moment. The core of him, his sense of self, was fully immersed and safely held inside their bond. Remy doubted that Spencer even know where he was at the moment. Some part of him obviously still recognized Remy’s touch and responded to Remy’s voice. But his eyes were closed and had been that way for a while now and he didn’t react to any other sounds around him.

The two sat down in their seats and Spencer once more leaned in. Remy looked around him for a moment before making a decision. The seats they were on were a bench seat, customized to be slightly larger than the others to accommodate the occasional _large_ passenger. One in a while there was a mutant that needed it. Even Hank needed a little more space than the average person in which to sit. That worked to Remy’s advantage now. He kept Spencer seated and rose to his feet. Then, with just a little coaxing, he got Spencer stretched out on the seats with his back facing the rest of the jet. Remy pulled his jacket off next—after pocketing his cards so that he wouldn’t be without them—and he laid it over top of Spencer like a blanket. Now that he was sure Spencer was comfortable and covered, he moved back to the man’s head and carefully lifted both Spencer's head and shoulders and he slipped down into the space and then settled Spencer's head into his lap. For a moment Spencer just laid there. Then one arm snaked out from under the jacket and slipped up, followed soon by the other, and they loosely wrapped around the Cajun’s waist. Remy smiled down at him and readjusted the edge of the coat over Spencer's shoulders so it wouldn’t fall off. “Dat’s it.” He murmured approvingly. “Y’r safe here, cher. Just rest. Remy’s gonna watch over y’.”

How embarrassed was Spencer going to be by all of this when he became coherent once more? He’d already showed just how shy he was and how hesitant he could be about touches. The only time he really seemed to relax in any way about it was when they were alone, or when he was desperate, like right now. Would he be upset with Remy over this? Mad, maybe, that he hadn’t taken them to the hotel room to give him privacy? Remy hoped not. Going to a strange hotel room hadn’t felt like the right thing to do. Everything in him had said to get Spencer to a safe and secure place; what was safer or more secure than the mansion? Or, in lieu of that, the Blackbird, at least until they could get to the mansion. Spencer could be as mad as he wanted when he came back to himself. Remy would apologize for embarrassing him if he had to but he wouldn’t apologize for keeping him safe. Nothing came second to that.

Jean came towards them and Remy felt a soft brush against the edge of their shield. He rebuffed the touch automatically. There was no way in hell he was going to let a mind touch either of theirs right now. That proved to be the smart choice; just the brush of Jean’s touch against their shields was enough to have Spencer giving a soft, painful cry. His arms tightened around Remy and he pulled in even closer. Immediately, Remy clutched at the man with one arm, bending protectively over him at the same time that his other hand dropped to his pocket and a low growl slid from him. “Back off.” He snarled at her. “And keep y’r mind to y’rself.”

Stopping in her tracks a few feet away, Jean held her hands out to either side in the universal gesture of peace. “I wasn’t trying to reach for him, Remy. I wouldn’t dare risk that right now. I was just trying to check on you, that’s all.”

“Y’ got a mouth, don’t y’? Y’ can ask, just like de rest of us gotta.” Temper had his eyes flashing and his lip curling up ever so slightly. For himself, he wouldn’t have snapped like this, not at Jean. But for Spencer, he didn’t even think about it.

His temper seemed to set off Jean’s just slightly. “To check on the bond between you two I _have to_ look, Remy. You know that.”

“Y’ can still ask.” He pointed out. Now that he knew he didn’t have to defend, now that she wasn’t coming closer, he used his free hand to soothingly stroke over Spencer's hair, calming them both. Still, his expression stayed sharp on Jean. “Our minds are our own, and our bond’s a private t’ing, Jeannie. Just checkin’ it over wit’out even asking, dat’s de same as Remy coming and pulling back de curtain an staring at y’ while y’r showering. Y’ wanna look it over, y’ ask, or y’ aint getting nowhere near it no more.” Considering the subject firmly closed, Remy broke his stare and brought his full attention back to the man who was still clutching at him. He didn’t pay any more attention to Jean.

With a soothing murmur and soft touches, plus the steady positive emotions he kept around Spencer, it didn’t take long before Remy finally soothed the man down into sleep. It was a good sleep; a healing one. Remy could actually feel it as Spencer slowly started to steady inside. Little by little, bit by bit, he was re-centering himself and rebuilding his inner defenses.

Around them, the Blackbird gradually came to life, and Remy relaxed just a little. Spencer was safe in his lap, they were on the jet and on their way home, and people that Remy trusted were nearby to help with the watch. He could afford to relax his guard slightly. Closing his eyes, Remy leaned back against the back of the seat and let himself drift as well.

CXCX

Both men woke just before they got back home. Spencer was actually the first one to wake and Remy had been right in his prediction on how Spencer would react to this. Embarrassment was the very first thing to hit him. Oh, God. He couldn’t believe it. There was no confusion as to what had happened. Though he’d been inside of himself, so to speak, he’d still been at least semi-aware of the world around him. Enough so that he knew just how much he’d shut down and just how out of it he’d been. He hadn’t meant for that to happen! And worse, look at him now! He was lying on a bench of seats and was _clinging_ to Remy’s waist like some child. It was mortifying!

The body he was lying against shifted and Spencer felt Remy bend down over hi. If he hadn’t been so embarrassed, he probably would’ve enjoyed that slightly cocooned feeling. Remy brushed a bit of Spencer's hair back from his face and when he spoke, his voice was kept at a low, private whisper. “Don’t stress bout dis, cher. Y’ aint got not’ing to be embarrassed about here. Y’ overloaded and drained y’rself. Y’ just needed time to find y’rself again, dat’s all.”

“But everyone saw me.” Spencer whispered in mortification. He couldn’t bring himself to lift his head from Remy’s waist. In doing so, he would have to face the rest of the world and he didn’t know if he could actually make himself look anyone here in the face. How could he after they’d seen him acting like this? He _loathed_ being weak in front of other people. It didn’t occur to him that he’d been weak in front of Remy, too, and that that didn’t seem to bother him.

The hand in his hair kept up its soothing strokes. “Dey saw someone overloaded by deir powers. It happens to all of us. Y’ got no reason to feel ashamed and anyone dat tries to make y’ feel bad fo’ it, dey can kiss y’r ass, an Remy’s too.” Remy paused when Spencer gave a startled little chuckle. Cupping the side of Spencer's face, he stroked a thumb over his cheekbone. “Y’ held up underneath a hell of a lot of shit fo’ a lot longer dan anyone else would’ve, Spencer. I’d like to see any of dem deal wit’ everyt’ing y’ dealt with lately and _not_ break down a bit. Y’ walk off de jet with y’r chin held high.”

Remy’s support felt like a balm against the parts inside of Spencer that still felt a little raw. Without noticing it, he turned his face in towards Remy’s hand, nuzzling a bit. “Thanks, Remy.” He murmured. “For, you know, everything.”

“Anytime, Spencer.”

Their quite conversation was broken by Logan’s low voice from somewhere nearby. “We’re pulling in, guys.”

Remy uncurled himself from around Spencer's head. “ _Merci,_ Wolvie.”

“Quit calling me that, Cajun.”

“ _Mais,_ it suits y’ so, _mon ami_!”

Logan must’ve made some sort of rude or threatening gesture because Remy started to laugh. “Now, now, dat aint nice! Why y’ t’reaten po’ Remy so, cher?

“’Po Remy’ my ass.” Logan growled out. “And it aint a threat, Gumbo. It’s a promise.”

Spencer started to shift his weight so that he could sit up and Remy didn’t even break stride in his conversation as he helped him. “Y’ can’t hurt Remy, cher.” Remy told him, his hands steadying Spencer while he sat up.

“Oh yeah? Says who?”

“Spencer wouldn’t let y’ hurt Remy.” The Cajun turned to Spencer, who was now fully sitting up next to him. He flashed one of his most charming smiles; one of the ones that never failed to make Spencer want to smile back at him, and took the jacket that Spencer held out to him, putting it on with a flourish. “Aint dat right, Penny? Y’ wouldn’t let de Wolverine hurt y’r po’ lil Remy, now would y’?”

There was no doubt in Spencer's mind that the two men were deliberately playing up their usual banter to try and give him a sense of normalcy. He was absurdly grateful for it. His embarrassment faded some and a little hint of his own humor returned. He arched an eyebrow at his friend. “Continue to call me Penny and you might just find out.”

Loud laughter spilled from Logan. Remy put on a mock offended look. “Can’t believe it, me! Even Remy’s own partner’s turning against him here!”

Amused by Remy’s semi-stunned look, Spencer reached out and patted the man’s hand. “Don’t worry. I’m a healer, remember? I’m sure I can fix you up from whatever Logan does to you.”

Their jokes and laughter continued as the jet was brought in for a landing. When it was finally parked and shut off and the back hatch was open, the pair rose from their seats and Remy and Logan flanked Spencer while they made their way down the ramp. Remy draped an arm around Spencer's shoulders and Spencer left it there, enjoying the comfort of the touch. He still felt far too raw inside from the day he’d had. While his little nap on the Blackbird had helped him to center himself once more and erect some of his shielding, it had by no means fully fixed the broken places inside. Spencer was still very, very fragile and both he and Remy knew it.

They were halfway down the ramp when the hanger door opened. Everyone looked up to see who was coming and Spencer felt Remy freeze beside him. Shock and worry both poured off the man. In response, Spencer inched just a little closer, letting their hips bump together. At the same time, he looked over the newcomer, trying to figure out what it was that had set Remy off. It didn’t take him but a second to figure it out. He’d heard enough about the woman to recognize her as she strolled across the room. The white streak in her hair was a definite giveaway. This was Rogue. Remy’s _girlfriend_. Her face had been happy when she first came in. Now her eyes were narrowing and her expression had turned slightly cold as she looked over Remy and Spencer and, more importantly, how close they were to one another.

The door snapped open once more and this time it was Scott who came rushing in. His emotions were full of urgency that quickly changed to dismay and then to worry and resignation both. If he had to hazard a guess, Spencer would say that Scott had been trying to get to them to warn them that Rogue was here, hoping to catch them before she did.

“What’s going on here?” Rogue demanded, striding towards them. She stopped at the bottom of the ramp and crossed her arms over her chest while glaring up at them.

In response to the obvious animosity, Spencer longed to step closer to Remy, wanting the contact. His brain knew better, though. Instead of stepping _closer_ , he stepped _away_ , pulling out from under Remy’s arm. To his surprise, Remy let him go. He’d been sure that Remy would try and stop him from moving away the way he usually did. Then the Cajun took a step forward and to the side so that he was discreetly placed between Spencer and Rogue without actually standing right between them. A swell of emotions followed in their bond and Spencer understood. Ahhhh. The protector in Remy was rearing his head. Something about the situation had set him off. “Roguie. Dis is _mon ami_ , Spencer.”

“Spencer.” Rogue’s lip curled up a little and her nose wrinkled as if she were smelling something particularly foul. Her eyes ran over him from head to toe and Spencer was left with the distinct feeling that her gaze has assessed him and found him lacking. That was cemented by the way she turned towards Remy and basically dismissed Spencer from her presence. Spencer noted that and the clear animosity that was just radiating from her, as well as another emotion that had him taking another small step away from Remy. Jealousy. Jealousy was threaded through her emotions in a thin enough thread that he doubted even she knew that it was what she was feeling.

Spencer wasn’t the only one to notice her little snub. Remy noticed it as well and a hiss escaped him at the insult of it. The protector in him came a little more to the forefront, sharpening his emotions, and Spencer knew he had to get this under control before the man said or did something he would regret later. It was obvious that Rogue didn’t know what was going on and she was just reacting—albeit, badly—to seeing her boyfriend snuggled up with another man and laughing. Her jealousy was completely understandable.

Discreetly, Spencer reached out and brushed his fingers against Remy’s back, drawing his attention. Red and black eyes flashed back towards him. Spencer saw the dangerous look that sat there and he knew he was right; this situation needed to be diffused, fast. “She doesn’t know what’s going on, Remy.” He told the man quietly. “Why don’t the two of you go catch up and talk about things? I’m tired anyways and I thought I’d just go lay down for a while.”

Remy’s eyes darted back over to Rogue and then back to Spencer. “Remy should stay wit’ y’.” That was his discreet way of pointing out that Spencer still wasn’t steady, nor was he fully settled inside.

The emotional part of Spencer wanted nothing more than to agree with Remy. To hell with Rogue and what she felt or wanted. That part wanted to tell Remy to take him upstairs where they could curl up once more and Remy could hold him the way that he had on the jet, the way he had this morning in bed, and keep holding him until the raw places inside finally healed over. As usual, that part of him lost. There was no way Spencer could be that selfish. “I’m tired, Rem. All I plan on doing is sleeping. I’m sure Logan won’t mind escorting me up to my room and then I promise, I’ll shut and bar my door and I’ll be dead to the world in minutes. I just need some sleep right now.”

He could see the debate on Remy’s face and could feel the parts of him debating inside. It wasn’t fair to make Remy make this kind of choice when he was so obviously torn between them. Spencer drew in a breath and took matters into his own hands. He put his hand on Remy’s shoulder and gave him a squeeze, backed by a flow of understanding and support. “Go talk to her, Remy. You can find me when you’re done, if you want. I give you permission to slip the lock and come in my room. I promise, I won’t draw a gun on you this time.” That last bit was tossed out just to get a smile, which it did. Smiling back, Spencer gave one last squeeze and then dropped his hand. He turned to Logan before Remy could begin to think to protest. “Would you mind walking me upstairs, Logan?”

“No problem, Stretch.” Logan answered, just as Spencer had known he would.

Together, the two set off down the last of the ramp, and Spencer made sure to keep a bit of distance between him and Rogue. Her animosity was growing and he didn’t want to be any closer to it than he had to. He felt like it was going to choke him. He was grateful that he had Logan at his side to act as a sort of buffer. As he crossed the hanger, he tried not to think about how much he wished it wasn’t Logan at his side.


	14. Chapter 14

Determination carried Spencer out of the hanger and up to the main part of the house. It was when he was at the staircase that led upstairs that his body finally won out over his determination. The only thing that kept his knees from melting out underneath him completely was his quick reflexes. His hand darted out to grab the bannister and he used that to keep upright. Logan reacted just as quickly. His hand caught Spencer's elbow and helped to steady and support him. “Woah there, Stretch.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Embarrassed, Spencer tried to force his legs to straighten. His knees felt like they were made of jelly.

Logan looked him over with a sweep of his eyes. “You shouldn’t be up yet.”

He didn’t bother denying it. “Can’t lie down until I reach my room.”

“Then let’s get you to your room.”

Before Spencer realized what the man meant to do, Logan pulled up on Spencer's elbow and then ducked down under his arm. One solid arm went around Spencer's waist, a hand settling on his hip, and Logan basically took the brunt of Spencer's weight. As much as Spencer wanted to pull away, to insist that he could do this on his own, he knew that he couldn’t. There was no way he was going to make it up those stairs on his own. He’d spent too much energy back there trying to appear steady in front of Remy. Plus, feeling the strong emotions from Remy and keeping them from overwhelming him were taking away some of the energy that he’d managed to gain back.

It took twice as long as it should’ve for them to get up the staircase. Finally, they reached the top. “Just another hallway, kid, that’s it.” Logan reassured him.

Thank God for that. Spencer didn’t bother trying to reply. He doubted he had the energy to walk and talk at the same time. He just clung to Logan and prayed that no one would come out and see them as they made their way down the hall. Luck was with them in that, at least. They got to Spencer's room without anyone seeing them. When Spencer finally reached his bed and could collapse down on it, he gave a sigh of relief.

Logan crossed his arms over his chest and watched Spencer carefully as the genius scooted himself back towards the head of the bed. Spencer didn’t look up at him. He could feel Logan’s emotions and those told him clearly enough what he’d find if he looked up. Logan’s was concerned and worried and just slightly curious. With his inner walls still dangerously low, Spencer didn’t have his usual caution. It prompted him to speak more than he usually might’ve. “I’ll be fine, Logan. I just need some rest and relaxation.”

There was a short pause before Logan apparently gave up and decided to ask his questions. “What happened? Rem said you just sort of shut down on him.”

“I did.” That was an accurate way to describe what he’d done. Spencer adjusted the pillow behind him and then leaned back, trying to snag the blankets from under himself. A helping hand from Logan got them out finally and Spencer didn’t even protest when Logan tugged them away and then draped them over him. Spencer caught the blankets and pulled them up to his waist. There, settled back against the head of the bed with his pillow behind him and his blankets over him, he looked up at Logan and tried not to feel like some weak little invalid. “My own strong emotions can affect my empathy and my shields. Between things with the team and the visit with my mother, too many things battered at me and I was losing myself underneath the strong emotions. I couldn’t separate myself from them anymore. I didn’t have the energy to even hold my shields up anymore, so they just, crashed. If it wasn’t for Remy, I would’ve been in agony. As it was, he used our bond and sort of, sheltered me in there, keeping the core of me safe while the rest of my body rested and recovered enough energy to start rebuilding my walls a little. Does that make any sense?”

“Some.” Logan said. A corner of his mouth quirked up. “More than it did before. You might find yourself explaining it all again, though. ‘Specially to Jeannie.”

Spencer furrowed his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

In short terms, Logan caught Spencer up on the moment between Remy and Jean on the jet. Spencer listened with surprise. He’d known at the time that Remy had been irritated by something, and he definitely remembered the brush against their shields, but he hadn’t been coherent enough at the moment to hear what anyone was saying. He didn’t find himself upset by Remy’s words, though; if anything, he was grateful. “Good for him.” He said before he thought about it.

“What?”

Spencer looked up with surprise. Then he flushed, realizing that he’d said those words out loud. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound rude there. It’s just…you’ve had a telepath in your mind, right?”

Grimacing, Logan nodded. “Yeah.”

“It’s sort of, intimate. Even for just mind speech, you can’t help but feel a sort of intimacy. And why not? Someone’s mind is touching your mind. Those are very private and intimate parts of ourselves.” Spencer's voice changed a little as he got into what he was saying. There was an edge of tiredness to it, but it was steady enough and it took on that tone that he always got when instructing someone. His ‘teacher voice’, as Derek had dubbed it. “For an empath, it’s even more intimate, because emotions are involved. When Jean or Charles step into my mind to speak with me, I don’t get just their thoughts, I get their emotions as well, no matter how well they shield. Charles shields well enough that the emotions aren’t strong enough to hurt me, but I still feel them, even if they are a little fuzzier than normal. Still, you can see how that makes the experience even more intimate.”

“Yeah. I’d never thought of it like that.”

That had Spencer shrugging one shoulder. “You’re not an empath; you wouldn’t have any call to think about it. Even if you did, you wouldn’t have known.”

“This bond thing, I take it it’s even more intimate, then?”

“Exceedingly so.” Spencer said. He caught the edge of the blanket, rolling it around between his fingers in a nervous gesture. Talking about this was akin to talking about his sex life. It just wasn’t something he was typically comfortable doing. But Logan was becoming a pretty good friend, Spencer found, and he was just trying to understand. Not scientifically, not to try and fix things, not to try and find a way to break the bond. He was just trying to understand as a friend. That made all the difference in the world. It made Spencer _want_ to talk about this instead of feeling like he _had to_. “I don’t think that we’ve managed to make anyone understand just how intense this ‘bond’ is. There’s nothing more intimate to us. It doesn’t just allow us to feel each other’s emotions. In that bond is the very essence of who we are. When Jean or Charles check it over, even just lightly, it’s…” Words failed him. How on earth could he describe this? How could he make anyone understand just how it made him feel? How it made Remy feel? “My bond with Remy is more personal, more intimate, than any sexual encounter I’ve ever had. It’s more private to me than any part of my body.”

The room went quite for a long moment. The emotions from the feral man were almost contemplative. When Spencer dared to look up, he found Logan’s expression thoughtful. “So,” Logan finally drawled out. Blue eyes landed on Spencer, their gaze intense. “What you’re saying is basically that when they reach out and check your bond without asking, it’s the equivalent of rape.”

That was such a blunt way of putting it. Spencer flushed and dropped his gaze down to the bedspread. “They don’t really mean it to be.” He prevaricated. Causing trouble wasn’t his goal here. “The light touches and checks aren’t that bad. They’re more like you say that Remy told her, like being watched in the shower. That’s a good analogy.”

“But when they actually reach in, it’s more like rape, that’s what you’re saying.” Logan said doggedly.

He wasn’t going to let this go; Spencer could see that. He could also feel just how upset it was making him. Spencer hurried to try and explain things a little more, to make Logan understand. He honestly believed that the others didn’t realize just how intimate their touch was. How could he blame them when he and Remy had never fully explained it? “It’s not their fault, really, Logan. Sometimes I think others see it more like a link, like what Jean and Scott share. But it…it’s so much more than that. So different. We don’t share thoughts the way that they do, though there are times that it seems like we do in some subconscious form or another. Times where I’ll be thinking of something and then Remy says something that perfectly matches what I’m thinking. Or times that he’s looking around for something and I’ll hand it to him without realizing that I’m doing it.”

He paused for a minute and tried to think of how to put this into words. Logan said nothing, just stood beside his bed and waited patiently. That was one trait that Spencer really enjoyed about the man. Logan never pressured him into finding his words. He would simply wait until Spencer found the ones he needed.

“Our bond isn’t separate from us.” Spencer began slowly. “It’s not like it’s this little addition in our heads that we can look in or look away from. I’ve heard Jean say that she or Scott can block the other out of their link for a while if they need to. Remy and I can’t do that. We’re always there with one another. Always. At first, it was like having this whole other person in my head with me, all the time. But the more time that passes, the more we seem to be…not merging. More, meshing. Like a finely woven net.” That was the best metaphor that he could come up with. It was strangely poetic, an odd thought process for him, yet it was perfect. “Like the strands of who we are have been sewn together to make up one fine net instead of two separate ones.”

“You guys can’t separate _at all_?” Logan looked stunned by that.

“No.” Spencer shook his head. “The closer we are, the more we get, and we get the best while we’re touching. But he’s always here with me. Like, right now, I can tell you that he’s not happy at all. Whatever’s going on, he’s fighting to control his temper. He’s been pretty steady for a while now but someone or something is making him mad. And he’s worried, too. He hasn’t stopped being worried since I left him. He’s still feeding me little bits of strength, too, though he can’t do that as well when we’re apart like this. The protector part of him, the part I’ve heard you tell Scott you see as this new feral part of Remy, is still clamoring in him to try and make him come up here.” Pausing, he quirked his head, his gaze turning inward for a moment while he read Remy’s emotions. It gave his voice a slightly distant quality. “He feels threatened right now. Not a threat to him, but to me. He doesn’t react this strongly to a threat to himself. Whatever it is that’s making him feel that way, it’s not getting better. It’s steadily getting worse, actually.”

Abruptly Spencer's gaze snapped up to Logan’s face. “I don’t know what’s happening or what set him off down there, but he’s slipping more and more into that instinctual side that this bond seems to have created in him. I don’t know what he’ll do, Logan, and I hate it, but I don’t have the energy to go down there. Please, would you go and make sure he’s okay? I won’t be able to rest until I know that he’s going to be fine. If you’re with him, I’ll know that there’s someone there who can deal with him if he snaps and who will help keep him safe. Please?”

The seriousness of his request was easily felt. Because of that, Logan didn’t waste time. He gave Spencer a nod and turned immediately to leave and head out. Spencer relaxed back into the bed as he watched Logan leave the room. Logan would go and watch out for Remy for him. If he had to trust his partner to someone else, it would be Logan. Spencer didn’t even stop to think about how protective his own thoughts were at the moment. He was too busy focusing on the feelings in their bond and wishing that he had enough energy to get out of bed and go down there. He could calm Remy, he knew. A touch, a soft word, and he could calm him. But right now Spencer doubted his body would let him cross the room, let alone go downstairs. Even just talking with Logan the way he had been had taken a little more of his energy.

Slipping down a little lower in the bed, Spencer curled up on his side and snuggled under the blankets. Absently he thought to himself that Remy was going to be annoyed later when he came up and found the door unlatched. Then he dismissed that thought. Nothing he could do about it. He closed his eyes and fed a little comfort and support down the bond to Remy. In response, he felt the man relax slightly, just a bit of the edge fading. With that, Spencer relaxed a little too, and he lost the battle with himself. His body drifted off to sleep.

CXCX

Agitated was a good word to describe how Remy was feeling. None of this was going well. Not that he had ever thought it would go well. Still, he’d hoped to have a little more time before he would have to deal with this. He’d thought he still had time to try and figure out just how the hell he was going to tell Rogue that her boyfriend was now permanently bonded to another person, and that basically she was going to be getting a two for one deal in this relationship. How on earth do you explain that to someone? ‘Sorry, honey, but I’m bonded to another person now, one who is as much a part of me as I am of him, and so basically, he’s a part of our relationship now. Oh, and by the way, there are times that he’s going to be upset or he’s going to need me, and what you want or need is going to take second place to that. We have to touch a lot, too, and sometimes we sleep in the same bed all wrapped around each other. Hope you don’t mind.’ Yeah, right. If he tried saying any of that, Rogue would send him flying into the nearest wall, and that was if he was lucky.

Remy hadn’t said anything at first. He was too busy focusing on Spencer. Though the man had walked out of the hanger under his own steam, there was no way for him to hide from Remy just how bone weary he was. He really did need to be in a bed. He was exhausted, still hadn’t fully recharged, and the emotional climate of the room just how hadn’t helped him at all. If anything, it had undone some of the work they’d done on the flight here. Spencer still wasn’t shielding right and he was feeling people’s emotions a little too much. Keeping them back was taking what little energy he had. At least Logan was with him, though. The man wouldn’t let anything happen to Spencer. Sometimes, Remy thought to himself that Logan seemed to be adopting the scrawny genius. He was awfully protective of him.

No sooner had the door closed behind Spencer than Rogue was taking a step towards Remy. She put her fists on her hips and glared hotly at him. “Just what the hell is going on here, swamp rat? Who is this Spencer and what the hell’s going on? Everyone’s been acting like they got some big secret here or something ever since I got back.”

The only thing that kept Remy from snapping back at her was that he knew his temper wouldn’t get him anywhere with her and it would only worry Spencer. He fought back his temper and tried to make his voice calm and steady. “Why don’t we take a walk, chere? Dere’s a lot dat Remy needs to tell y’ and it may take a bit.”

“I aint going nowhere with you till you tell me what’s going on!” Rogue snapped.

Remy drew in a breath and held it for a moment while counting to ten. Behind him, he could hear Ororo and Kurt running through the necessary post-flight operations behind him in the ‘Bird, and Scott stood over by the wall talking with Jean while still keeping turned enough to be able to watch Remy and Rogue. The two were known for their fights. Remy had often heard others in the house whisper when the two of them fought, telling each other that “The Southern states are at war again”. People generally tried to be anywhere else when their fights happened. “Preferably another state” Bobby had told him once. Remy was a shouter when furious and Rogue was known to get a little physical if pushed too hard, which, naturally, Remy couldn’t help but do.

There was going to be no convincing the stubborn girl to move this to somewhere more private. If she wanted to do this here, then so be it. He’d tried to be considerate. “Fine. Don’t say dat Remy didn’t warn y’. At least come sit down. Dis is gonna take a bit.” With one hand, Remy gestured to the ramp. After a second’s hesitation, she moved over and sat down. Remy took a seat as well and he kept a small distance between them. No need to tempt fate by getting close together. If—when—she reacted badly, he didn’t really fancy the idea of being in striking distance. And something in him was telling him to keep back, out of reach.

He waited until they were both settled in before he started his story. “It started out when Wolvie and I was sitting watch on a mutant…”

The whole tale took a good ten minutes for him to tell. Rogue said nothing, not interrupting him once. She let him get the whole story out from start to finish. Or, not really the _whole_ story, but at least enough of it for her to understand the basics. Remy found himself keeping little things back from her. Some of it didn’t seem quite right to tell her. He sure as hell wasn’t going to tell her that they’d shared a bed a few times. She would take that the wrong way and nothing would convince her otherwise. He did, however, make a point to tell her how much they had to touch. That was something that he couldn’t hide from her.

She may not have said anything through his story, but her face and body spoke volumes. She grew more and more tense the more that he spoke and her expression hardened and darkened until her face was a mask of fury. Her restraint lasted until only seconds after Remy finished his story. Then the temper she was known for came spewing from her. “So you’re, you’re _bonded_ with some strange freak, and you, what, never once thought to call and _tell me_?”

“Watch y’r mouth. “Remy snapped automatically. “Watch how y’ talk about him. Y’ don’t know him and y’ aint got any call fo’ insulting de _homme_.”

Rogue snorted inelegantly at that. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to be offensive towards your precious _friend_.”

The sneer she put on that last word left no doubt just what she meant by ‘friend’. Just like he’d known she would, she was already making assumptions about the relationship between them. “Y’ see, dis right here, dat’s why Remy didn’t want to tell y’. Y’ aint even listening! All y’r hearin’ is dat dere’s someone dat Remy’s gotta touch and y’ take it and turn it all dirty and nasty when it aint anyt’ing like dat. It aint sexual and it aint dirty, our touching. It aint like dat!” A part deep down inside of Remy growled at those words. He didn’t let himself thinking about why. He just pushed it down and ignored it, focusing instead on the furious woman that was now rising beside him. He rose as well to keep them on even footing with each other.

“Oh yeah? Then what’s it like, sugar? Huh?” She sneered.

His eyes sparked slightly as he glared at her. “It’s like…it’s like air. We need it as much as we need to breathe.”

“So you’re saying I gotta put up with that, that nineteen seventies charity shop reject hanging around all the time, pawing all over _my_ boyfriend?”

Remy’s temper grew even more. His plan to keep calm and controlled went right out the window. “Remy told y’, watch y’r mouth. Insult him again…

“And what?” She interrupted. She stalked forward, fury bright on her face. “What’re you gonna do, swamp rat?”

That protector part of Remy pushed towards the surface. Something primal within him was screaming _Danger! Danger!_ Every inch of him braced for trouble and the protector in him was snarling, demanding that he protect his partner, protect the Healer, keep him safe at all costs. Rogue had her hand out towards him and Remy took a step back as the growl building in him finally broke free. She was going to touch him and he couldn’t let that happen. Just the thought had the Protector growing stronger and his growl deepening. Rogue’s touch was dangerous on the average person, but it wasn’t something that Remy had ever really worried about that much before. If anything, he’d tried to get her to touch him, and he’d tried to teach her ways of touching safely. But that was before all this. Before this bond had come to life. What would happen to him and Spencer if she touched him? What would it do to Spencer? To him? What would it do to their bond? Would it…could it take it away from them?

A calming sensation traveled over the bond to him. Remy actually felt the difference as Spencer turned his attention inwards towards their connection. He knew that Spencer was monitoring him now and intentionally sending the soothing emotions to try and help him calm. Remy tried to let it in and let himself relax a little. His head cleared enough that he could look at Rogue and not feel the urge to snarl like some animal at her. He had enough presence of mind to warn her. “Back off, Rogue.”

Of course she couldn’t listen to him. “The hell with that.”

“ _Back off_!” He repeated, and this time his voice was edged with that snarl he was fighting to hold in. Off to the sides he saw as Scott started quickly making his way towards them. The man recognized the trouble brewing here. Kurt was standing at the top of the ramp, watching them with wide eyes, and Ororo was also starting to make her way towards him.

“Rogue!” Scott called out, drawing her attention over to him. He moved quickly forward, jogging towards them. “Listen to him. Back off!”

“Come, Rogue.” Ever calm, even in the face of trouble, Ororo smoothly stepped up to Rogue’s side and put a calming hand on the girl’s shoulder. “Just give him a bit of space. This bond had done strange things to them. You would do well to heed his warnings.”

Rogue looked livid at the interference. There was no telling what she would’ve done or said next. Luckily, none of them had to find out. The hanger door burst open and the sound of the door connecting with the wall was enough to draw most everyone’s attention. Rogue, Ororo, Kurt and Scott all looked up as Logan came jogging into the room. Only Remy stayed frozen. His eyes were still locked on Rogue and on the hand that had been lifted towards him. Seeing it drop back down had him relaxing just slightly. Having Logan move directly to his side helped him even more. Logan surprised them all by not simply stopping at Remy’s side, but stepping right in front of him. He put one hand in the center of Remy’s chest and pushed him back a full step. “Back up, bub. Now.”

Now it was Logan who was the recipient of Remy’s furious glare. When Remy snarled at him, Logan snarled right back, not in the least bit intimidated. “Snarl and growl all you want, Gumbo. Just back off, now, and calm your ass down. I don’t know what she did and I don’t give a damn. Your partner’s drained as hell up there and being forced to feel your foul ass mood aint helping none. Get your shit under control, now!”

There was nothing that was better designed to force Remy to control himself than the idea that he was hurting Spencer. While he knew his emotions didn’t actually hurt Spencer, so to speak, they would worry him and cause him to focus on trying to help Remy instead of resting the way that he should be. Remy didn’t fight it as Logan pushed him back another few steps. Indeed, he let him, adding in another step back of his own. He drew in a deep breath and tried to force down the anger that was still burning in him. Distance between him and Rogue seemed to help. It helped even more when he looked up and saw that she looked shocked now, not angry. It was her anger that had left him feeling threatened. Her anger and the potential of her powers.

 _Dieu_ , Remy thought achingly. How the hell was he going to deal with this? This was the last damn thing he wanted. He didn’t want to have to be stuck between his partner and his girlfriend. What was he going to do? He couldn’t force Rogue to deal with his temper every time he felt like Spencer or their bond was threatened. But he couldn’t be around her and have her act that way. Snide comments were one thing. As much as they irritated him, he’d be able to deal with those. But if she did something to make him feel threatened, he knew the Protector in him—and it was such a part of him, a whole other aspect to his personality, that he actually thought of it in a capital letter like that, as if Protector were another person living inside of him—would respond to that threat. Protector was all primal instincts. Thank God Logan had come down here to step in and help. Remy looked up at his friend and put his gratitude into his look. “ _Merci_ , Logan.”

“No problem. Kid told me you were having trouble down here. You both relaxing now?”

The fact that Logan asked about both of them made Remy smile. Logan was the only person here in the house who did things like that. “ _Oui_. Remy’s fine now an Spencer feels like he’s finally sleepin’. His body was just too tired.”

“Remy.” Scott’s voice broke into their quiet conversation and brought their attention back to the room. Remy looked around Logan to where Scott still stood at the ramp to the Blackbird. He was in front of Rogue, who was still standing with Ororo and was watching Remy with a gaze that was part worried, part hurt, and still part anger. Remy winced a little at that. He’d have to deal with that here in a minute. For the moment, “ _Oui,_ Scotty?”

“The Professor wants you down in his study. He says your shields are too high right now for him to ask you himself. He said it’s important.”

Remy bit his bottom lip and looked back to Rogue once more. She met his stare for just a second before spinning on her heel and marching away. Remy resisted the urge to sigh. Great. This was just great. Today was just turning out to be a bundle of laughs, wasn’t it? Why not add a visit to the Professor to it all? Drawing in a steady breath, he nodded to Scott and turned to make his way across the hanger. Best to get this done with. The sooner this was done, the sooner he could go to Spencer's room and check on his partner and then catch some sleep himself. He was ready for today to be over with. The rest of the problems could wait until tomorrow.


	15. Chapter 15

It was no real surprise when Logan followed Remy down to the Professor’s study. However, it was a surprise for Remy when he found not just Charles there, but Jean standing behind him. Great. Just great. She was one of the last people he wanted to see right now. It didn’t take a genius to see that she was still upset with him. He could both see and feel it. Really, he didn’t need this shit right now, especially not from her. She wasn’t the only one that was still annoyed. Hell, she didn’t even have any right to be the annoyed one here! Remy bit back the snarl that sat beneath the surface. The Protector was still too close to the surface, reacting to any threat, real or perceived. He fought to clamp down on it and keep his voice as calm as he possibly could as he addressed the Professor. “What is it y’ need, _monsieur_?”

Charles gestured towards the chairs with one hand. “Come in and sit down, Remy.”

Sit down? Not likely. Remy didn’t want to stay here a moment longer than he had to. He just wanted to get this done so he could get to Spencer. If Scott hadn’t said that this was important than Remy would’ve ignored the summons and just gone straight upstairs. His impatience showed a little in his voice when he declined the seat. “ _Non, monsieur._ Whatever dis is, can we just get it done? Remy don’t want to leave Spencer alone fo’ long.”

“Very well.” Folding his hands in his lap, Charles sat back in his chair, getting comfortable. Piercing eyes fixed on Remy’s face. “If he were up for this, I would have him in here too. But I understand that he needs rest. Jean showed me events from her perspective.” One of his hands gestured behind him to Jean, then settled back down in his lap. “How is he doing now?”

“Exhausted.” Remy said bluntly. If Charles thought he was going to get any of the usual charm or cordiality that Remy showed him in their visits, he had another thing coming. “Is dat what y’ wanted to talk about? What happened wit’ Spencer? He’s an empath dat overloaded on emotions and had to shut down to fix himself. Remy shielded him until he could get control again. End of story. Can Remy go now?”

Logan gave a low growl beside him. “Watch the attitude, Gumbo. Aint no one in here causing trouble.”

Not causing trouble? Remy had to laugh at that. His laughter had a dry, mocking sound to it. “Yeah, right, Wolvie. Aint no one causing trouble. _Sure_.” He drew that last word out in one long drawl, eyes darting up towards Jean and then dropping back down to Charles.

“You seem the one intent on causing trouble, Remy.” Jean pointed out. “We just wanted to discuss what happened today in a calm setting.”

The question floored Remy. _He_ was causing trouble? _Him_? He gaped at her, unable to believe that she had the nerve to say that to him. Even Logan was staring at her with disbelief. The shock faded for Remy and temper took its place. “Y’ gotta be kiddin’ me. Y’ got a hell of a lot of room to talk, _femme_!”

Before things could progress to an all-out fight, Charles held his hands up. “Enough. I will not have fighting in here.”

Jean quieted down immediately. Remy, however, sneered at them both. “Den control y’r girl, _monsieur_. Remy’s taken enough shit from strong willed _femmes_ t’day. He’s had enough shit from everywhere.” Enough was absolutely enough. If all they wanted to do was discuss what had happened today then he was done with this. He was done with all of it. Temper boiled up in him so that the red in his eyes glowed and there was a small crackle of energy around his hands, which had instinctively clenched at his cards. “Y’all can sit and dissect dis shit from left to right and upside down fo’ all Remy cares. Study it, analyze it, Remy don’t give a damn. _Mais_ in all y’r talkin’ an studying, y’ might try stopping fo’ a minute to remember dat dere are two living, breat’ing people dat all dis is happening to. People dat have feelings. Right now one of ‘ems upstairs asleep, an even in sleep de grief aint leavin’ him alone.”

“Remy,”

“ _Non, monsieur_. Jus’, _non_.” Remy cut him off. He drew in a breath and forced his tone just a little calmer. The Professor didn’t deserve the brunt of Remy’s anger right now; he wasn’t the one to have triggered it. At least, not fully. But he was just so tired of this crap right now. So very damn tired. “Y’all mean de best, we know dat. _Mais_ t’ink about it—if dis were anyone else and dey’d gone t’rough solvin’ a case with missing kids, quitting deir job and basically sayin’ goodbye to deir whole life, an den dey’d gone and overloaded deir powers, would y’ still be tryin’ to ask questions? Would y’ be taking away de only partner dey got in dis place?” He didn’t pause to give them time to answer. “Of course y’ wouldn’t. De last time Jeannie dere had troubles with her powers, hearin’ too many t’oughts, y’ told her to go lie down an sent Scotty to stay wit’ her all day. Y’ wouldn’t let no one disturb dem. Dis shouldn’t be any different. Now, if y’all don’t mind, Remy’s going on upstairs and he’s gonna take care of Spencer an make sure dat he knows dat he might’ve lost a hell of a lot t’day, _mais_ he aint alone. _Excusez-moi_.”

Without wasting another moment, Remy turned with a flair of his coat and marched out of the room. Behind him, he heard Logan give a low, approving chuckle.

Luck finally seemed to have found Remy. He made it upstairs without running into anyone at all. When he reached Spencer's door, he gave the knob a testing turn, scowling just slightly when he found that it wasn’t bolted as Spencer had said it would be. He let go of that annoyance as he stepped inside. His eyes went across the room and immediately sought out his bondmate. Spencer was curled up in his usual ball in the middle of the bed with the blankets twisted around him. One foot was sticking out, showing that he hadn’t even bothered to pull off his shoes. The Cajun blew out a breath and rolled his eyes. With a shake of his head he turned around, shutting and locking the door. He had no troubles navigating in the mostly dark room. He closed the distance between him and the bed and stopped near the foot of it. He shed his jacket first, hanging it off the corner of the footboard. Next to come off were his shoes, followed by his jeans. Jeans were hung up as well and shoes were tucked under the bed.

Once he had those off, he set about taking care of Spencer. Only one foot was sticking out from the blankets so Remy went to that one first, carefully unlacing the shoe and pulling it off. It was when he tugged at the other foot that Spencer stirred a bit. Remy caught sight of one sleepy eye peeking out through a screen of messy hair. “’emy?”

The mumbled version of his name had Remy’s lips quirking. He didn’t even realize that most of his temper had been left behind at the door. His gaze was fond when he glanced up at Spencer's face briefly. “ _Oui,_ cher, it’s just Remy. Y’ fo’got to take y’r extras off b’fore y’ got into bed.”

“Mm.” Spencer obligingly pushed his foot out a little more so that Remy had easier access to it. He turned his head enough that both eyes peeked out through his hair now. One hand came up and swatted at that hair, too sleepy to really make much more than a token effort before he dropped it back down. “S’kay. Just leave it.”

Remy pulled the shoe off and twisted to tuck it under the bed with the other. “Almost done, Penny. Y’ roll on over and Remy can get y’r belt. Dat can’t be comfortable.”

“Too tired to get naked.” Spencer mumbled at him.

That turned Remy’s smile into a laugh. He moved the blankets enough that he could catch hold of Spencer and roll him just enough to reach in to his belt. “Remy aint trying to get y’ naked, cher. He likes his partners a little more coherent fo’ dat.”

“Oh.”

Was he hearing things, or did Spencer sound almost…disappointed? No, he had to be hearing that wrong. Spencer was just messing with him. He was too tired to really realize what it was he was saying. Tomorrow, he’d be embarrassed as hell if he remembered this. Remy told himself that over and over as he unhooked the belt on Spencer's pants and then the button. As he started to slide them down Spencer's hips, not at all helped by the man’s sleepy attempts at assistance, he tried to make his tone joking once more and ignore the little flutter that had leapt through his stomach. “Tell y’ what, cher. We get dese off y’ and Remy promises y’ a cuddle instead. Been told Remy gives great cuddle.”

The smile that curved Spencer's lips had Remy smiling in return. “Perfect.” Spencer scooted back a little once Remy finished pulling his pants away. The Cajun slipped down into the bed, pulling the blankets up over them, and Spencer wasted no time in rolling right over to him and laying his head down on Remy’s chest. The unselfconscious and trusting way that the sleepy man just latched right on to him had Remy’s throat closing up for just a moment. A fuzzy contentment and peace replaced the earlier feelings of hurt and grief that had been in their bond. Remy looked down at the tousled head below and a wave of tenderness crashed over him. Had anyone ever trusted him so totally? He wrapped his arms around Spencer and hugged him in close. “Remy’s got y’, cher.” He murmured softly, not even sure Spencer could hear him. “He’s got y’. Y’r safe now.”

Spencer nuzzled at his chest a little, surprising him. His words surprised Remy even more. “Always feel safe with you.”

Remy drifted off to sleep with the warmth of those words burning inside of him.

CXCX

Breakfast was in full swing by the time the bonded pair joined them. Rogue was just sitting down at the table with her plate of eggs and toast and a cup of milk when the door opened and the two came in. She couldn’t help the instant hit of jealousy that ran through her at the sight of them. Remy had the scrawny little nerd tucked up against his side underneath one arm, the same as he’d walked with _her_ countless times, and they were laughing about something. Rogue watched furiously as the freak tipped his face up towards Remy and murmured something that set the swamp rat laughing even more. Well, dammit, there went her appetite.

She looked around the rest of the table while those two went over to the sidebar where the food was at. To her surprise, no one else seemed the least bit bothered by the pair. How on earth could they not be bothered by it? She watched Remy dump a heaping spoonful of eggs on Spencer's plate, totally ignoring the laughing protests it got him, and then that little shit actually dropped his head down on Remy’s shoulder for a second before straightening up and using his hip to bump the Cajun into moving. God!

Yesterday after Remy had left the hanger, Scott and Ororo had given Rogue a hell of a talking to, trying to tell her that Remy was right when he said the touches between them weren’t sexual. Who did they think they were kidding? There was no way they needed to touch _that much_. She wasn’t stupid and she wasn’t blind; any fool who looked at them could see the way that this Spencer looked at Remy. He looked at him like the sun rise and set on Remy. No one was going to convince her that the little shit didn’t want her boyfriend. It was way too obvious.

She wasn’t going to freak out, though. Shouting yesterday hadn’t gotten her anywhere. All it had gotten her was one pissed off Remy. Having Remy shout at her wasn’t anything new. They shouted all the time. It was just a part of their relationship. But he’d really looked like he was going to, to _attack_ her there at the end. Remy, attack her! All over that, that _thing_ over there!

No, no, she couldn’t get worked up. One part of her conversation with Scott and Ororo had really stuck with her. Scott had bluntly told her “Rogue, if you don’t at least _try_ to work with them on this, you’re going to lose him.” And Ororo had agreed with him. “He’s right, child.” She’d said. “If you’re thinking you can make Remy make a choice, you’re going to end up getting hurt, because he’s not going to choose you. He _can’t_.”

Well, they’d just see about that. Rogue knew that Scott was right; she would lose Remy if she kept doing things like she had yesterday. But she didn’t believe for a minute that Remy was going to choose Spencer over her. Ororo had to be wrong about that. She had to be. There was no way that freak could win out over her. Remy loved her. He was _hers_. But she could bite her tongue and bide her time. She could keep her temper somewhat controlled. From what she’d heard from others in the house—and she’d quizzed everyone she came across—Remy basically was feral now, at least in defense of Spencer. That meant that it wasn’t technically Remy who had a problem with her anger towards Spencer. It was the feral part of him created in this bond. That was the part that had growled and snarled at her yesterday; not her Remy. She just had to cater to that feral side for a little while and she would be able to deal with Remy. In the end, she’d make him see the truth.

No better time to start than now. The two were making their way over to the table now and Rogue saw when Remy took notice of the empty seats directly across from her. She forced back her temper and made herself smile invitingly at him. That smile faltered a little when she saw Remy hesitate. Spencer's eyes flickered over to her and then back to Remy and Rogue seethed inside when she saw Spencer lean in even closer to Remy and murmur something to him. Remy listened for a moment and then nodded at him. Then the two made their way over to the empty chairs across from her.

Remy’s expression was cautious when he sat down. She was used to that after one of their fights and wasn’t bothered by it. He was always a little cautious at first, waiting to see if she was done being mad at him or not. She kind of liked that. It usually made him a little extra attentive, too.

Not today. Today, he didn’t even say hello. Again it was Spencer who stepped in. He gave Remy a look of fond exasperation and then turned those big brown eyes over to her. “Good morning, Rogue.”

Ugh. She wanted to tell him what exactly he could do with his ‘good morning’, but she held it in. Stick to the plan, she reminded herself. Behave. “Morning.” There. Not friendly, but not rude enough to piss off that weird part of Remy.

A nudge from Spencer had Remy letting out a deep sigh. With his usual tact, the Cajun looked over at Spencer and said “Y’r just bound and determined to push dis, aint y’?”

Spencer grinned at him. “Absolutely.”

“Brat.”

“I’m not the one acting like a brat here.” Spencer said calmly. Then he turned his attention off of Remy and down to his plate of food. Remy mock glared at him, his lips twitching.

Rogue watched it all with her anger simmering down low in her belly. Bad enough that they had this, this _thing_ between them. Did they have to flaunt it in front of her?

She schooled her expression to one of calm when Remy looked up at her. His face wasn’t anywhere near as warm as it usually was and his voice was hesitant when he said “ _Bonjour,_ Roguie. Y’r lookin’ fine dis morning.”

That wasn’t even close to his usual flirtatious remarks. She’d dressed deliberately today, putting on her good gloves and the blue shirt that always had Remy eyeing her cleavage. He didn’t even look, now. Dammit. Damn that little shit for coming between them like this! Well, she wasn’t going to just back down. She wasn’t going to give Remy up that easily. “Mornin, Rem.” Putting on her best smile, she leaned forward a little under the pretense of grabbing the salt, making sure to give him quite an eyeful as she did. “You see the schedule yet? Cyke’s got most the house on a group training session this morning after breakfast. Bobby said it’s gonna be a bad one. He heard Scott and Jean fighting last night.”

There. Stick to things that were safe grounds to talk about and draw Remy into conversation. It worked perfectly. Remy’s hesitance melted just a little and he gave a low groan while he picked up his coffee mug. “ _Merde._ De _homme_ always takes it out on us when he’s fighting wit’ Jeannie. An he said de other day dat he was putting Remy back in regular training again.”

“I think he just enjoys torturing us. The man’s a sadist.”

“I haven’t found him to be so.” Spencer piped up. He was stirring sugar into his coffee and didn’t even look up at them as he spoke. “The term sadist is highly overused in society today. People use it to describe any person that they perceive as ‘bad’ or ‘evil’. In reality, sadism is a behavioral disorder characterized by callous, vicious, manipulative, and degrading behavior that is expressed towards other people. It’s not always physical, though. While some sadistic individuals do gain pleasure in inflicting physical pain on others, that doesn’t mean that sadism always involves the use of physical aggression or violence. More often, sadists express aggressive social behaviors and enjoy publicly humiliating others in order to gain a sense of power over them.” Spencer finally broke off his ramble and looked up to find most of the table was staring at him. Almost instantly his cheeks started to redden. He looked down at his plate and then up at Rogue again, obviously embarrassed. “And you weren’t being literal in that, were you?”

“No.” Rogue said flatly. She just sat there and stared at him. What the hell had that been?

To her surprise, there were a few smiles and a bit of laughter around the table. Betsy was grinning down at Spencer, Kurt was smiling down into his coffee, Logan let out a deep laugh, Bobby was smiling, and Ororo was even smirking just a bit. Only Warren kept his expression blank. And Remy, he was the worst of them all. He was grinning at Spencer like the kid had done something fantastic instead of rambled out facts about sadism like he was some sort of freaky dictionary. There was such…such _fondness_ in Remy’s face. Rogue’s blood boiled when Remy reached out and smoothed some of Spencer's hair back, tucking it behind his ear. “Aint no big deal, _mon ami_. We’re all getting used to y’r rambles. We don’t never know what we’re gonna learn from y’.”

“Breakfast and random facts.” Bobby called out with a laugh. “The perfect way to start your day!”

“Hey, I like it.” Betsy defended him. She had a fond look, too, when she looked over at Spencer, whose blush was growing even stronger. “Don’t mind these fools, Spencer. They’re just afraid you might actually teach them something.”

Seriously? Rogue couldn’t believe it. It was like the whole room was trying to reassure him that the freaky-ramble-thing he’d just done wasn’t freaky at all. From the sounds of it, the guy talked like this all the time! How the hell did Remy stand putting up with something like that? It had to drive him crazy. There was no way he actually _enjoyed_ listening to it. Most likely he was just being polite because he was stuck with the guy. That had to be it. He was just trying to keep the peace. The Remy she knew would be bored spitless with constant conversation like that.

Through the rest of breakfast, Rogue tried to keep up conversation, trying to draw Remy over to talk to her. Despite her best efforts, he kept pulling Spencer into the conversation as well, and she steadily grew more annoyed. It became harder and harder to keep her temper in check. Spencer seemed to realize it, too. He kept casting her glances up through his bangs and his conversation got less and less. In response, Remy seemed to lean in towards him more.

Spencer had no sooner finished his last bite than he was excusing himself from the table. When Remy started to move with him, Spencer put a hand on his arm to stop him. “No, don’t get up on my account. Go ahead and finish your breakfast and visiting. You’ve got training afterwards, anyways. I’m just going to go on down and talk to Hank for a little while.”

“Henri? Y’ still not feeling well, cher?” Now Remy turned fully towards Spencer and Rogue watched, gaping, as Remy caught Spencer's face and started to check his eyes and even feel at his forehead.

Rolling his eyes, Spencer swatted Remy’s hands away, just a hint of red touching his cheeks again. “I told you, Remy, I’m feeling much better. I just want to talk to Hank, that’s all. While you’re training, I figured I should be doing my own training.”

“What do y’ mean?”

“Well, healing is all well and good, but I think it would be much more effective to be able to know what I’m doing.” Spencer explained. “What if I’m trying to heal someone that has, say, shrapnel inside? I’ll need to remove that before I can heal them. Or, what if my energy is low? Knowing what to do, medically, could help quite a bit. Then I could save the healing for the more serious problems and conserve energy to make it last longer. It just seems to make the most sense to study medicine as much as I can. I was hoping that maybe he wouldn’t mind showing me things until I can take formal classes.”

“A sort of apprenticeship.” Logan chimed in.

Spencer nodded over at him. “Exactly.”

“Dat sounds like a good plan.” Remy told him.

The smile that Spencer worse just lit up his whole face. Rogue rolled her eyes and turned her attention away from them. This was just too much. This Spencer character had Remy wrapped around his finger! She was going to have her work cut out for her if she wanted to get Remy away from him and back to where he was supposed to be—with her. Sneaking a glance over at them as Spencer started to make his way out of the room, with Remy watching him every step of the way, she snorted quietly to herself. _Enjoy it while you can, freak. He’ll be mine again. You’re not taking him from me. No one’s taking him from me._


	16. Chapter 16

The house was pretty quiet for the moment. Logan listened carefully to the silence just to make sure there was no trouble somewhere that he hadn’t known about and then he gave a pleased nod when he realized that all was well. Most of the residents were down in Scott’s training session right now – probably cursing the man to hell and back. Logan had been a little surprised to see that this name wasn’t on the list for this training session. He’d just given a philosophical shrug and headed back upstairs.

He was just heading out back for a smoke when he felt a familiar ‘knock’ at his mind. Once he gave the okay, Charles was there, his familiar voice in Logan’s mind. // _Logan, might I have a word with you in my study_?//

Logan gave a small sigh of regret even as he slipped his cigar back into his shirt pocket. _//On my way//_

It took him no time at all to reach the Professor’s office. The door was open when he got there and he went inside, finding Charles over in the sitting area, rather than behind his desk. The man looked up at his entrance and smiled in greeting. “Thank you, Logan. If you’d shut the door, please? I’d rather our conversation stay private.”

Well didn’t that sound great? A little worried, he nonetheless did as asked and shut the door. Then he prowled over to the other side of the room and, instead of taking a spot on the couch, he perched himself on the window sill, all the while watching Charles carefully. He had a feeling he knew what the man wanted to talk about. The same thing that most people around here talked about anymore. “I’m guessing this is about our troublesome duo?”

Charles sighed heavily and his expression changed a little, showing quite a bit of concern underneath. “I find myself in need of advice, Logan. I have obviously acted in error with these two and I wish to rectify things. However, to do that, I need to understand exactly what happened and you are the one with the most information that I need. Would you care to share with me the memory of what happened to them? I failed to recognize Jean's attitude towards the bonded pair and I need to see to understand what exactly is going on."

They both knew how little Logan liked any path inside of his head. He looked Charles right in the eye and didn’t even bother hiding how he used his senses to scent the air around him to check for any signs of deception. Nothing in the man’s scent changed; no rapid heartbeat, no hint of sweat, all of which would’ve been signs of lies. Logan settled back against the window and gave a low growl. “Only about this, Chuck. Nothin else! And I don’t want you sharing none of it with no one else, either.”

“You have my word, Logan.” Charles assured him. He paused briefly to prepare himself to see what it was the Wolverine was going to share with him. “Are you ready?”

Logan gave him a nod and then closed his eyes and started concentrating. He felt Charles in his mind and he concentrated on his memories for the man, showing him what he’d seen, starting at the moment the boys got back from visiting with Spencer's Mom. He felt Charles shock and heard him gasp when he saw Spencer for the first time. It was echoed by the memory of Logan’s shock. The kid had looked like ten miles of bad road. Together, they watched Remy coming around the car and protectively getting Spencer out, moving him to the back seat, and how he refused to drop his guard until Logan had taken up guard outside the car door. He showed the pain on both men’s faces; the tightness to Remy’s body that was at odds with the so-gentle way he held Spencer close to him. Then the memories jumped to the Blackbird, of Spencer lying there with his head cradled in Remy’s lap, covered with his coat. Logan’s thoughts from that time played with the memory— _He’s got the kid sheltered in safe territory and he’s even wrapped his coat around him, marking him as his for all to see_ —and then there was Jean going towards them.

The memories kept going, showing Spencer's pained cry, Remy’s reaction and his angry words to Jean and the hurt and anger that was on Jean’s face.

When Logan opened his eyes again, Charles was staring at him in shock. “Good Lord. It’s no wonder Remy was still so protective of him after that. Do you have any idea what happened to create such a crash?”

Logan thought briefly about telling the man about the conversation he’d shared with Spencer upstairs but that didn’t feel right to him. That conversation had been private. “You’ll have to ask the kid. He’d had a pretty rough day. That case left him lookin’ tired and then he went to quit his job and had to say goodbye to his friends again. After that, they went to his mother. There were only gone an hour. Whatever happened there, it was just the cherry on the sundae.”

“And then they return home and find out that Rogue has returned while they were gone.” He closed his eyes and shook his head ever so slightly. His scent changed slightly, sorrow tinting it now. “The fates are not giving them an easy time of things lately, are they?”

“Sure don’t seem like it. Aint gonna be any easier with Rogue here, neither. Girl’s got something up her sleeve.” Any fool could see that. She had some sort of plan. “You better keep an eye on her. She’s gonna cause trouble.”

“I will.”

Nodding, Logan pushed himself up off the windowsill and straightened up. He pulled his cigar out of his pocket and rolled it between his fingers. Charles had asked for his opinion at the start of this; well, now he was going to get it. “As for fixing this, you could start by treating em both with respect.” He saw his words startle the other man a little. He didn’t give Charles a chance to protest. “Rem was right; everyone just tries to study em. You guys don’t just try and talk to em. The pup’s a smart kid. He had three Ph.D.’s by twenty one and he’s got other degrees, too. He worked as an elite profiler for the country’s top profiling units. He’s a genius. An Rem’s a hell of a lot smarter than anyone ever gives him credit for.”

“Yes, he is.” More than once Remy had surprised Charles with something that he’d known.

“The both of them are used to moving and working all the time, Chuck, and we got em homebound here. Gumbo’s used to going on missions, doing jobs, or even just heading into town. Spencer's used to traveling all the time for work, using his skills and working that brain of his. But they’re stuck here at the house all the time now. I’ve seen the kid in the library here trying to do something just to distract his head for a while. We keep penning em in like this and you can bet they’re gonna end up bolting soon. No one wants to live in a cage, no matter how pretty it is.”

With that last bit of advice, Logan turned and left the room, leaving Charles to think on everything he’d just learned.

CXCX

A few hours after his conversation with Logan, Charles made his way upstairs. A quick sweep through the house had showed him where to find the two he wanted. Once he located them, he gathered the tray made to attach to his chair and he loaded it down with fresh coffee and biscuits. A peace offering, such as it were. Then he made his way upstairs to Spencer's room. It was time to try to start repairing the damage that he and others had done.

As he got close to the room, he heard the sounds of muffled voices coming from inside. Remy’s husky laugh could be easily heard. It was followed by the lighter tones of Spencer's laugh. Charles was surprised to realize that he hadn’t often heard that sound since Spencer had arrived with them. It was yet another thing to show him just how little he’d been paying attention. Well, he was paying attention now. When he reached the door he knocked and waited patiently for an answer. The laughter cut off and footsteps sounded as someone came over to the door. A moment later it opened and a pair of red and black eyes fixed on him. Surprise registered there first, followed quickly by a hint of suspicion. Yet Remy’s voice was perfectly cordial. “Professor. What can Remy do fo’ y’?”

“May I come in?” With one hand he gestured to the tray on his lap. “I come bearing coffee.”

There was a moment of hesitation from Remy. Then Spencer's voice called out from further inside the room. “Let him in, Remy.”

That seemed to be all it took. The hesitation faded and Remy stepped back, pulling the door open wide so that Charles could come in without hindrance. He watched Charles carefully, though. The message in those sharp eyes was clear. He was letting him in with Spencer because Spencer wanted it; but he wouldn’t be afraid to get him to leave. Charles had expected nothing less. He’d known that his visit would set Remy on edge. He was coming into what that primal part of Remy probably considered ‘their territory’ and Charles knew that meant that he had to tread carefully.

Charles found Spencer sitting cross legged on the bed, surrounded by books. He leaned forward to move some of them and gestured for Charles to come close. Charles brought his chair right up beside the bed. “Thank you for allowing me a moment of your time.”

“Of course.” Spencer reassured him.

Remy let out a low snort. Though he was still on alert, it didn’t stop humor from lighting his face. He gave Charles a wink as he helped to take the tray from the man’s chair and set it on the bed. “Y’ said de magic word back dere. Spencer don’t never turn down free coffee.” He mock whispered.

Spencer shot Remy an exasperated look. “Remy!” Turning to look back at Charles, his cheeks slightly pink, Spencer hurried to reassure him. “Don’t listen to him, sir. Of course you’re welcome to visit, coffee or no.”

“Jus’ not first t’ing in de morning.” Remy countered. “If y’ aint got coffee den, y’ aint getting not’ing outta him.”

“You’re going to get something here in a minute if you don’t watch yourself.” Spencer threatened as he stretched himself over to set down another stack of books. A glance at the titles showed Charles that these were all medical books he had seen down in Hank’s labs.

Charles watched the playful bickering between the two men and he had to smile a little. Despite the situation, it appeared that these two were really starting to click together, and he didn’t think it was just the bond. They complimented one another nicely and they seemed to draw honest enjoyment from each other’s company. Remy was bold and outspoken, a passionate being who would laugh with you or fight with you, depending. Spencer was shyer, more polite, and Charles was beginning to realize just how much he kept locked inside. The only outward sign of yesterday’s trouble were slight tension lines around his eyes. Otherwise, he gave the perfect image of calm and control.

While the two bickered, Remy had set about preparing and serving the various coffee cups. Charles raised his eyebrows when he took the cup from the man and sipped on it, realizing that Remy had prepared it just the way he liked it. How on earth did he remember something like that?

Once all the cups were served, Remy moved some of the books to one side of the bed and settled down by Spencer, clearly putting them side by side to face whatever this was. “What can we do fo’ y’, _monsieur_? Remy don’t t’ink y’ came all de way up here jus’ to drink some coffee.”

His blunt remark earned him a light slap on the arm from Spencer and a scolding look that, much to Charles’ amusement, actually had Remy looking down contritely. Charles smothered his smile and cleared his throat to draw their attention back to him. “You are correct. I didn’t come up here just to drink some coffee. I also came up here to offer my most sincere apologies to the both of you.”

Now that caught their attention. Two pairs of eyes shot up and locked on Charles, each one showing surprise. They said nothing, though. Not denying it but not encouraging it either. They just watched him and waited.

“You both have every right to be angry and upset with me, as well as with others in the house.” Charles began. He met them stare for stare and tried to put what he felt right there on his face so they would see the honesty of his words. “I must apologize to you both for the lack of consideration I have shown you, not just in the past couple days, but since your arrival here, Spencer. This has been immensely difficult for the both of you and I know that we haven’t made it any easier by our study of you. As Remy so succinctly pointed out to me yesterday, we have forgotten that there are two very real people here. You are both more than just something to study.”

The look that Spencer shot Remy said that he hadn’t been aware of that conversation.

Charles drew in a breath and turned his eyes to Spencer. “I cannot imagine what it has been like for you to be pulled away from your life in DC. You are here with strangers, people that the government you worked for considers terrorists, and you are here with neither friend nor family to stand by your side. Your life, your career, has been taken from you and you are left here with people you don’t know and without any real sense of purpose. I am so terribly sorry that none of us recognized the enormity of the sacrifices you’ve been forced to make, Dr. Reid.”

“It’s fine, sir.” Spencer started. He held up a hand when Remy started to protest and he shook his head. “No, Remy. I knew what I would be giving up by coming here. I knew what I was walking away from. No one forced me here. I didn’t expect nor want any form of pity over it, sir. You’ve been doing exactly what I wanted you to. You’ve been helping us to study and understand what’s going on here.”

“We can still study the bond while respecting the people connected by it.” Charles said.

Spencer dipped his head as if conceding that point. “I won’t deny that a little respect would go a long way for us. Understanding, as well. I’m not arguing that point, sir. I was simply pointing out that my choices are my own and I hold no one else responsible for the results of those choices. I made my decisions knowing full well what would happen in the end.”

“Is there something we might do to maybe make this a little easier on you? On either one of you?” Charles made sure to look to Remy and include him in this. “Dr. Reid isn’t the only one to have made sacrifices here, Remy. I know you aren’t fond of being cooped up for long, yet you’ve done remarkably well with it so far. Is there anything that I can do to help make this easier on you two?”

Shrugging one shoulder negligently, Remy leaned back against the footboard and stretched his long legs out. It incidentally put his legs between Spencer and Charles. “Aint not’ing y’ can do. Remy can’t exactly go on missions right now like dis. An dere aint much call fo’ a profiler round dese parts.”

“Remy’s right. There isn’t exactly anything that you can do, sir.” Spencer rested his mug on one knee, his other hand dropping down to his side where he started to absently fiddle with the seam on the outside of Remy’s jeans. “All we can really do is continue on the way we are and hope that we start to figure this thing out. Until then, we’re doing all we can.”

The sad thing was, Spencer was right. There really was nothing they could do. In all his thinking Charles hadn’t quite managed to figure out something to give the men to do to keep them occupied. Neither one liked being idle yet there wasn’t exactly a lot around here for them to do. Missions were what kept them busy and there was no way he could send them out on a mission right now. Not with how little they understood. What if something happened and they were separated? There was no telling what would happen if they got too far apart and there was no way to bring them back together. But he couldn’t just let them continue on this way. Something Logan had said had really struck true with Charles. He looked at the two men and he knew it was right. If they didn’t figure out something for these two to do, they would bolt. Even with the best of intentions, a cage was a cage. You could dress it up any way you wanted, but it still remained a cage. How long would it take before they decided they’d had enough? How long before they decided to try and find help somewhere else?

Charles could see the discontent in Spencer. He could see the restlessness in Remy. These were not men to sit back and let others solve their problems for them. They weren’t men content to wait on the sidelines and watch all the action happen. Each, in their own way, was used to being involved, to doing things and being a part of things. Confinement was torture. He didn’t know where they’d go or what they’d do if they finally left. But in that moment, he knew that they _would_ leave if something didn’t change soon.

Resolve firming his spine, Charles looked at them both and made a promise, both to them and to himself. “We will find something, gentlemen.” _I will figure out a way to help you. I will. I’m not going to lose you both._

CXCX

Once serious conversation was out of the way, the trio sat for a while and simply enjoyed their coffee together, talking about normal, casual things. It was nice and peaceful. But by the time that Charles left, Remy was practically vibrating with pent up energy. It amused Spencer to see it. He watched as Remy fought to hold it in, failing miserably. Finally Spencer couldn’t take it anymore. Tipping his head to the side, he looked at his bondmate and smiled slightly. “Would you like to take a walk or something, Remy? Maybe get some fresh air?”

Remy just about leapt up at the opportunity. “ _Oui!_ ”

Soon enough the two men were making their way downstairs. Spencer couldn’t help but laugh lightly while he watched Remy half walk, half skip beside him. “Didn’t you burn enough energy in training earlier?”

“ _Non_. Remy’s always got energy to burn, cher.” He grinned roguishly at that, making Spencer chuckle, and then added on “Henri t’inks it’s somet’ing to do wit’ Remy’s mutation. Remy converts kinetic energy, see, so he’s always got it going in him. Henri says Remy’s built to be in motion.”

Hm. That was definitely something worth thinking about. Spencer logged that little fact away to think about later. For now, he tried to think of something to help Remy burn a bit of that energy before the other man started to bounce off the walls. That problem was solved the minute they stepped outside. Remy caught sight of Logan smoking at the edge of the grass and he bounced his way over to the man. “Wolvie!”

Logan looked up just as Remy ended his last bounce right in front of him. Scowling, he shook his head. “What the hell you on, Cajun?”

“Remy aint on nothing.” Stuffing his hands down into his pockets, Remy rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet. “He’s _bored_. Bored, bored, bored.”

“Shit.” Logan looked up, eyes darting around until they settled on Spencer, who was making his way over to them at a much slower pace than Remy’s exuberant bounce. “Aint it your job to entertain him now?” He demanded of Spencer.

Remy didn’t give Spencer a chance to answer. “ _Non,_ Wolvie. Remy’s bored, so dat means Spencer's bored too.” He whined. That was close enough to the truth. Their moods definitely did tend to mirror one another more often than not. Spencer was getting better at separating what he felt from what Remy felt, at least enough to be able to keep Remy’s feelings from overwhelming him, but they did still bleed over more often than not.

His words just made Logan’s scowl grow bigger. “What am I, your event coordinator? Go spar down in the Danger Room.”

“Already did dat earlier. Don’t no one wanna spar wit’ po’ Remy.” He paused and a hopeful light hit his eyes. “Y’ spar wit’ Remy, M. Logan?”

The switch from ‘Wolvie’ to ‘M. Logan’ showed just how badly Remy wanted this. Spencer watched the byplay between these two with amusement. Their friendship was an interesting one. They growled and grumbled at each other, bickered and fought, snapped and snarled, and there was no one in the house that Remy trusted more. Logan gave a long suffering sigh and rolled his eyes heavenward. Yet, he lifted one hand and gestured for them to follow. And he made sure his gesture included Spencer, too, not just Remy.

The trio set off down the lawn. Spencer followed curiously, not sure where they were going or what they were going to do, but content to wait and find out. Whiel he _was_ bored, just as Remy was, he had plenty in his mind to occupy him if he needed. There were plenty of things floating around in there begging to be looked at, analyzed, and picked apart. So many things had happened lately that he hadn’t had the time to process yet. There was no way he was going to be able to, though, until Remy mellow out a little. His excess energy was just too distracting.

Logan led them down to the lakeside. There he stopped them. He reached out and took hold of Remy’s shoulders, turning him and setting him firmly in place. Then he stepped back and off to the side. “All right, Gumbo. We’re gonna get you calm. Move with me. You know how this works.”

There was a feeling in their bond that was almost like relief. Almost, but not quite. More like—the promise of relief to come. Spencer watched with interest as the two men start slowly moving through a set of katas. The graceful elegance of the moves was enough to hold Spencer's attention. But it was the way that Remy’s emotions slowly started to even out in his mind that really had the genius relaxing. He stood and watched them for a few minutes. Then he gave in to the feeling and folded himself down to the grass. He didn’t even think about it as he folded down into a typical meditation pose.

The afternoon sun shone warmly down on them, perfectly offset by the cool breeze that had the water lapping at the shores. Spencer felt himself relaxing even further, which in turn relaxed Remy even more. A look around showed that there was no one close by. Once he was sure of that, Spencer took a deep breath and then let him shields open. The soothing wash of Logan and Remy’s emotions added to the tranquility of the afternoon. It felt natural to close his eyes and let his mind clear, drifting down into that meditative place.

The emotions of the past few days washed over and through Spencer. In here, they didn’t hurt him. Here he could look at them, recognize them, and let them go. The grief that sat constantly with him now faded away to almost nothing. The worry, the exhaustion, all of it just faded into the background. He didn’t seek out answers as he often did in meditation. He didn’t try to sort through the mess of his life. He just opened himself and let the peaceful tranquility of the afternoon flood him until everything else just faded away.


	17. Chapter 17

The next few days found the boys settling back into their routines here at the mansion. They started their training once more, working hard to understand their bond and to try and train themselves on how to cope with it. Not just the distance, but how to cope with things that might happen while they were apart. Their schedule was just slightly different than it had been before Vegas, though. Then, they had spent the morning being separated, would come back together for lunch where they’d go off privately and eat together to reconnect, and then the afternoon was spent with Remy in the Danger Room and Spencer in with Hank. Now, things were just a bit different.

In the mornings, Spencer went down to the Med Labs with Hank and Jean and spent the morning there studying medicine underneath Hank’s tutelage, with Jean there quietly observing Spencer to make sure he stayed okay. Since the incident with Remy on the Blackbird, Jean had been rather quiet towards them, though not rude. It made Remy reluctant to leave Spencer alone with her, but Spencer had pulled him aside to talk to him about it and he managed to soothe him down. Reminding him that Hank would be there the entire time did help.

While Spencer was in the labs, Remy would go with Logan as far away as they could get without making the pair too uncomfortable. Then they’d set up wherever they were and they’d either spar, or run through some katas, or even just sit and talk. They talked quite a bit while they were away from the others that way. For all his gruffness and his growls, Logan cared about his friend and he could see Remy’s tension, see how hard this was for him. These moments were perfect for him to help his friend vent a little. And these sessions seemed to be helping, too. Though it may not seem like much to others, they were actually able to get a full half-mile apart now before the withdrawal symptoms started to become too much for Spencer.

Once the two came back together, they would instantly head off somewhere private for an hour. Whether it was Spencer's room, Remy’s room, or somewhere outside, they were guaranteed one hour without interruption from anyone else in the house unless it was an emergency. They’d tried one time to skip that hour of private reconnection—they never tried that again. The two had sat at the table for lunch, pressed as close as their chairs would allow, and they got impossibly closer every time someone came anywhere near them. Halfway through the meal, Bishop had made the mistake of coming a little _too_ close to them. Spencer reflected later that they were lucky that Bishop could absorb Remy’s charge or they might’ve ended up missing a good half of the long table. After that, Charles made it clear that the two were to have one hour, uninterrupted, to reconnect after being separated.

After lunch, their afternoons were their own to do with as they pleased. This was when Remy often had his Danger Room sessions. While he did that, Spencer either shut himself away with the books that Hank loaned him, or he found himself settling in with notebook and pen. Just from his observation of the X-team, he had managed to come up with three different subjects for articles. One in sociology and two for psychology. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever publish them. Still, they were interesting to think about and writing them gave him something to do with himself. There was just so much for him to study in their behavior. The way they interacted with one another, the dynamic of being a team that didn’t just worked together, but lived together as well. The people here lived together, worked together, ate and played together. They did everything with each other, basically. It made for some stellar fights and some deep bonds. Add powers into the mix and it just made it even more interesting. The fact that they hadn’t killed one another or caused any serious damage was amazing.

All in all, things were going well. There was only one dark spot on the whole thing and that spot seemed to be growing bigger, like a stain, as each day went by. That spot was Rogue.

By the time a week had gone past, Spencer felt like he was walking around with a perpetual headache. He was doing everything in his power to try and be as accommodating to that woman as humanly possible and yet she never seemed pleased with it. Spencer respected the fact that the two were dating. Of course he respected it. The last thing he wanted to do was come between them. Though he knew that, really, he already had. Just the fact that their bond existed meant that he came between the two. But he was trying to make it as easy on her as possible. He encouraged Remy to go and spend time with her. When it looked like they wanted to do something and Remy was being too stubborn, or too dense, to realize that she wanted to do it alone, Spencer would make up excuses to leave them so that he wouldn’t play third wheel. When around her, he tried to keep the touching to a minimum. Not only did it seem rude to blatantly touch someone’s boyfriend right in front of them, it seemed even more rude knowing that touch was something denied to her anyways because of her powers. He’d even taken to making sure that he and Remy stayed in their own beds at night.

For all that he was trying, it seemed like none of his efforts were appreciated. Rogue always felt of anger and jealousy anytime that he was around. The closer to Remy he got, the worse it got. She was good about trying to cover it up, though. Remy’s charm was basically a low level empathy and it let him not only ‘charm’ people, influencing their moods, but it gave him the ability to at least lightly read them. It made sense, really. How could you charm someone if you didn’t know what they were feeling? That little empathy allowed him to pick up on some of what Rogue was feeling. He had to have said something to her, because one day she suddenly started working to cover it up, at least when Remy was around. When Remy wasn’t around…that was something else entirely. Spencer worked hard to avoid her then. She practically flung negative emotions at him when there was no one else around. Spencer's shields felt like they were taking a constant battering when he was around her. Because of that, he found himself escaping back to his room or outside more and more often.

A week and a half after their return from Vegas, Spencer was once more hiding outside, trying to find a little peace in the sunshine. He was walking down by the water and trying to keep his mind calm as he sifted through his thoughts. Getting too upset would only worry Remy, which was the one thing that Spencer constantly fought to prevent lately. It was a hell of a juggling act, trying to keep his emotions under control and keep them from bugging Remy too much. He knew it didn’t work all that well. There was no way to truly _hide_ what he felt. But he was a pro at pushing his emotions down so far that not even he really felt them. Then they just turned into a sort of muted background noise. There, but not all consuming.

Today, though, he couldn’t keep his thoughts from drifting around. He’d heard a conversation when he’d come down from his room that he couldn’t get out of his mind. His plan had been to go to the kitchen and get himself some coffee. Only, just as he was getting ready to open the door, he’d heard Rogue’s voice from inside. That alone had been enough to make him hesitate. When he heard what she was talking about, he froze in place, knowing that he shouldn’t eavesdrop and yet unable to help himself.

“Rems is going crazy.” Rogue was telling whoever was in there with her. “You know him! The swamp rat aint used to not doing anything. An all because of that Fed, he’s stuck here at the house all the time.” The disgust on the word ‘Fed’ was obvious.

“It’s not Spencer's fault.” That was Bobby, defending Spencer. He and Spencer had talked a few times and, while they weren’t really good friends, per se, they got along well enough.

“Yeah, well, maybe it is. I mean, they could go out on missions together if he was actually worth anything out in the field. If he had some useful skill out there, he could just come along and help. Then Rem could actually get out there and do something. Instead, he’s stuck with a partner that can’t fight, can’t even defend himself. How pathetic is that?”

Spencer hadn’t needed to hear anymore. Before anyone could say anything else, he’d turned on his heel and walked away. He hadn’t even realized at first that he was heading outside. All he’d thought about was getting away from there. The words she’d said had struck too close to home for him. Though they were said out of maliciousness, that didn’t take away from the truth of them. He didn’t know how to fight. In a fight he would be a liability. Remy would have to spend more time defending him than helping out others. Rogue was right. That _was_ pathetic. But what could he do about it?

 _Learn to fight_ his mind pointed out.

That thought brought a small scowl to Spencer's face. He didn’t _want_ to fight. He didn’t want to hurt someone. And he really, really didn’t want to be hurt. Fighting had never been his strong suit and he inevitably ended up hurt far worse than his opponent. Words had always been his weapon. When words didn’t work, his long legs came in handy. Or, at the Bureau, he’d had his gun in case things went really bad. Even then, he’d hated to use it. He hated to hurt people. Maybe he was weak, like people said. Maybe he was pathetic for not wanting to hurt other people. Or maybe it had something to do with his empathy, which allowed him to feel the pain he inflicted on others. Whatever it was, hurting people was one of the hardest things for him to do. Taking a life was the worst. It ripped him apart in ways he’d never been able to make others understand. Now that he had this newfound ability to heal—an ability that not only had him _wanting_ to heal people, but actually had him _needing_ to help when he was anywhere near someone that was hurt—this aversion to hurting people only seemed to grow stronger.

 _Deliberately hurting people is one thing._ His thought to himself. _Knowing how to defend myself is something else entirely. Just because I don’t want to hurt people doesn’t mean I should leave myself open to be hurt. There’s nothing wrong with knowing self-defense. If someone is trying to hurt Remy or myself, I should be able to defend us. I should be able to keep myself safe enough that I won’t be such a liability for him._

“Looks like you’re thinking awfully deep thoughts.”

The deep voice suddenly intruding on his thoughts had Spencer jumping back so fast he almost tumbled down to the ground. It was only a quick hand to his arm that kept him on his feet. Wide eyes locked on Logan’s face. “Woah there, pup.” Logan said, steadying him. He waited until he was sure Spencer was steady on his feet and then he let go, taking a step back. “Didn’t mean to scare ya.”

Spencer took a calming breath to settle his racing heart. He made sure to take a second to send a wave of reassurance down the bond to Remy to make sure that the man wouldn’t come running from feeling Spencer's fear. That was their sort of silent ‘I’m okay’ code. Only when he got the affection back from Remy that signaled he understood did he finally answer Logan. “It’s okay, Logan. I was far too lost in thought. I didn’t hear you coming.”

“You looked like something’s bugging you. Anything I can do to help?”

As he looked at this feral man who was slowly becoming a very dear friend, Spencer debated unloading his troubles a little bit. Logan would listen, he knew. He would listen to Spencer ramble the whole thing out and he’d most likely have some advice, too. _He might even offer to help. Logan would teach me self-defense if I asked him_. That thought had him truly stopping and thinking. His head tipped to the side while he turned that thought over in his mind. He didn’t think about the fact that Logan was still standing there waiting for an answer. The man didn’t say anything; he just waited for Spencer to work through whatever was in his head.

The idea of Logan teaching him self-defense was a good one. The best person to teach him would, of course, be Remy. But Spencer found himself reluctant to do that. He didn’t want Remy to know just how pitiful his self-defense abilities were. Better to have someone else do it. Logan was a good choice for that. He knew what he was doing and he was infinitely patient with Spencer. Plus, there was the added bonus of his healing factor, which meant that whatever damage Spencer did to him wouldn’t actually _hurt_ him in the long run. Plus, it would probably be a smart idea to have teacher that was pretty much indestructible for when Remy finally found out what was going on and had his tantrum over someone daring to lay hands on Spencer. He knew that Remy would freak out with the first bruise he found on Spencer's body.

But…if—when—Remy freaked out, things might get a little out of hand. Spencer firmly believed that the Protector was a feral, primal part of Remy, and setting two ferals against one another was a recipe for trouble.

Still half in thought, Spencer shook his head. “No. There’s nothing you can do, Logan.”

There was only a slight emphasis on the word ‘you’. Latching on to that, Logan asked “Can someone else help you?”

That was a good question to ask. Spencer ran through a list of house residents in his mind. He dismissed most of them rather quickly. When he came to one, he stopped. _Perfect_. “Yes, actually.” Blinking his eyes, he cleared his gaze enough that he was actually seeing his friend now, not just looking beyond him. “Do you happen to know where Ororo is?”

If he was surprised by Spencer's request, he didn’t show it. “Sun’s out. I’d guess she’s at her gardens.”

Spencer gave him an absent “Thank you” and started to drift off that direction. He felt Logan fall into step beside him and didn’t protest it. He was too busy marveling at not thinking of this solution sooner. Ororo was the perfect choice. She, just like everyone else here, knew how to fight. All of the X-Men did. She was also kind and patient, and patience was something he would need from his teacher. She was built slender, as was he, so she would know how to defend with a smaller body mass, unlike the men in this house. She was female and he would definitely handle a female touching or coming at him better than he would a man. Plus, she was Remy’s honorary baby sister. Even if he got mad over this, there’s no way he would ever do anything to hurt Ororo. All in all, she was a perfect choice. Now he just had to bring himself to ask her.

They found her in her gardens just as Logan had predicted. At the sound of their footsteps, she lifted her head and looked their direction. Her smile was warm and her face bright with pleasure at seeing them. That was one thing Spencer truly enjoyed about the weather goddess. She was always pleased to see anyone who came to visit her and she was never shy about letting it be known. She had also spent enough time with Remy that she’d perfected what Remy and Spencer called the ‘empathic hug’, a burst of goodwill emotions that were the equivalent of being hugged emotionally. She sent him one now as she greeted them both. “Logan, Spencer! What a pleasure! What brings you to my gardens this beautiful afternoon?”

“Hey, Ro.” Logan greeted her. “Just getting out of the house for a bit, myself.”

Spencer sent her back the same hug and enjoyed the smile it gave her. His empathy had always allowed him to project, but since his bonding and the increase in his strength, he found he had a much finer control. It was easy for him to project just to her without any of it leaking over to Logan. “Good afternoon, Ororo. I was actually hoping I might steal a moment of your time.”

“Absolutely.” Immediately she sat back on her heels and pulled her hands back from her weeding. She dusted them off and then pushed up from the ground so that she was on her feet by the time they reached her.

Now that it came time to ask, Spencer found himself actually a little nervous. How the hell was he going to do this without coming off looking like an idiot? Would she think him pathetic, the same as Rogue had said? Would she laugh at him? Maybe this was a bad idea. After all, the academy hadn’t been able to teach him self-defense, and Derek hadn’t been able to teach him either. Why should he bother asking her to try and help him at something that was most likely hopeless?

Before his thoughts could truly run away with him and break down his resolve, he was cut off from them by a hand on his arm. “Spencer.” Ororo was looking at him with such a tender, worried expression on her face. “What is the matter?”

“I just, well, it’s just that…” Spencer paused and blew out a breath, thoroughly frustrated with himself. “I feel like an idiot.”

“Well you are far from that.” She teased him.

A smile touched his lips. “Only in some ways. In others, I’m far more ignorant than I like.” _Come on, quit stalling and just do this! This is just Ororo and Logan here. Neither one of them is going to laugh at me. They’re two of the kindest people in this whole house._ “It’s actually one of those others that I’m here about. I was hoping, well, I wanted to ask you if you might help me. You don’t have to, of course. If you said no I would understand completely. I don’t want you to feel like you have to. It’s just that I wasn’t sure who else to ask in the house and you seemed like the very best option for so many different reasons, but I don’t want you to feel pressured into this. I would understand completely if you said no. I mean…”

“Spencer, Spencer!” Ororo cut him off with a delighted little laugh. Her eyes were sparkling as she looked up at him. “Why don’t you ask me what it is you need my help with so I know what it is we’re talking about, here?”

“Oh.” Oops. His cheeks heated just a little bit. _Idiot_. Pulling in a bracing breath, he blurted out “Would you help teach me self-defense?”

To his amazement, she didn’t even bat an eye at his request. Her smile grew a little wider and she nodded almost immediately. “I’d be honored.”

He couldn’t help his shock. “Really?”

“Yes, of course.”

The easy way she said yes left him stunned. He hadn’t expected that at all. There was no qualifications to her answer, no laughter or teasing, no mockery. Not even a small joke. Just, yes. Did she understand all it was she was agreeing to here? “I’ve been told I’m rather hopeless in this area, I should warn you. The Bureau had to make exceptions in pretty much everything physical at the academy just to allow me into the field. Not even Morgan was able to really teach me much. I’ve always been much better with words than with physical action.”

She patted him with the hand that she’d left on his arm. “Maybe they just weren’t teaching you right, Spencer.”

“Ro’s a good choice.” Logan chimed in. He’d been quietly standing beside them this whole time, just watching them. Now he added his input to the conversation. “The people that taught you were probably built more like the other guys on your team. You’re a skinny guy, Stretch. You need someone that can teach how to use your size and speed to your advantage. Ro’s good for that. She’s a slick one.”

A devilish little smile touched Ororo’s lips. A hint of the imp that Remy often called her peeked out through her eyes. “Besides, my brother will not harm me for bruising you.”

They all had a laugh at that. “That was a big factor in my choice.” Spencer agreed, smiling.

“When did you want to start, Spencer?”

“Whenever is good for you. Morning is the only time that I’m busy. Otherwise, my time is wide open.”

“Well, then.” Her smile grew and she patted at his arm before dropping her hand. “There’s no time like the present. There’s a bit of the yard back here behind my greenhouse that’s perfectly sheltered to keep us out of view from everyone else. Why don’t you go and change into comfortable clothes and meet me back there in about fifteen minutes?”

Spencer fought back his nerves and made himself nod at her. He set off towards the house, not realizing that the two people left there watched him walk away. Ororo waited until Spencer was out of sight before she spoke. “Something prompted this. I don’t know what, but something has him worrying.”

“I don’t know about the ‘what’, but I got a pretty good guess on the ‘who’.” Logan growled out.

Anger briefly flashed through Ororo’s eyes. “She better not have threatened him. She’ll find it is not only my brother she’ll have to deal with if it comes to that.”

“I don’t think she cares, darlin.”

“She will care if it causes her to lose him. I tried to warn her; if forced to choose, Remy is going to choose Spencer. Their bond won’t allow for anything else, even if he wanted it, and I do not believe he would want to let Spencer go.”

The way she said that had Logan looking over at her sharply. He saw something in her eyes that made his lips curve. “I didn’t think anyone else noticed.”

“I don’t think anyone else has.” She agreed with him. “I don’t think even they realize it yet. But I know Remy well. I see the way he looks at Spencer and the way he lights up when he speaks of him. The attraction is there whether either one realizes it. I can only hope it will continue to grow. Spencer is much better for Remy than Rogue ever can be.”

Logan looked back up towards the house and let out a snort. “You got that right.”

CXCX

Hours later Spencer dragged himself back in the house. If he had entertained any notions of Ororo going easy on him because of worry over Remy getting upset, or because he wasn’t as talented, or any other reason, she had quickly disabused him of that notion. He felt sore from head to toe and muscles that he hadn’t even known could ache were letting him know just how unhappy they were. Spencer considered it a small miracle that Remy hadn’t already come tearing out of the mansion to find out just what the hell was going on with his bondmate. He had to have felt the pain and the turmoil of Spencer's emotions. He knew Remy felt it, too, because he could feel the anger in his partner and the Protector vying for dominance, just barely held back. Spencer periodically sent reassurance to the man to try and help him keep the Protector in check. It seemed to be working.

Ororo had worked Spencer hard, walking him through some basic steps first and then stepping back and telling him “Okay, Spencer. The best way to learn is to be forced to learn. Words only get us so far. You’ve had plenty of people try to help you in controlled settings. We’re going to try something a little different. Your goal is to pin me.” And with no more warning than that, she’d launched herself at him.

It was definitely a different way than anyone else had taught him. Ororo didn’t hold herself back. She pinned him time and time again, knocking him down to the ground so many times that Spencer was surprised he hadn’t bitten off his tongue from as many times as his teeth had jarred together. She was fast and tricky and she packed a lot more muscle than one would think at first glance.

By the end of the lesson, Spencer hadn’t managed to pin her once. Still, she had congratulated him when they were done. He’d wiped at his face with the towel she gave him and let out a low laugh. “Congratulations? For what? Proving I’m talented at hitting the ground?”

“For learning.” She told him calmly. She was drying her face as well, not quite as sweaty as he was. “You held out longer and longer each time, Spencer. That’s learning. I didn’t expect you to be able to win on your first lesson. But now I do know what your skill level is. Tomorrow, we’ll concentrate on some of those areas that you need to work on the most, and I’ll show you a few of the moves I used on you today.”

Tomorrow. Great. Spencer mentally grumbled to himself while he went inside and started towards his room. Just what the hell had he gotten himself into?

He was halfway to his room when a mental knock came to the edge of his shields. He braced himself and lowered them just enough to let Charles in. The man was careful as always, keeping his emotions in check so that they wouldn’t be painful. _//How are you feeling, Dr. Reid?//_

Spencer gave a purely mental snort. _//Tired. Sore. Ororo is quite the taskmaster//_

_//She’ll be a wonderful teacher for you. You were smart to ask her//_

_//I’ll try to remind myself of that frequently over the next few days//_ Spencer had reached his room by now and he happily made his way inside. Though he knew that Charles couldn’t actually _see_ him right at the moment, he still held off on stripping the way that he wanted to. That just seemed too—exposed, right now. He settled for bending down to start to unlace his shoes. Halfway down, he realized that his body didn’t quite want to bend like that yet. His legs wobbled a little and he gave in to the urge to flop down to the ground with a low thud that sent an ache through him. He pushed it down and reached for his shoe laces. _//Not to sound rude, sir, but was there something that you needed? I was planning on trying to make my way to the tub//_

_//Yes. I wanted to, ah, warn you. When I discovered what you two were going to do earlier, I took the precaution of having Remy sent to a training session in the Danger Room. Scott locked the program so that Remy has been unable to leave the room. However, the session is just coming to a close and I thought I should warn you that he’s going to be released here shortly and I fear he is going to make straight for you. He is none too pleased with any of us, even with Scott informing him what was going on//_

That stopped Spencer in his tracks. He closed his eyes and gave in to the urge to groan. Great. Just, great. This was going to be fantastic. _//Well, at least that explains why he hadn’t shown up already. I was wondering about that//_

 _//I’m sorry, Dr. Reid//_ And he really did sound apologetic. _//But I thought that it might be easier for you two to have this confrontation alone in your room instead of out there with Ororo. You are the only one that can handle him when the Protector comes out//_

_//Yes, sir. Go ahead and let Scott know he’s safe to release him at any time. And, please, if you could, would you mind keeping people away from our room for a while?//_

_//I will//_ Charles agreed. Then, flavored with just a hint of dry humor, _//The best of luck to you, Spencer//_

Spencer rolled his eyes as he felt Charles withdraw his touch. _Yeah, thanks_ he thought sarcastically. A second later he felt a flair of satisfaction flash through their bond and he knew; Remy was on his way. For a second Spencer looked down at himself and debated. The he shrugged one shoulder and just sat and waited. Remy was still controlling himself at the moment but he would still want to check over his bondmate and care for him. Spencer could feel that need in him. Why not just wait and let him do what he had to do? It would save Spencer the trouble of doing some of it while having the benefit of helping soothe Remy down a little. And judging by the emotions that were getting stronger as the man quickly got closer, soothing was definitely what Remy needed.

It only took a few minutes before there was a knock at the door. Spencer was surprised and then pleased that Remy had actually stopped to think of something like that. “It’s unlocked!” he called out.

Remy opened the door and his eyes immediately went down to the ground where Spencer was at. In two strides he was in the door, the door snapped shut behind him, and he was dropping down to one knee at Spencer's side. Not giving Remy time to say anything, Spencer gave him a tired smile and hurried to explain himself. “I’m fine, Remy, I promise. You can check me over yourself to make sure. I don’t mind.”

That was all the permission that Remy needed. Careful hands caught Spencer and started to do a check from head to toe. Spencer endured it easily, continuing his explanation while those gentle hands worked over his face and neck. “This is all my own fault, Remy. I asked Ororo to help me learn a little self-defense and I discovered that she’s a far better instructor than I could’ve hoped for. She did exactly what I asked and didn’t treat me with kid gloves. If you’re going to be angry, be angry with me, not her.”

“Remy aint angry about dat.”  His hands glided down, going to Spencer's shoulders. When one spot he touched made Spencer hiss, he moved the shirt just enough to be able to sneak a look, and his touch lightened just a little. His eyes darted up to Spencer's face. “Remy’s annoyed dat y’ didn’t t’ink to try an give a lil warnin’ instead of having Scotty lock him in de Danger Room.”

“I didn’t know they were going to do that.” Spencer hurried to say. “And I, well, I didn’t think about warning you. This was kind of…spur of the moment. It wasn’t something that I had planned or anything like that. I asked for her help and she suggested that I go change and we could start today. Then I was too caught up in things to think about coming to warn you. But you’re absolutely right—I should have, and I’m sorry.” Spencer's words cut off on a low groan as Remy hit another sore muscle.

He touched another sore muscle and Spencer's words cut off on a low groan. That had Remy freezing. Abruptly he sat back and fixed his eyes on Spencer's face. “Dis aint gonna work like dis. Y’ need a bath to relax dem muscles b’fore dey tense up on y’ any more dan dey already is. Y’ t’ink y’ can get y’r shoes off while Remy starts de water?”

“Yes.” Oh, man, a bath. That was what he’d been dying for.

He got his shoes and socks both off while Remy went into the private bath and started the water. When Remy came back out, he helped Spencer to his feet and drew him over to the bathroom. Spencer didn’t realize until too late just what he was getting himself into here. When Remy got him in the bathroom, he fully expected the man to turn around and walk out. He really should’ve known better. Remy didn’t go anywhere. In fact, he caught hold of Spencer's arm and told him “Here, let Remy help y’. Y’r probably not gonna wanna lift y’r arm dat high right yet.” He carefully drew Spencer's sleeve out enough to slip his arm down and inside.

Spencer gaped at him for a second while Remy switched from one side to the other. When both arms were in his shirt and Remy started to reach for the hem to strip him, he found his voice once more. “I’m perfectly capable of stripping myself, Remy. I don’t need you in here to help me undress.”

That didn’t stop him. Remy drew the shirt up and over Spencer's head, cutting off his words. He tossed the shirt over to the dirty clothes basket that was against the wall. “Aint no shame in getting a little help, _mon ami_.”

Remy’s hands went to the waistband of Spencer's sweatpants and he had them sliding down before Spencer could stop him. Heat flooded Spencer's cheeks. “Remy!”

It finally seemed to register with Remy just how much he was embarrassing his partner. He looked up from where he’d been cataloging any bruises he saw and his eyes focused once more on Spencer's face. He took in the annoyed and embarrassed expression, the bright red color to Spencer's cheeks, and his own look softened slightly. One hand came up to gently cup Spencer's cheek. “Spencer, cher, y’ aint got no reason to be embarrassed here.”

That was easy for _him_ to say. He wasn’t the one standing here mostly naked! Spencer wrapped his arms around his waist and tried to battle past his shyness and discomfort. How could Remy expect him to just be relaxed? He didn’t like even taking his shirt off in front of most people. Did Remy really think he was going to strip him down in here and help him into the tub? Absolutely not! There was no way that was going to happen.

The hand on his cheek slid down until Remy had a knuckle under his chin. He used that to tip Spencer's face up. Compassionate eyes were watching him with an almost tender expression in them. “Y’r safe in here, Penny. I won’t hurt y’ and I won’t let anyone else, either. Y’ve got no reason to be afraid.” The seriousness of his words was reflected in the way he switched from third person speech to first person. It gave his words just a little extra weight. “Dere’s a part of me dat wants to take care of y’ right now, cher. Y’r hurt, y’r bruised, and I jus’ wanna help y’ feel better, dat’s all. Dat’s what I was tryin’ to do here. I didn’t mean to scare y’.”

“I, I don’t…I don’t like being ex-exposed in front of people.” His arms tightened around himself while memories danced in the back of his mind. Memories of being cornered in the as a kid in the locker room at school, or as an adult in the locker room at work, or at the gym the one time he’d gone. Memories of the football team grabbing him, stripping him, pressing him back against the goalpost as that rope circled his wrists. Other memories, other times, hands there, pawing at him, people staring, laughing.

That sunshine that was so particular to their bond, a sensation that Spencer had never felt anywhere else, poured into him and pushed back the shadows, replacing them with warmth. Remy moved just one step closer until Spencer felt the heat of him against his skin the same as he felt the heat of him down inside of him. Their eyes locked and something inside of Spencer, something low down in his stomach, started to unfurl. Something strange and wonderful all at the same time. His breath caught in his throat.

Whatever spell was weaving around them was shattered suddenly when the two men felt an urgent knock at the edge of their shielding. They froze in place, just a breath apart. Together, they lowered them, letting Charles in. His voice spoke to both of them at the same time. _//We’ve got a situation. One of our shelters has been bombed this evening and we have dozens of wounded that need medical attention and safe transport out. The group that attacked is still there. We need all hands for this – your talents especially could come in handy, Dr. Reid. But I can’t force you two to take that risk. If you’re willing, report to the Blackbird immediately//_

There was no need for them to stop and think about it. They didn’t even have to confer with one another to come up with a decision. They sent their affirmative to Charles while they turned and hurried out to the main room. Spencer grabbed a pair of slacks and pulled them on. He caught the shirt that Remy tossed his way—a t-shirt that Remy had left in here a while ago. It was a little big but it worked. Spencer didn’t really care what he looked like. As soon as he was dressed, the two men set out from the room side by side, each one thinking to what lay ahead while trying hard not to think of the moment they’d just left behind.


	18. Chapter 18

It was almost like being back at work. Spencer had that vague thought as he sat in the Blackbird, waiting for them to arrive at their destination. There was the same feel in the air like there was when the team was about to go on a big bust. Spencer had felt it before when riding in with SWAT. A sort of preparedness in the air. A readiness for the trouble they all knew was waiting ahead. Everyone was in uniform, sitting in their seats, all totally alert without any of the usual commentary or bickering that he had come to associate with them. This wasn’t the time for it. What was waiting ahead was very serious.

“The shelter was bombed about twenty minutes ago.” Scott told them all. “FOH found out the location and they stirred up the local community to help them take the place down. The people there were using an old YMCA building for their shelter. According to reports, the place was packed full when the bombs went off.”

Spencer winced at the images that brought to mind. He’d seen the devastation caused by bombings before. What lay ahead wasn’t going to be pretty.

Scott had paused to allow everyone their reaction time. In the same hard voice, he continued. “We’re going to come in for a landing on the roof of a nearby building. First priority is getting Beast and Spencer into the building so they can start working with the patients. Next is securing a path from the Blackbird to the shelter. Once it’s secured, we need to keep it secure. We’re going to be loading as many as we can out of there and getting them to safety, Everyone keep in mind, our goal here is to care for the wounded and get people safely out of there. There are cops outside the building that are trying to control the crowd and get everyone calm once more. Let them handle that part. We’ll need to keep an eye out for any more FOH trying to take advantage of our arrival to take out even more mutants.”

As Scott started to assign jobs to different people, Spencer and Hank moved to the back of the jet to begin their own preparations. They were putting together medical bags from the supplies that had been loaded and they were trying to prepare themselves for anything that they might find. Spencer knew that what was ahead wasn’t going to be easy. Not in the least bit. It was going to be very, very hard. His power was going to truly be put to the test tonight. Also, what little skills he’d learned from Hank recently. Tonight he was going to have to make sure to put into practice what had only been a theory in his head so far. He was going to have to use what little medical training he had to try and take care of the easier injuries and save his powers for the things that were truly important, or else he’d risk burning himself out too fast.

“We’ll have to start triage first.” Hank told him as he stuffed a roll of bandages down into his bag.

“Do we have any triage tags?”

Bending down and reaching into a cupboard, Hank pulled out what looked like two fanny packs. He tossed one to Spencer. “Triage tape kit.” He explained as Spencer looked down at the bag. “Do you know your colors?”

“Red, immediate, first priority. Yellow, delayed, second. Green, third. Black, deceased or almost.” Spencer rattled off easily. He pulled the pack to his waist and started to reach the straps around the back when another pair of hands caught his and took the straps from him. Remy pulled the straps back and hooked them together and then adjusted it for him. Spencer shot him a grateful look before going back to his conversation with Hank. “I’ll be of more use with the people that are given up for dead, or deemed too dangerous to move. The ones that everyone thinks are going to be dead anyways. You’re the medical professional here, Hank. You’re their best hope in that area. I’ll triage as I go, but I’m going to try and focus mostly on the worst of the cases. If you come across someone that doesn’t look like they’re going to make it, shout to me.”

“Not Hank, cher. Beast.” Remy said, resting a hand on his shoulder. “We get out dem doors, y’ gotta remember dat. Out dere, y’ gotta use our codenames. It’s fo’ everyone’s safety.”

“We should call you something different as well.” Hank pointed out.

Spencer shrugged one shoulder. It was Remy who answered for him. “Jus’ call him like he is—Healer. Fo’ t’night, dat’ll work. Dat’s what he’s gonna be anyways.”

A call went through the jet to let everyone know they were coming in for a landing and all conversation cut off. It was time to get to work.

CXCX

Having worked at the BAU, Spencer had helped to catch plenty of serial killers, arsonists, bombers, and plenty of other people that had done horrible things. He’d seen death and destruction in so many different forms. He had made a career of studying human behavior and using what he learned to help him catch these people and put them away. Yet as he looked at the devastation where there had once been a shelter, he knew he would never really understand how a person could do these kinds of things. How could people justify doing something like this? And how could the crowd still being restrained by the police barricade not see just how horrifying this truly was?

It looked like a scene from a warzone. Where there had once been a building there was now just rubble. There were people moving around in that rubble, pulling bodies out here and there. Too few people. Most of the people there that should’ve been helping to look for wounded were instead trying to help with crowd control. The whole front of the building near the street was packed full of an angry mob that was barely being held back by the police presence and a small barricade.

All the wounded were being pulled to the side between where the shelter had been and the building next to it, the one that the Blackbird had landed on top of. That place was the most heavily guarded. There were bodies packed in side by side in there, very few of them moving. Spencer could feel their pain screaming out at him. He’d felt it from the minute the Blackbird had started to land. It pushed up to him, wrapped around him, calling out to that place inside where the Healer in him was. Need filled Spencer in a way it never had before. That need to heal that he’d felt before when healing small injuries at the mansion was nothing compared to this. A drop of water to a tsunami. A pebble to a mountain.

When they reached the triage area the first jolt of all that raw pain right up close was almost enough to send Spencer to his knees. Remy’s bracing hands were the only thing that kept him from really hitting the ground. Someone behind them whispered “Holy shit” and Spencer mentally echoed that sentiment. All around him were bodies lying there with injuries in various degrees of severity. They were lying on cement, on blankets, on makeshift blankets that looked like they were someone’s clothes. Blood and dirt covered them all. Men, women, children, adults, elderly, people of all age, sex and ethnicity were lying here. When they’d said the shelter had been full, they weren’t kidding. There were so many people here and Spencer could feel the pain of so many more up ahead in the rubble.

The low sound of someone moaning in pain was what yanked Spencer out of his shock. He’d only been frozen for just a few breaths, but even that was too long. There was no time for shock. No time for horror. Ruthlessly he shoved those down. In that instant his control snapped firmly into place and he straightened up from Remy’s supportive hold. The rest of the X-Men were already moving to go and help out in the places that Scott had assigned them to. Spencer patted Remy’s arm to let him know that he was steady now and told him “Go ahead and do what you have to. I’m fine.”

“Gambit’s right where he needs to be. Tell him what y’ need.”

There wasn’t time to argue. Spencer was already moving forward, bringing himself to the bodies nearest him. “Help start the triage. If you stick close enough, we can share the pouch and start getting people labeled twice as fast.”

What came next was like nothing Spencer had ever felt before in his life. Working disaster scenes before hadn’t prepared him for this. He’d thought he’d known what to expect with his empathy; he’d forgotten entirely how much stronger it was now. It was almost impossible for him to block out the pain he was feeling around him. Add in that need to heal, to take away the pain, and it made it infinitely harder. Spencer threw himself into what he was doing with everything he had.

After a little bit of working triage, he passed the bag with the tape over to Remy and told him to continue on. Then he turned his attention to the patients and started to hunt out any of the ones marked with the red or black tape. The black tape ran the risk of being dead, but they also covered the ones that were _almost_ dead. Those were ones that only he would be able to help if they could be helped at all.

For the next hour Spencer worked his way through the patients that were brought here. He went to the ones that were the worst off, the ones with almost no hope, and he worked through them first. He healed what could needed to be healed to ensure survival and he left the rest of their injuries to be tended to by Hank. At some point Remy joined him again and they worked side by side. When Spencer finished with a patient, Remy was there to trade out the tape for him, assigning them a new color so Hank would know. He also helped bandage the other injuries that were left behind to help the people hold over until Hank arrived.

Spencer worked harder than he’d ever worked before. He pushed himself to the limits and stretched his strength out as far as he could go. Whenever he could, he combined their energy, using not just his own but the patient’s as well, helping to conserve his and keep him going longer. There were just so many people that needed help. He dealt with injuries that would’ve had him flinching or even gagging at any other time. He lasted through that first hour, longer than he thought he would, before the loss of energy and the constant battering of their emotions started to get to him. When he stumbled as he knelt by his patient, Remy caught him and helped steady him once more. “Y’r wearing out, cher.” Remy sounded worried and Spencer could feel the emotion rolling off him.

Reaching over, he patted Remy’s hand. “I’ll be fine. Just burning a little low right now.” Tired or not, it didn’t matter and they both knew it. These people needed help. There was no way that Spencer could ignore that.

The little inflow of energy that Remy had been sending steadily over their bond now increased a little. Spencer took it gratefully for a moment before pushing some of it back down. The last thing he needed was for Remy to start to be drained as well. If anyone came after them, or if any of the remaining crowd broke through, he needed the man to be able to help defend them.

Thankfully, most of the crowd had dispersed by now. Between the police and the X-Men, control had been gained. Even caught up in the mob mentality, no one wanted to take on the X-Men. Only a few diehards remained and they were kept back behind the barrier. That left the X-Men free to start moving through the wreckage. Jean was currently over using her TK to help lift debris out of the way. Rogue was helping as well, using her strength to help clear the way as well. Ororo was moving among the wounded, as were Warren and Bobby. Kurt, Logan and Bishop were out in the rubble helping to carry out the injured that were capable of being moved.

A sudden voice caught Spencer's attention. “Healer! Healer, over here!”

With Remy’s help he managed to push up to his feet. A quick look showed him that it was Scott calling out to him from out towards the middle of the rubble. Spencer and Remy quickly made their way out towards him. Remy led, picking out a clear and safe path. When they got close it was easy to see why Scott had called him. There was a man lying there pinned underneath a piece of what looked like concrete. Half of his body had to be almost crushed. There was no way to move him without causing more damage. Jean was nearby, prepared to lift the object off as soon as they were ready.

The duo moved right up to the man and dropped down beside him. To his horror, Spencer saw the man was awake. Awake and in agony. Moving this slab was just going to make that pain worse. Spencer quickly put his hand on the man’s arm and he used his empathy to put a block on his pain. It didn’t block what Spencer felt from him, but it kept the man from having to feel it. He watched the tense features relax almost instantly. Spencer tried to put on his most reassuring smile. “Hey there. I’m a healer and I’m here to help you. Can you tell me your name?”

“Josiah.” The man croaked out.

“Hey there, Josiah. Like I said, we’re going to help you out, okay? My friend there, she’s going to lift this slab up off of you and then we’re going to pull you back. I’ve got a block up so you shouldn’t feel anything, but there’s a chance some pain could leak through, okay? I want you to be prepared for that. And I need you to try not to move.” He waited for the man’s nod to show he understood. Once he had it, he looked up at Scott and Jean. He didn’t think about it as he took charge. “Phoenix, as soon as we’re in position, pull the slab up just a few inches. We don’t want to disturb too much of the rubble or it could shift and then we’ll be in trouble. Cyclops, I need you back here with Gambit. As soon as the slab gets high enough, pull him back. I’m going to stay alongside of him so I can keep my hand on him and keep the block up.”

Everyone moved into position. Spencer looked around one last time to make sure he had everything figured out and then he looked to Jean and gave her a nod. The four worked together almost perfectly. Jean lifted, Scott and Remy pulled, and Spencer moved right alongside them, never losing contact with his patient. As soon as he was free, Jean lowered the slab back down.

Spencer only spared a moment to make sure that moving the slab hadn’t caused anything to shift and then he turned back to his patient. The man looked calmer than before; the pain-block hadn’t shifted during the move, so he hadn’t felt any pain. He was watching Spencer carefully as the genius shifted to kneel closer to his shoulder. Spencer’s eyes quickly scanned the man’s body. “Okay, that part’s over with. You did great, Josiah. You did really great.” He brought his eyes back up to Josiah’s face and he gave another reassuring smile. “Now, I’ve got an important question for you, Josiah. Like I told you, I’m a healer. What that means is that I can use my powers and help to heal what’s wrong here. To do that, I have to reach in with my empathy. Are you okay with that?”

“Y-Yeah.” Josiah coughed a little, making the word stutter, but he gave them a surprising half smile. “Do any people actually answer no to that?”

“You’d be surprised.” Spencer told him absently. Now that he had permission, he didn’t wait a moment longer. He pulled on the energy inside of him and once more sent it down through his hand.

Spencer knew as soon as he started that this one was going to tax him. The damage was so great! It was everywhere inside of him. There was so much damage, so much that had to be repaired if they wanted Josiah to last even another few minutes. Spencer drew on more of his personal energy and worked as fast as he could to try and battle back death. It loomed over the edge of them like a dark shadow. Little by little, bit by bit, he battled it back, fighting to heal as fast as he possibly could, aiming for the very worst parts first. He clenched his teeth together against the pain and forced a little more strength into the healing. Almost there, almost there, almost…there!

A gasp slipped free as Spencer pulled back. Or, _fell_ back. Thank God Remy’s arms were there to catch him or he would’ve dropped straight down. They caught him up and wrapped supportively around him. Spencer clutched at the arm across his chest with shaking hands. For a moment his vision wavered a little and he was afraid he was going to pass out right there. Then he felt an inflowing of energy from Remy and the world started to even back out around him. It gave him enough strength to open his weary eyes and to find his voice once more. “I got the worst of it. There are still some broken bones, so don’t try moving.” He warned Josiah. He looked up to Scott, who was watching him with something that Spencer thought might be concern. “He’s going to need careful assistance out of here. As smooth of a ride as possible. Tell Hank that he’ll need surgery; I think there are bone fragments left in with his right leg. I didn’t heal as much there as I could because I didn’t know what would happen with those loose pieces still in there.”

“Got it.” Scott said.

Josiah reached past Scott, his hand briefly catching hold of Spencer's. “Thanks, Healer. Just…thanks.”

Spencer managed to drum up a small little smile, but that was all he had energy for. He leaned heavily into Remy and trusted over to his companion to help get him upright and moving. Through slitted eyes watched the ground in front of him and tried to carefully place his steps as Remy led him out of there. As soon as they were on stable ground, Spencer gave up watching where he was going and just closed his eyes, knowing that Remy wouldn’t let him fall.

God! He was beyond tired; he was _exhausted_. But when he found himself being pressed down on something, he immediately opened his eyes and looked around him for a patient. Instead, to his surprise, he found a cup thrust in front of him. “Here, take this.” Someone was telling him. It took a moment for Spencer to realize that it was coffee in that cup. God, coffee sounded Heavenly. Hell, _warm_ sounded Heavenly. Using up his internal energy seemed to have the bad side effect of stealing his body heat. Spencer took the cup and cradled it carefully between shaking hands. Thank God it was only half full. More than that and he probably would’ve been spilling it all over himself. He closed his eyes and let out a sigh as he took the first, bracing sip.

He felt a body slip down to sit beside him and even groggy he knew that body well enough to know who it was without even having to look. Remy slipped an arm around his waist and drew them a little closer together. “Sit an drink fo’ a bit, cher. Y’ve been burning all dat energy out. It’s time to put some back in y’.” He murmured lowly. Then he shifted and his voice changed, lifting ever so slightly as he spoke to whoever was close. “ _Merci_ fo’ de coffee. It’s just what he needs right now.”

“Anything, man.” That strange voice said. “There are a lot of us that wouldn’t be walking around right now if it wasn’t for him.”

A voice lifted up in the air, calling out a cry for help. “We got people here. I need a hand getting this moved!”

Spencer looked up and blinked his eyes a few times to clear his vision. A group of people was nearby, standing by a fallen section of wall, and they were trying to move part of it. Spencer could feel Remy tense beside him and that, plus the man’s emotions, told him what he wanted to do. Without having to think about it, Spencer patted Remy’s knee and gestured over there. “Go help.” He told his bondmate. “It’s not far away and I promise I’ll stay here. Go give them a hand.”

“I’ll watch out for him.” Said the guy who had brought Spencer the coffee. He was a middle aged looking man with dark hair and an easy smile. Spencer remembered him. He’d been beside one of the children that Spencer had helped. Uncle or Father, he figured.

Remy looked between the two briefly before he made up his mind. He gave Spencer a careful squeeze and a firm look. “Don’t move.”

“I’ll be a statue. They’ll have to use a crane to move me out of here.” Spencer promised dryly.

Just a hint of humor sparked in Remy’s face. He gave Spencer one last squeeze and then climbed to his feet and hurried over to join the others. Spencer watched him go and gave a shake of his head. He turned his attention back to the coffee in his hands and he took a refreshing drink of the warm liquid. Through his bangs, he looked up at the man still standing above him. “Thank you for the coffee. It’s wonderful.”

“You’re welcome. It’s the least I could do.” The guy smiled down at him. “Name’s Matt.”

Ignoring what everyone else had told him, Spencer didn’t hesitate to give his name in return. “I’m Spencer.” He looked around him, taking note of how much the scene was finally starting to clear. Those that had been healed and could move were slowly either emptying out to a different part of the area or they were helping with the relief efforts.  There were quite a few less lying around waiting for help than there had been before. Hank was still moving through them and Ororo was at his side, assisting.

Spencer turned his eyes back towards Matt. “You know, you don’t really have to stand here and watch out for me. Gambit’s just overprotective. I’ll be fine.”

Hooking his hands in his pockets, Matt gave him an amused look. “Might be more effective if you didn’t look like you were about to faceplant on the pavement, Doc.”

Any quip that Spencer might’ve given in return was cut off when a loud shout of warning echoed around them only seconds before pain exploded across the bond. The coffee cup in Spencer's hands hit the ground and he was up and moving before the shout had faded from the air. Exhausted limbs were filled with new energy. He darted around people and over obstacles quickly in his hurry to get over to Remy. The pain was still in their bond, a bright fire, and Spencer could only think of getting to him. He didn’t even notice as Matt scrambled after him or as the man caught his arm when he started to stumble over something. With Matt’s help, Spencer cleared the last big block in his path and came around it to find Remy sitting down on a pile of rocks. Rogue was behind him, pressing something down against Remy’s back.

Remy looked up as Spencer hurried forward and dropped down beside him. He quickly reached out and caught Spencer's hands in his, already pouring out reassurances. “It’s fine, cher. Gambit’s fine.”

“You’re bleeding.” Spencer said hoarsely, trying to lean around to look at the wound that Rogue was still applying pressure to.

The grip on his hands tightened and Remy pulled on him, forcing him to stay where he was. “Some of de rubble shifted and some cut ‘cross Gambit’s back, dat’s all. It aint not’ing y’ need to waste y’r energy on. Save it fo’ people dat need it. Gambit’s fine.”

“Be quiet and let me be the judge of that.” Spencer yanked his hands free and cast a quick glare at his partner. He shifted on his knees and moved to where he could look at the bloodied cloth that Rogue was holding in place. In his worry for his partner and tense from feeling Remy’s pain, his voice was a little more brisk than it usually was. He also didn’t waste time asking for what he needed. “Move your hands for a moment, Rogue, and let me see how bad the damage is.”

“He said he’s fine.” Rogue snapped at him, her lip curling up in her customary sneer she wore each time she looked at him. “Back off. We’ll get Beast over here to help him.”

Later on, Spencer's reaction to her snarky words would embarrass him just the slightest bit. In that moment, all he felt was anger. Someone was between him and his Guardian, his injured Guardian, and Spencer's whole body went taunt with his fury. No one else got a chance to step in and say anything. His eyes snapped with a fire none of them had seen there before as he glared at Rogue and attacked in the way that he knew how—with words. “I understand that you seem to have this asinine need to punish me because you’re so woefully insecure that you cannot stand even the sight of me touching him without your jealousy ripping you to shreds, but do not think for one single instant that I will allow your insecurities to cause him to come to any harm. Now—Move. Your. Hands.” And without hesitation, Spencer slapped his hand down over her gloved wrist and solved his problem by simply shoving her hand out of his way.

Her shock allowed him to move her. He knew he wouldn’t have been able to otherwise, not with her strength. He also knew that there was a good chance she would strike back once she recovered. That meant he only had an instant in which to act. With one look he took in the long, wide gash across Remy’s back, the blood pouring down from it, and he quickly laid his hand directly over it. He drew on both his energy and Remy’s, combining the two and bringing them to meet against the palm of his hand. In just the space of a breath, the wound underneath his hand rippled and drew together, and Remy arched underneath the touch with a small gasp of surprise. Spencer drew his hand back and where once there had been a wound there was now only smooth skin. All the pain he’d felt in the bond was now gone.

He only got a split second to be thankful before a hard shove sent him toppling down to the side. What had felt longer to him had been only long enough for one single breath, just enough time for Rogue to recover and react to his shove by returning it with a shove of her own. Only, with her strength and Spencer’s exhaustion, it sent him flying a few feet and right into another broken section of wall. “Keep your hands off me!” She snapped furiously at him.

Everyone around them reacted all at once, but no one reacted as quickly as Remy. The Cajun twisted in a move that would’ve impressed Spencer at a different time. He twisted and slammed his elbow straight into Rogue, knocking her back a good foot, and his body flowed around with the move until he ended up in a protective crouch between her and Spencer, a furious growl ripping from him. Spencer gathered what little energy he had left and quickly launched up from the ground, flinging himself right at Remy’s back and latching on. He wrapped his arms around Remy’s chest and neck, clutching him tightly and pulling him back. “Stop!” Just barely did he remember to not use Remy’s real name. “Gambit, no, don’t! This isn’t the place for this!”

“What the hell, swamp rat?” Rogue demanded, shoving up to her feet.

Remy snarled loudly at her. “Y’ keep y’r fuckin’ hands off him.”

The group around them had been made up of mostly people from here at the shelter, so none of them knew quite what to do with the two that now looked ready to start fighting any second now. One of the people rushed off to go get Cyclops, thinking that the leader could handle his people. The rest of them stayed out of the way as Rogue started to stalk forward, radiating her fury. “You can’t talk to me like that! You wanna yell at someone, yell at that little shit. He shoved me first!”

“Y’ touch him again and Gambit’s gonna do more dan swear at y’.” Remy warned her furiously.

This was getting fast out of hand. Spencer knew he had to get Remy under control. The Protector was out in full force at the moment, ready to do whatever he deemed necessary to protect his bondmate. Taking a deep breath, Spencer did the only thing he could think of. His twisted his body around Remy’s side, ducking underneath his arm and coming up right in front of Remy, right between his arms. It let him wrap his arms around Remy’s neck and put them face to face, nose to nose. In a low voice that wouldn’t carry to the others, he set about trying to use his words to soothe the man down. Hopefully it worked as well now as it had in the past. “Remy, listen to me. Look at me. There’s no threat here. She isn’t going to hurt me, not with everyone here like this.”

Scott suddenly broke through the group. “What’s going on here?” He marched right into the middle of things without an ounce of hesitation and put himself between the two in an obvious move meant to keep them apart. He looked furious. “What the hell do you two think you’re doing? This is not the place for this!”

“Tell that to the little shit there!” Rogue snapped furiously. She gestured with one hand to Spencer, who was still tightly twined around Remy. “Look at him! He’s practically trying to climb inside of him!”

Scott did exactly as Rogue suggested. He looked over at the bonded pair. Only, what he saw was something else entirely. He saw the absolute fury on Remy’s face and in his body and how he was holding Spencer close in a defensive posture. He saw Spencer stroking at Remy’s neck and face in those little soothing gestures that he’d seen him use before when trying to calm Remy down, just like that day in the Danger Room after Remy had attacked Logan for hurting Spencer. He saw all of that and added it to what he’d been told and he had a pretty good of what had happened over here. Now it was time to do damage control. “Rogue, get over to the other side and help Bishop. They’ve got a section over there they’re digging up where they think there might be someone underneath. It should be the last person to dig out of here, according to Wolverine. He hasn’t found anyone else.” When it looked like she would argue, he pointed a finger off that direction and snapped “Go!”

As soon as she flew away, everyone could see Remy visibly relax. His body lost its defensive pose and the snarl faded from his face. He turned his full attention to the man in front of him and Scott watched with bemusement as Remy started to run his hands over every bit of Spencer that he could reach. There was no doubt he was checking him over for injuries. Still, Scott couldn’t help but think it was a good thing that he’d sent Rogue away. This would really set her over the edge.

Crisis averted for the moment, though he knew he’d have to deal with it more later, Scott drew in a deep breath. “Gambit, Healer.” He raised his voice just enough for them to be able to hear him. When the two turned his way, he tried to put on his leader face. “Check each other over later. We’ve still got a few patients left over there that need immediate help and then we’re going to start loading everyone up. It’s about time to get out of here. Get back to work. And steer clear of Rogue for a while.”

Remy’s lip curled up at that, but he said nothing. Spencer, however, nodded seriously at him and started to unwind himself from Remy. “Yes, sir.”

For the first time Scott noticed the exhaustion that was lining Spencer's face. He looked a little closer and was startled by how tired the man looked. Maybe he wasn’t leaning into Remy simply to calm him down. He opened his mouth to say something, though he wasn’t sure what, but Spencer was already turning away and tugging Remy along with him, making his way back over towards the patients. Scott watched them go and made a mental note to check on them personally later on. Right now, what he’d said before was right. They had work to do.

CXCX

By the time the team finally made it back to the mansion, they were all filthy and exhausted. Their backup had arrived, called in by Charles to come and relieve them, and that left the team free to come home after hours of hard work and finally get some rest. The group that unloaded from the jet were a bedraggled lot. There were a few stumbles as the tired people made their way out, each one in search of a shower and then bed. Remy was looking forward to both of those, in that order. He was covered in dirt, blood, and other things he wasn’t even sure of and he felt like it had been days since he’d slept last. Yet his main concern was for the man beside him. Spencer had worked himself hard out there. He’d come close to completely draining himself more than once. The only thing that kept him going was his ability to draw on that ‘energy’ from other people. He drew some from Remy, which was part of why Remy was so tired, and he’d discovered out there that he could draw on energy for healing from people other than himself and the patient. That had truly helped him out quite a bit.

He’d discovered it accidentally when he was healing someone while Logan was watching him and he’d accidentally drawn on some of Logan’s energy. With exhaustion making his shields not as strong, and with as comfortable as he was with Logan, he hadn’t realized until it was too late that he was drawing some of Logan’s energy in and using it to replace his own. He’d apologized sincerely afterwards—to which Logan had told him to shut up and take what he needed.

It didn’t seem to work with everyone. Remy had a feeling it had only worked because Spencer trusted Logan. Whatever it was, it had helped Spencer to replace some of his own energy, giving him the strength to continue on.

But even with borrowed energy, everyone had their limits, and Spencer had reached his. He was so exhausted he was barely coherent when they loaded onto the jet. Now that they were here, Remy was trying to coax the man to rise up off the bench. Any other time and he would’ve just picked him up and carried him inside. However, right now he doubted he had the strength to carry him all the way there. For a bit, yes, but not all the way up to their rooms. “C’mon, cher. Need y’ to stand up. We just gotta get up to our rooms and den y’ can rest.” He coaxed him.

“Here, Gumbo.” Logan’s deep rumble interrupted. “Let me.”

Remy sighed tiredly and stepped back. He watched as Logan bent down and lifted the man up as easily as if he weighed nothing. Spencer's head lolled back for a moment before Remy helped to bring it up and tuck it against Logan’s shoulder. He picked up Spencer's limp arm and tucked that in as well, laying it over his waist. God, he looked like a rag doll. He barely even acknowledged it as they made their way through the house. Remy was grateful that no one tried to talk to them.

He had Logan carry Spencer not just to his room but in to his bathroom. There, Remy didn’t hesitate to start the shower and then strip himself down. He had no qualms about being naked in front of Logan. Once he was out of his clothes, he turned around and took the precious bundle from Logan’s arms. “I got him, _homme_. He’d hate it if he realized y’ was here when I stripped him.”

“Give a holler if you need anything.” Logan said sternly.

Remy nodded. “ _Oui_. An _merci_ , Logan. _Merci beaucoup_.”

Once he heard the bedroom door shut, Remy turned his attention to getting his bondmate out of his filthy clothes. It was a tricky experience. Spencer was more asleep than awake and he didn’t offer any help, though he also didn’t offer any resistance like Remy knew he would’ve if he was more alert. Funny to think that they’d stood in this very bathroom only hours ago and Spencer had been mortified at the idea of being even in just his boxers. Remy knew he’d hate this. He’d hate that Remy stripped him down and drew him into the shower. But, dammit, there was no way Spencer had the energy to wash himself and they couldn’t climb into bed with this all over them.

Remy didn’t bother trying to stand them up. He drew them down into the tub at the far end so the shower spray would hit directly on them. Sitting back, he drew Spencer's body between his legs so that his back was to Remy’s chest, head resting back on Remy’s shoulder. Remy sat there, arms hooked under Spencer’s armpits, holding him up across the chest with one arm while the other gently helped stroke away the blood that had dried on them.

He tried to keep his touch impersonal as he soaped them both up and cleaned their bodies. There was no way to avoid the intimacy of the moment. How could he when he had a lean, naked, _wet_ body pressed right up against his? Remy could only be thankful that he was too exhausted for his body to try and get any smart ideas. Still, it didn’t stop him from appreciating the view of all that smooth, pale skin just stretched out in front of him. Ruthlessly he tried to shove those thoughts away. Now was not the time for that!

Quickly and efficiently he scrubbed both their hair, getting the dirt out, and he let the shower gradually rinse it away. As Spencer just stayed lying against him, never once protesting the spray that kept washing over his face, Remy felt his worry grow a little. The only thing that kept it under control was that he could feel Spencer in the bond and everything there told him this was just exhaustion, pure and simple.

As soon as they were clean, he shut the water off and carefully laid Spencer down just briefly in the empty tub. There was no way he’d be able to lift them both out at once. He hurried to get himself wrapped up with a towel around his waist and then he brought another one over and he worked on drawing Spencer up out of the tub. “C’mon, _bébé_ , we’re almost done.” He encouraged him. He could feel Spencer trying to respond to his voice, so he kept up a low litany as he dried him off and drew him out towards the bedroom. “Dat’s it. We got y’ all dry. Now we’re gonna get y’ in some boxers and den we can lie down. I know dat’s what y’ want. Y’ want in dat nice, warm bed. Well, we’re almost dere. Here now, just lift y’r foot a lil bit, dat’s it, just like dat. Almost dere, cher. Almost dere.”

Finally, after a lot of effort on both their parts, the two were clothed in boxers and were finally over at the bed. Remy yanked the blankets back and practically poured Spencer into the bed. Arms free, he hurried over to lock and bolt the door and grab a deck of cards from his coat. He set the cards on the nightstand and then he finally, _finally_ , climbed into bed and curled his body around Spencer. He had just enough energy left in him to pull the blankets over them. Then, pulling Spencer in even closer, he gave one last sigh and surrendered to the need to sleep.


	19. Chapter 19

Remy woke long before Spencer did. It was the call of nature that woke him and that was the only thing that would’ve worked at the time to pull him up out of the warm comfort of the bed. When he was done, he would’ve been perfectly content to make his way back to bed and slip right back under the covers and back up against Spencer's warm body. In fact, that’s what he was going to do when his plan was interrupted by the loud sound of someone knocking. Automatically he froze and cocked his head, trying to listen to figure out where it came from. Was that Logan’s room?

The knocking sound came again. Wait a second, that knocking was coming from next door. That was _his_ room! Who was knocking at his door? There was no way that Remy could ignore his curiosity. He didn’t even think about it before he padded over to the door and unlocked it, silently slipping it open. Sticking his head out the door, Remy saw that it was Scott that was knocking on his door. For a second Remy debated and then he cleared his throat. The sound had Scott jumping, something that made Remy grin. His grin only grew when Scott spun towards him and glared. “ _Bonjour_ , Scotty.”

Scott glared for a moment longer before sighing. The lines on his face relaxed to an expression that Remy was quite familiar with—annoyance. “Ass.”

When all Remy did was grin even more, Scott gave the small head shake that Remy had learned was the man’s equivalent of rolling his eyes. Then he turned and made his way over towards Remy. “I should’ve figured you’d be over there instead of here.”

“ _Oui_.” Remy shifted, leaning his shoulder against the doorframe and crossing his arms over his chest. “Aint leavin’ him unguarded when he’s like dis.”

“How’s he doing?”

There was only honest concern in Scott’s question. Remy knew that the man honestly wanted to know. Scott could be one hell of a dick sometimes, and Remy was still convinced there was a stick up his ass that would need to be surgically removed one day, but he gave a damn about the people around him. Allowing a small sigh out, Remy slouched a little more against the doorframe. “He’s still gone. Dat took way too much from him and he’s got a lot of healing to do inside. He aint even moved since I got him in bed.”

That had Scott’s eyebrows going up. “At _all_? Do you need me to call Hank?”

“ _Non,_ Scotty. Don’t need to be doing dat. Sleep’s what he needs fo’ now.” Remy tipped his head and studied Scott for just a moment. The man was trustworthy; he’d proved that to Remy a few times over. He also treated Spencer well and that counted for a lot in Remy’s books. Decision made, the Cajun pushed off the doorframe and stepped out, pulling the door shut behind him. “Remy’s gotta get somet’ing from his room. Y’ stand by m’ door and keep watch while y’ talk?”

There was no need for him to explain what it was he wanted Scott to watch. It certainly wasn’t him. Scott agreed easily, another point in his favor. “Sure.”

This time it was Scott who propped a shoulder against the doorframe, though it was at the door to Remy’s room. He angled just enough that he could see in the room as well as out in the hallway. No one was going to get near Spencer's room without them knowing. Remy snorted to himself as he went in his room and straight over to his closet. He doubted anyone would get close anyways. His instincts around Spencer seemed to be getting stronger and stronger. Funny how that didn’t scare him as it would’ve a few weeks ago. It didn’t scare him at all, in fact. If anything, he felt a smug sort of satisfaction. Not sure what to make of that, he mentally shrugged and just ignored it. He started to sift through his closet for some clean clothes to put on later. “What was it y’ needed, Cyke?”

“Well, I wanted to check on you two, for one.”

“We’re fine, cher. Told y’, he just needs to sleep.” Turning, Remy tossed some pants over onto the bed as well as a few shirts. He might as well bring a few extras on over to Spencer's room. He spent often enough over there that it only made sense to keep extra clothes. The last thing they needed was someone to catch him coming out of Spencer's room in wrinkled clothes, or the clothes he wore the day before. There were already teasing remarks that went around about them. Those remarks had been made worse by Rogue’s arrival.

A flash of temper and pain shot through Remy like a jolt of lightning. That, too, he ignored. Later was time enough to think about that. _Much_ later.

“What about you?” Scott asked, interrupting Remy’s thoughts. “You looked pretty beat before, too. You still do, a bit.”

Done in his closet, Remy moved over to the dresser. Socks and underwear joined the small pile on his bed. With his usual casual disregard for his own care, he shrugged one shoulder negligently. “Meh. Remy just needs to eat. Was giving Spencer strength t’rough all dat so he could keep going. Remy didn’t give up as much as Spencer, _mais_ it was draining, still.”

“I don’t think any of us thought about what it would do to you.”

“Dat’s fine, Fearless. Remy’s fine. Y’ worry bout de important t’ings, not dis Cajun.”

“You are one of the important things, Remy.” Scott said, startling him. “But I’ll let it be. I imagine Spencer will care for you once he wakes. He seems to be just as protective of you as you are of him.”

And that neatly brought the conversation around to the other reason that Remy knew Scott was there for. Dammit, he’d really hoped to avoid this. He’d hoped that Scott would let it go for a little while. Didn’t look like that was going to happen. Remy resisted another sigh. He went over to his bed and stole one of his pillowcases. It would work as a perfect little sack to hold his clothes for the transfer next door. He didn’t say a word about Rogue. If Scott wanted to talk about this, it was up to him to start it.

He didn’t have long to wait. He’d only stuffed the pants into the pillowcase when Scott said, “I’m going to talk with her today. What happened was unacceptable.”

“Dis is between her and Remy, Cyke.”

“No, it’s not. Not entirely.” Scott argued. His tone firmed, turning to that tone he used when he was being the leader. It was a tone that made Remy want to kick him—hard. “She created trouble in the field and that makes it my business as well. Where it concerns your relationship, that’s your business, but this concerned all of us. You two have always kept your troubles out of the field before. While I understand that you were defending your partner, you should’ve remembered where you were and pulled back. There’s a time to fight and a time to retreat. That was a time to retreat.”

The truth of that had Remy tucking his face down and grimacing. He kept his back to Scott, not quite wanting to turn around and look at him yet. “Wasn’t t’inking dat clearly, Scotty. All Remy could see was dat she was a t’reat.”

“We need to get you two to a point where you can think rationally when your protective instincts are brought up, if at all possible. The last thing I need is another feral berserker on my hands.” Scott blew out a breath and his tone relaxed once more. “Come to my office later. I have something I want to think about, roll around in my head for a bit, and I’d like to discuss it with you two once you’re both up for it.”

 “ _Oui_ , Fearless.”

“Good. Now, before I get out of your hair, is there anything you two need? Anything I can do for you?”

Slinging his bag up and over his shoulder, Remy finally turned around. “Just some peace fo’ a bit. Maybe y’ send up someone wit’ a tray of food in a couple hours? Remy don’t wanna leave Spencer fo’ too long.”

“I’ll ask Ro to bring some food up. Spencer seems to handle her against his shields just fine.”

Remy was surprised that Scott had noticed that. It must’ve shown on his face a little because Scott’s expression turned amused and just slightly mocking. “What? I notice things. I’ve spent enough time around telepaths to notice when someone’s easy on their shields. I figure empathy’s the same way. Plus, that’s my job, Remy. I’m supposed to know my team.”

“Y’ consider him part of y’r team?” Remy asked.

“I may not have showed it so far, but, yeah, I do. He’s one of us now. God help him.” The last part he tacked on with a laugh.

The two headed back out into the hallway. Remy shut the door to his room and then made his way quickly back to Spencer's door. Even being apart for just these few moments had bothered him. With Spencer weak like this it just didn’t feel right to be apart from him. They paused outside the door and Remy gave Scott a small smile. “ _Merci_ fo’ checking up on us, _mon ami_.”

“Of course. You two take care of each other.”

The first thing Remy did was check the bed when he came in. Spencer hadn’t moved at all. He was well and truly out of it. If it hadn’t been for the bond letting Remy know that his bondmate was still alive and well, just healing, he might’ve taken Scott up on that offer to get Hank. Hell, he would’ve gone and gotten him himself already. As it was, he had a hard time not holding a mirror up to Spencer's lips to make sure he was still breathing. One thing that Remy had learned in their times sharing a bed was that Spencer didn’t sleep perfectly still even cuddling, and he always cuddled. He gravitated towards Remy like there were magnets pulling them together. He also made little snuffing sounds in his sleep sometimes, or grumbles when he was really stressed, and he even occasionally talked. For him to lay this still and quiet was just creepy.

Remy shook that sensation off and bolted the door shut. Then he made his way over to the dresser. He was surprised when he opened the drawer and found it empty. He went ahead and put his socks and underwear in there and then, because he could never resist his curiosity, he checked the other drawers. They were empty too. What the hell? He checked the closet next. Again—empty. Where on earth was Spencer's stuff? Where were his clothes at? The laundry basket had a few things in it. Two outfits, at most. Remy turned and went to where Spencer's bag sat beside the dresser. He didn’t hesitate to squat down and open it up. Inside, he found about two more full outfits, from the underwear out.

That set him back on his heels. Was this all Spencer had? Four outfits? Remy blinked his eyes a few times as if that would magically change what he saw. How had he not noticed this? Then again…the more he thought about it, the more he realized that he should’ve noticed this earlier. This had all started while Spencer and his team were on a case, meaning that Spencer had had only had his travel bag with him. Logic would say he’d only carry a few outfits in there. He hadn’t exactly had a chance to go back to his apartment since then to replenish those clothes. Or to get really anything.

He looked around the room and he couldn’t stop a wince from slipping out. There were no personal items in here. There were books, but they were medical books that Spencer had borrowed from Hank. There were no personal books, no photos, nothing on the walls, no special curtains, and the only special blanket on the bed was the quilt Remy had brought with him and never taken back out. Everything Spencer had was essentially in this small bag. The room itself could’ve belonged to anyone. All Spencer would have to do was grab his dirty clothes and stuff them in his bag and he’d be ready to go in an instant with no one ever knowing that he’d been here. Damn. They’d brought Spencer here and the man had basically given up his other life to be here, yet no one had done anything to help him make this his _home_. Not even Remy.

Guilt hit him and for a moment he found himself a little angry for that guilt. Why on earth should he feel guilty? He hadn’t asked for any of this either! Dammit, he’d given up a lot here, too. Why was this all about Spencer? It wasn’t like Remy had wanted this whole damn thing to come in and take over his life! He was losing things, too. Look at his relationship with Rogue! None of that shit would be happening if it wasn’t for this damn bond. Remy glared down at Spencer's travel bag. Why had his whole life been rearranged around this one person? How fair was that? Everything in him was tuned to Spencer. Spencer's care and wellbeing came first and foremost, above anyone else’s. This bond had changed Remy, hardwiring him to take care of Spencer in every way possible. How fair was that? He hadn’t asked for this!

The anger only lasted a breath. Then Remy felt it drain from him. Spencer hadn’t asked for this, either. Being mad at him wasn’t going to make this any better or any easier to deal with. It would only make life more difficult for the both of them. They were in this together, he and Spencer. If they started fighting with each other about this, they’d really be doomed. And if he were honest with himself, he had to admit that Spencer tried to look after him in his own way as well. More than anyone else did, that was for sure. Others may not realize that Remy was having troubles with this or anything else, but Spencer did. He just didn’t advertise his caretaking the way that Remy did. His was quieter and more subtle.

Remy braced his hands on his knees and pushed up. He made his way over to the bed and took just a moment to look down at the man sleeping there. For what he was surprised to realize was the first time, he let himself just _look_ at Spencer. Look at him without worrying about embarrassing Spencer, or revealing too much, or spurring any rumors. There was no one here to see him and Spencer was so out of it there was no way he’d notice anything Remy felt. He was free to just…look.

Spencer was lying on his side, mostly buried under covers. He’d been curled up against Remy’s chest before and he’d stayed in position when Remy had slid away, so one arm was draped over empty bedding and one leg was drawn up a bit. That shaggy brown hair of his had dried curly and was lying messily around his head. Remy reached out and used one finger to slip some of that hair back behind an ear so he could be free to look right at his face. A handsome face it was, too. Spencer really was a beautiful man. Oh, not in the traditional sense of the word. There were probably people who wouldn’t think to apply that word to him. Awkward, yes. Gangly. He was all long limbs and not much grace to go with them, especially when he got to thinking. Then all coordination seemed to just fade away. But still, he _was_ beautiful. High cheekbones, great facial structure. That slightly plump bottom lip that just sort of begged to be nibbled. Eyes that were beautiful and expressive when open and which gave him a different kind of beauty while sleeping like this, accented by long lashes that any lady would be envious of.

And that was just his face. The rest of him was beautiful too. Remy had seen glimpses often enough now and he’d seen a whole hell of a lot earlier. Spencer was pale skin from head to toe. Only a few scars and not much hair had broken the smoothness of it. He was far too thin, with too many ribs visible, but that was something that Remy could work on with him. Spencer had made an offhand comment before that he often forgot to eat while working. That and recent stress probably accounted for the extreme slenderness. A little while of steady meals and he’d fill out. Though, he’d still be slender. That was just his build.

Yes, all in all, he was a beautiful man. It was just too bad he didn’t see it.

Remy gave him one last sweep with his eyes, taking him in, and he didn’t realize the soft smile that he wore as he turned away and grabbed his laptop. A moment later he was slipping easily back into bed. Instead of lying side by side Spencer, he propped himself up against the head of the bed, though he did scoot close enough that Spencer was free to cuddle with his hip. When Spencer actually did, just barely lifting his arm and snuggling in, Remy took that as a positive sign. It meant a bit of life was returning. The sooner Spencer stopped sleeping the sleep of the dead, the better it would be for them.

Until Spencer woke, Remy would sit here and stand guard, keeping him safe. To keep himself entertained, he opened up his laptop and went to his email. It had been a while since he’d written his Papa. It was time to write him and tell him everything that had been going on lately. Who knew? Maybe Jean-Luc had heard something before about something like this bond. The man had a wide wealth of knowledge. Still smiling, Remy settled the laptop on a pillow that was half on his lap and safely away from Spencer's head, and he began to type.

CXCX

After he left Remy, Scott headed down towards his office, mulling over what he was about to do. Bobby stepped out of the kitchen, catching his eye. “Hey, Bobby,” Scott called out, drawing his friend’s attention. “Could you go and fetch Rogue for me? Tell her I’m waiting to speak with her in my office." 

Bobby's eyes widened slightly at Scott's serious tone. He’d been on the receiving end of an angry or annoyed Scott often enough to recognize the signs. “Sure, Scott, no problem.” He took off down the hall, thinking to himself that Rogue was really in for it, judging by the look on Scott’s face.

Scott entered his office, and sat down heavily in his chair. He could already feel the start of a headache pulsing in his temples, all it took was thinking about the tantrum he was most likely about to witness. This wasn’t going to be pleasant. Scott could already feel the start of a headache pulsing in his temples. All it took was thinking about the tantrum he was most likely about to witness. Nothing he had to say to Rogue was going to go over well and if he let her, she’d probably rant and rave for hours. He had to make sure that didn’t happen. To prevent it, he didn’t plan on letting her say a whole lot of anything. Too many times he’d had to listen to the ‘poor me’ speeches she was known to give when she was fighting with Remy. Even if half the stuff she said about Remy was true, Scott had long since lost any sympathy for her. She’s the one who kept going back to him over and over.

The sound of a knock at his door broke his thoughts. _Time to get this over with_. “Come in!”

The hesitant way that Rogue walked into Scott’s office said clearly that she knew she was in trouble. Knew, and definitely wasn’t looking forward to this. “You wanted to see me?”

“Yes. Come on in and sit down, Rogue.”

He sat back in his chair and watched as she slowly made her way over to the chairs in front of his desk. Scott gave her just enough time to get settled before he got started. Better to get this going and get it done with. He _hated_ this part of the job sometimes. “You know what I’ve asked you in here for, Rogue. I want your account of what happened out there in as short of terms as possible. Start right after Remy got hurt.”

Just as he’d known would happen, she went on the instant defensive, her body tensing up, and her expression looking both upset and angry all at the same time. “I don’t know what that little shit told you, but I didn’t do anything wrong!” she spat out.

“Stop right there.” Scott’s voice was hard and sharp and startled her into silence. “For the record, _Spencer_ hasn’t told me anything as he’s still unconscious after all the energy he expended helping those people. I haven’t spoken with him yet about what happened, though I will once he’s awake.” He straightened his shoulders and hardened his expression just a bit. “I’m asking you what happened, Rogue, and I want an answer without the snide insults. Now, tell me what happened and only what happened.”

Something in his tone or on his face must’ve told her just how serious he was. She didn’t argue with him, didn’t try anything else. She just stiffened a little in her seat and her voice when she spoke was tightly controlled. “After the Cajun got hurt, I did what I was supposed to. I got him sitting down on that pile of rocks and I moved his coat so I could take a look at things. When I saw how bad his back was bleeding, I put pressure on it. We were just sitting there when Spencer came tearing over like a bat out of hell. Rem caught him and told him not to heal him, that he was fine, and that little…he basically told Rem to shut up and he came back and demanded I move. When I didn’t, he shoved me out of the way. So I shoved him back.”

Scott held up a hand before her story could get any further. He held tightly to his temper to try and keep it from his voice. “Why didn’t you move when he asked you?”

“Rem didn’t want him healin’ him! He said no. I wasn’t letting anyone use their powers on him when he’d said no. The Professor always taught us that was wrong.”

“And what possessed you to push him so hard that you sent him flying a few feet?”

“I, I didn’t mean to send him that far.” Now the anger was pushed down and she put on her best innocent, apologetic look. It might’ve worked if he hadn’t seen it put into use countless times. “I was just mad, Scott. I didn’t mean to hurt him.”

Now came the moment that he knew wasn’t going to go well. The easiest part was out of the way. What came next was the part that would have the greatest potential for a tantrum. Scott resisted the urge to reach up and pinch at the bridge of his nose. “Rogue,” He began slowly, calling on all the patience he possessed. “I’m only going to go through this once and I want no interruptions while I do. The Professor and I have already talked about what happened and it’s clear to the both of us that this was more than just a simple misunderstanding. Your animosity towards Spencer has been evident from the minute you met him. All of us know it and, honestly, we’ve all applauded Spencer's restraint in that area. Especially considering that he’s an empath. We would’ve all understood if he’d blown up at you before now.”

“What…!”

“I said I want no interruptions.” Scott cut her off sharply. He sat up straighter in his chair and rested his arms on his desk so that he could lean forward just a bit, knowing that it gave him a slightly imposing look. He wanted his words to sink in with her. “We’ve all stayed out of this because your relationship wasn’t our business. But when you bring your relationship troubles out into the field, it _does_ make it my business. I’ve heard accounts from others about what happened there and now I’ve heard your story. Yes, everyone has agreed that Remy said no. But you and I both know that no one would be able to do anything to Remy that he didn’t want done. What was between them was between them and you shouldn’t have taken it upon yourself to interfere. You were warned from multiple parties about how to be careful around those two.”

Once more Rogue tried to interject a word in. “So I…”

Scott cut her off with a sharp “Be quiet!” The stunned look on her face was rather pleasing. He took a bit of petty pleasure from it and then pushed that down and focused back on the task at hand. “You were warned not to get between the two of them and you were most definitely warned to be careful about how you treat Spencer. There is a primal part of Remy that seems almost as feral as the Wolverine and all it takes is the hint of a threat towards Spencer for it to come out. You were warned of that and you chose to ignore it in your little vendetta against the man you’re so positive is trying to take your boyfriend from you.”

Rogue sat up straighter at that, her eyes glaring hotly at Scott as she visibly struggled to keep her retort to herself.

He ignored it completely and kept going. “Because of that, you created trouble and caused a scene in the middle of a rescue effort, the absolute last place for your romantic drama. You risked hurting Remy’s bondmate, something that’s dangerous on its own, and you risked harming the only person we had there who has a mutation that actually allows them to heal. If you’d harmed him and he hadn’t been able to heal people, every life that he could’ve saved and wouldn’t have, those would’ve been on your head. They would’ve been your fault the same as if you put a gun to them and pulled the trigger. Did you even stop to think about that?”

She paled and winced ever so slightly. The shamefaced look she wore told him that she hadn’t before, but she was now. To his surprise, she stayed quiet, her head bowing down just a little. Good. That meant his words were sinking in. He didn’t like playing the bad guy here. He didn’t like coming off as an asshole. But he would take care of his people— _all_ his people. He wouldn’t sacrifice them for the sensibilities of one.

“Your actions were rash and impulsive. They were the actions of a child, not an adult.” Taking a deep breath, Scott prepared to drop the next bit. “Because of that, your punishment is going to be like what we’d give a child. I spoke with the Professor and he believes that some restrictions might teach you control and that extra work around the house might help you work out your temper. When you’re done with me, you’re to go see him to find out your exact punishment. If it were up to me, you wouldn’t be getting off so easy.”

She looked up, wide eyed and stunned. “Easy? Scott…”

“I don’t want to hear it, Rogue. You were warned by quite a few of us to be careful with Spencer and Remy. Now, the Professor is waiting for you. I suggest you get down there. And, Rogue? Let me make myself absolutely clear on this. If something like this happens again, you’ll be spending time at Emma’s once more until she and the Professor decide that you’re responsible enough to return here. You have my word on that. I won’t allow your pettiness and jealousy to cause any more damage. Get your act together or you’re going to have no one to blame but yourself for what happens.”

He wasn’t surprised at all that the chair knocked over from how hard she stood up. Mentally, he gave her kudos for keeping her tantrum to only that. There was no swearing, no anger, no breaking things. Maybe the Professor had been right in their talk earlier. Maybe a part of her did recognize that what she’d done was stupid. It would explain why she took the dressing down so well. He watched her leave the room and couldn’t help but heave a sigh of relief when the door shut behind her. Oh thank God. That was one more unpleasant thing he could mark off his checklist.

When had he become so cynical in his dealings with the people here? He’d read manipulation in Rogue through that entire conversation. Once, he would’ve at least given her the benefit of the doubt. He would’ve asked her _why_ she’d acted the way she had and he would’ve tried to help, somehow. Today he’d just wanted nothing more than to pass off her and her problems to Charles to let him deal with it. Since when had he stopped caring so much for his team?

 _//You still care, Scott//_ Jean’s mind voice slid in easily and effortlessly. He didn’t even jump at it, too used to her presence. He’d known she’d end up keeping an eye on his conversation with Rogue. _//It’s not that you don’t care anymore. It’s just that you know the people here well enough to know when you’re being played. That’s a good thing. You still care about Rogue. If you didn’t, you would’ve sent her away already, or you would’ve just let the Professor deal with the whole thing. With the people here, it’s just like parenting. Lecturing doesn’t mean you don’t care. If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t lecture//_

Scott’s lips quirked up and he shook his head. _//Try convincing them of that//_

_//They just don’t know you the way I do//_

_//I should hope not. Might be a little weird, you know?//_

She gave a light mental laugh before drawing back and giving him his privacy once more. Or, as much privacy as he ever had with a telepath linked to him. Still, she’d done exactly what he knew she’d set out to do. She’d relaxed him. With his tension mostly gone, he moved on to the next item on his mental checklist. He picked up his phone and dialed the number he’d been calling one to two times a week since Spencer's arrival. It only took two rings before a familiar voice answered. _“Hotchner.”_

“Hey there, Aaron.” Scott sat back in his chair once more and let himself get comfortable. This conversation could end up taking a little bit. There was a lot he had to tell Aaron this week. The two had known one another for enough years that there was a comfort there that neither man showed with many people. Their friendship was an easy one, both relaxed and comfortable. They were alike in a lot of ways, he and Aaron, and sometimes there was nothing better than talking to someone who understood you and understood what you went through as being a leader of a group. He’d always found that kind of understanding in Aaron.

_“Hey, Scott. I’ve been wondering when I’d hear from you. How are things going out there?”_

“Oh, they’re going. We’ve been a bit busy around here.”

_“Has something happened? Is Reid okay?”_

That was a bit of a tricky question. The last thing he wanted was to worry Aaron. But there were some things that Scott wanted to ask and things that he needed to know. To do that, he was going to have to be honest here and tell Aaron some of what was going on. “Spencer's fine, Aaron. Exhausted, but fine. We went out as a group to provide some relief effort for a shelter that had been bombed. His healing got put to the test a bit there and he just used a little too much energy. He’s fine, though. Remy assures us that all he needs is to sleep and he’ll be okay.” That was a very condensed version of things. Still, Aaron would understand that there were details Scott couldn’t give him.

A low sigh echoed over the line. “ _Knowing Reid, he probably pushed himself more than just a little. But you’re sure he’s okay?”_

“Remy’s sure. I don’t think there’s any better judge.”

_“Good. Reid trusts him and that says a lot about him. He cares easily, but trust is hard won with him. We could all see how much trust was there when we were in Vegas. Speaking of – how was he when he came home? We were worried about him.”_

Thank you, Aaron. The man had just unknowingly brought the conversation to one point that Scott had wanted to bring up. “That’s actually one of the things I wanted to call you about. Apparently when they got done saying goodbye to you, Spencer and Remy went to visit Spencer's mother.”

Scott didn’t get a chance to finish that. He heard Aaron make a surprised sound and he cut himself off. A second later, Aaron said “ _He took Remy to see his mother_?”

“Yes. Is that a big deal?” Scott asked. The line went quiet and Scott laid his head back and closed his eyes, his attention fully turned to the phone now. There was something important here, he was sure. “Is there something I need to know, Aaron? If there’s anything important, I need you to tell me. Spencer overloaded while he was visiting with her, badly enough that Remy actually had to shield him for a while and he was, from my understanding, almost catatonic.”

That drew another sigh from Aaron. “ _You don’t ask easy questions, Scott. I wouldn’t normally say anything, but if you’re going to be looking out for him, you need to know what to expect. It’s not a huge secret, either. If you ran a background check on him, the information would show there_.”

Boy, this was just sounding better and better. “I can do that if it would save your conscience, Aaron.”

“ _No, no_.” Still, Aaron gave a long pause. When he came back, his voice was just a bit tighter, the only sign of his discomfort. “ _Reid’s mother is in a mental institution. She suffers from paranoid schizophrenia. I know that going to see her often leaves Reid ill for a while. If she’s having a bad day, her erratic emotions are hard on him and he can’t seem to shut them out as well. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t try as hard, or maybe it’s because she’s his mother. Add in the other emotions from a mental hospital and you can understand why being there usually affects him in some way_.”

Well, hell. That hadn’t been what Scott had been expecting to hear at all. He blinked his eyes open and stared up at the ceiling. “Damn.”

“ _If he overloaded, I’d guess that she either had a bad day, or he was a little too open and picked up too much around him. That’s always a danger for him if he’s not careful.”_

“How on earth did he ever manage to work at the BAU?” Scott asked, voicing a question he’d wondered for a while. It was also one that led into the other part of things he’d wanted to talk to Aaron about. “How did you guys cope with his empathy out in the field?”

The line went quiet for a just a moment. Scott could picture Aaron sitting back in his seat as well, that distant look on his face as he tried to organize his thoughts. Eventually he started to speak again, his words a little slow at first as he tried to form his thoughts out loud. “ _Reid’s stronger than he looks like. A lot of people underestimate that fact when they look at him. I honestly think he could’ve coped without our assistance in the field if he absolutely had to. He’s developed his own coping mechanisms over the years. But we developed some too. I’ve never tried to stop and put them into words, though. A lot of them – we don’t think about it. They’re just things we do._ ”

“Any tips or tricks you can offer would be greatly appreciated, Aaron. I’m responsible for him here and I’ll openly admit I know nothing about how to deal with empathy. We’re flying blind here.”

“ _A lot if it you’ll pick up just through observation. We all watched him long enough that we learned the warning signs. There are little things that you’ll see him do that’ll let you know his shields are low. He’ll lean away from people or keep a step back from the group. He might gravitate towards one person or another. With you guys, it’ll probably be Remy, from what I would guess. He seems to unconsciously pick someone that’s easy on him to be around when he feels stressed. Also, he’ll get a headache. That’s another sign his shields are low. You’ll see it in the lines around his eyes or that line that gets between his eyebrows. He’ll talk less, too. When he doesn’t ramble at you over something, you know there’s something wrong with him.”_

Scott smiled a little at that one. “He does like to talk sometimes, doesn’t he?”

“ _He does.”_

“So if he starts having problems out in the field, how did you guys cope with it?”

_“Sometimes it was as easy as sending him out with Morgan. Morgan was a good buffer for him because they’re close and Reid finds him soothing. So I’d send them out to view one of the dump sites or abduction sites, somewhere with few people, and that little bit of time away with Morgan would help him reset his shields. By the time they came back, he could be okay again. Or I’d tell him to go take a quick break, even just ten minutes sometimes, and he’d do what he jokingly called a ‘power meditation’ and he’d push some of the negative out and strengthen himself.”_

“Is there any way to prevent those bad moments from happening?”

 _“No._ ” Aaron said bluntly. “ _You can lessen the likelihood of them happening but you can’t stop them. Pair him with people he trusts, people who he gets along with, and you’ll make it easier. But if you plan on sending him out into the type of situations I know you and your people get involved in, you have to understand and be prepared for the fact that it’s going to get to him in some form or another. Unless it’s really bad, it won’t keep him from doing his job, but it will get to him.”_

Sighing, Scott finally gave in and kept his eyes closed, pushing his glasses up so he could rub at the bridge of his nose and over his eyes to try and combat his growing headache. “I don’t know if I’ll send him out. That’s what I’m trying to figure out. I don’t want to lose Remy on our team but the only way I can send him out is to send Spencer with him and I just don’t know about that. Between the troubles with his empathy and his lack of fighting ability, I’m worried about what would happen.”

“ _I know Reid's not a fighter, but from the sounds of it, he doesn't really have to be. From what I've been told and what I saw between them, they seem almost like two parts to the whole. Where Remy is physical, Reid is verbal. Combined, they could be a pretty unstoppable force in the right circumstances. They just need trained on how to work together. Don’t make the same mistake as everyone else, Scott. Don’t treat Reid as weaker than he is. He’s been shot at, kidnapped, drugged, beaten down countless times, and he keeps getting back up. Not only that, but he still manages to do his job on top of it. I’ve seen him go into situations that seemed impossible and somehow he still manages to come out of them. He’s survived through things most people never could. He’s strong._ ”

“Okay, okay.” Blowing out a breath, Scott let his glasses drop back into place. He settled them in and then ran a quick hand through his hair. “Thanks, Aaron. You answered quite a few of my questions and helped me figure a few things out. I appreciate it.”

“ _Of course._ ”

“I’ve got some more things I need to finish thinking about. I’ll give you a call again in a few days to let you know how everything goes.”

The two wrapped up their conversation quickly after that and Scott was soon sitting quietly at his desk once more. With no one in his office to see him, he reclined back in his chair and kicked his feet up onto the desk. Then he folded his hands behind his head and stared up at the ceiling. He had a lot to think about.

CXCX

For the past few hours Spencer had finally started to come out of that dead, dead sleep and was sleeping more naturally. He was actually moving around, making those little noises of his, and Remy had never been so happy to hear someone make noise while they slept. There was a growing warmth in their bond, too, that told him that Spencer was drawing towards wakefulness. That was actually what alerted him first as Spencer finally did start to wake. The shift in emotions warned him and Remy turned his eyes away from the laptop to look down towards his lap. His lips curved in both fondness and amusement. Spencer had really latched on in the last hour. One of his arms was squished between them, fingers curled into the leg of the pajama pants Remy had pulled on earlier. His other arm had been tossed across Remy and that hand was partially tucked under Remy’s back. Spencer was on his side, his upper half curled over Remy so that his head ended up pillowed on Remy’s abdomen, and his leg was tossed over Remy’s with his knee drawn up just a bit. He was basically holding on to Remy like some giant teddy bear.

The blankets had been drawn up by Spencer so that just the top of his head was sticking out. That head shifted a little now and Remy battled back a laugh as one brown eye squinted up at him.

“Welcome back to de world of de livin’, cher.” Remy said warmly.

Much to his amusement, Spencer shook his head and tucked his face back down.

Laughing, Remy closed his laptop and set it down off to the side. Then he turned his full attention to the man trying to hide underneath the blankets. “What, y’ t’ink y’r jus’ gonna keep sleepin?”

He felt more than saw the nod. A burst of sleepiness and contentment was sent over the bond, basically Spencer's way of telling him he felt too good to move or wake up.

“Lazy bones. Y’ already been out fo’…” Remy twisted his head and checked the clock. “…sixteen hours so far.” That didn’t seem to bother Spencer out at all. Humor growing, Remy slipped his hand under the edge of the blanket, fingers going to Spencer's hair as they often did. “Y’ need to wake up and eat somet’ing, at least. M’ Stormy brought us up some breakfast a few hours ago.” That earned him a low grumble. Remy didn’t question how he easily understood what Spencer meant. “ _Oui, oui_ , de petit sends up healthy food, I know. Don’t y’ worry, t’ough. Logan’s got y’r back. Stormy said dat Logan stopped her on her way out an he tossed on a pack of Pop Tarts fo’ y’. He said he knows how y’ are about y’r junk food.”

That sparked a bit of interest. Not enough to get him moving, though. But Remy knew something that would, at least a little. He bent a bit to the side so that he could reach off the edge of the bed, planning on going for the thermos down on the floor, but he should’ve known better than to try moving away at all. Spencer's arm tightened over him and he made a sound that was part grumble, part whine. Remy couldn’t help but laugh. He snagged the thermos and drew it up while he pet at Spencer's hair with his other hand. “Aint goin’ nowhere, me. Just grabbing de coffee thermos. Y’ want some coffee, don’t y’?”  He set the thermos on the nightstand right beside the bed.

He hadn’t expected a real answer, so he was surprised when Spencer mumbled “Do I have to get up?”

“Y’ can’t exactly drink coffee lyin’ down.”

“I can drink it lying on my side, flat on my back, or even…” Spencer paused long enough to yawn. “…hanging upside down. I attended college, where I was always working on more than one degree at a time. During finals week, I drank coffee any way I could get it.”

“In’eresting as all dat is, we aint testin’ out y’r skills over m’lap. I don’t wanna find out de hard way dat y’ lost some of dat ability since den.”

Spencer shook just slightly and it took Remy a second to realize the man was chuckling. In retaliation, he tugged on one of Spencer's curls. Immediately Spencer moved the hand that had been lying between them and used it to swat at Remy’s hand. He yanked the blanket up and ducked his head down a little more. Remy didn’t think before he chuckled and teased “Y’know, while  y’r down dere…”

He regretted the words almost instantly. Spencer was so damned shy, especially about even casual teasing or flirting. But he got the surprise of his life when Spencer didn’t grow embarrassed or shocked. Instead, the man retaliated by drawing his hand out from behind Remy’s back and bringing it down towards his hips and then…startled laughter escaped from Remy as the man started to tickle him. He tried to squirm away but the blankets and half of Spencer had his lower half pinned to the bed. He couldn’t escape those questing hands as they tickled across his hips and stomach, teasing over his sides. Remy’s laughter echoed around the room. Finally he twisted just right that he could kick the blankets off. That allowed him to have enough room to slide his body down and flip them over at the same time so that he was over Spencer, grinning down at him. “So dat’s how y’ want it, huh?” He let out an evil laugh and brought his own hands down to Spencer's sides.

For a few minutes the room was filled with laughter while the two rolled around the bed tickling one another and each trying to pin the other. Eventually they both dropped away, panting and laughing. “Truce.” Spencer called out breathlessly, beaming broadly. “Truce.”

Remy rolled onto his side and propped his head up on his hand. He was still grinning as well. “Truce.” He agreed. He stayed as he was for a moment and just enjoyed watching the man in front of him. Spencer's face was flushed and his smile was happy and just a bit smug. His eyes were open now and alert, still sparkling with his laughter, and his hair was a mess around his head. All in all, he looked thoroughly debauched. Naturally, Remy had to point that out. “Y’ look like y’ just had de ride of y’r life.”

Spencer flushed even hotter, just as Remy had known he would, but he gave Remy yet another surprise by blowing out a breath and grumbling “I wish. It’s been too long.” No sooner had the words come out of his mouth than Spencer's eyes popped wide and a very distinct ‘oh shit’ look crossed his face. He groaned loudly and covered his face as Remy started to laugh. “Oh, man, that wasn’t fair!” Spencer exclaimed, voice muffled behind his hands. “I haven’t had coffee yet. Nothing I say can be held against me.”

“Y’ aint getting coffee if dis is what happens to y’.” Remy said delightedly. “Y’r awfully spunky dis morning.”

“The filter between my brain and mouth is powered by coffee.”

“So dis is Spencer unfiltered, is it? I kinda like it.”

“You would.” Spencer peeked out from behind his hands and Remy caught a glimpse of laughing brown eyes and still flushed cheeks. “Take pity on me, Remy. Coffee, please? Please?”

“How de hell am I supposed to resist dat?” Remy mock grumbled. He pushed up from the bed and slipped back over to the side by the nightstand. He grabbed the coffee thermos and opened it up to pour the first cup into the lid.

As he did that, Spencer sat up in the middle of the bed, crossing his legs and beaming happily at him. “You’re not.”

Remy handed him the cup and rolled his eyes. “Imp.”

“Brat.” Spencer shot right back.

Now that Spencer had his coffee, Remy got up and went to the dresser to snag the tray that he’d set there earlier when Ororo had stopped by and dropped it off. He brought it over now and set it on the bed before climbing back in himself and once more propping himself up against the headboard. Spencer seemed to have woken up in one hell of a mood and Remy planned on enjoying every moment of it. There was something different about him, something more open both in their bond and in the way he was acting. It was a puzzle and Remy loved puzzles. Still, he took a second to give Spencer a quick once-over, checking him out to try and make sure he really was okay.

He wasn’t as subtle about it as he thought he was. Spencer took another drink of his coffee and then looked up at Remy through his bangs. His look still carried the same good humor to it that he’d been showing since he woke up. “Do I pass?”

“Hm?” Remy looked up from where he’d been noting a bruise on Spencer's thigh that he hadn’t seen before.

Spencer smiled at him. “I asked if I pass. You _were_ checking me over, weren’t you?”

 _Busted_. “ _Désolé,_ Spencer. Y’ just, y’ had me worried. Y’ knocked out hard after everyt’ing.”

“I know. I used too much energy and my body needed desperately to replenish it.” Spencer set his cup down on the tray and he reached for the package of Pop Tarts. His head dropped a little and some of his hair came down to shelter his face. A deliberate move, Remy knew. One he’d used himself countless times. It kept him from really being able to see Spencer's face. He could feel his emotions, though, and they were a mixture of embarrassment, discomfort, affection, appreciation, and other things that Remy couldn’t quite label. When Spencer spoke again, his voice was softer and almost hesitant. “I don’t really remember much after we got back on the jet. However, seeing as how we’re both sitting here in boxers and I don’t smell of blood and dirt, I can imagine what happened. I’m so sorry I was so out of it that I left you to take care of me – again.”

Remy knew that telling Spencer it was okay wouldn’t really make him feel any better. Instead, he simply said “Dat’s what partners are fo’.”

“Not in my experience.”

“Den y’ aint had very good partners in de past, _mon ami_.”

“No, I haven’t.” came Spencer's surprisingly candid response. “I’m rather used to doing everything on my own, actually, and relying on no one. It’s a strange sensation to know I can rely on someone else.”

For a moment Remy could only stare at him. He had never, _never_ , heard Spencer talk this openly. A part of him wanted to take advantage of that and ask the man some questions he’d been wondering about for a while now. The rest of him knew that he couldn’t. If this was just something caused by how low he’d burned, maybe by his walls resetting or some such thing, then Spencer would be mortified later to discover that he’d blurted out so much. Remy just couldn’t take advantage of that. He watched for a moment as Spencer finally opened up his breakfast treat and broke off the corner to start eating off the edges first, just as he always did. Then he blew out a breath and said “At de risk of ruining dis, I gotta say, I aint never seen y’ be so open, cher.”

Spencer stunned him even more by actually looking up and smiling at that. “Remy, since I’ve come here you’ve been witness to me at some of my lowest moments. Not just seen me, but taken care of me. You’ve slept in my bed with me, usually with me plastering myself up against you—and I know it’s me that does it, not you—and you’ve never once taken advantage of it. You went with me to see my mother and you cared for me afterwards when I was so overloaded I was almost catatonic. This is just the latest in a series of moments where you’ve been there to catch me and care for me when I hit a very low point. Not once have you taken advantage of it. You’ve given me no reason to believe you’d ever abuse any trust I place in you. After what we just went through, how could I doubt that? So yes, I’m being open with you. Why wouldn’t I be? You’re someone who, for better or worse, I’m going to be spending the rest of my life connected to. More importantly, I trust you.”

All Remy could do was sit there and stare at him. To say he was stunned was an understatement. The enormity of what Spencer was giving him here was not lost on him. Spencer was basically telling Remy that he trusted him—mind, body, and soul. That was both awe-inspiring and terrifying all at the same time. No one had ever trusted him that much. _No one_. Even when people said they trusted, they still held something of themselves back. Yet as Remy looked at Spencer's open expression, as he felt the brightness of their connection inside of him, he knew that Spencer _wasn’t_ holding back. He was risking everything and opening himself up wide, and he was doing it like it was the most natural thing in the world. Jesus. _Jesus_! What on earth was he supposed to say here? What did he do with such trust? He didn’t know if he could handle it. Hell, he didn’t know if he was worthy of that. When had he ever proved himself worthy of that kind of trust? People around him tended to get hurt.

A gentle hand settled over top of his, giving a small squeeze. “It’s okay, Remy.” Spencer said ever so gently. His eyes were full of kindness and understanding as they caught Remy’s and held them. “It’s okay. I know you don’t trust yourself. I can feel that. But I trust you. For now, let that be enough for the both of us. Do you trust me, at least a little?”

“I trust y’, Spencer. Dat aint been de issue.”

“Then trust in me now. It’ll be okay. We’ll be okay.” With one last squeeze and a smile, Spencer let go of Remy’s hand and reached back for his cup. He took a drink and then smiled and held it out. “May I have some more, please?”

What else could he do? Remy wrapped those words up deep inside his heart where they warmed a place he hadn’t even realized was cold. Then, with a smile, he poured the man some more coffee.


	20. Chapter 20

The two men shared a quiet and relaxing breakfast together. For that bit of time they were more than happy just to be awake and in one another’s company. The calming sensation they felt from being together kept either one of them from slipping too much into thought about what they’d seen and what they’d been through, which was a very good thing indeed. Spencer knew himself and his memory well and he knew it wouldn’t take much thought for those memories to come up and push away everything else. If that happened, he knew he’d get caught up in the emotions from those memories and some of the repairs his long sleep had done would be lost.

They kept their conversation light and easy up until the food was done and it came time to get ready to go find out what it was that Scott wanted. Reality intruded on them, then. They were going to have to leave the safety of their little room here. Once they were out there, people were going to want to talk to them, ask questions. Scott was out there waiting somewhere with whatever it was he wanted to talk to them about. The Professor probably wanted to talk to them, too, about what had happened. Then there was Rogue that still needed to be dealt with. Neither Spencer nor Remy was looking forward to that conversation.

Remy stared down at the now cleared breakfast tray and he let out a gusty sigh. “How bad is it dat I don’t wanna go out dere?"

“Neither do I.” Spencer looked over towards the door and grimaced. “Everyone’s going to want to talk to us about this and analyze it. Hank will probably want me to submit to a physical and some tests before he’ll decide that I’m healthy.”

Reaching over, Remy patted Spencer's knee. “I won’t let him poke y’ too much, cher.”

“I may hold you to that. I’m not in the mood to become a test subject.”

For a moment longer they sat there together. Then Spencer heaved a great sigh and pushed himself up off the bed. “We might as well get this done with. We can’t hide out in here forever.” He stepped down out of bed and there was a moment in which his legs wobbled and he had to grip at the bedpost to hold himself upright. He waved away Remy’s helping hand, though, getting his feet steady under him on his own. “I’m fine, I’m fine. I just spent too long in bed. My body needs to stretch out a bit.” As if to prove it, he linked his hands together and lifted them above his head, stretching them up to the ceiling while he yawned. He missed the way that Remy’s eyes traveled over the play of muscles across his shoulders and back and down his backside.

First things first, Spencer took himself to the bathroom to take care of a rather pressing need. When he finished with that and had washed his hands, he came back out to the bedroom to find that Remy was already dressed and had sprawled out lazily on the bed. Spencer spared him a smile before he padded his way over to his go bag and knelt down beside it. Though he still felt a bit of a need to stretch himself out, he actually felt rather good. Sleeping that long had given his body time to heal both inside and out. Some of the raw, aching places that had been building inside of him had finally had a chance to rest. It had taken working himself to the exhaustion point but he’d finally given his body the rest that it needed. He was surprised by how clear it left his mind feeling. For days now he’d felt like he was walking around underneath a cloud of grief. Maybe that cloud would return once he and Remy emerged back into the real world. Maybe it was just out there, waiting for him outside this little oasis that they seemed to be hiding in. He didn’t know. What he did know was that here, in this room, he warm, sheltered, cared for, and _safe_ in ways he never had before. He was loathe to leave here and give that feeling up.

When he straightened back up with his clothes in hand, he found Remy watching him through a screen of bangs. A bit of self-consciousness slipped in and Spencer felt a slight flush build in his cheeks. “What?”

What Remy said was the very last thing that Spencer had expected. “Why aint y’ said not’ing about y’r clothes, Spencer?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Y’ only got a few t’ings in dat bag of y’rs.” Remy rolled himself over until he was lying on his stomach. He folded his arms and rested his chin on top of them, his eyes still watching Spencer. “Why didn’t y’ say anyt’ing? Or ask about getting y’ some more stuff.?”

“Oh.” Setting his pile of clothes on top of the dresser, Spencer pulled out his pants and busied himself for a moment with pulling them on. It gave him a good reason to keep from looking over at his friend while he answered him. “I was going to pick up more while I was in Vegas, but, well, you know what happened there. And I can’t exactly ask Morgan to mail me some things here, seeing as how they can’t know where ‘here’ is.”

“Spencer, y’ should’ve said somet’ing.”

Spencer finished buttoning his pants and reached out next for his undershirt. “It’s not a big deal, Remy. I was planning on asking you if we could make a trip into town soon to pick up some things. I need new shampoo and other toiletries.”

The sound Remy made was somewhere between a scoff and a snort. “Of course we can. An y’ can call y’r _ami_ t’day and have him send y’ some t’ings. I’ll give y’ de address to m’ place in de city and y’ can have him send dem dere.”

That worked. He hadn’t thought about doing something like that. All he’d thought about was that he couldn’t give away the address here and he’d been trying to think of a way around that. Spencer nodded a little as he pulled on his shirt and started to do up the buttons. He flashed a shy smile over at Remy. “Thank you.”

“ _Mais oui_. _Je suis désolé_ fo’ not figuring it out sooner. I wish y’ would’ve said somet’ing.”

“It wasn’t a big deal, Remy. It’s just clothes.”

“Aint just clothes.” Remy looked around the room and then settled his gaze back on Spencer, who was folding himself down to the ground to put on his socks and shoes. “Y’ aint got a single personal t’ing in here. Dere’s not’ing here to make dis feel like home to y’. I mean, I know it aint, not really. Y’ probably don’t really feel like dis is home at all.”

“On the contrary.” Spencer interrupted. He looked up from tying his shoe and he let his smile warm a little. “Home isn’t things for me, Remy. It’s a feeling. A sensation that I carry around inside of me. I could be inside of a mansion like this or sleeping out on a park bench—any place can be home.” He finished tying his shoes and pushed himself up off the ground. With one hand he gestured around the room. “Home isn’t any of this. It’s in here,” He brought his hand up and tapped his chest, right over his heart. “And now, it’s in our bond, too, and I carry that with me always. Now, are you ready to go brave the world out there and see what it is that Scott wants from us?”

Remy stared up at him with an expression that Spencer couldn’t quite read, not even with the emotions he felt from his Cajun friend. After a short pause Remy shook his head and rose from the bed in one of those graceful moves that Spencer found himself both appreciative and envious of. He strolled over to Spencer and stopped right in front of him with that same unreadable expression still on his face. Then he stunned Spencer completely by leaning in and kissing his cheek. “Y’r a sweet t’ing, cher.” He said. Ignoring Spencer's flush, he turned towards the door. “Let’s go find Scotty.”

CXCX

For once in his life Spencer had no qualms about projecting a ‘keep away’ sensation around him. It was much more difficult than his ‘don’t see me’ trick that he used, but it was worth the little bit of strain to hold it. The last thing he wanted was to be waylaid by anyone on their way down to see Scott. Remy must’ve felt that he was doing something because he gave him a curious look as they rounded the corner that took them into the hall where Scott’s office was. Spencer saw the look and simply smiled at it. Then he let go of the projection he’d been holding. They were close enough now and there was no one nearby that he could sense that would disturb them. He could also feel a signature up ahead that he had come to label as ‘Scott’. Every person carries a unique emotional signature and Spencer had memorized the ones for the people in this house.

When they reached Scott’s door, Remy knocked on it. It only took a second before they heard the call to come in. Spencer wasn’t surprised in the least when Remy opened the door and stepped in ahead of him. It wasn’t a matter of manners or rudeness. It was a matter of Remy still being protective. The way he moved, angling his body as he went in, spoke as clear as words to Spencer, telling him that Remy was entering first to make sure that the room was safe. Spencer wasn’t bothered by it. Slightly amused, yes, but not bothered.

Scott looked up at their entrance and his whole face seemed to relax a little when he saw who it was. “Remy, Spencer. Come in, come in. Shut the door behind you.” With one hand he gestured them forward. Spencer shut the door once he was inside and then he followed Remy over to the two chairs that sat across the desk from Scott. The field leader had pushed back from the desk a bit and he watched them closely as Spencer sank into one of the chairs and Remy gracefully folded himself down into the other. Behind his sunglasses, sharp eyes took in everything about them, every little move they made. Then his gaze settled firmly on Spencer. “I’m glad to see you’re up and about. We’ve been a bit worried about you. How’re you doing?”

He’d prepared himself as best he could for this. Spencer fought not to squirm under that stare and the concern he could feel radiating from the man. “Thank you, sir. I’m fine. I just needed to replace the energy I burned out, that’s all.”

“Well I’m glad to see you up.” Scott said honestly. He turned to Remy next. “You too. You feeling any better?”

“Remy told y’ b’fore, he’s fine. Quit y’r worrying.” Remy said, rolling his eyes.

Playfully smacking at Remy’s leg, Spencer shot him a chiding look. “Be nice. Your friend is just concerned about you.”

“So?” Remy rolled his head to the side so he could smirk at Spencer. “Y’r point?”

The good humor that he could see on Remy’s face and feel flowing over their bond was enough to boost Spencer's mood just a little more. He felt his own lips start to curve ever so slightly in an echo of Remy’s smirk. It felt really, really good to be able to tease with someone. Not only to be able to tease them, but to know without a doubt in his mind that he was being teased back. Too many times in life Spencer had thought he was being teased when really he was being mocked, or he had taken something serious when it was meant to be teasing. Even with his empathy he hadn’t always been sure. More often than not, he kept himself shielded. But with Remy there was never any doubt. Not only did the bond tell him what Remy was feeling, letting him know he was being teased, but he’d come to know the man and trust him enough to know that nothing Remy said to him would ever be deliberately malicious. “You know, I could’ve sworn I saw you with manners, once.”

“ _Moi_? _Non_ , cher. Must’ve been someone else.” Remy quipped.

“Must have. Silly me.”

“Might be wantin’ to get dat famous memory of y’rs checked.”

The sound of Scott clearing his throat broke into their play. They turned back to him and found him watching them with a look of amusement. “As entertaining as you two are, I didn’t ask you to come see me so I could watch your comedy routine.” He said dryly.

“Well den what was it y’ wanted, Fearless?” Remy asked.

“I wanted to talk about your training. Both of yours.” Scott said. His words surprised them both. Sitting forward in his chair, Scott folded his arms on the desk and rested on them. “Watching you two during our relief efforts, it brought some things to my attention. I think we've been going about this all wrong with you guys. We've been trying to figure out how you two can do things separately – what we should've been doing was figuring out how you can work together. Training you to be a unit.”

Well that definitely got their attention. Spencer sat up just a little straighter and Remy turned more of his attention towards Scott. The two exchanged a quick look with each other before focusing again on Scott. “What do y’ mean, ‘to be a unit’?” Remy asked suspiciously. “Was dere a problem wit’ de way we was workin’ wit’ each other?”

“To put it bluntly? Yes.” Scott said honestly.

While that had Remy going tense, it caused an entirely different reaction in Spencer. The genius nodded his head in understanding. He could see where Scott was going with this and he agreed with him. This was something he’d been thinking about a little bit as well since he’d woken up. “You’re referring to the incident between Remy and Rogue.” Spencer interjected, his quiet voice effectively drawing Remy’s attention off of Scott and over to him. Spencer didn’t even look at him. He kept watching Scott, reading the look on his face and the language his body was showing. “Out in the field you can’t afford to have situations like that happening. But I don’t see how better training us as a unit would prevent a situation like that, sir. The protector in Remy seems to run off a very primal instinct when it comes to my protection.”

“True.” Scott agreed. “And he seems to respond to you well when you try to soothe him .But if we trained you two to work together, to work as the bonded unit you are, not as individuals, then maybe we can prevent something like that before it happens. Maybe knowing your skill levels and knowing just how capable you are of defending yourself might make him slightly less protective. And for those instances that it can’t be prevented, proper training could help you respond better and faster. Listen,” Here Scott paused, looking from one man to the other to make sure that both were paying attention to him. This part was obviously important to him. “I know the two of you are going stir crazy. I know that you’re not doing well being cooped up here. This is my solution to that. Right now, we can’t send you out on any missions, Remy, because we can’t send you without sending Spencer and, I’m sorry, but you’re not trained to go out, Spencer. But this might be a way to get you two out there. Individually, you two are both great people and great assets to this team. Together? You could become an unstoppable pair. All you need is the training to do it.”

Just the mention of going back out on a mission was enough to have Remy sitting up a little more eagerly. There was longing and excitement in him at the prospect. That right there was all that Spencer needed to know. The idea of this training wasn’t exactly Spencer's idea of a good time, but anything that put those kinds of feelings in Remy was at least worth his best effort. Besides, he could admit that going out and doing things, things that would make him feel useful, was very appealing. It would be good to be needed for something again. Spencer pushed down his own worries—when had any kind of training ever come easily to him?—and he lifted his chin ever so slightly. “What is it you want us to do?”

Scott’s lips stretched into a very satisfied smile. “I want you to take a day to finish recovering first. Once Hank’s cleared you two, we’re going to start you in private sessions in the Danger Room in addition to your other sessions. You’ll still train with the team, Remy, and Spencer, you and Ororo will continue your training. She was a smart teacher for you to choose. Once we’ve taught you two to work together, we’ll integrate your training with the others and practice having you two work as a pair with the team.” Pausing, he turned his head towards Spencer. “It’s not going to be easy training, Spencer. It’s going to be hard work. You two are going to have to decide if this is what you really want to do because once we get started, I’m going to push you. I’m not an easy taskmaster, as Remy will probably tell you. I’ll push you hard.”

“I’ll handle it, sir.” Spencer said firmly. Pride wouldn’t let him give any other answer. It helped a little, though, when Remy’s hand settled on his knee and gave a reassuring squeeze.

Scott nodded as if he hadn’t expected anything less. “Of course. You’re sure that you want this? Both of you?” He waited for the nod from both of them. Then he smiled at them again. “Then go ahead and go spend the day relaxing and recovering. Seven a.m. tomorrow morning, report to the Danger Room. I’ll be there waiting for you.”

Seven in the morning? Spencer held in the urge to groan. Great. He’d just signed himself up not only for a bunch of workout and training sessions in which he was pretty much guaranteed to make a fool of himself, but for early morning workout and training sessions. He was going to have to set his alarm early enough to go and get some coffee beforehand or it wasn’t going to end up very pretty in there. He didn’t complain, though. He kept his grumbles purely internal as he rose from his chair and followed Remy out of the room. Once they were in the hallway, Remy dropped an arm around his shoulders and tugged him in close, giving him a friendly squeeze. “Quit y’r worryin’, cher. It’s gonna be fine.”

There was no point in trying to deny his worry to Remy. What was the point? The man could feel all of it anyways. Besides, as Spencer had told him earlier, he and Remy were bound together in what they were slowly coming to see might very well be for the rest of their lives. If he couldn’t be open and honest with Remy, they were doomed before they started. It was a very strange and wonderful feeling to know that he didn’t have to hide anything from this man. That, honestly, he really _couldn’t_ hide anything from him. Spencer sighed out a breath and allowed himself to lean in to Remy’s hold just the slightest bit. “That’s easy for you to say, Rem. You’re not the one that’s going to be making a fool of himself.”

“We aint going in dere to practice t’ings on our own. From de sounds of it, dere aint gonna be a y’ or a me in dere. It’s gonna be us. We’ll rise or fall t’gether, _mon ami_.”

“Why am I not reassured by that?” Spencer mumbled.

“Cause y’r paranoid?”

Spencer tipped his head enough to mock scowl at his friend. “You say that now. Tomorrow, you can’t claim I didn’t warn you. Just you remember that.”

“Warned me of what?” Remy asked as innocently as he could. That innocent look gave way to a laugh when Spencer poked his side. He hugged Spencer in close again and sent a warm feeling through him when he pressed a friendly kiss against the side of Spencer's head. “Ah, cher, don’t worry so hard. I got faith in y’, even if y’ don’t.”

The two rounded a corner and came out of the hallway. Spencer was just about to make some reply to Remy’s words when he felt his partner’s emotions suddenly change. Without having to look, Spencer knew what he was seeing. Looking up only confirmed it. Remy was staring over at a window, looking out to where Rogue stood outside. For a moment the pair just stood there silently. Then Spencer felt Remy squeeze his shoulders once more before sliding his arm free. Red and black eyes turned back to him. “Why don’t y’ go on an get somet’ing to eat, Spencer? I can feel y’r hungry. I’ll come and find y’ in a bit.”

There was a slight reluctance in Spencer to let Remy out of his sight. Not just out of his sight, but over around Rogue. They hadn’t really had a chance to talk about things yet and he worried about what Remy would go say or do. “Remy…”

Remy smiled and him and lifted a hand to lightly pat his cheek. “It’ll be fine, cher. I’ll behave, I promise.”

What else could he do? Biting his lip, Spencer nodded his head. He felt as Remy’s emotions warmed briefly at the same time that the man smiled at him. Then Remy turned away and headed off towards the door and Spencer felt his emotions shift over to something else entirely. Something that made his stomach clench and his heart ache. Spencer wasn’t sure how long he would’ve stood there, waiting and watching, if it hadn’t been for someone coming out of a nearby room. The feel of them brushed against Spencer's mind and had him looking up just seconds before they stepped out into the hallway. At the sight of Kurt, an automatic smile ghosted over Spencer's lips. An answering smile touched Kurt’s lips. “Spencer! It is good to see you awake. You’re looking well.”

“I’m feeling better.” Spencer admitted.

“You deserved your rest. You worked hard out there.”

Spencer shrugged his shoulders, dismissing the compliment. “No harder than anyone else.”

“You don’t give yourself enough credit.” Kurt said kindly. But, he let it go at that.

That was something that Spencer enjoyed about the man. Kurt didn’t push him into talking about things. More often than not, he was a quiet person, a listener instead of a talker. He listened to Spencer even when he rambled about something that had others rolling their eyes or walking away. But if conversation tapered off between them, he was just as comfortable sitting there in silence as he was in talking. That comfortable silence fell around them now as they both started to move as if by silent accord. Spencer set off towards the kitchens to find something to eat as Remy suggested, grateful for the presence of a friend beside him. It helped to distract him slightly from the chaotic emotions he could feel rolling around inside of Remy.

CXCX

Remy’s emotions _were_ in chaos at the moment and he knew that it had to be worrying Spencer. Right at the moment, that just wasn’t something he could focus on. What he was about to do was something very important and it needed his full attention. When he was done, he would go and find Spencer and reassure not only Spencer, but himself as well. He’d let them relax together in each other’s presence and let the warmth of Spencer's trust and affection wash away the ache of all this. But first, he had to take care of this.

It didn’t take but a second after he stepped outside before Rogue noticed him. Her whole posture went stiff and she shot him a furious look. “What the hell do you want, swamp rat? I aint in the mood for your shit right now.”

“We gotta talk, cher.” Remy said calmly.

“Yeah, well, pardon me if I aint up for talking. I’ve been listening to people ‘talk’ all morning long and I’m tired of it. Just leave me alone.”

Remy drew in one last deep breath and then plunged headfirst into this. “We talk now, or we don’t talk at all, Rogue. It’s y’r choice. Y’ walk away now, den dat’s it.”

That stopped her in her tracks. She’d already been turning away from him until his words stopped her. Now she turned slowly back to him, her expression still angry with just a hint of surprise at the edges. She wasn’t stupid and she knew that tone to Remy’s voice. If he’d been yelling at her, she wouldn’t have hesitated to run or fly away. But that calm, steady tone told her more clearly than words just how serious he was right now. This wasn’t a time to fly off in a tantrum. Remy meant exactly what he said. If she walked away now, he’d be done. He wasn’t one for idle threats. She turned to fully face him. “Fine. Say whatever it is you want to say.”

“Remy aint gonna play games wit’ dis and he aint gonna beat around de bush here. Dis is too important.” He drew himself up and tried to prepare for the shit that was about to start. “Whatever issue y’ got wit’ Spencer, it ends now, Rogue. De games y’r playing, all dis petty bullshit, it’s done.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

The falseness in her words had him shaking his head. “Y’ know y’ do. Remy didn’t interfere b’fore cause Spencer didn’t want him to. He wanted to handle it on his own. Well, Remy’s stepping in now. Y’ hurt him, Rogue, and dat aint somet’ing dat Remy can ignore. He aint done a damn t’ing to y’ to deserve being treated dis way.”

Fury lit her face and sparked in her eyes. “Hasn’t done anything? I’ve seen him with you, Remy! That man wants in your pants and you haven’t done much to try stopping him! I’ve seen the two of you. You can’t tell me you’re not attracted to him.” She accused. When she paused, he said nothing and that only served to piss her off more. Her body almost vibrated with her anger. “You don’t even deny it!”

“Why should Remy?” Remy demanded, stunning her. “He aint blind. Anyone wit’ eyes can see how _beau_ Spencer is. Of course Remy’s attracted to him. An wit’ de bond, _oui_ , it’d be easy to start somet’ing dere. Remy aint never denied dat. _Mais_ y’r missin’ one important t’ing here, cher.”

“What?” She spat out.

In contrast to her anger, Remy relaxed a little. Honest emotion was on his face in an open way that was so rare for him. It was enough to stun her into silence. She stood and watched as Remy looked at her, one corner of his mouth quirked up. “Y’ never realized dat Remy loved y’ enough to ignore dat attraction.” Remy said calmly. “He loved y’ enough to stay wit’ y’. Spencer was right—y’r too blinded by y’r jealousy to see anyt’ing. Y’ never saw how much Remy was willing to give up to keep y’ and y’ never saw just how hard Spencer was trying to help make t’ings work fo’ us. An now, y’ fucked t’ings up, girl, and y’ aint got no one but y’rself to blame.”

The seriousness of their conversation finally seemed to be sinking in for her. Her anger was slowly starting to fade away underneath something else; something that made Remy’s insides hurt a little. “Rems…”

He cut her off with a shake of his head. “ _Non_. Y’ showed what y’ got in y’r heart, Rogue, and Remy, he’s done wit’ dis. Y’ had y’r chance and y’ blew it.”

Her eyes grew wide in her face. “I thought you loved me.”

“Remy’s always gonna love y’, Roguie. He just don’t like y’ all dat much right now.” Those quiet words seemed to hit her like a slap. She reared back, hurt flashing over her face, and then temper was snapping back into place. Remy didn’t give her a chance to let out whatever vile words were on her lips. He brushed his hair back from his face and silenced her with a hard glare. “Y’ t’ink Remy’s stupid, cher? He knows y’ been pushing, tryin’ to make him make a choice between y’ and Spencer. Dat’s been y’r goal, aint it? Y’ wanted Remy to pick one or de other.” Remy lifted his hands and spread them out on either side of him. “Well, y’ got y’r wish. It just aint gonna turn out like y’ planned. Remy’s making his choice de only way he can. _Je suis désolé_ it had to be dis way.”

That stunned her more than anything else he’d said. Even through all of this, she’d held on to the fact that their fights never lasted long. He always came back to her. And now, now he was telling her the one thing she’d never thought she’d hear. “You’re picking him over me? But, but I love you, Rem!”

“ _Oui_ , maybe y’ do. _Mais_ y’ don’t trust Remy and y’ don’t often like him, either. Spencer, he trusts Remy an, amazingly enough, he likes Remy too, just de way he is, wit’out tryin’ to change him.” Remy drew himself up a little and he was strengthened by the supportive emotions that were in the bond. They helped him to stand tall and stay firm. Those emotions told him that he was making the right choice here. He met Rogue’s eyes and in his heart he said goodbye. “I’m sorry, Rogue. I really am.” With those last, soft words, Remy made himself turn around and he walked away, leaving her still standing there in the grass behind him.


	21. Chapter 21

Remy didn’t waste any time in going to find his bondmate. Using the bond as a guide, he quickly found his Healer in the kitchens searching through the cupboards for something to eat, with Kurt beside him, looking through the fridge. Spencer turned around as Remy leaned against the doorjamb and Remy could feel the man’s concern and worry flow over towards him even as Spencer gave him that smile of his that he only ever gave to Remy and that never failed to warm Remy straight down to his toes. _How’d it go_? His emotions asked for him. Out loud, he said “Hey, Remy.”

Folding his arms over his chest, Remy smiled back at him. His body answered _Back off_ while his words said “Hey cher, y’ found anyt’ing to eat yet?”

The double conversation continued as Spencer turned to face him. So many things could be said with just body language and emotions, no words needed at all. “No. Why?” _Are you okay?_

 _I don’t want to talk about it._ “Den lets grab y’r coat and head on into town. We can pick y’ up somet’ing to eat dere and get some shopping done.” A corner of Remy’s mouth quirked up in a wry grin. “Being far from here might be a smart plan fo’ a while.”

“That’s fine by me.” _I’m so sorry_. “I’ll just run up and grab a jacket.”

The apology and guilt in Spencer's eyes was almost Remy’s undoing. He couldn’t stand there and watch it play over his face _and_ feel it through their bond. The urge to go reassure the man was almost overwhelming and Remy didn’t really want to do that right now. He wanted to get the hell out of here and forget, just for a little while, the hurt mixed in with the anger that he’d been able to see in Rogue. Pulling out his keys, he called out “Here” and tossed them over to Spencer, slightly amused by how surprised Spencer looked when he actually caught them. “Grab Remy’s extra trench outta his closet while y’r up dere, _s’il tu plait_? An grab y’rself one of Remy’s jackets, too. It’s a bit chilly out dere. Remy’ll meet y’ out in de garage.” Without waiting for a response, Remy turned and left the kitchen to head out towards the garage.

Spencer must’ve practically ran because he joined Remy in the garage rather quickly. Leaning against the hood of his car, Remy watched the man and found that he couldn’t help but shake his head and smile a little. Spencer had brought Remy’s coat, just as he’d asked, and he’d grabbed a ‘coat’ for himself. Only, he hadn’t chosen one of the regular coats. No, he’d grabbed Remy’s Saints zip-up hoodie that was just a bit too big for him. Between that, his young face, and his tousled hair, he looked all of about nineteen or twenty, at most. Remy knew that he looked young for his age, too, just like Spencer did, but like this people were going to look at them and probably end up thinking that Spencer was his younger brother or something like that.

Oblivious to Remy’s humorous thoughts, Spencer came right up to him and held out both trench coat and keys. “I made sure to lock things up once I left.” He reassured Remy.

“ _Merci_.” Remy took the coat and slipped it on. He took his keys next and dropped them into his pocket, startling a little when he felt a bit of weight in there. When he reached his hand down in, he found a fresh deck of cards in there.

Spencer flushed a little and shrugged one shoulder when Remy looked up at him. “I know you don’t like going out unarmed.”

Well that was nice. Remy battled past his foul mood enough to flash Spencer a halfway normal smile. “ _Merci_ , Spencer. Y’ ready to go, den?”

“Mm hm.”

Going around the car, Remy stopped by the driver’s door when he saw that Spencer was still just standing there, only now he was eyeing the car with a look that was far more knowledgeable than Remy had expected to see. Spencer just didn’t seem the car type to him. But the way he was looking at the car wasn’t just idle. There was appreciation there. Then those big eyes of his lifted and met Remy’s. “A ’74 or a ’75?”

“A ’74.” Remy answered, even more surprised now.

He watched as Spencer reached out and ran a hand along the edge of the hood, long fingers stroking across the cool black metal, and Remy found himself watching those fingers and shivering just slightly. His attention was so focused on watching Spencer's slow caress that he almost missed the man’s next words. “I’ve always loved Chargers.” Spencer said fondly. “I learned about cars working on a Charger with my neighbor. He had a ’71. Blue. It was a beautiful car.”

Boy, he was just full of surprises today. Remy pulled open his car door and slipped down inside, waiting until Spencer followed him into the car before telling him, “Never would’ve pegged y’ fo’ de car type.”

Humor danced in Spencer's eyes when he looked over from shutting his door. “Not many do.”  He grabbed the buckle and brought it down, buckling himself in. “But if you stop to think about it, you’ll remember I have a Ph.D. in Engineering, something that quite a few people tend to forget. And engineering is the just the application of scientific, economic, social, and practical knowledge used to invent, design, build, maintain, and improve structures, machines, devices, systems, materials and processes.” Spencer smiled and shrugged one shoulder. “I’ve always been fascinated by how things work.”

Remy slipped the key into the ignition and brought the car to life, smiling the same as Spencer as they listened to the engine. Then he put the car into gear and pulled out of the garage. With the desperation of someone who wants to avoid one topic at all costs, he threw himself into their current conversation, hoping like crazy that it would effectively distract Spencer from the worry he could still feel coming from the man. “Y’ know, y’ got an interesting mix of degrees, Spencer. Dey just seem a strange combination. De mathematics and chemistry, _oui_ , dose seem to go together. An de psychology and sociology, _oui_ , dose too. _Mais_ engineering, philosophy? Dose are like wildcards t’rown in dere. An y’ put dem all together and dey’re a mixed up bunch.”

“They all interested me.” Shifting a little in his seat, Spencer turned himself so that he was more facing Remy, not even paying any attention to where they were going. “Math was always simple to me. I’ve never had to really think about numbers to understand them. So it was sort of logical that I’d study it as high as I could at college. The others, well, I just…I found them interesting. Gaining a degree in these, that was just a bonus to me. A side benefit. All I wanted was to learn and the degrees just come with the territory. They weren’t my goal, though. I didn’t set out saying that I wanted a Ph.D. in this, or a Masters in this, or anything like that. I just studied what I wanted to. If it hadn’t been for Gideon approaching me about a job at the Bureau, I would’ve continued on and earned a few more degrees. I was thinking of studying either forensic anthropology or furthering my study of psychology.”

“Forensic anthropology?”

“In basic terms, a forensic physical anthropologist can assist in the identification of deceased individuals whose remains are decomposed, burned, mutilated or otherwise unrecognizable.” Spencer answered him easily. Then he drew in a deep breath and continued on his trend of surprising Remy. “Are we really going to discuss forensic anthropology or are we eventually going to address the rather large metaphorical elephant in the car? Because I can bore you with details of something that you probably have no real interest in at all, or we could talk about what happened back there with you and Rogue that has you feeling so hurt and guilty.”

“Dere’s not’ing to talk about.” Remy insisted automatically. His hands clenched down a little on the wheel and he kept his focus firmly on the road. This was the last thing he wanted to talk about right now. The very last thing. He still felt too raw inside, too exposed. Right now he was more likely to get defensive and end up saying something he’d regret.

Spencer wasn’t willing to let it go that easily, though. His concern was strong enough to override everything else, as well as another emotion that Remy couldn’t quite place. One he didn’t really want to take the time to place. “I think there is. What happened out there, Remy?”

“Not’ing y’ need to worry bout.”

“Of course I’m going to worry.” Spencer said calmly. “You’re my partner, Remy. I’m always going to worry when something bothers you.”

“Contrary to what y’ may t’ink, just cause we’re bonded don’t mean dat y’ got de right to know every damn t’ing bout Remy.” He snapped before he could stop himself.

Almost as soon as he said the words, he regretted them, especially when he saw Spencer visibly flinch out of the corner of his eye. But he didn’t get a chance to apologize for them. Spencer drew in a breath and straightened up and he pushed on. “Maybe not, but seeing as how this concerns me, I think I have the right to ask about it. Your fight with her was over what happened between she and I, wasn’t it?”

Remy couldn’t keep the low curses from boiling out of him. As always when backed into a corner, he lashed out, using words just as sharp as any knife. “Back off, Spencer! De whole damn world don’t revolve around y’, so quit t’inking bout just y’rself. Remy don’t wanna talk about dis so just back de fuck off.”

This time Spencer's flinch was more internal than external. A jolt through his emotions that echoed brightly across their bond. On the outside, his face became a mask, blank and impassive. “Fine.”  His voice was just as flat and empty as his expression was. “I’m terribly sorry I stepped where I wasn’t wanted. I’ll leave you to your thoughts. Wake me when we get to town.” Spencer gave Remy no chance to say anything; he turned himself towards the window and curled up like he was going to sleep and then he shut down in a way that didn’t feel normal. It wasn’t like he was asleep, or even the stillness of his meditation. His emotions shut down like they’d been when he was unconscious. When the hell had he learned to shield their bond like that?

Guilt burned bright inside of Remy. Dammit, this was why he hadn’t wanted to do this! He knew he got defensive when he felt this way and he knew that his mouth tended to run away from him when he was defensive. It had gotten him into a hell of a lot of trouble over the years. But the last thing he’d wanted to do was hurt Spencer and that was exactly what he’d managed to do. He’d felt the hurt right before Spencer had shut off. “ _Merde_.” Blowing out a breath, Remy cast a look over at Spencer. “I didn’t mean dat, Spencer. I know y’ aint t’inking bout y’rself right now. I stay stupid shit sometimes.”

There was no response from his companion. Not even a twitch to his body or a change to his emotions. Nothing.

A little more concerned than before, Remy gave Spencer another quick look, darting his eyes between Spencer and the road. “Spencer? C’mon, cher. Y’ gon’ give me de cold shoulder now?”

Still nothing.

Concern growing, Remy reached out over their bond next, trying to send emotions down to Spencer and sense his emotions in return. “Y’r scaring me now, Spencer. Say somet’ing, would y’? Curse at me. Somet’ing.” His words seemed to have no effect. Remy’s fear grew even stronger.

It was the wave of fear that did it. He knew it was going down the bond to his partner, he couldn’t stop it, and when his fear grew, a big wave of it bled over to Spencer. In the blink of an eye Remy felt the bond shift and open wide again and Spencer's emotions were right there once more, his concern pouring over Remy in warm, comforting waves, and then the young man was turning quickly in his seat, one hand reaching out to touch Remy’s arm, wide brown eyes coming to lock on his face. “What is it? What’s going on?”

“ _Fils de putain_.” Relief had Remy relaxing his death grip on the steering wheel. He spotted a wide shoulder ahead and didn’t hesitate to pull the car over. Once he had them safely on the shoulder, he put the car in park and spun to face his partner who was watching him with wide, worried eyes. “Why don’t y’ tell me what’s going on? What de hell happened dere, Spencer?”

“What are you talking about?” Spencer furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

“What…” Remy gaped at him for a moment. “I’m talking bout dat zombie impression y’ just did! Y’ got pissed and y’ just, y’ shut down on me. Y’ weren’t answering me when I was talking, y’ weren’t moving, and de bond felt as empty as it does when y’r unconscious.”

He watched as Spencer's eyes went impossibly wider for a moment and his eyebrows shot up in a look of surprise. “Oh.”

“Oh? Dat’s all y’ got to say? _Oh_?”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it’d cause such a drastic reaction.” Seeing Remy’s expression, Spencer turned towards him a little more and hurried to explain, obviously able to tell that Remy was close to the end of his rope here. “I’m sorry, Remy, I don’t mean to sound vague. I just, it’s not something that I’ve ever really had to explain before. It’s just something that I learned how to do when I was younger and I tend to do it when, well, in certain situations.”

“What de hell did y’ do? It was like y’ knocked y’rself out somehow!”

“I didn’t. I just…went inside my head.” Biting his bottom lip, Spencer looked like he was trying to find the words he needed. Remy kept quiet and waited. He could see that Spencer was going to explain; he just needed a second to put it together. Sure enough, he drew in a breath after a moment and finally spoke again. “Having an eidetic memory grants me a much stronger sense of recall than the average person. The clarity and detail with which I recall something is very high. If I want to, I can pull up a memory, a thought, and I can sort of, it’s like, I lose myself in that moment. Kind of like how a telepath can pull into their own mindscape and separate somewhat from their body. I just, I pull into my memories, or whatever it is I’m focusing on, and I can shut things off around me. I could feel how angry and defensive I was making you and I knew I was only making things worse, not better, so I figured I’d give you the space you needed and I pulled up a memory of one of my favorite books.”

Remy couldn’t believe it. He sat there and stared for a long comment, trying to process what he’d just heard. “So, wait a second.” He said slowly, holding one hand out between them in a bid for silence. “Y’r telling me dat I was over here panicking cause I couldn’t feel y’ and y’ wasn’t responding, and y’ was over dere _reading a book_?”

Color stained Spencer's cheeks and his eyes dropped down towards his lap. “It would appear so.”

“ _Mon Dieu_.”

“I’m really sorry for scaring you, Remy. I didn’t know it would feel that way to you. I’ve never been around anyone with whom it would be an issue before.”

The fact that Spencer was sitting there apologizing when Remy knew full well that it wasn’t Spencer who’d been the dick was enough to slap him out of his shock and back into the moment. Spencer's little quirks could be talked about later. Bringing both hands up, Remy ran them over his face and wrangled control of his emotions. Only when he was sure they were steady did he lift his eyes to Spencer once more. He also reached out and took Spencer's hands in his. “Y’ aint de one dat should be apologizing. I never should’ve snapped at y’. I’m feelin’ a little raw right now, me. Dat’s all. _Mais_ , it’s no excuse fo’ talking to y’ dat way. It was rude and I was wrong. _Je suis désolé,_ Spencer.”

“I shouldn’t have pushed so hard.” Spencer countered. He looked up shyly through his bangs. “I just, I don’t like to see you hurting, especially not because of me.”

Well that was one thing he could set straight right here and right now. Remy gave Spencer's hands a squeeze. “It aint because of y’. No matter what y’ t’ink, dis aint y’r fault. _Non_ , cher,” He said when it looked like Spencer was going to argue. “It aint. De _femme_ made her choice. Y’ did everyt’ing y’ could to try and make it easy fo’ her and she wouldn’t let it go. Dis aint on y’. Don’t take dat guilt on y’r shoulders.”

“I didn’t exactly help when I yelled at her or pushed her.” Spencer pointed out.

“Dat weren’t no call to send y’ flying into a wall. An it aint no excuse fo’ de way she been treating y’ all de rest of de time neither. I’m serious, Spencer. She made her choice. She couldn’t see past her jealousy. So I made my choice, and I’d make de same one again. Can y’ understand dat?”

“I can try.”

“Good.” Remy gave Spencer's hands one final squeeze before letting them go. “Den let’s go to town and leave all dis bullshit behind us fo’ a while. Y’ need a bunch of new shit and I need to do some serious therapy shopping. De rest of it’ll be waiting when we get home.”

CXCX

Spencer hadn’t had any idea what it was he was getting himself into by agreeing to shop with Remy. He learned his lesson soon enough. First things first the two of them went to the mall where Remy proceeded to drag him from store to store. This truly seemed to be ‘therapy shopping’ as Remy had claimed in the car. All his problems were pushed aside, everything forgotten, underneath a good humor that grew the more that they shopped. The Cajun not only bought things here and there for himself, he also kept grabbing things for others that he thought they might like, Spencer included. All the while he made a point to make sure that he took Spencer to places where he could start to replenish his clothing supply. He surprised Spencer even more by not once questioning the type of clothes that Spencer chose for himself or even teasing him about them. If anything, he helped Spencer find them, and he even helped pick out some new slacks that were made of a better material and were infinitely more comfortable to wear than his usual ones were. The only thing that he insisted on that Spencer hadn’t thought of was clothes to wear in the Danger Room.

“Y’ need something to work out in, cher.” Remy told him as he sifted through the pants in front of him. “Some pants, some shirts, an better shoes.”

Spencer looked down at his feet and back up to Remy. “What’s wrong with my shoes?”

“Aint not’ing wrong wit’ dem, Dey just aint gonna be comfortable fo’ practicing in. Y’ need somet’ing comfortable dat y’ can move easily in. Y’ trust me. Scotty and Stormy, dey’re gonna work y’ hard. Y’ wanna take all de precautions y’ can to be comfortable.”

“How very reassuring.” Spencer said dryly. Remy just laughed.

That was how Spencer found himself with not only one, but two new pairs of shoes, a pack of basic white undershirt tanks, five plain t-shirts, and five pairs of exercise pants, all of which were personally picked out by Remy. The only real input that Spencer gave was material. There were just some things he couldn’t stand having touch his skin for long periods of time. When they started to make their way to the register, Spencer looked down at the stack in his arms and then slanted a look to Remy. “Are you sure I really need all this?”

“ _Oui_. It’s always better to have a good set of comfy clothes to work out in.”

“I haven’t worked out since my days in the academy.” And those days were enough to make Spencer shudder a little. They had not been his best moments.

Remy picked up on his unease and put an arm around his shoulder as they stood up at the register and Spencer set his things down. He smiled at Spencer and ruffled his hair, laughing when Spencer mock-scowled at him and swatted his hand away. “Quit worrying so much about dis, Spencer. Y’r gonna be fine. It aint like we’re demanding y’ run in a marathon or not’ing. Just a bit of self-defense and such, dat’s all.”

“Just a bit of self-defense.” Spencer said mockingly. He shook his head at Remy. “You have no idea. There’s a reason I didn’t chase down Unsubs. I was perfectly content to protect myself with my gun and my mind.”

“Y’r mouth, y’ mean.” Remy teased.

The clerk behind the counter chuckled a little at their banter while he rang up some of Spencer's things. “Starting a new training program?” He asked in a friendly voice.

Remy beamed at the guy and nodded. “ _Oui_. He’s just a being paranoid bout it.”

“Paranoid?” Spencer froze in the act of pulling out his wallet and turned his head to gape at Remy. “I am not being paranoid! You just wait and see. When I end up accidentally knocking you unconscious with my gracelessness, you can’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“If y’ manage to knock me out, den I’m losin’ m’ touch.” Remy countered.

Rolling his eyes, Spencer ran his card through the machine in front of him and input his code. He watched the receipt print and then the clerk was putting it into one of the bags and handing the bags over to them, smiling good-naturedly at them. “Best of luck to you.”

“Thanks. I’ll need all the luck I can get.” Spencer said.

Remy kept his arm around Spencer's shoulders as the two of them made their way back out into the main part of the mall. With his other hand, he carried the few bags that they still had with them. A few stores back Remy had popped outside for a moment to take the things they’d already bought and put them in the car. They’d only made a few purchases since then so they thankfully didn’t have much to carry with them. Judging by the way Remy was trying to steer them, they were going to have more to carry soon. The man looked like he was moving over towards another store and Spencer knew he had to cut him off before he got too close or who knew how long they’d be in there. There was one quick way to stop him and Spencer didn’t hesitate to use it. After making sure no one was close enough to run into them, Spencer firmly planted his feet and stopped right in the middle of the walkway. It worked perfectly. Remy stopped the instant he did, barely even pulling on him before he realized that Spencer had stopped.

He didn’t give Remy any time to say anything. The minute the man turned to look at him, Spencer was talking. “I am not going into another store yet. I seem to recall being promised food before we set out here and that promise has been sadly unfulfilled thus far. I’m heading over to the food court. Whether you want to come with me or test our distance and stay here and go to this store, that’s up to you. But I’m ready for something to eat.”

Amusement danced over their bond and it tugged at Remy’s lips. Spencer knew that he would see it in Remy’s eyes if those damn sunglasses weren’t in the way. Remy gave his shoulders a squeeze and turned them in the direction of the food court. “How could I fo’get? Let’s go feed y’, den, b’fore y’ starve on me here.”

“Good. I was beginning to waste away over here.” Spencer said impishly.

That drew a laugh from Remy that warmed Spencer inside. “We can’t have dat happening. How about dat Thai place right up dere? Or do y’ wanna satisfy dat junk food kick y’ got and go eat over at de McDonald’s over dere?”

Spencer shifted his bags enough that he could reach out and smack his hand against Remy’s stomach. “Quit picking on my eating habits. I’m not that bad. And Thai works fine by me.”

“Not dat bad?” Remy steered them through the crowd and over to the line outside of the Thai food place. “Cher, y’ eat like y’r a teenager. I don’t know how de hell y’r still so damn skinny.”

“I have an extremely fast metabolism and a high percentage of lean muscle tissue.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Remy held up his hand and made the ‘talk’ gesture at Spencer. “Basically, y’r one of dem lil shits dat can eat all dey want and not worry about it.”

Spencer laughed at that and turned towards Remy a little more. This time he patted Remy’s stomach instead of smacking it. “You act like you have to worry about weight, Remy. You’re not exactly overweight here by any definition of the word.”

“ _Non, mais_ I work out constantly and dat keeps me in shape. Y’ aint gotta do a damn t’ing. Y’r just free to eat how y’ want.”

Because he couldn’t deny it, Spencer smiled. “If I’m free to eat how I want, then I want a number 7.” He leaned in without really thinking about it and let his head drop down to rest against Remy’s shoulder while his arm slipped around Remy’s waist. Neither man thought anything of it as they stood there together, looking for all the world like any other couple in the mall.

In no time at all the two had their food and had made their way over to a table. When they settled in, Spencer set himself to his food with a single-mindedness that surprised the man across from him. Remy watched Spencer's face for a moment and unashamedly read him through their bond. What he found had him wincing slightly with guilt. Dammit, he hadn’t stopped to think at all when they left about the fact that Spencer was still recovering. Sure, he’d slept a hell of a long time and he’d recovered quite a bit from what he’d done, but his body still needed a way to replenish the energy it had put out, and food was the most logical way to do that. Coming to a mall and wandering around for hours through large groups of people had probably been the stupidest thing to do. Not only should he have kept Spencer home and resting, he should’ve kept him away from people until he was sure his shields would hold up against it. But all he’d been thinking of earlier was getting as far away from the Mansion as possible. Or, as far away from Rogue as possible, before she tried anything. He’d known her temper was up and he hadn’t wanted either him or Spencer to end up on the receiving end of it.

“Remy?” Spencer's hesitant voice brought Remy out of his thoughts. Concern was on Spencer's face as he watched his friend carefully. “Is everything okay?”

Remy realized that he’d just been sitting there staring at him, not talking, not eating. He picked up his fork and tried to push away his darker thoughts. “ _Mais oui_ , cher. Just t’inking too hard, dat’s all.”

It took effort, but Spencer bit his tongue and kept his words behind his teeth. He wanted to press the issue, to ask Remy what he was thinking about that had made him look so sad. Was he thinking about Rogue? He hadn’t yet come out and said how that conversation had gone but Spencer could take a pretty good guess. Guilt gnawed at his stomach and stole away a bit of his appetite. Dropping his eyes, he watched as he pushed bits of food around his tray. What had happened to the good mood they’d had when he’d woken up? He wanted to go back to that. Back to lying there in bed, playing around and laughing, just enjoying one another’s company without something coming in to taint it all. Instead they were here with this thing sitting between them, a thing that he couldn’t even talk about, and he had no idea how to make it better or to make it go away. Silence fell over the table as the two men slid down into their own thoughts, the good mood they’d built slowly fading away.


	22. Chapter 22

It was a slightly subdued pair that finally returned to the mansion. When Remy excused himself, saying he was going to go have a smoke and maybe find Logan, Spencer didn’t hesitate to tell him to go on ahead. He gathered up his new clothes and took them downstairs to get started on washing them, something his mother had taught him. All new clothes had to be washed before being worn. He got them into the washer and the washer running and then took himself upstairs to the library to maybe grab a few books as a way to occupy himself until the wash was done. If he’d been paying more attention to what was around him, he never would’ve stepped foot in the library. But he was still so lost in his own thoughts and worries that he didn’t notice anyone was in the library until it was already too late.

Spencer was only a few steps in the door when he heard one of the last voices he wanted to hear. “Oh, great.” Rogue’s southern drawl echoed mockingly around the library, making Spencer jerk his head up, eyes going right to her. She stood over by the window, a spray bottle in one hand and a rag in the other, and a furious sneer on her face. “What the hell do you want? You come here to gloat?”

The sharp words and nasty emotions hit him like a slap and he flinched back from them. “I just, I was here to grab a book.” He defended himself, the words tumbling past his lips. He looked at her and it was easy to see and feel the anger coming off of her, but it was the pain underneath it that really ripped at him. He wasn’t an idiot; between Remy’s words and emotions earlier and Rogue’s words and emotions now, he had a pretty good idea what Remy had done. Spencer brought one arm around his waist and held on to himself to try and help give himself the courage to meet her gaze and say what he felt he had to say. “I’m sorry, Rogue. This—this wasn’t what I wanted.”

Her sneer grew more pronounced and the anger and pain spiked slightly. “Yeah, right. You were set out to win this just as much as I was.” She spat out. “Well, kudos to you, sugar. You won. The Cajun’s all yours.”

“This wasn’t what I wanted, Rogue.” Spencer repeated.

“Oh don’t bullshit me, you scrawny little freak.” Dropping her items down onto the desk, Rogue turned fully towards him. “Let’s be honest here. It’s just you and me. No Remy around to save your ass. I think the least you owe me is some damn honesty!”

She was right; she was absolutely right. He owed her honesty. It was the least he could give her, considering this whole thing was his fault. None of this would be happening if he wasn’t in the mix. But she was wrong when she said that Remy wasn’t here to save him. It wouldn’t take long before Remy would begin to wonder about Spencer's emotions and not long after that before he’d try to seek him out and find out what was wrong. If they were going to talk here, honestly, than he had to take some precautions. Since he was still right by the door, it was an easy thing to turn around and shut it. He calmly flipped the lock, too. It wouldn’t hold Remy for long if he showed up but maybe it would hold long enough. Then he turned back around to face her once more. “Okay, Rogue. You want honesty?”

“I damn well deserve it!” She snapped.

He doubted she knew what she was asking for. Yet, she’d asked, and he would deliver. Even if it got him in trouble. “Fine. What do you want to know?”

“I want you to admit it.” Stalking towards him, she stopped a few feet in front of him and crossed her arms over her chest. “I want you to admit that you want him all to yourself. You wanted to take him from me.”

“That’s not what I wanted, Rogue.” Spencer said softly. He felt her pain aching in her and he ached right along with her.

His answer only infuriated her. “I’m not a damn idiot! I know you want him!”

“Absolutely.” Spencer admitted, stunning her for a moment. “I never said that I didn’t. I think almost every person that Remy comes across wants him in some form or another. I’d dare anyone to be bonded to him the way that I am and _not_ want him. But that doesn’t mean that I wanted to split you two apart. In fact, that’s the last thing I wanted.”

“Like hell if I believe that.”

“I don’t think you understand how this bond works, Rogue. How it ties Remy and I together. I feel everything that he feels. I can feel how much he cares about you, just like I can feel how badly this hurts him. Why on earth would I want to do anything to make him hurt? To make either of you hurt?” Spencer drew in a deep breath to try and steady his nerves. When he continued, his voice was calm, controlled. "There is no shutting this off for either of us. There is no escape one another--ever. I will always feel anything he feels and vice versa. I know that right now, judging by his emotions, he's outside smoking. Most likely with Logan, as he's feeling that warm twist he only gets around his friends. I know he's smoking because there's this certain light buzz he feels when he lights up and takes that first drag off the cigarette and then he relaxes just the slightest bit and starts to calm."

It looked like Rogue was going to say something, most likely a nasty something judging by the look on her face, but Spencer was on a roll and he just spoke right over top of her.

“I know when he eats something he likes or dislikes, or when he smells something tasty. When he got hurt the other day, I felt it as it happened. I felt the pain run down my spine like I was being ripped open; that’s how I knew how bad it was, how much agony he was in. Don’t you get it, Rogue?” Exasperation finally broke through his calm and wove through his voice. “We’re both empaths, he and I. Granted, his charm is a lesser version, but it is still based in empathy, and our bond is built on that empathy. But that’s not all it is. This thing, it ties us together tighter than anything. We’re connected to one another as much as your nervous system is connected to your body. You can’t separate us. And we can’t hurt one another as it only hurts ourselves.”

He could see in her face that his words were having no effect on her whatsoever. She was too caught up in her anger and her hurt for her to really listen to anything right now. She ignored what he said entirely and slashed a hand through the air as if to cut the words away. “I don’t want to hear about how you’re both _entwined together_. He was my boyfriend; I get to make the decisions, not you!”

“I didn’t make any decisions for Remy and you. Whatever happened, that was between you two. Until you brought it up, I had no idea what your private conversation was over.”

“The swamp rat came crying to you – I know he did! I saw you go out in his car. I bet he told you all my secrets!"

"Remy" Spencer stressed his name, "Told me nothing about what you discussed. He barely talked except to shop! He doesn’t break confidences! He’s got too much honor for that." She was free to insult him all that she wanted, but he’d be damned if he’d let her stand there and insult Remy. The man didn’t deserve it. His temper spiked again and he felt Remy’s increasing worry, reminding him that he was supposed to be keeping calm if he wanted to keep Remy out of here. He took a few deep breaths and sent a wave of reassurance to his bondmate, an emotional request to not worry about things. Hopefully that would hold him over.

Any hope he had at a true calm started to vanish with her next words. “Ttch!” Rogue clicked her tongue and scoffed at him. “Like I’d believe a skinny little jerk like you. You showed up here out of nowhere and wormed your way into his life, making him believe who knows what lies about this supposed bond you have. You’ve got him trapped in the mansion, unable to be himself, unable to do what he’s meant to do. You’ve changed who he is and made him turn his back on me, on his friends, on everything!”

Spencer flinched underneath her words, which seemed to be pulling up every little fear he had, every thought that haunted him when he was alone and worrying about what this bond was doing to them, about what it was doing to Remy.

She saw his flinch and he felt a flare of satisfaction from her. She took a step forward, eyes sparking with her temper. “You’ve taken him and changed him into a freak, just like you.” She snarled out, lifting a hand and jabbing a finger into his chest. “He used to go out and have fun. He used to flirt and play and fight and all sorts of shit. Now he’s turned into some snarling guard dog for you. He aint the dangerous guy he used to be. He’s just some tamed little bitch on a leash that jumps when you say jump…”

“That is enough.” A wave of righteous anger shoved away any of Spencer’s hurt and fear. How dare she? How dare she stand there and talk about him like that! Spencer drew himself up, his arm dropping away from his waist to hang at his side, his hands clenching into fists. His own eyes were sharp now and flashing with true anger. No one – _no one_ – got to talk about Remy that way. Especially not this woman! “How dare you talk about him like that? You call yourself his girlfriend? If you loved him even half as much as you claim you do, you’d never talk about him that way.”

“Now just a…”

“That man is a far greater person than you give him credit for being. I’ve heard how you treat him and I’ve seen how you’ve acted since you’ve been here. The way you talk to him, the way you talk about him, is absolutely appalling. How on earth can you claim that you love him when all I’ve seen you do is hurt him?” His voice was quiet, but it carried a ferocious intensity behind each word. “I started out feeling guilty about this whole thing, but I can see now how idiotic that was on my part. He’s better off without your poisonous excuse for love in his life.”

He never saw it coming as her hand lifted and struck out at him. The force of the blow to his cheek had his head swinging to the side and a loud _CRACK_ echoing through the room around them.

Spencer brought a hand up to touch at his cheek, fingers lightly ghosting over it to check the damage, feeling the heavy throb and ache, the sharp sting – and who knew a silk glove could cause such a sting? – and the heat that was quickly rising to the area. His already present headache was now doubled and he swore his ears were ringing, made even louder by the sudden heavy silence that fell over the room. Spencer's fingers brushed down his cheek as he opened his mouth and wiggled his jaw slightly. He ran his tongue over his teeth to check to see if she’d managed to loosen any of them. He knew he was damn lucky she’d pulled her blow. A strike like that could’ve easily broken his jaw if she’d wanted it to. Still, it had been a lot harder than the average woman’s would’ve been. Stronger than some men, too. There was no doubt his face was going to swell from this one.

Hurt and anger lay like a thick cloud over the room, almost smothering them, keeping them frozen in place. They stood there in this strange little tableau and just stared at one another, their venomous words still ringing around them, mixing in with the echo of that slap, bouncing off the walls and ringing in their ears. Spencer was so caught up in it that he didn’t even notice Remy’s presence getting closer. Not until the sound of someone trying to open the locked door broke into the moment. That sound shattered the spell that seemed to hold them. Spencer and Rogue both turned to look as there was a quick scratching sound and then the lock on the door turned just seconds before it burst open. Spencer had enough time for the vague thought that Remy had picked that lock awfully fast, and then the Cajun was almost flying into the room with Logan right on his heels.

“What de hell is going on in here?” Remy demanded. It was easy to see the instant his gaze landed on Spencer's face, even with his sunglasses on. His whole body snapped taunt and he was at Spencer's side in just two quick steps. “ _Dieu._ Y’r face…” One hand lifted as if he would touch Spencer's cheek.

To Remy’s surprise, Spencer took a full step back from him, the move stopping Remy in his tracks. Spencer cast a brief look over to Rogue, who was just standing there staring like she was still somehow in shock, and then he flicked his eyes back to Remy. In that instant he knew how he wanted to handle this. He was proud of how calm his voice came out when he told Remy “It’s nothing.”

“Dis sure don’t look like not’ing to me.” Remy almost growled the words out.

The anger on Remy’s face and in the bond only strengthened Spencer's resolve. “It is to me.” He said firmly. He met Remy’s eyes, refusing to back down from this. “This was a private conversation between Rogue and myself, Remy. I respected you enough to stay back when you spoke with her and I’ve respected the fact that you haven’t wanted to talk about it, despite the fact that it involves me. Show me the same courtesy.” While Remy was still staring at him, stunned, Spencer took a step backwards. “Now, if you’ll all excuse me, I need to go switch my clothes over to the dryer. I’ll see you in the morning, Remy.” Those last words carried a clear message to them, letting Remy know that he expected to sleep alone tonight. Without waiting for Remy to respond, he turned and made for the door, slipping easily past Logan.

He kept his steps steady and unhurried while he made his way downstairs to the laundry room. The steady tread behind him wasn’t missed. Logan was following him. For the moment, Spencer didn’t care. He just didn’t give a damn. His own emotions were still too unsteady for him to focus on anyone else’s.

Spencer took pride in the fact that he held it together long enough to get to the laundry room and even through getting his clothes into the dryer. It only started to fracture on him when he was done and he had to turn around and face Logan. The serious faced man was leaning against the closed door, those bright blue eyes locked on Spencer's face. Unfolding his arms from his chest, he gestured to a chair by the table against the far wall where people often folded their clothes at. “Have a seat and let me take a look at that.”

“It’s not that bad, Logan.”

“Let me put it this way, Stretch. Either you sit there and let me look, or I haul you downstairs and let Blue look at ya. Take your pick.”

Damn all these overprotective people in his life. Spencer held in a sigh and obediently went to the chair as directed. He dropped down into it with just a little more force than was necessary. The low chuckle he heard from Logan told him that the small display of temper hadn’t been missed. His friend walked right over to him and reached out to catch his chin in a surprisingly gentle hand. Spencer closed his eyes against the light as his face was tipped upwards to be examined. “Looks like she caught ya good.” Logan rumbled. Spencer was surprised to realize that there was concern there, but not the extreme overprotectiveness he’d half expected. Logan didn’t even really sound all that upset. “She loosen any teeth?”

“No.” Spencer slit his eyes open and peeked up through his lashes. Even Logan’s expression was calm.

Gentle fingers ghosted over his cheek so lightly they barely caused any pain. “No broken bones, no loose teeth. At least she pulled her punch a bit. Should ice it, though.”

“She slapped, not punched.”

Logan nodded at that. “Makes sense. You must’ve pissed her off pretty damn good.”

Now that really had Spencer opening his eyes. This wasn’t the route he’d expected Logan to take at all. It threw him off balance. He grew just a little cautious. Still, he answered honestly, knowing and accepting his part in all of this. “I did. I took exception to how she was talking about Remy, but it was no excuse for speaking to her the way I did. She had a right to be angry.” Spencer drew in a breath and squared his shoulders. “This was as much my fault as hers, Logan. I could’ve walked out of that library at any point instead of staying in there to talk to her. I could feel how angry and hurt she was. She was in no condition to keep a cool head. I should’ve been the practical one and walked away from the situation.”

“That girl aint never kept a cool head.” Logan snorted and shook his head. His fingers moved one last time over Spencer's cheek before letting go. “What’s between you and her aint none of my business, Stretch. I just wanted to make sure she didn’t break your face.”

The more he got to know the man, the better Spencer was getting at reading between the lines with Logan’s words. His softened his expression and smiled at the gruff man. “I’m okay, Logan. Really. It’s just been a long couple days. I’ll finish my laundry, get some sleep, and I’ll be fine come morning.” Much to Logan’s surprise, Spencer pushed up off the chair and, after a slight hesitation, he reached out and gave the feral an awkward hug. “Thanks for caring.”

Embarrassed by his own actions, Spencer held on only for a moment and then he let go and turned, hurrying out of the room, leaving behind a bemused and touched Logan.


	23. Chapter 23

The exhaustion that he’d been carrying with him most of the day helped to pull Spencer down into sleep that night. Without it, he knew he would’ve been up wondering and worrying. But his head hit the pillow and he was out within moments. For the first few hours, he slept the sleep of the exhausted. There had just been too much lately that had happened and his body and mind were still trying to recover from it. Deep sleep like this was one of the best healers out there. But as he evened out of the healing sleep and into a more normal sleep, it left him open to something else entirely, something that he’d been lucky to not have problems with so far here—nightmares.

Nightmares had always plagued Spencer's sleep, more so as his years at the BAU went on. But while staying here he’d been blissfully without them. He’d given absent thought to it, wondering if it was because of the bond, or if it was because Remy so often ended up in bed with him and the man’s physical presence left Spencer feeling safer than he ever had before. He wasn’t sure which one it was and he hadn’t really cared to think about it. Why question something so good? So long as the nightmares were gone, that was what counted, right? He didn’t give them another thought. Not until tonight. Not until now. Not until he shot up in bed in the darkened room, a choked off cry on his lips, his heart racing from that familiar terror.

It took a few minutes for Spencer to actually recognize where he was. For a couple breaths, all he could see around him were the hands reaching out to him, bodies crawling towards him, and he swore he could hear the voices crying out to him right alongside the pounding of his heartbeat and the gasping sound he was making as he tried to draw air in.

At one point in time, Spencer would’ve gotten up and turned all the lights in his room on, maybe gone to take a shower or splash his face with water. He probably would’ve ended up in the kitchen making himself a pot of coffee as he tried to push back the images that would be trying to suck him back down into his nightmare. Tonight, he did none of that. He didn’t even think about doing it. Still mostly caught in the dregs of his dream, his heart pounding with the terror of it, he did the only thing that made any sort of sense to him. He shot out of his bed and scrambled quickly over towards the door. He didn’t even stop to think about what he was doing as he hurried out of his room, not even bothering to grab his robe or shut his door behind him when he left. All he could think about was getting to the one person that he knew he’d be safe with. Like a child, he moved without thought towards comfort. That need gave him the courage to simply open up the door to Remy’s room without even bothering to knock, something he would’ve yelled at Remy for doing to him.

He was barely in the door when he felt Remy go from asleep to awake and on high alert. Spencer didn’t care. He didn’t even pause to tell Remy it was him. With the nightmare still clutching at him, Spencer went right up to Remy’s bed and climbed in, moving immediately towards the older man. Remy, for his part, reacted quickly. He was already half sitting up by the time that Spencer climbed up and he didn’t hesitate to open his arms up to his bondmate. Spencer almost fell into them. He buried his face in against Remy’s neck, arms wrapping around his bare torso, and he practically burrowed in against the man.

Remy held him tightly with one arm and brought his other hand up to cup the back of Spencer's head, holding him close. His body moved a little and then Spencer found himself being drawn into Remy’s lap like a child. Remy stroked over his hair soothingly as he started to rock in place a little. “Shh, shh, it’s okay, _bébé_. It’s okay. Y’r safe. I got y’ and y’r safe.”

He didn’t ask Spencer what was going on or what was wrong, which was a good thing because Spencer doubted he would’ve been able to answer. He was still gasping for breath and, to his utter embarrassment, the backs of his eyes were burning with tears he was fighting hard not to let fall. God. _God_! It had felt so damn real. It _still_ felt real, like it was all just waiting out there for him, waiting to strike again and grab him, drag him back down. Spencer knew he was shaking but he couldn’t stop it. His body shook with shivers that were like spasms. Remy pulled him in a little closer, murmuring against his hair, and he pushed warmth and affection down the bond to Spencer while at the same time grabbing his quilt and pulling it around his trembling body until Spencer was cocooned in warmth and safety in Remy’s lap. Even then, though the shakes lessened, they still didn’t quite go away. Nor could he bring himself to loosen his grip on Remy.

“Y’r okay, Penny.” Remy promised him. He stroked a hand over Spencer's hair and kissed the crown of his head. “Y’r safe here. I got y’.”

“It felt so _real_.” Spencer found himself choking out.

His aching words had Remy giving him a squeeze. “It wasn’t real. It was just a dream, cher. Y’ must’ve had one hell of a nightmare. It aint real, though. Y’r safe here wit’ me.”

“I see them, all the time.” Where the words were coming from, Spencer didn’t know. He never told people about his nightmares anymore. Not after he’d told Derek that once and the man had actually gone and told Gideon. Since then, Spencer kept his dreams to himself. But curled up tightly here in Remy’s lap, surrounded and protected, the words just came spilling out of him. “We couldn’t save them. We tried, Remy, we did. But we couldn’t save them all.”

“Who, cher?”

Spencer turned his head in a little more and drew in a shaky breath against the skin of Remy’s neck, not even noticing the few tears that escaped. “All the victims. So many victims.” He could see them all, whether he liked it or not. Each crime scene photo, each body, all of them haunting him. “They keep calling to me, grabbing at me. They won’t leave me alone. They, they’re crawling to me, pulling me down, and they won’t, they won’t…” A sob broke his words and Remy instantly started to shush him. He brought Spencer impossibly closer and kept shushing him as he rocked. “No one’s gonna get y’ here, Penny. Dere’s just y’ and me and we’re okay in here. I won’t let anyone get y’.”

Wrapped up in the last dregs of his nightmare and in the comfort being offered him, Spencer never noticed as Logan came to the still open bedroom door. A look was exchanged between Logan and Remy and then the feral man backed away and quietly shut the door for them. That left Remy free to turn his whole attention to calming Spencer down. He stroked over him, the feel of his hands helping to chase away the chilled feeling on Spencer's skin, and he rocked him there, giving the only comfort he could think of to give. It was plenty enough for Spencer. It was perfect. He felt completely wrapped up by Remy. Body, emotions, the Cajun held him close, and Spencer relaxed in small increments until finally the last of his tension drained away and he slumped down.

Only then did Remy shift their position at all. But it wasn’t to detach them. Instead, he laid them both down, spooning his body around Spencer's protectively so that Spencer's back was pressed to Remy’s front and he could wrap his arm around him and hold him in close. Then he pulled the blankets over them. There, Spencer felt secure and protected and, his cheeks flushed a little with it, he felt cherished. Like he was something precious worth protecting.

It was easier for him to lay like this. He could take the comfort of Remy’s embrace while not having to look the man in the eye. As Remy nuzzled in at the back of his neck, Spencer caught hold of the hand that was pressing over his heart and he laced their fingers together before cradling Remy’s hand to him. He didn’t really think about it as he drew up their joined hands and lightly kissed Remy’s knuckles. The gesture seemed both normal and natural. “Sorry.”

“Hush. Y’ aint gotta apologize to me.” Remy murmured into his hair.

“I just…I have nightmares, sometimes. Well, a lot of times.” Sighing, Spencer kept his eyes open, staring down at their joined hands so that he wouldn’t have to close his eyes and see the remnants of his dream. “Sometimes I dream memories. Sometimes I, I dream about the victims, the ones we…we couldn’t save.” His voice caught a little and a small shudder ran down him. “They call out to me, asking why I didn’t help them, and they try to, to grab at m-me, and I can’t get away f-from them.”

Remy shushed him, kissing the back of his neck in a way that was far from sexual and worked to help soothe him back down enough that he got his breathing under control once more. When he did, he blew out a shaky breath and continued on, his voice just a little steadier. “I haven’t had one like that for a while now,” not since he’d been sleeping with Remy, “and the only thing I could think of was getting in here to you.”

A low hum sounded behind him. “I’m glad y’ came to me.”

“I didn’t even think about it. I just, I woke up and I needed to, to be safe.”

He felt how pleased his words made Remy. The man’s hold shifted until he was better situated against Spencer's back. “I’ll always do anyt’ing I can to keep y’ safe.”

Feeling the honesty in that and drawing a bit of bravery from it, Spencer dared to ask “Even if it means sharing a bed often? I…having you there, it seems to, uh, to make the nightmares sort of _go away_.”

Remy’s pleased sensation grew even stronger and Spencer swore there was a hint of pride mixed in there as well. “I’ll share a bed wit’ y’ always, Penny. I’ll hold y’ every night if dat’s what it takes.”

“Even when you’re mad at me?”

The soft whisper slipped out before Spencer could stop it. He felt Remy tense behind him for just a moment. Then his hair was ruffled as the Cajun let out a deep sigh. “Even if I’m mad at y’.” He promised. Then, “But I wasn’t really mad at y’, cher. I was mad at de situation, at all dis shit, _mais_ not y’, not really. Y’ just got more of it dan anyone else cause y’ was dere.”

“I didn’t mean for this to happen to you.” Spencer whispered. “I didn’t want you to have to choose between the two of us. I didn’t want to hurt either one of you.”

“Ah, Penny, y’ didn’t. Y’ didn’t _make me_ choose and y’ didn’t do anyt’ing to hurt us.” Remy lifted their joined hands and brushed his thumb lightly over the bruise on Spencer's face. “Y’ was de one dat got hurt here.”

But Spencer was already shaking his head. “I deserved that. All her issues aside, she _is_ hurting, Remy. She’s hurt and confused and angry and she needed somewhere to let it out. I should’ve realized that and not let my own temper flare up at her words. She’s a good person, I can feel that. There’s no evil in her. She’s just…” His attention turned inward, his nightmare forgotten as he focused wholly on this problem, on what he’d felt from Rogue earlier. “She’s so confused and mixed up. And she’s scared. She always feels so scared to me. But I don’t think she knows how to handle it. So she lashes out with temper because it’s so much safer than fear, you know? It’s the whole mentality of ‘I’ll hurt you before you can hurt me’. Too many people have hurt her and she’s never really healed inside, I don’t think. Until she does, she’ll never really be able to get close to anyone.”

Caught up in what he was saying, he didn’t pay much attention to the stunned feeling from Remy. The Cajun could only lie there at first and marvel at the description that seemed to so accurately fit a woman he’d thought he’d understood and which seemed to explain so much about her. “Is dat de profiler in y’, or de empath, or de healer talkin?”

“All three.” Spencer said easily. “They’re all parts of me. I don’t really separate them. And all those parts wish there was a way to help her. I just, I don’t think she’d let me.” He broke off when a yawn stretched his mouth wide. Comfortable as he was, his body was starting to urge him to go back to sleep.

“Y’r a good soul, Spencer Reid.” Remy murmured to him. He brought their hands back to rest over Spencer's heart and he kissed the back of his neck once more. “Y’ aint gonna solve de problems of de world in de middle of de night. Why don’t y’ just rest fo’ a while? We got training in de morning. De rest of dis, it can keep.”

That sounded like a good idea. Spencer snuggled back against the warm body behind him and gave a soft sigh of contentment. It was ridiculously easy to push away the fear from his nightmare as well as any thoughts of Rogue or anyone else. Here, in Remy’s arms, he could just let go of all of it and know that he would be safe and cared for. Remy would watch out for him and take care of him. There was no need to worry about anything. A small smile graced Spencer's lips as he drifted off to sleep.


	24. Chapter 24

A part of Spencer had privately thought that all the complaints he’d heard about training sessions with Scott were all just exaggerations. The kind of complaints that any team had towards their leader. He’d listened to countless members of the house complain and sometimes even whine after they got done training or were about to head in. But inside, a part of him had always thought that it was just the natural human tendency to exaggerate unpleasant things.

By the time Spencer finished his first training session, he knew just how wrong he was.

The first half of the session hadn’t been that bad. At least, not in Spencer's opinion. They’d met up with Scott inside the Danger Room—Remy surprisingly alert and Spencer still fighting to get his sleepy body to finish waking up with only the single cup of coffee he’d had time for—and Scott had proceeded to tell them what they’d be doing first.

“Here’s what we’re going to do.” He’d told them. “I’ve seen how well you two move together and work together in your day to day life. You have this way of seeming to anticipate what the other person needs, even for the smallest things. Like passing something to the other one without it having to be asked for. Just, little things like that. Well, we’re going to test to see how well the two of you truly can work together.”

Spencer and Remy exchanged a worried look.

Seeing it, Scott grinned. He looked over to Remy. “I’ve already seen how much Spencer trusts you to have his back. We need you to get to the point that you trust him to have yours. With that in mind, I’m going to have the two of you run through a basic obstacle course I’ve programed in.” Pausing, he reached down into his pocket and pulled out a long black strip of cloth, grinning as he held it out to Remy. “Oh, and you’ll be blindfolded.”

While not exactly the most fun in the world, the two men had managed to make it work surprisingly well. Not just surprising to them, either, but to Scott as well. One run through the course and the man had declared that obviously they had that already well worked out and that maybe he needed to rethink that part of things.

Then, he moved on to the second part of things.

This part of their training was to help them find a way to control Remy’s primal urge to defend. Instead of just furiously lashing out and trying to get Spencer to safety—while taking down anyone that got in the way—Scott wanted to see if they could find a way to help Remy gain a bit more control so that he could react appropriately. Retreat wasn’t always the smart option. Neither was killing or maiming anyone in the way. And if they were with others, it could be extremely dangerous for Remy to just abandon everything to come defend Spencer, potentially leaving teammates undefended. The plan was to either get Remy to learn how to control this and think more clearly, or for Spencer to learn how to use the bond to calm Remy down quicker than he already did. It all sounded great in theory. At least, until one thought about just _how_ they were going to manage that. Because, to train Remy to control the ‘Protector’ in him, or to train Spencer how to help calm the Protector, they first had to trigger it. And to trigger it…

Spencer wasn’t a fighter. They all knew this. Put him in a fight, especially without his gun, and he stood little chance of winning. Put him in the middle of a simulated a bunch people with guns and attitude who seemed hell-bent on killing them, and, well, they sure as hell got the Protector. A Protector who couldn’t seem to decide if he’d rather hide Spencer somewhere safe, or personally go out and smash any of the bastards who got anywhere near them.

The simulation—and no matter how many times it had been explained to him or how many times he saw it, Spencer still couldn’t help but marvel at the Danger Room—had placed he and Remy inside of an old factory building that was completely surrounded. The goal? “Stay alive.” Scott said smugly.

The damn bastard.

As the program came online, the Danger Room seemingly contracted slightly and in a blink of an eye, Spencer found himself surrounded by the interior of a large factory building. That change from nothing to something was still disorienting to him. The feel of Remy’s hand on his shoulder was the only thing that helped him keep steady. Something of it must’ve shown on his face because Remy gave a soft squeeze and smiled at him. “Y’ get used to it.” He promised softly.

Spencer just nodded. He didn’t want to focus on that. Instead, his eyes started moving around the room they found themselves in, taking in the little details. It was a large space, large enough to contain the trappings of a newspaper press that at one time must have printed the broadsheets daily. A layer of dust lies over everything, giving it an old, definitely abandoned feel to it. Nothing stirs, no rodents, no breeze in the air. With a quick glance around Spencer can tell that this building must be ready to condemn. He wondered how authentic Scott makes these simulations. Do they need to worry about the building falling down around them? “This place doesn’t look up to much.” Spencer murmured in a voice pitched only for Remy.

The Cajun nodded at him though he kept running his own visual check of the room. “He prolly did dat on purpose. Makes it harder to use m’ charge in here.”

“Nice.” The sarcastic word slipped from Spencer and had Remy flashing him a laughing smile.

Done checking over their surroundings, Remy turned himself to face Spencer, his hand still on the younger man’s shoulder. “Listen, cher. Cyke’s gonna be aiming to trigger de Protector. Dat means he’s gonna have set dis whole t’ing up so dat everyt’ing’s probably gonna come after y’.”

“Most likely.” Spencer agreed. He tried not to be nervous about that fact.

“I want y’ to stick close to me in here. It’s easier to keep it calm if y’r close.” That admission looked like it was a little difficult for Remy to make, but he didn’t falter in it. He kept his gaze steady on Spencer, sunglasses already off and put into his pocket so it was easier to see here in the darkened warehouse. “Usually when Scott tells us to just stay alive, it means stay alive until backup gets here. All we gotta do is make it until den.”

It was on the tip of Spencer's tongue to make some sort of snarky response, something to remind Remy that he wasn’t entirely useless and he could at least protect himself a bit. But he held it in and settled for nodding his head. “Let’s find somewhere to hole up, then. I doubt we’ll be safe in this room for long.”

Of course, nothing could go according to plan. They didn’t even get the chance to make it out of their little room. One moment they were standing there talking and the next, the door was slamming open and people were rushing in. Spencer didn’t get a chance to react. His arm was grabbed and he found himself yanked backwards and shoved to the corner of the room. He caught himself against the wall and looked up to see Remy placing himself between Spencer and the group, his Bo already extended and his body in a defensive crouch. The emotions in the bond were bright and hot and practically screamed protectiveness. Pushing off the wall, Spencer held in a curse. The Protector was out in full force right now.

The group of people that came in all seemed to turn towards Spencer, their eyes finding him across the room, and Spencer let out the first of many curses towards Scott when he heard someone call out “There he is! Grab him!”

Spencer only had time for a soft “Shit” before the group rushed straight for him.

CXCX

Son of a bitch. Spencer swore he’d never been so happy to see anything as he was to see the simulation around him fade away. As the warehouse floor gave way to the floor of the Danger Room, Spencer gave up all attempts to get up and he just let himself flop down onto his back. He lay there and just let himself breathe for a moment even as he heard Remy quickly close the distance between them and drop down at his side. Spencer marveled a little at the fact that he wasn’t the least bit bothered by the fact that Remy wasted no time in starting to check him over. He just lay there and let Remy’s hands run over him in what was becoming a familiar check for injuries. It was interesting, the things one could become used to over time. This was starting to become just a natural part of Remy.

A touch to Spencer's arm had him wincing. He looked over, watching as Remy inspected the bruise already growing there. “Odd that a simulation is capable of bruising with the strength of their grip.” Spencer observed. That bruise, he knew, came from when he’d been caught by a few of the guys chasing them and he’d been restrained in his efforts to get to Remy. After that first initial rush at the start of the training session, the duo had managed to escape, but the people kept coming after them. Eight different times the group had caught up with them and managed to either pin them in a room, separate the two of them, or snatch Spencer from Remy. As Spencer had figured at the start, every person they came across in that ‘warehouse’ had all been gunning for him. Apparently Scott’s methods for testing out Remy’s ‘Protector’ and the control that he and Spencer exerted over it was to simply put Spencer in repeated shitty situations. Quick way to get the Protector out, true. Also a quick way to get Spencer covered in quite a few new bruises.

Remy’s hands moved up again, this time heading for Spencer's face, and Spencer reached up to bat his hands away. “We already know my face aches, Remy. It was bruised before we got in here. Let it be.” The bruise from Rogue’s slap was a dull ache today that had grown steadily throughout training. “I’m fine, Rem, really. Achy, but fine.”

“Y’ got a lot of new bruises.” Remy finally spoke, his voice still tense. His emotions were sharp and hot, too, telling Spencer that he was still on guard here. There was also an ache in the bond that told him that he wasn’t the only one that was aching. Spencer didn’t even stop to think about it before reaching out and curling his fingers around Remy’s ankle, the closest part of him that he could reach. A tiny movement of his finger got him underneath Remy’s pant leg and against bare skin. Then all it took was just a soft breath and the healing energy flowed from him to Remy. He let go a second later with a small smile of satisfaction.

Remy, on the other hand, gave him a scowl. “Y’ shouldn’t waste y’r energy healing Remy.”

Tired, sore, and suffering from not enough caffeine this early in the morning, Spencer didn’t have his usual filter. He lifted his hand and made the talking gesture at Remy. Then he let it flop back down and his eyes slipped closed once more. “If you honestly think that I’m ever going to stand beside you and not heal you, even if your injury is nothing more than a tiny scratch, than you’re not as intelligent as I thought you were.”

A snort told him Remy’s opinion of that, followed by a swell of mirth in their bond. “Y’ aint exactly standing beside Remy.”

“Stand, lay, hang upside down. It all equals out the same.”

_“You two all right down there?”_

The voice echoed through the Danger Room, drawing their attention away from one another. It was Scott speaking from up in the Danger Room. The man couldn’t even come down to the room to talk to them. He had to talk from the safety of the control room. Spencer resisted the urge to snort. That was probably a smart idea on Scott’s part. No telling just how protective Remy might get if someone came into the room with them right now. As it was, Remy’s voice was just slightly sharp, not really angry but not exactly friendly, when he called up “What do y’ t’ink?”

 _“I think you haven’t picked him up and carried him off to safety, so he can’t be that bad off.”_ Scott’s voice replied.

Spencer debated for a moment on answering that remark with one finger. In the end, he resisted. Flipping off the boss wasn’t exactly a smart plan. He heard Remy move beside him and wondered if maybe his bondmate was making the gesture for him. They really did mirror one another often enough that it was a distinct possibility. But Spencer didn’t bother opening his eyes to find out. He focused more on his partner’s emotions and that sharp edge that warned him that, calm though he may be acting, Remy was still far too much on edge. Spencer reached a hand over and curled his hand over Remy’s ankle once more. This time his goal wasn’t to heal but to soothe.

“Bite me, Scotty.” Remy called up.

_“Now, now, Gambit. Is that any way to talk to the man in charge of planning your training sessions?”_

“Why don’t y’ come on down here and we’ll talk about dat?”

_“There’s a reason I’m still up here. You think I’m stupid enough to get in striking distance right now while you’re grumpy and overprotective? I’m smart enough to stay the hell away from you at the moment.”_

Even though he could see Remy’s face, it was easy for Spencer to hear the scowl in his words. “ _Fils de putain_.” Remy grumbled lowly. He let out a gusty sigh and shifted a little more towards Spencer. “One card, dat’s all it’d take. Jus’ one card. We’ll see who’d be laughing den, _non_?”

A hint of a smile touched Spencer's lips. He let his eyes opened just slightly and peeked up through his lashes. “Be nice.” He warned Remy, letting his smile grow just a bit. “I’m too tired to be hiding bodies.”

“Ah, well.” Smirking, Remy settled down near Spencer's shoulder, his fingers somehow finding their way to Spencer's hair. “Guess we gotta deal wit’ him, den.”

“We?”

“Psh, _mais oui_. Y’ aint leaving me to deal wit’ de _homme_ on m’own.”

“Wonderful. I suppose you’ll be expecting me to sit up, too.”

“Seems de logical t’ing to do.”

“Ugh.” Spencer opened his eyes the rest of the way so that he could mock-glare at Remy. “You’re so demanding. Why do I keep you around?”

He worried for a half a second that he’d misjudged his teasing, something that was easy to do as he wasn’t really used to indulging in it, but then Remy grinned broadly at him and Spencer felt the man’s amusement bright and clear and he knew he’d done it right. He was deliberately trying to tease Remy despite not being used to doing it. It was working just as Spencer wanted, though, and was calming Remy down little by little. If he’d just left things alone, most likely Remy would’ve been too protective to let anyone even near Spencer. Now he was relaxed and amused by their teasing and his attention was focused on Spencer and their banter. “Fo’ de coffee.” He quipped. “I make a hell of a cup of coffee.”

With the help of Remy’s hands, Spencer pushed up off the ground and got himself up in a seated position, wincing only a little bit. “That you do.”

Scott’s voice interrupted them once more and he sounded vastly amused. _“Are you two done playing yet? There are people who are going to be showing up and wanting the room here in the next few minutes. You might want to clear out before then.”_

“We’re moving, we’re moving. Don’t get y’r panties in a twist.” Remy called up to him. He moved and caught Spencer's hands in his before straightening up. As he rose, he pulled Spencer up with him.

_“You know, I think I’m going to review my plan for this afternoon’s training. There are some things I think I want to add in, just for you, Gambit.”_

“Bring it on, Cyke.”

Spencer completely ignored the two of them. He was on his feet now and the aches he’d felt before were taking a moment to really make themselves known. It wasn’t that bad, really, in the scheme of things. His body just wasn’t used to this kind of training. This feeling reminded him of a few memorable cases at the Bureau, or of being back in high school and coming home after a particularly bad day. Nothing too serious; just enough to make sure he felt it in quite a few places. A warm bath, a meal and some coffee and he’d be good as new.

They’d just reached the door when Scott spoke again, sounding far too amused by everything. _“I’ll review the session and adjusted our training accordingly. You two did great today. I’ll see you both back in here at seven tomorrow morning. And don’t forget you’ve got afternoon sparring with Ororo, Spencer!”_

Spencer just sighed as he left the room. What the hell had he gotten himself in to?

CXCX

So started one very interesting and very exhausting week for Spencer. Over the next seven days he found himself pushed in ways he hadn’t ever been pushed before. Between training sessions with Remy in the mornings, then the usual routine the two men followed to learn about their abilities, and then the afternoon sessions with Ororo while Remy was in his regular training with the others, Spencer was kept busy and moving. Too busy to really think, which was a bonus he quite enjoyed. It kept him from worrying too much about the fight with Rogue, both on his part and on Remy’s. To his surprise, Rogue seemed to be avoiding them just as much as they avoided her. Spencer had no issues admitting to himself that he avoided her as best as he possibly could. The bruise on his face was finally starting to heal and the last thing he wanted was to replace it with another.

Spencer threw himself into these training sessions with a vigor that he’d never showed in his academy training. This was far more important to him, and that was yet another thing he tried not to think on. He just focused on putting his everything into it. In the mornings, he and Remy worked on the two part training sessions that Scott put them through. The first half was always a ‘team building’ exercise, whether it was going through the obstacle course again (still blindfolded, and now Scott was making them do it without talking, communicating only through touch), or tossing them into some situation that required both their skills to find their way out of. The second half was always spent working on trying to find ways to help them both either control the protector in Remy, or learn how to work with it. Doing all of that didn’t just take physical energy. It also took mental energy for them both as they learned how to lean on one another, how to draw from each other, and how to use their inner strength to try and help one another.

In the late afternoon, Spencer threw himself into his sparring sessions with Ororo, determined to learn how to defend himself well enough to at least not be such a liability to his bondmate. Ororo was proving to be one hell of a teacher. She didn’t take it easy on Spencer but she also didn’t demand more of him than he could give.

Night was the only time that Spencer truly got to relax. Ever since the night with Spencer's nightmare, where he’d admitted to Remy that he slept better with him there, the two men had shared a bed. Sharing a bed wasn’t really new to them. They’d done it so many times since bonding together. But this…this was different. Even Spencer, who knew he was oblivious most of the time to things around him, recognized that this was different. They were more relaxed now when they climbed into bed. Neither one of them made any pretenses about it. They didn’t pretend that they were going to sleep apart. They didn’t act embarrassed about it with each other. In this one area, they were on the same page. Sleeping together this way felt right and it felt good. Why bother pretending otherwise? There was no time that Spencer felt safer or more loved than when he was wrapped up tight with Remy in bed. If a small part of him occasionally reminded him that others might view their sleeping arrangements as strange, well, it wasn’t hard to quite that voice.

It was exactly one week after the boys started training together that Logan apparently decided they were working far too hard. “We’re going out.” He announced that night at dinner.

Spencer looked up curiously to see who Logan was talking to and found the man looking at him and Remy. Oh. He meant them? “Us?”

“Yep.” Logan sat back in his chair and gave a sharp grin. “I’m in the mood for a drink or twelve and I’m bored drinking alone, so you’re gonna come entertain me.”

Any hesitation that Spencer might’ve had washed away at the happiness and excitement he felt from Remy at just the suggestion of going out. He knew his bondmate was going a little stir crazy. Maybe this would be the perfect thing to help him relax. It sure couldn’t hurt. Spencer shrugged one shoulder and picked up his mug of coffee. “Sure, why not.” He felt Remy’s surprise and cast a small smile over at the man. “Might be fun. Right?”

“Absolutely.” Remy agreed, grinning broadly.

From further down the table, Scott called out “Mind some extra company? I think it might do a lot of us some good to get out of the house.”

A few faces reflected surprise at the fact that _Scott_ was suggesting they all go out and have a few drinks. Not exactly typical behavior for their straight laced leader. But Logan’s grin just grew. “Why not?”

The mood around the table seemed to pick up a little at that. Spencer actually felt the boost in everyone’s mood. A tension that he’d barely noticed was there was now fading away. Even Rogue, way down at the end sitting by Bobby, looked a little happier at the idea of going out. Spencer saw a few extra smiles from people, heard a bit more laughter, and he felt his own lips curve in response. Huh. Maybe Scott was right. It might do them all a bit of good to get out and have some fun.


	25. Chapter 25

Hanging out with the X-men in public was quite different than hanging out with them back at the mansion. There were a few obvious differences, of course. Remy’s sunglasses never came off, Warren had to put on his harness for his wings before he left the house, Kurt and Hank dressed a little more carefully though they didn’t full on hide. But it didn’t stop them from having fun. Logan ordered the first round of drinks on him and it started the night off on a cheerful note. Tucked in at his table, sitting beside Logan, Spencer looked around at everyone who had come out. Aside from Logan and Remy, there was also Scott, Bishop, Kurt, Warren, Bobby, Rogue, and Hank. It amused Spencer to see that the only girl that had come was Rogue. He’d heard Jean complain about Harry’s often enough that it was no real surprise that she wasn’t coming, and he honestly couldn’t picture Ororo in a place like this. Or, in any bar, really.

Scott dropped down suddenly in the open chair at Spencer's side—Remy was up at the bar, getting more drinks—and he grinned at the genius. “You just plan on hiding out here at a corner table, Spencer?”

Humor danced in Spencer's eyes as he looked at the usually serious field leader. In so many ways, Scott could be uptight and annoying and far too serious. Right at the moment he was more relaxed then Spencer could ever remember seeing since he’d met the man and he was giving a sharp grin almost worthy of the Wolverine. It should’ve worried Spencer a little. That grin could only mean trouble. Instead, he gave a smile of his own. “Did you have something else in mind?”

“Come play some pool with me. No one else wants to play.”

There was a slight flash of something, a hint of emotion that got past Spencer's tight shields, and Logan gave a low snort of amusement. Ah, so it was like that, was it? Spencer tipped his head just a little and let his bangs go over his face. Well, two could play at this game. Spencer's smile became just a little bit shy and he gave a small shrug of his shoulder. “It’s been a while since I’ve played.” He admitted, totally honest. It _had_ been a while.

Scott’s smile turned into a bit of a smirk. “That’s fine. Come on, come play with me.”

“Well, okay…”

The two headed off over to the pool table about the same time that Remy came back with some drinks. The Cajun set the glasses down on the table and cast a curious look over at his bondmate. He could feel Spencer's enjoyment and his humor. “What’s going on over dere?” He asked the table.

Hank, who was on the other side of Logan, laughed lowly. “Our Fearless Leader has found himself a new victim.”

Remy watched as the two men reached the pool table and picked out their cues. He watched as Spencer picked up the cue and held it in hands that looked unsure, which was at total odds with the increase in humor in their bond. “Well, now, dis might be a bit in’eresting.” Remy murmured. He hooked the chair by Logan with his foot and twisted it a bit before dropping down into it. Now he was free to talk with his friends and still be able to watch the pool tables. Something told him this was going to be a fun show to observe.

Money was being placed on the edge of the pool table, under a glass. Logan laughed when he saw it. “You might wanna look out for your boy there, Gumbo. Bad enough One Eye’s got a new victim. You don’t wanna let him fleece the kid, too.”

“Have a little faith, Wolvie.” Rolling his head back to look at Logan, Remy winked. “T’ink m’boy might surprise y’ a lil.”

Most of the people at the mansion had played pool against Scott at one point or another. They’d even been, as they put it, ‘dumb enough’ to come back for seconds. Scott was known for his skill at the table and his ability to hustle pretty much anyone he played. None of them were dumb enough to play when there was money on the table. So when they saw Spencer up there with Scott, the money on the table, they all laughed to one another and shook their heads.

Spencer didn’t really notice it. He was too busy fighting his own amusement. He watched Scott carefully as they played, taking note of the man’s style and form, of the way that he moved around the table. For the first half of the game, Spencer threw most his shots, playing under the pretense of trying to remember how to play the game. They chatted casually as they played, too, a perfect sort of distraction. Just normal, basic things. Scott asked if he’d heard from anyone back home, how his friends were doing, how he was doing. Just little things. And Spencer answered his questions easily. He also watched the way Scott played, studying the man’s skill. He was good. Really good. When it became Spencer's turn, he made sure to keep his shots to the image he was presenting. Someone who played pool only rarely and not very well. It was working, too. He could see on Scott’s face that the man figured he had the game in the bag.

It was the second half of the game that Spencer finally made his move. Each man only had a few balls on the table. When Scott straightened up from his shot, Spencer looked the table over and he saw two different options for himself. One, he could keep playing the way he was, draw this out a little bit and really play up a lack of skill. Or two, he could end this.

One peek at the cocky expression on Scott’s face when he thought Spencer wasn’t looking and the decision became much easier. Using his hair as a screen, Spencer hid his smile when he bent back over the table. Across the room he caught Remy’s eye and gave the man a wink. Then he lined his cue up and took his shot.

A few minutes later, Spencer straightened up for the last time, a smile on his lips. That smile grew when he looked at Scott’s amused and surprised expression. “Well, hell.” Scott said.

Spencer let out a low laugh. He scooped the money off the side of the table, thumbing through it quickly to count out the bills. “You play well, Scott.”

“Yeah, you too. You little shit.”

Amusement turned just slightly smug. “Pick your mark better next time.”

The crowd nearby shifted and Spencer's attention was drawn away before Scott could form a reply. Three guys broke free from their friends and one of them was moving right over towards them. The guy was close in height to Spencer, but he was built more like Derek, and Spencer was smart enough to angle himself a little more towards Scott. Safety in numbers, after all. But the guy wasn’t looking to cause trouble. He stopped beside the table and flashed the two of them a grin. “You two just finish your game?” He asked, eyeing the cash in Spencer's hand.

Spencer and Scott exchanged a quick look and Spencer projected a bit of reassurance towards Scott when he felt his worry. Then he looked back over to the new guy. “We did. Were you looking to use the table?”

“Looking for a good game. How much to play?”

Now this could prove to be fun. It’s been a while since Spencer's done this with anyone but friends. He knows he should just politely decline, walk away and go enjoy his time with his friends, but there’s a bit of a devil in him that wants to play. He debates it for just a little too long and the guy’s smile turns to a smirk. “What, kid? Afraid of a little challenge?”

Those were the magic words. Spencer pushed back his automatic annoyance and made himself smile shyly at the man. “Let’s play.”

CXCX

Back over at the tables, Remy caught the comment and he felt Spencer's annoyance flare at that. Laughing, he shook his head, already knowing how this was going to go. Sure enough, Spencer was laying money down on the table a moment later, as was the new guy, and the two were starting their game as Scott made his way over to their table to join them in their watching and drinking. He took a seat beside Warren, who had joined them right before Scott and Spencer had finished their game. Scott was smirking when he dropped into his chair. He mock scowled over at Remy. “You could’ve warned me.”

Remy didn’t even bother to pretend to not know what he was talking about. He leaned back in his chair, kicking his feet up on a nearby empty chair, and he smirked as he lit a cigarette. “An ruin his fun?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.”

“Aw, getting grumpy there, Cyke?” Logan taunted him. “What, can’t stand that the _kid_ beat ya at your own game?”

Conversation around the table dissolved into good natured bickering. Remy tuned it out and turned his attention over towards Spencer. The one place his attention always seemed to wander back to. It was no real hardship to watch the man as he moved around the table and bent here and there to take his shots. More and more often, Remy found himself admiring that slender form as it moved. A form that he was starting to know as well as he knew his own. He and Spencer had been getting closer this past week. Learning how to work together under Scott’s tutelage had seemed to strengthen their bond. The two were becoming closer than ever and with that closeness seemed to come a few other things that Remy hadn’t quite let himself think about yet. One of those things seemed to be this appreciation for watching Spencer. He’d admired the man’s attractiveness before this. He’d just always pushed it away. Now it seemed to sit there, all the time, a constant thing each time he looked at him. Not overpowering or anything. Just…there. Always there.

He wasn’t unaware of Spencer's appreciation for him, either. That had been there from the get go. Remy was used to that, though. He was used to people looking at him and finding him attractive. That was just normal. What sort of threw him sometimes, what he didn’t really have much experience handling, was that Spencer seemed to show he was more attracted to Remy when they were just sitting around and talking. It was like the genius was more attracted to _him_ than he was to his body. That was a new concept for Remy and one he didn’t quite know what to do with. Yet it warmed him inside. Who wouldn’t be flattered by something like that?

A burst of amusement and satisfaction pulled Remy from his thoughts. He hadn’t realized just how lost in them he’d become. When he blinked his eyes to clear them, he saw Spencer straightening up from a now empty table and smiling at his opponent.

The guy wasn’t smiling back. A scowl touched his lips and had Remy sitting just a little more alert. “You were lucky.” The man growled out, his voice just loud enough to reach the table here. “Double or nothing.”

Spencer's eyes flickered briefly over to Remy and the others and then back to the guy. He shrugged one shoulder casually. “I’ve got time for one more game, I guess. But then I really should get back to my friends. I didn’t come here to spend the whole evening away from them.” With that, he was very clearly letting it be known that he wasn’t alone. Spencer was no fool. He’d sized up his opponent and he knew that there was the risk for trouble if he won again. At least, so long as he was alone. But guys like this tended to be a lot of bluster if they knew that the scrawny guy wasn’t alone.

Remy wasn’t the only one to have noticed what was going on. A big hand clapped on Remy’s shoulder, keeping him in place as his feral friend rose up from the table. Logan helped matters perfectly by going to pass by the pool tables and calling out. “Hey, brat! You need a refill?”

Looking up, Spencer smiled and nodded. “Yes, please.”

The guy and his buddies didn’t really pay any attention to that until Logan came over to the table to bring Spencer a fresh glass. Then they looked up and did a bit of a double take. Logan clearly had the look of a brawler to him for anyone to see. Off to the sidelines, Remy smothered a snicker. Scott had a sharp grin on his lips. “He’s done this before.” He said.

“What do you mean?” Bobby asked curiously. He looked from the group back over to Scott.

Scott gestured with his glass towards the group now playing their pool game. “Spencer knows he’s small and he knows people would see him as an easy mark to beat up to get their cash back. If he wins a second game, it’s likely they’ll get pissed and want to take it out on him. By letting them know he’s not alone, and with Logan going up to act growly and show his muscles a little, he’s pretty much made sure they’ll think long and hard before trying to start anything with him. Plus, they’ll watch Logan, see him come back over to us, and know that Spencer has even more people on his side.”

“A Fed that’s a con man. How surprising.” Warren said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. Still, the words didn’t hold any real bite to them.

That had Remy’s snicker turning into a full blown laugh. “A good one, too, _mon ami_.”

“I didn’t picture him the type.” Bobby said.

Logan had just returned to their table by then and he let out a snort at Bobby’s words. “Ya kidding me, Icecube? The kid grew up in _Vegas_ and then spent a few years going to college near _LA_. Don’t let that innocent face of his fool ya. The kid’s a hustler at heart.”

That had everyone laughing. Even Warren and Bishop both chuckled, and those two were two of the ones still slightly hesitant around Spencer. It wasn’t that they didn’t like him, at least not that Remy could see. They just took longer to warm up to people than the rest of them did. At least they weren’t rude to him. Remy had worried about that at first. It was no secret that neither man would never be a part of Remy’s fan club. He’d worried that they’d take it out on Spencer; that he’d be considered guilty by association. Luckily, while they treated him coolly, or avoided him, they weren’t outright rude to him. Not that anyone could be once they got to talking with him. There was just something about Spencer's shy awkwardness that made it difficult to be rude. You kind of felt like you were kicking a puppy.

The game up at the table was wrapping up. Remy saw that Spencer had just two balls left and he could see that his bondmate wasn’t messing around anymore. He was eager to end the game. One shot and then Spencer was straightening up and giving that shy smile of his to his opponent. Remy kept a careful watch here, ready to move over and help the instant Spencer showed any signs of needing it, but it didn’t end up being necessary. After a moment’s conversation that Remy couldn’t hear, Spencer picked up the money and started to make his way over to them. Remy pulled his legs off the extra chair in just enough time for Spencer to drop down into it. A mischievous light danced in Spencer's eyes and his lips curved up. In that moment, he looked like the little imp that Remy often called him.

Remy couldn’t help but laugh at him. “Having fun, Imp?”

“It’s been a while since I’ve had the chance to play pool.” Spencer said happily. He folded the cash in his hand and leaned forward, surprising a few of the others by reaching out and slipping the money into Remy’s coat pocket.

“Won’t your friends play with you anymore?” Hank asked him in a teasing voice.

Spencer smiled even as his cheeks heated a little. “Rossi does, occasionally. He’s a pretty good pool player.”

“You hustle him, too?” Scott asked. His lips were quirked up slightly in that amused smirk of his. He sat back in his chair, eyeing Spencer overtop his beer.

Lifting up his own glass, Spencer bit his lip for a second and Remy felt his momentary hesitation as he probably tried to debate just how upset Scott really was. He must’ve decided that there was no worry because his indecision melted away and a smile took its place. “As often as I can.” He admitted, making the table laugh. “Rossi’s determined to see if he can figure out all my ‘tricks’, as he puts it. He’s one of the only ones that will still play cards with me, too. The others refuse.”

Bishop leaned forward a little, finally joining in the conversation here. “Why?”

The laughter around the table grew a little when Spencer flushed and looked down. Scott was the one to answer the question for him. “He probably cheats worse than Remy does. Hell, with your brain, you can probably count cards as easy as breathing. Remind me never to play poker with the two of you.”

“Like you never cheat.” Warren threw out.

Scott lifted a hand and laid it over his heart. “I would never! How could you suggest it, War?”

“Yeah, uh huh.” Warren snorted at him an shook his head. “Pull the other leg, Scott.”

Ignoring everyone’s laughter, Scott mock glared at him. “For that cheek, you can go get the next round of drinks.”

There was some good natured grumbling, but Warren still ended up getting up. Surprisingly, though, Spencer rose as well. “I’ll give you a hand.” He offered. Warren raised his eyebrows and gave Spencer a funny look, but he didn’t stop him from going with him. Remy watched the two start to make their way over towards the bar together. When they reached the bar, they stood side by side, and Remy could see Spencer angle himself towards the other man. Even without being able to feel Spencer's concern, Remy still would’ve been able to tell that something was worrying the man. It was there in the way he leaned a little towards Warren, something he didn’t typically do, and in way he moved his hands in low movements instead of his usual expansive gestures.

“Everything okay?”

The low question snapped Remy’s eyes away from the pair at the bar and over to Scott. The man had scooted just a little closer to Remy and he’d pitched his voice low, keeping his question mostly private. A look at the rest of the table showed them in a debate about something—football, from the sounds of it. Remy brought his gaze back over to Spencer and Warren. “Spencer's jus’ a lil worried bout somet’ing, dat’s all.” Remy paused and debated for a second. He didn’t often comment on these things, not wanting to invade someone’s privacy too much. Finally he gave a mental shrug and added “He’s talking to Warren bout somet’ing dat’s got him worried.”

“You think there’s something wrong between the two?” Scott turned now too, looking over at the pair.

Remy shook his head. “ _Non_. Warren, he aint felt dat happy lately. Dere’s somet’ing dat’s upsetting him. I t’ink Spencer just wants to make sure he’s okay. He don’t like feeling people hurt.”

“It can’t be easy to constantly have to feel what everyone around you is feeling.”

“It’s hard on him.” Remy admitted. “I don’t know if it’s de empath or de healer in him, _mais_ he can’t stand seeing someone upset or hurt wit’out wanting to help. He just…he sees t’ings wrong wit’ people, de way dey feel, and he just can’t help but try an fix em.”

“He’s got a big heart.” Scott said softly.

Watching his partner start back towards the table with a now smiling Warren at his side, Remy felt warmth grow around his heart. “ _Oui_ , he does.”

CXCX

This evening was turning out to be a great idea. Spencer was more relaxed than he had been for quite a while. Not even the aches and bruises he carried from his training sessions were bothering him right now. He felt happy and content here in his chair at the table with a group that he was gradually becoming rather close with. It wasn’t the closeness of his friendships back home, true. But he and the team had been through a lot to reach the level of closeness he had with them. Time would bring a closeness with the people here around the table. For now, Spencer was content to start building the friendships.

Though he’d only had a couple drinks, there was a pleasing warmth spreading through Spencer. He watched as Remy finished off the last of his beer and wondered in the back of his mind if maybe their ability to feel one another so strongly meant that he might actually be feeling some of Remy’s drink as well as his own. That was an interesting question. If Spencer stayed sober and Remy got drunk, would Spencer feel it too? He made a mental note to talk to Hank about that at another time. No need to ruin the relaxed air around them right now with questions like that. He just let himself enjoy the evening until Scott finally called out that it was time for everyone to head back.

Remy went with Scott to go pay the tab while the others made their way out of the bar. Spencer waited close to the entrance for them. The warmth from the alcohol had grown a little and Spencer could actually feel his cheeks flushing from it. He leaned against the wall by the door and let his eyes drift through the crowd until he found his partner. There was something there, something in their bond that kept calling for his attention.

He watched as the two finished paying. What was this strange feeling? It bugged Spencer enough that he kept his eyes locked on his bondmate, watching as Remy worked his way through the crowded room, exchanging words with people as he passed them. There was the random smile and wink mixed in with the Cajun’s trademark flirting and yet Spencer noticed just how many heads were turning as Remy neared another group of people. This didn’t quite look right. Something was off about it; the changes in body language, the way both sexes were unconsciously moving closer to him, the eyes focused on him, his body, his smile, his lips... Spencer found himself slowly becoming on guard, the pleasant haze of alcohol starting to fade as his worry grew at the way the tension in the room appeared to be rising so rapidly. Spencer found himself wanting to grab Remy and yank him close. A part deep inside wanted to march in and grab him and snarl at the people who dared to look at him like that.

Somehow he managed to keep enough control to stop from doing that. However, he did reach out with his empathy, cooling the fires flaring around the room, dropping the tension back to the level it had been at before Remy had left his side. But he didn’t let his guard down. He watched intently, constantly assessing the situation until Remy was once again at his side. Then, and only then, did he relax and breathe a sigh of relief.

Spencer didn’t mention anything about it to Remy or Logan or any of the others. His friends were busy chatting away, talking and laughing, and Spencer didn’t want to disturb it with this formless sense of worry that was in him. Maybe it was just the alcohol in him. This _was_ the first time he’d really drank since he’d been bonded. Maybe the strangeness and the warmth he felt was just a side effect of not only his drinking but Remy’s as well. Maybe. He hoped so.

They clambered into Logan’s truck and joined the rest of the convoy to head back to the mansion. Bobby was riding with them, taking up the passenger’s seat, while Spencer and Remy took the back of the cab. The other three kept up a steady conversation the whole ride home. Spencer just watched them, still trying to place this feeling. That strangeness in the bond grew a little more and Spencer found himself analyzing it. It wasn’t a _bad_ feeling. Like he’d felt before, it was warm. Very warm. There was another kind of heat there, though, that had grown a little from before and Spencer took quite a bit to finally place it. When he did, he had to fight a blush. It was _lust._

Oh. Well, hell. That would explain the warmth. Spencer dropped his head and let his hair screen his face. In a better frame of mind he would’ve recognized the emotion much sooner. Now that he knew what it was, he tried to ignore it. He didn’t really need to think about Remy being horny. He fought to pull his shields up a little higher until he didn’t have to feel it anymore.

It didn’t clue in for Spencer that it was more than Remy just being horny until they reached the mansion. That was when he started to notice some other things that told him that maybe there was more going on than he’d thought.

The cars were parked and everyone was unloading from them. Spencer stood beside the car, watching as Remy slid out, his body seeming almost boneless. The way that he moved really shouldn’t be legal. He just sort of flowed from one place to the next. It had Spencer's throat going a little dry. He’d always found Remy attractive but he’d managed to keep it under control. The way the man was moving now wasn’t helping him with that control.

That was when Spencer noticed the first thing that clued him in to something being wrong. IT wasn’t just him that was watching Remy like they couldn’t help themselves. Logan kept sneaking glances at him. The feral lifted his chin and…did he just scent the air? Spencer watched as he did it again and realized that, yes, Logan was sniffing like he was trying to catch some scent. His eyes were on Remy the whole time, too. What the hell?

Spencer looked around, glancing at the others to see if they might have some clue as to what was going on. What he found surprised him. Everyone was watching Remy. _Everyone_. All their eyes were on him as the man stretched his arms over his head. Bobby’s gaze clearly landed on the strip of skin that showed as Remy’s shirt lifted with his stretch. Even Scott was watching, his hands clenching slightly at his sides. What the hell was going on here?

Carefully, hesitantly, Spencer lowered his shields, intending on just testing the air around him. What he found almost knocked him off his feet. Lust, thick and heavy, filled the air like smoke so that one couldn’t breathe without drawing it in. And in a flash, Spencer knew what this was, though he’d only heard about it before now—Remy’s charm.

Spencer didn’t even stop to think about it before he pushed out with his shield. More and more his and Remy’s shields seemed to be fusing together in some ways. They could raise or lower them individually, but they were getting tied together in ways they didn’t even seem to understand. This was one of those moments. Spencer reached out just as Remy had done for him when he’d lost his shields and he used his own strength to wrap around the man. Just a breath later and he was shielding Remy, holding his charm inside for him so that it no longer linked. Unfortunately, it had a startling side effect.

Lust hit Spencer, hard and hot, a jolt through his whole body that turned into a wildfire. There was no way he could stop the sucked in breath, or the low, moaned “ _God_ ” that tore past his lips in a voice gone husky. He was suddenly, agonizingly, achingly hard and beyond grateful that the jacket he wore would cover that.

“Stretch?” Logan’s deep voice broke into Spencer's thoughts, the worry obvious.

There was a soft sound that told Spencer that someone was stepping towards him and he quickly held a hand up, palm out. “Just a minute.” That was all he could manage to get out, the best he could do, and the words still held a definite husky sound to them. God, _God_! It was taking every ounce of willpower Spencer possessed to keep from grabbing Remy and jumping him right here and now without a care to who was watching them. Remy’s charm power filled him, undiluted lust racing through his body, and he had to do something, _fast_ , before he did something they’d regret later. Spencer gathered as much strength as he could and he forced his focus inwards on their shields. A little twist here, a change there, and…his whole body slumped in relief as he penned Remy’s charm safely away. Thank you God.

He blinked open his eyes and found everyone staring at him. It wasn’t the others that Spencer's attention was on, though. It was Remy. Even with Remy’s charm penned safely back, there was still a part of Spencer that felt it. It was in their bond and there was no way he could block or ignore their bond. But that was just an echo of it, the echo that Remy himself felt, and it was nothing like being hit directly with Remy’s charm power. Yet it was just enough that he knew his eyes would be dilated with lust and his body was still hard. Remy was looking at him, eyes raking over him, taking in all the signs of Spencer's arousal, and Spencer felt Remy’s own arousal grow with what he saw. Aw, shit. They needed to get the hell out of here and away from other people before they embarrassed themselves. Maybe away from each other, too.

“We’ll see y’all in de morning.” Remy said suddenly, his voice just slightly lower and raspier than Spencer had ever heard it before. The sound sent a shiver down his spine.

Spencer moved on autopilot, following Remy inside the mansion and over the familiar pathway to their rooms. He wasn’t that surprised when Remy bypassed his own room and went to Spencer's. They spent quite a bit of time in here. Spencer had the private bath and they enjoyed taking advantage of that in the morning. Right now, Spencer couldn’t help but wonder if it might be a bad idea for them to be alone like this. That arousal still ran through them both, stronger than it ever had before. Spencer had almost grown used to it being there as an undercurrent in most things they did. But out in the open like this, so damn strong, he had no idea what would happen.

It looked like Remy didn’t know either. He stood in the middle of the room just watching Spencer. His eyes were uncovered now, the sunglasses gone somewhere, and he made no effort to hide his staring. It should’ve made Spencer uncomfortable, but it didn’t. God, it was wonderful. He felt himself shiver underneath that heated gaze.

Spencer didn’t realize that he was moving forward, actually going towards Remy, until he stumbled slightly over something on the floor. Remy reacted as always and darted out to catch him and that was it for them both. The minute Remy’s hands touched him, the control Spencer had over his shields, over the shield that held back the charm, wavered and almost vanished completely. The charm slammed into him with the force of a freight train and Spencer couldn’t keep the low moan from falling past his lips. The heat of Remy’s hands on his hips burned through him and he found his own hands catching at Remy’s arms, clenching down in his jacket. A shudder ran down Spencer's body. He dropped his head down so that his forehead pressed against Remy’s shoulder. Lust burned bright in him than it ever had before. “Oh, _fuck_.”

A sharp gasp from Remy and a surge of arousal had Spencer lifting his head. Remy’s fingers dug into his hips and he yanked them close together. Twin moans echoed in the room as hard met hard. Spencer met those devil eyes one last time. There was no telling who moved first, who was the one to finally lean in, but Spencer swore the world stopped when their lips connected. The heat inside seemed to roar up and their bond was singing, a symphony of sensations like nothing they’d ever felt before. No kiss had ever been like this. Nothing had ever felt this good. They pressed together until there wasn’t room for a breath between them. They clung, hands moving to grab and hold, their bodies seeking to get as close as humanly possible while the bond was pulsing more and more, drawing in their emotions and playing them over until they couldn’t tell who felt what and it didn’t even matter. They wanted only to get closer. To climb inside of one another and connect themselves in every way possible. Emotionally, mentally, physically. The need to be one was as strong as the lust that still burned through their insides.

Loud banging on their door broke through their moment. Spencer heard it and a part of him knew he should answer it. He should answer that voice that shouted out to them.

It took every ounce of self-control Spencer had ever possessed to make himself jerk back and out of Remy’s touch. If Remy had tried to stop him, he never would’ve succeeded. Luckily, Remy seemed to be of the same mind and he too had jerked back. Spencer didn’t stop until he felt the wall at his back. Looking up, he saw Remy had done the same. The Cajun was on the opposite side of the room, pressed back against the wall the same that Spencer was. They were both panting as they stared at one another.

Another bang on the door had their eyes snapping over towards it. This time they were finally clearheaded enough to recognize the voice on the other side as belong to Logan. “You two all right in there?” Logan called out sharply.

The growl to his words suggested it wasn’t the first time he’d said it and clearly warned them that they better answer before he decided to take action. Remy was the one to recover his voice first. “We’re fine, Logan!”

“Everything’s okay.” Spencer called out as well, adding his own voice in so Logan wouldn’t worry.

There was a moment of quiet before they finally heard Logan’s footsteps heading away from the room. Only then did the two dare to look at one another once more. They stood there for a few long minutes while they tried to get their breathing and their bodies under control once more. Eventually, Remy drew in a shaky breath. “I’m gonna go hop in de shower.” He announced.

Spencer fought back the moan at the image that presented in his mind. He swallowed down the lump in his throat and nodded jerkily. That was probably a good idea. Get them apart for a bit.

Another pause and then Remy made his way over to the bathroom door. But, when he reached the door, he stopped for a moment, hand resting on the frame. Once more his eyes sought out Spencer across the room. The heat was still in them and it stole Spencer's breath away and pinned him in place. He couldn’t even look away from that heat or the intensity. “Remy?”

“I do want y’, Spencer.” Remy said that as casually as if he were stating that the sky was blue. There was nothing but honesty in his words. “I’ve wanted y’ from de start. But y’r too important to risk on a quick fuck brought on by m’ charm. When we do dis, I want y’ clear headed, able to say _oui_ or _non_. Not overwhelmed cause m’ charm is pulling y’ in.”

Oh sweet God. He noted how Remy said _when,_ not _if_ , and the heat pooled in his gut again. Spencer swallowed against the lump that had built once more in his throat. “I want you too.” He admitted, knowing that Remy knew this but needing to give the man the words just as Remy had given the words to him. They had honesty between them. That was something they’d maintained for a while now. Spencer made himself give it now. “But you’re important to me, too. I want you to want me because of more than your charm, and I don’t want to be a rebound. I want you to come to me for me, not because you’re still hurting from her.”

The words made Remy flinch, but he nodded and there was understanding on his face.

Quiet fell over the room. Neither man said anything else; there wasn’t anything more to say. Remy gave Spencer one final look, blew out a breath, and then turned and shut himself in the bathroom. Spencer stayed frozen in place until he heard the shower turn on. Only then did he let himself sink straight down to the floor. “Holy shit.” He breathed out. He pressed one hand flat against his stomach and tried to draw in a straight breath. He needed to meditate, now, and purge out not only his own lust, but the lust he’d picked up from the others and the lust that was Remy’s that still burned inside of him. If he didn’t, there was no way in hell they were going to be able to get any sleep tonight. So he drew himself in, crossing his legs and settling his body into position right here against the wall, and he did everything possible to clear his thoughts and not think about the warm, wet body showering in the next room.


	26. Chapter 26

The first thing Spencer noticed as he started to make that slow slide from sleep to wakefulness was that there was something warm spread out underneath him. A very familiar something. Spencer's lips curved up into a sleepy little smile and he happily snuggled in against that warmth. He was lying stretched out against Remy’s side, one leg nestled between Remy’s legs, his upper half lying draped over Remy’s chest. He’d basically pinned the other man down. Feeling Remy’s body over, under or beside him was something that had become quite natural for him. It had also quickly become one of his favorite parts of the day. Here, wrapped together in bed, they let themselves forget about everything else. Here, they lost the boundaries that they had during the day. The teams, their friends, the worries about the bond, their worries about the future, worries about Rogue —all of those things were left out of their bed first thing in the morning. This time of day was theirs, just for Spencer and Remy, no one else.

Remy shifted underneath Spencer, giving a soft little murmur of sleepy sound. His arms moved around Spencer and drew him in just a little bit closer. One arm held Spencer close, pressed against his back and fingers twined loosely in his hair, and his other arm was stretched over to clasp at Spencer's hip like he was trying to hold him in place. Still half asleep, Spencer gave a happy little hum at the feel of their bodies sliding together, even through the layer of clothes. He wasn’t the only one to enjoy the movement if the hard flesh pressed against his hip was anything to judge by. Not that he was in any better condition. He was pressed up against Remy’s hip as well and the slightest movement created a delicious friction that had him wanting to hum softly again. The world was sort of soft and fuzzy around him. Sleep was still hanging over him like a fog and Remy’s sleepy feelings were in the bond, making everything just a little fuzzier, and the feel of their bodies rubbing together just gave an extra layer of heat to the whole thing, a lazy sort of passion.

He nuzzled his nose in against the chest in front of him and wished absently that there wasn’t a shirt in the way. He’d sort of gotten used to bare skin.

A bit of the fuzziness faded out of the bond as Remy drew up towards wakefulness. His body was reacting before his mind was fully awake. The arms around Spencer tightened, holding him in place while Remy’s hips rolled just a bit, rubbing them together in a slow, sensuous slide that succeeded in finally drawing a little moan from Spencer.

That moan seemed to bring Remy the rest of the way awake. His arms moved, but didn’t pull away. Instead, his hands splayed over Spencer's back, slipping down underneath the material of his shirt to slide over his skin, fingers tracing the bumps along his spine. Spencer arched up into the touch like a cat and gave another happy little hum.

“Hell of a way to wake up.” Remy murmured, his voice still raspy with sleep.

“Mmm.”

A soft laugh vibrated Remy’s chest against Spencer's cheek. His body shifted a little and Spencer felt as he drew in a deep breath. Then, “Y’ better go on and grab y’r shower, petit. We got training in half an hour.”

Oh, ugh. They were really going to train this morning? Spencer had thought that going out last night would mean that they wouldn’t have to train today. Everyone had drank quite a bit last night. Wouldn’t they all want to sleep in today?

Remy once more showed his ability to somehow know exactly what it was Spencer was thinking. He chuckled again and gave Spencer a small squeeze. “A night drinking aint on excuse fo’ missing out on training. Not in Scotty’s books.” Twisting his hands a bit, Remy scratched his nails down Spencer's spine, smiling at the way Spencer hissed and arched up into the touch, and then slid them out the bottom of his shirt. With one hand he patted Spencer's backside. “C’mon now, cher. Up an at em.”

There was no way he was going to be able to go back to sleep now, or get back into that peaceful place he’d just been in. Remy wasn’t going to let him. Spencer felt the pout settling on his lips, but he gave in and pushed up off the bed. He was still half asleep as he rose to his feet beside the bed and stretched his arms up above his head while yawning. A soft groan from the bed had him giving a self-satisfied smirk. Good. Served him right. Still smirking, he headed towards the bathroom.

“Brat.” Remy called out to him. “Y’r a damn tease when y’r too sleepy to be self-conscious, y’ know dat?”

Stopping in the bathroom doorway, Spencer turned around and nodded, still smiling. When he saw Remy, though, he found himself unable to turn away. He stood there for a moment and simply looked at the beauty lying in his bed. How the hell was a man supposed to walk away from _that_? Remy had his hands folded behind his head and was resting back against the pillows. His eyes were mostly closed, just a hint of red peeking out from underneath long lashes, while those sinful lips were curved just slightly in a tiny smile that somehow managed to be both pleased and smug, and his whole face was made even more attractive by the long, sleep tousled locks that framed it. And his body… _God_ , his body. Remy had absolutely no shame with it. His shirt was still riding up from where it had moved when Spencer rose, showing off a bit of that washboard stomach that Spencer wanted to run his tongue over and trace through every dip and line he could find. He wanted to follow that small strip of hair that vanished into the top of those low riding pajama pants. Judging by the tent the man was unashamedly sporting, it’d be a hell of a prize he’d find there.

Remy’s smirk grew just a little at Spencer's open appraisal. “Go get y’r shower, cher.” He teased him.

Ah, yes, right. Shower. He was supposed to be going to take a shower. Spencer let his eyes make one last sweep over that long body. He found Remy’s eyes again and smiled at the pleased look there. The vain man. He was enjoying being on display like this. Blush heated Spencer's cheeks. He opened his mouth, paused, closed it again, and then quickly spun on his heel and hurried into the bathroom. Anything he had to say could wait until later. Right now he needed to get in the shower and not think about what was lying back there on the bed. If he did, he wasn’t quite sure he’d be able to stop himself from going back out there and climbing right back into bed instead of taking his shower.

Looking down at himself, Spencer blew out a breath. Make that a _cold_ shower.

CXCX

Morning training went rather quickly today. Neither Spencer nor Remy seemed to be feeling any aftereffects of their drinking. But they were feeling the aftereffects of other things. Spencer noticed that there was a new level to the things they said and did. Attraction had always sat silent and unspoken between them. Now it had been acknowledged by both parties and it was no longer hidden or held back. It was a living thing to them. It twined its way through their bond and became a part of everything that they did. Both of them were constantly aware of it. They felt it sitting there at all times, some moments stronger than others. Neither one was bothering to try and hide it in any way. Spencer let himself feel the lust and appreciation when he watched Remy move this way and that, enjoying the play of muscles as he fought against his opponents. Remy made no bones about watching Spencer move as well, openly leering once or twice when Spencer moved in a certain way. Even their casual touches took on a slightly different edge. If Scott noticed—and how could he not? They weren’t exactly subtle—he didn’t say a word about it. He just ran their training like normal and then sent them on their way.

Another shower to wash off training sweat, Spencer in his bathroom and Remy in the one down the hall, and then the two made their way downstairs to join others for breakfast. As had become normal for them, Remy steered Spencer to a chair and then fetched their coffee. He brought himself a plate of food as well and tried, as he did every morning, to convince Spencer to eat some of it. “Y’ gotta put in some calories after all de ones y’ burned out dis morning!” Remy argued.

Spencer just arched a brow and took another drink of his coffee. He chuckled when Remy rolled his eyes and threw his hands up before turning his attention to his food.

It was kind of nice to know that admitting this attraction between them wasn’t going to change other things in their life too much. Remy was still acting the same with him as he always did. He treated him just like normal. Would that stay the same if they took it further? Spencer contemplated it as he drank his coffee. How much would change if they gave in to this feeling? What would happen if it didn’t work out? It wasn’t like they could just walk away from one another. They were stuck together, no matter what. If they tried this and it went sour, they’d have to live with the consequences of it. They’d never be able to walk away from each other. Could he take that risk and chance ruining this? Could he risk breaking things between them?

The breakfast table wasn’t the place to think about this. What he needed to do was get away for a bit and do some private meditation. It would help him clear his head and really think about this.

To distract himself from his thoughts, Spencer let his eyes drift. As he looked around the breakfast table, he noticed there were a few people not there this morning. Bishop wasn’t here, though that wasn’t unusual. And Rogue was missing. That was definitely unusual. Though the trio had taken to trying to avoid one another at all costs, mealtimes had been the one time they hadn’t managed it, and the one time that she seemed determined to run into them. She’d sit as far away as possible and yet spend the whole time shooting furious glares and hurt looks down their direction. Not once since their fight had she missed a meal. So where was she?

 _Maybe she just doesn’t want to see us today_ Spencer told himself. It was possible. Just because she wasn’t there to glare at them didn’t mean that he needed to get himself all worked up and worried. She might even be just sleeping in. Spencer bit his bottom lip and absently watched Remy rise and head over to the sidebar where the coffee carafe was sitting. It wouldn’t hurt to just ask someone if they’d seen her, right? Just to make sure. She probably wouldn’t appreciate it if she found out that Spencer was checking up on her. When she heard, he could just imagine how annoyed it would make her. But he couldn’t keep from wondering and worrying. Where was she? He knew he’d seen her leave with them for the bar. She’d looked excited about it at the dinner table. He just didn’t remember seeing her anywhere at the bar. Had she arrived with them?

“You all right there, Spencer?”

Bobby’s question startled him and brought him out of his thoughts. He blinked a few times to clear his vision and looked over to see the man slipping down into the seat at his side. “Hm? Oh, yes, yes, I’m fine.”

The look Bobby gave him said he clearly didn’t believe him. “You looked a little lost in thought there.”

“You could say that.” He paused, debating for a moment. Well, it couldn’t hurt to ask, could it? “I was wondering—have you seen Rogue anywhere? I remember her coming with us last night but I don’t remember seeing her after that.”

Now it was Bobby’s turn to hesitate. He picked a bit at the food on his plate, pushing his eggs around, and he cast a sideways glance at Spencer. “War said he talked to her last night at the bar. I guess she decided to go visit some friends or something like that. He said she told him she just needed to get away for a while.”

“Oh.”

The worry that Spencer had been feeling now morphed to the familiar sensation of guilt. Damn. He’d been trying so hard to keep things if not friendly then at least peaceful between him and Rogue. Apparently his efforts hadn’t been working. She’d still felt upset and uncomfortable enough that she’d had to take a break. The last thing he’d wanted was to chase her away from her friends and her home. He didn’t want her to feel like she couldn’t be here. Logically, _he_ should be the one to leave. It just wasn’t possible. Not without taking Remy with him, and he didn’t want to take Remy away from his home either. How was a person supposed to win in a situation like this?

His conflicting emotions must’ve shown somewhat. Bobby reached over and lightly touched his shoulder and he was looking at Spencer with compassion. “She’ll be fine, Spencer. She just needs a little time, that’s all.”

“Yeah.” Spencer said softly.

Movement to the left signaled Remy’s return. The Cajun stepped up beside him and reached out with the carafe to refill Spencer's empty mug. His other hand settled on Spencer's shoulder and a wave of comfort came over their bond. Remy had no idea what he was comforting Spencer for, he just knew that Spencer was unhappy and was responding to it. To reassure him, Spencer reached up and lightly patted the hand on his shoulder, silently letting Remy know he was okay. Remy gave his shoulder a squeeze in return.

Silent communication between them was starting to become more and more common. Spencer attributed it to either their growing closeness, or their training together. Either way, they seemed more in tune with one another than ever before, and often there were quite a few things they could say to each other without ever saying a single word. A few touches, some emotions, and they could say quite a bit to each other. Like now, Remy was sending him worry and affection twined together in a way that Spencer knew meant he was asking if Spencer was okay, and did he need to talk about it? Spencer leaned in towards him just the slightest bit and tipped his head just enough to smile at him while giving a small shake of his head, letting him know that, no, he didn’t want to talk about it, just being here in his company was enough.

Remy nodded his understanding and took his seat once more. He let the topic go, moving on to something else entirely. “Y’ know, I was t’inking earlier, cher.”

“Uh oh.” Spencer said dryly.

Humor twined through the bond and Remy shot him an amused look. “Hush, Imp. I was t’inking dat last night was de first night in a while dat we’ve been outta dis place, an it felt great to get out, y’ know?”

“Mm hm. It was nice to get out for a while.” Spencer agreed. Where was Remy going with this?

“So, I was t’inking dat tonight, y’ and I might go on an head out fo’ a bit. Maybe go out and take in some music, jus’ de two of us. Give us a chance to talk together without someone always being right dere.” The smile that crossed Remy’s lips was warm and open, with a slight flirtatious edge to it. “Dere’s dis great jazz club dat I know. I t’ink y’d love it. What do y’ say?”

Now, Spencer knew he wasn’t at his best early in the morning, and he was only on his second cup of coffee at the moment, but even his tired brain picked up on the subtext there. Then again, that might’ve had something to do with the fact that he could feel Remy’s nervousness and excitement all mixed in with attraction and anticipation. Remy was asking him out on a…on a _date_. Spencer smiled the instant he realized that. “That sounds wonderful.”

His eager answer made Remy’s smile grow. “Great! We can head out round dinner time, grab ourselves a bite to eat, too.”

“Sounds good to me.”

As the two men settled back in to finish their breakfasts, neither one could stop smiling.

CXCX

The day passed by quick enough. With their schedules, all of the various bits of training they went through, the time seemed to just fly past. There was just enough time after his training with Ororo for Spencer to grab a quick shower and get dressed into a clean pair of clothes before Remy came knocking at the door. The fact that Remy actually knocked had Spencer smiling. Even with as close as they were getting, and as often as they were together, Remy still remembered how insistent Spencer had been back at the start about boundaries and he was respectful of it. It was sweet but mostly unnecessary anymore. Spencer had long since passed the stage of being uncomfortable around the Cajun. “Come in!”

He was leaning in the closet to grab a shirt when the door opened, so he didn’t see Remy right away. The soft whistle behind him had him grinning though. “Would y’ look at dat. Y’r wearing jeans!”

“Don’t sound so surprised.” Spencer debated for a moment and then grabbed the dark blue striped button up. He pulled it off the hanger and was slipping into it as he turned around. “You were with me when I bought these clothes, so it can’t come as any surprise to you that I own any of them.”

“I knew y’ owned dem, I just aint ever seen y’ in em.” Remy pointed out.

Spencer nodded his head, his attention mostly on buttoning his shirt. “I don’t wear them often. I wear the material too often and it irritates my skin. That’s why I like slacks so much. They’re usually a much nicer material than denim.” With the last button done, Spencer finally looked up. When he did he couldn’t help how he stopped and stared. He knew Remy had to feel the appreciation and lust that spiked inside of Spencer. How could he help it, though? Remy was in boots, dark blue jeans, and a grey silk shirt, and he’d left his hair loose and his sunglasses off for the moment. All in all, he looked devastatingly handsome, and judging by the way he lifted his chin and preened underneath Spencer's gaze, he knew it, too.

Smiling, Remy gave Spencer a once-over as well, letting Spencer feel his own appreciation and lust. “Even if y’ don’t wear em often, dey’re a good look fo’ y’. Y’r looking real nice tonight.” Remy complimented him, his emotions echoing his words.

There was something much more intimate about a compliment when you could feel the person’s honest emotions to go with it. It left no doubt to the sincerity of the words. Spencer's cheeks heated and he gave an embarrassed yet pleased smile. “Thanks. You’re looking absolutely amazing, yourself.”

“Flattery will get y’ everywhere, cher.”

That had Spencer laughing and easily broke through the slightly nervous tension that had started to build. Spencer was relaxed once more as he grabbed his shoes and quickly pulled them on. While he did that, Remy went to the closet and grabbed them each a jacket. For himself, he had his usual trench coat, but he pulled out a nice black jacket for Spencer, holding it open for him to slip into. His hands smoothed out the shoulders for Spencer once he was in it and he smiled at him. “Dere, dat’ll keep y’ warm. Y’ ready?”

“Ready.”

Together, the two made their way downstairs and out to the garage. Spencer found himself thinking that this was the strangest and yet most natural feeling date he’d ever been on. And there was no denying that this was a date. He may have been clueless sometimes but he wasn’t stupid. Remy was taking him out to eat and to listen to music at a jazz club. He’d invited Spencer out, picked him up at their room, dressed up nice for it, and his emotions carried definite interest and attraction to them underneath the typical good humor and affection that Remy almost always felt. On one hand, Spencer was absolutely nervous about this. This seemed like a hell of a huge step to be taking! On the other hand, it felt like the most natural thing in the world. They were already bound together in so many ways. They were bound together on a level that felt even more intimate than a sharing of bodies. Why shouldn’t they have the rest to go with it?

Spencer smiled when he saw that they were taking the bike in. He loved riding on Remy’s bike with him. Just a few minutes and then the two were on the road and on their way.

As always, Remy drove like the hounds of hell were chasing him. Spencer clung tightly to his bondmate and found himself actually laughing when they tore around a corner. He felt more than heard Remy’s laugh join his.

The thrill of their speed and his proximity to Remy was on only eclipsed by the anticipation of the evening ahead, and before he knew it, they were pulling up outside of a club that had a long queue of people waiting outside to get in. Remy slowed them down as he pulled into the parking lot. They found a space to park and Spencer felt a momentary pang at their ride being over. One of these nights he was going to have to ask Remy if he’d mind just taking him out for a long ride. Talk about a great way to spend an evening. Tonight, though, they had other plans, and Spencer was looking forward to them.

Remy threw a joyful grin over his shoulder and Spencer returned it as he dismounted the bike. The two stepped out onto the sidewalk together and Remy placed a guiding hand on the small of Spencer's back, leading him forward. To Spencer's amusement, they bypassed the crowd completely and went straight to the front of the line. It was entertaining to watch this side of Remy. There was a definite hint of someone else here; a side of him that Spencer hadn’t met yet. This side was apparently used to finer things and the money that came with them. Remy reached out and shook the bouncer’s hand when they reached him and only because he was looking did Spencer see the money that passed from palm to palm.

The bouncer drew his hand back in and discreetly pocketed the money. “Evening, Mr. LeBeau.”

“Evening, M. Rowan.” Remy’s voice held a hint of formality to it, something that Spencer hadn’t heard there before. It intrigued him. He leaned in towards Remy’s touch a little more and let himself be led into the dark, atmospheric club. The instant they were through the doors, he was hit by the scent of amazing food, smoke, and the subtle scent of drink in the air. Up on the club’s center stage, a piano was coaxing out a lively tune, soon joined by the saxophone and a trumpet. The effect the club has is amazing. It’s like stepping out of the regular world and into somewhere else entirely. The atmosphere here is captivating and comfortable, all at the same time.

They made their way through the semi crowded room and towards a cozy looking corner booth. Remy stopped them beside it and slid his hand up from Spencer's back to his shoulder, bringing up his other hand as well, and he smoothly slid Spencer's jacket away. It and Remy’s jacket ended up lying half folded in the booth. Spencer smiled at the gesture, not the least bit surprised to find that Remy was quite the gentleman.

No sooner had they settled into the booth, facing one another across the table, than a waitress came up to take their drink orders and hand them menus. Remy ordered a scotch and Spencer a whiskey. Their drinks showed up quickly and they placed their order for their food, handing over their menus. Spencer soon found himself comfortably curled into the booth, a glass of fantastic whiskey in his hand, smiling at his companion. “This is quite a place.” He complimented.

Remy scooped up his own glass, taking a sip and giving a pleased hum at the flavor. “ _Oui_ , it is. I found it a few years back an I been coming off and on since den. De food an drinks are good and de music is always great.”

“I can tell.” Spencer looked over to the stage and watched the band for a moment. He didn’t notice as his fingers tapped lightly against his glass to the beat.

There was simple pleasure on his face and in their bond and Remy enjoyed seeing it there. He curved in his seat to better watch Spencer, enjoying seeing the man relaxing, falling in to the music in a way that few did. Spencer's eyes drifted to half-mast as he let the music just flow over him. Watching him, Remy’s lips curved up. “I didn’t realize y’ was such a jazz fan, cher.”

“It was the one thing my Dad and I had in common.” Spencer answered absently. “I used to play for him and Mom sometimes, before he left.”

Remy didn’t touch on that last part. He knew enough to know not to talk about Spencer's Dad, especially on a night he was trying to make special here. Instead, he focused on a different part of that. “What do y’ play?”

The song finished and Spencer's attention returned to the table. He took a drink off his glass before setting it down on the table. “At the time, I played the trumpet and the clarinet. I didn’t learn the saxophone until college. Mom always thought I should try my hand at the piano, but I just never got around to it.”

“I’d love to hear y’ play sometime.”

Spencer's smile turned a bit shy and his gaze dropped down and away, a surefire sign of his embarrassment. The honest interest in Remy’s voice told him that the man wasn’t being idle with his words. He really did want to hear Spencer play some time. “It’s been a while since I played for anyone. An my instruments are stored away in my closet back in my apartment. They weren’t on the list of things I asked Morgan to send.” Before Remy could suggest anything else, Spencer neatly turned the conversation off himself and over to his partner. “What about you? Do you play anything?”

The look Remy gave him said he clearly knew what Spencer was doing. Still, he let him get away with it. “I play a bit of piano. Some violin, too. Maybe I can teach y’ a bit of de piano sometime, if y’d like.”

“I’d like that.” Spencer said shyly.

“Me too.” Remy agreed. He took a sip off his drink and leaned forward to rest his arms on the table. “What is it y’ like to play?”

That brought them into a discussion of music that carried them through the arrival of the food and most of their meal. Spencer was surprised that he and Remy had never discussed music before, especially since they seemed to enjoy some of the same styles, and had quite different opinions on others. They had a few debates, and not just centered around jazz. They branched out into other genres as well, arguing over their favorite their favorite type of music (classic rock for Remy and blues for Spencer), what female singer had some of the best vocals (they both agreed that Pat Benatar, though Spencer had to admit Reba McEntire ran a close second), and every other subject in between. It was relaxed, comfortable, and the best time that Spencer could remember having in a long time.

Eventually the food was gone and their glasses had been refilled once more. They’d both scooted back in the booth until they could rest their backs against the wall, making it easier to watch the band play, and their free hands were resting on the table, fingers twined loosely together. Spencer had been slightly flustered at the touch at first. He was more used to people who didn’t want to touch in public. But touch with Remy was as easy and necessary as breathing, so he got over his embarrassment and just let himself enjoy it.

For a little while the two men didn’t say anything. They just sat there holding hands and watching the band. Spencer loved the fact that they could do this. That they could just sit there together and not feel required to speak. They were just that comfortable with one another. He was more comfortable with Remy than he could ever remember being with anyone else. There was no one else that Spencer could think of that would sit here with him, not saying a word, and just enjoy the band. Most people would feel the need to fill the silence with conversation. They’d feel required to talk about something, even if it was stupid. Not Remy. He wasn’t just faking it, either. He wasn’t sitting there calm on the outside but awkward on the inside. Their bond radiated a happy contentment from the both of them.

Spencer turned to look over at Remy’s face, enjoying the relaxed expression there. There were no stress lines around his eyes or forehead, no carefully constructed expressions. No masks. Remy looked utterly relaxed. He must’ve felt Spencer watching him, but he didn’t call him on it. Instead, he smiled ever so slightly and took another drink of his scotch. Spencer watched him a moment longer before he finally spoke. “Thank you. For taking me out.”

“Of course.” Remy turned his head as well so that their eyes met. “I like seeing y’ smile.”

The honest sweetness of that brought some color to Spencer's cheeks. He didn’t look away, though. Instead, he gave Remy’s hand a squeeze. He knew he wouldn’t be able to find the words that he wanted to say. They were in there, somewhere, he just couldn’t find them. In the end, he didn’t have to. Remy’s lips curved in response to whatever he was feeling from Spencer and he once more showed his ability to seemingly read Spencer like a book. His thumb brushed over Spencer's knuckles, a soft little caress, and he dropped his head just enough that he could look over top his sunglasses. “What do y’ say we head on outta here, cher?” He suggested in a low voice. “I own a condo, jus’ a few blocks down de road.”

Those emotion behind those words left no doubt as to their meaning. There was no hesitation whatsoever on Spencer's part. He’d made his decision the minute he climbed on that bike tonight and came out here with him. Hell, he’d made it a while ago, the instant he’d realized just how attractive his bondmate was and how much he enjoyed being around him. This had been a long time coming. He looked down briefly at his drink and then met Remy's eyes, his own lit with determination and excitement. “Let’s go.”


	27. Chapter 27

They didn’t waste any time getting out of there. They knew what they were going to Remy’s place for. There was no point in denying it. No games, no hiding. The bond wouldn’t let them pretend. What they felt for one another was right there in the open, flowing back and forth between them, there was no way they could deny it. Spencer swore his hands were almost shaking with want from it when they finally got to Remy’s condo. He could honestly say he didn’t pay a lick of attention to the place as Remy put in his code and took them inside. All his attention was on the gorgeous form in front of him that was leading him inside.

Ever the gentleman, Remy took his coat from him and hung it up on the coat tree. He turned around when he was done and his eyes moved over Spencer from toe up to his head. When their eyes met once more, both of them were smiling. “Would y’ like a tour of de place?” Remy offered him, his smile saying that he knew the answer to that.

Spencer chuckled and shook his head. Only a tiny bit of nerves were in him. It’d been so damn long since he’d done this. “Maybe later.”

“Dat’s what I thought.” Reaching out, Remy caught Spencer's hand with his. He threaded their fingers together and gave a soft squeeze. Then he started to tug, drawing Spencer through the condo, leading him around the furniture. They didn’t even bother turning any lights on. Spencer trusted to Remy to lead him through there. The anticipation was growing with each step.

It wasn’t until they reached the bedroom that they stopped again. Remy stopped beside an ornate, wrought iron bed that was decked out in his trademark black and red, and he turned and met Spencer eye for eye once more. There was heat in his eyes that matched the heat in the bond. Lust, right out there for him to see and feel. It went through Spencer, curled inside of him and then spread out, bathing him in its warmth. Their eyes locked and the two just stared at each other for a long moment. What could they say here? What could they say that hadn’t already been said before?

Remy found some words, and he offered them up to Spencer in a husky voice. “No regrets, Penny.” He promised him, honesty ringing in every word. “I want dis. I want y’.”

Somehow, Remy had managed to find the perfect words, the ones that Spencer hadn’t even known he’d needed. They reached down inside of him and cleared away the last bit of hesitation that he hadn’t even realized was sitting there. He met Remy’s eyes and he didn’t hold anything back, all of it right out there for the man to see. “No regrets. I want you too, Remy.”

There was just a moment of hesitation, a pause that lasted just long enough to make Spencer actually start to worry, but then Remy squeezed his hand and he hesitantly asked “Spencer, cher, have y’…have y’ done dis b’fore?”

For one moment Spencer was stunned silent. Then, unable to help himself, he reacted the only way he could. His face stretched with a wide grin and he laughed. Remy’s words worked to set him at ease better than anything else. Spencer used their joined hands to tug Remy towards him, still chuckling. He let go of Remy’s hand to wrap his arms around him, drawing him in until they were pressed chest to chest. Laughing brown eyes peeked up at Remy through long lashes. “Remy, I was a teenager when I went to college." Devilment flashed in his wide brown eyes. "A teenage empath who discovered his libido while there and had almost no adult supervision.” He had no shame about that. Spencer knew it shocked people sometimes, just how open he was about that. Derek had been completely stunned by Spencer's blasé attitude to his behavior in college. But Spencer just didn’t see it as a big deal. He’d been safe, mostly. He’d come out clean and unharmed from it and he’d enjoyed the hell out of himself. It was one of the few normal teenage things he’d indulged in. He also knew that, if anyone would understand, it would be Remy. Who better to understand than another empath? Spencer could tell by Remy's expression that he  _did_  understand. Spencer chuckled again. “I’m not some shy, scared virgin you need to worry about. I know what I’m getting in to here.”

“Well den.” Remy’s smiled turned into more of a smirk and it was definitely a little bit wicked. He leaned in, pressing their bodies together even more, and he put their lips just a hair apart. “I’m all yours.”

Sweet God. Three words designed to take a man’s blood and send it all south. Coupled with the emotions that Remy was deliberately sending to him, Spencer stood no chance in hell. He gave in to the urge that had sat simmering inside of him ever since last night. Using his hold on Remy’s waist, he tugged him in that last little bit and pressed their lips together.

The kiss was just as good as it had been last night. Last night’s had been hot and fast, full of lust and Remy’s charm, overpowering and overwhelming them both. Spencer intended that this kiss be different.

Spencer tipped his head up into it and brought his hand up to cup Remy’s cheek. The urge was there to just press in, to taste and take as they had last night, but he held it back, wanting this to be something different. Wanting it to mean something different. He knew that, after his words last night, Remy wasn’t going to be here with him like this if he was just some rebound. The man respected him far too much to do that, especially once Spencer said the words and brought the idea to his attention. Remy would’ve thought about it after that, he knew, and if he had felt that this was a rebound thing, he wouldn’t be here. Amazing, it was, to think that he could trust someone that much to just know that with so much certainty. Knowing that Remy was here because he wanted to be, because he wanted Spencer that much, well, Spencer wanted to make sure this was a night Remy would remember. He wanted to make sure this was a night about them, about what was between them, and not just about a flash of heat. Because Remy’s words had sunk in for Spencer, too. The Cajun had said he didn’t want this to be because of his charm. He wanted to be wanted for him. Something told him that Remy hadn’t often had people who wanted him just for him. Spencer was going to give him that.

With all that in mind, Spencer set himself on a certain course. Not hard, not fast, but sweet. He was going to wrap himself around this man, wrap them up in one another, and show him just how much he wanted him, every single inch of him.

His kiss was slow and thorough. Not a flash of fire, but a steady build of heat that seeped through them, heating their blood and melting them. He felt Remy’s surprise at first and then his enjoyment as the man let go and happily melted down into it with him. Remy’s hands slid up and over Spencer's hips, one hand circling around to the small of Spencer's back, not tugging at him, just holding there, thumb stroking lightly through his shirt.

They broke apart, heavy eyes opening and meeting, and in that look as well as through their bond a thousand words passed without a sound. Spencer's usual shyness seemed nowhere in sight. When Remy started to walk backwards, Spencer went with him without fear, letting himself be drawn over to the bed step by step. He trusted to Remy to guide them and turned his attention to much more enjoyable matters. Leaning in, he captured Remy’s lips again, going for another of those slow kisses that left him feeling like he was drugged, on the greatest high of his life. It got even better when they reached the bed and Remy fell back, pulling Spencer with him. They landed with Spencer completely on top of him and it had them both moaning into their kiss.

When nimble fingers slipped between them to undo the buttons on his shirt, Spencer had only a moment of pause, a moment of nerves. He didn’t exactly have a body to be proud of. But his insecurities didn’t even have time to build. Remy felt them and he sent his own lust and appreciation and affection over to Spencer, using those to banish any of Spencer's doubts, making absolutely sure that the younger man knew without a shadow of a doubt that Remy wanted him and liked him as he was. After that, there was no more hesitation.

Words seemed to have vanished for them. Neither man said a word as they slowly started to strip one another of their clothes, hands and mouths exploring all the new flesh that was exposed.

It was like nothing either one had ever experienced before. Spencer had always picked up on what a partner felt during sex. He’d always been connected to the person he was with. But those memories held nothing on this. This wasn’t just knowing what a partner felt. It wasn’t just feeling the secondhand echo of someone else’s emotions. They felt everything the other person felt. Spencer felt Remy’s enjoyment when Spencer's hands scratched across his chest, tugging lightly at the chest hair there. Remy felt it when he bit Spencer's ear and a jolt of lust ran through his genius. They felt what each other felt like it was their own. And their bond – oh, man, their bond was just _singing_. That sunshine feeling was back in their bond once more, almost like when they’d first bonded. Almost, but not quite. The bond wasn't just liquid sunshine right now like it had been during the initial bond. It was so much more. It was like they'd drawn in the whole sun, turned it liquid, and poured it directly inside of them, heating their bodies and filling them full of a light like they’d never felt before.

In no time at all the two men were naked on the bed, their hands running over one another, and the room was filled with the sounds of their loving. And when the time came, when their bodies were prepared and they couldn’t wait a moment longer, Remy sank into him body and soul, and the connection between them flared brighter than it ever hand, parts of them opening up inside in ways that they’d never felt, until Spencer was Remy and Remy was Spencer and there was no separating them. Their bodies moved together and the light inside grew and grew until they couldn’t hold it in anymore and the condo echoed with the sound of their cries. The pleasure was so intense that a wave of pleasure arrowed out from them, the empathy raging out of control as Spencer had never had happen before, and people on the floors below them were hit almost hard enough to knock them to their knees, leaving them wondering what the hell had just happened.

Upstairs, the bonded pair had just enough energy to separate their bodies before once more wrapping around one another. Holding each other tightly, they dropped down into sleep.

CXCX

Surprisingly, Spencer woke first the next morning. He woke as was common, his body stretched out over top of Remy’s, but there were definite differences compared to their usual morning. Usually, they were at least semi dressed, for one. And Spencer usually held himself back from nuzzling in too much. He’d never allowed himself that liberty before; it hadn’t been appropriate, even with all their unusual touching. This morning was different. There was absolutely nothing holding him back from snuggling in to the warm body underneath his. The warm, _naked_ body under his. Spencer pressed his face in against the skin in front of him—Remy’s neck—and sighed happily.

After last night, how could he be anything but happy? He and Remy had woken up twice through the night, reaching for one another each time. Luckily, the intensity of their first time together didn’t happen again. It was still intense, yes, but nothing like that first time. The bond didn’t consume them as it had then. And, thankfully, they hadn’t projected again, either. Spencer wondered absently if it was because they’d had full sex the first time around and had only used hands and mouths the other times, or if it had been that strong because it was their first time, or if it had something to do with their bond cementing a little more in them. He did feel a little different, today. A little…more. Stronger.

Ah, that was a thought for a later time. Right now he was too comfortable and content to think deep thoughts. He was mostly draped over Remy, a pleasant enough feeling that grew even more pleasant when he shifted just a little bit. At the same time, he nuzzled in, rubbing the tip of his nose over the slight stubble along Remy’s jawline. He felt as his movements started to wake Remy up a little bit. With his left hand Spencer reached up and threaded his fingers into Remy’s hair, gently holding his head in place while he trailed his lips over Remy’s jawline and up to his ear. He nipped at the earring there, giving a light tug, and he felt Remy wake a little more. Spencer smiled and tugged again and was rewarded with a soft moan.

Hands suddenly settled on his hips and Spencer found his body tugged until he was no longer draped half on Remy but was fully lying on him. Spencer moaned, hips hitching as their morning erections pressed against each other. The first touch had Remy’s legs spreading and Spencer easily dropped down between them. He braced his hands on the bed by Remy’s shoulders and lifted his head to look down into a pair of sleepy eyes that were glowing happily up at him. Spencer let his smile grow and he gave a teasing roll of his hips, enjoying the little gasp that Remy gave. “Good morning, Remy.” He teased.

The red in Remy’s eyes flashed a little brighter for a moment. “ _Oui_ , it is.” He agreed. His hands tightened on Spencer's hips and he pushed his own hips up in return. “Hell of a wakeup call.”

“Mm, my favorite.” Spencer moved his knees a bit more comfortably and lined his hips up better. Then he started a slow, lazy thrust, keeping his hips pressed low enough to make sure their cocks brushed against one another with each movement, the heat and the drag of skin against skin sending little electric jolts through him, tingling along his nerves.

Remy tossed his head back and pushed his hips up with a soft gasping breath. His hands squeezed Spencer's hips, tugging at them in an effort to speed him up. Spencer didn’t let him. He kept the slow, lazy pace, and added to it by lowering down to nip at the expanse of throat now exposed. He nipped and licked over the prominent adam’s apple, loving the sounds that it drew from his partner. Their bond was heating up once more just like it had last night, only slower. It carried the same hazy, sleepy feeling to it that their bodies did, building little by little. Instead of a blaze, it was a slow burn, consuming them little by little. Spencer was loving it. He mapped the skin of Remy’s neck with his tongue and lips, tracing over the smooth skin here, the rasp of stubble over here, and ending up over those full lips that could tempt anyone to sin. Just as slow as the rest of his movements, Spencer ran his tongue over Remy’s lips, dipping past them when they parted on another gasp.

With one hand still braced by Remy’s shoulder, it allowed Spencer to reach down with his other hand, catching hold of Remy’s thigh. He stroked firmly over his thigh, to his hip, and then scratched his nails back down towards his knee, drawing Remy’s legs up as he did. “Legs up, baby.” Spencer murmured against Remy’s lips. He bit Remy’s bottom lip, sucking it in, tracing over it with his tongue. Breath shuddered out of Remy. His legs lifted, wrapping around Spencer's waist, and their bodies slid even closer together, making them both moan. Spencer scratched over Remy’s thigh again, back to his hip, and when Remy tried to quicken the pace again, Spencer gripped his hip tightly and held him in place.

He pulled back from their kiss to look down into Remy’s eyes. They were hazy, pupils blown wide with arousal, and they kept fluttering shut and then pulling back open as if they wanted to close but he was fighting it, trying to keep them open and watch. Spencer had never seen anything so beautiful. Hazy eyes, flushed cheeks, hair mussed around his head, mouth open for those little gasping breaths interspaced with moans. Spencer couldn’t help but steal another slow, thorough kiss. “You’re absolutely gorgeous.” He said when they broke apart once more. “You look so beautiful like this, Remy.”

Remy’s hands spread over Spencer's back, not scratching or tugging, just seeking out more skin to skin contact. “Penny, cher, _s’il tu plait_ , ah, _Dieu_ …” Breathless words in broken French fell from Remy’s lips.

The heat in their bond had grown even more. Spencer could feel Remy’s lust, feel how desperate he was growing, and he knew he couldn’t tease him anymore or he’d risk Remy flipping them over and taking control. That wasn’t what Spencer wanted. He wanted to drive Remy completely out of his mind. So he let go of Remy’s hip and brought his hand up, licking his palm, enjoying the throaty moan that Remy gave at that. Then he reached down between them and gathered their cocks together, wrapping them both up with his hand as best he could. This time, when his hips rolled, the pressure and friction was even better. It was for Remy too, judging by the sounds he was making. Spencer only had to adjust his hand once to get just the right angle and then he started to gradually increase the speed of his thrusting. He felt Remy’s legs tighten around him, heels digging into his back, and he bent his head once more to take Remy’s mouth again.

The sunshine was pouring into their bond once more, the slow burn now up to a full blaze. It filled them, consuming them from the inside out, until suddenly Remy was straining against him, heels digging in even harder and his hips shoving up. Spencer felt the throb of Remy’s cock against him and gave his own shudder at how damn good it felt. He drew back from their kiss to watch Remy’s face as he was torn apart. That sight mixed in with the inferno blazing through them and the echoes of Remy’s orgasm and there was just no way Spencer could hold out. Two thrusts later and he was throwing his head back, muscles straining as pleasure whited out his world.

He had just enough control to not drop straight down onto Remy when he was done. He held steady long enough for Remy’s shaky legs to drop off of him and down to the bed and then he moved just enough to drop down at Remy’s side. He pressed an absent kiss against Remy’s shoulder and stroked a shaky hand over the light curls on his chest. “Morning, Rem.”

Remy let out a shaky laugh. “I’ll say it again, cher. Hell of a wakeup call.”

“I didn’t think you’d mind.”

“Hell no.” Remy said fervently. “Y’ wake me up like dat any time y’ want.”

For a few long minutes, the two of them just lay there, half twined together as they tried to catch their breath. Spencer felt Remy drifting, his body heading back towards sleep. It made Spencer's smile just slightly smug. He waited until he was sure Remy was actually out, really out, and then he carefully extracted himself from the bed and headed to the bathroom. A quick cleanup for himself in there, plus some tending to typical morning needs, and then he was wrapping himself up in Remy’s robe which had been hanging on the bathroom hook and he was making his way back out to the bedroom with a damp cloth in hand.

Remy only stirred once while Spencer cleaned him up. Even then, all it took was Spencer's hand stroking over his hair and a sensation of reassurance sent down the bond, and he settled once more. Spencer finished cleaning him up and drew the blankets up over him, tucking him in. Then he took the towel and tossed it into the dirty hamper.

He didn’t want to go back to sleep. Cuddling with Remy always sounded good, true, but it was morning time and Spencer wanted coffee. Lots and lots of coffee. And maybe, while Remy was sleeping, he’d settled in and do a little bit of thinking. Last night had been a hell of a night and this morning was proving to be the same.

It wasn’t really that hard to find his way around Remy’s kitchen. There were a few moments of amusement, like when he opened the breadbox and found a handgun hidden in there. A _loaded_ handgun. He looked at it for a moment and wondered why Remy, who had his own built in weapon, would hide a gun in his house, or even really _need_ a gun. Then again, his explosions could cause some serious damage sometimes. There were probably instances that it was easier to just have a gun handy. In the end he just shrugged one shoulder and figured it was just a part of Remy and he moved on.

He found all the things he needed for coffee and quickly got a pot put together and brewing. It was as he was just closing the top that he heard the smallest sound behind him. Just the whisper of a footstep. Something he might not have noticed before he’d started training with Remy under Scott’s instruction. But Spencer caught it now and he smiled to himself, thinking that Remy must be trying to sneak up on him. Two could play at that game. Spencer opened himself to their bond, trying to use it to gauge where Remy was, only…judging by this, Remy was still asleep.

Instantly Spencer's playful side shut off and the agent in him pushed forward. He listened carefully to gauge his surroundings while moving towards the sink, trying to play like he was just going to wash his hands. Opening his empathy, he reached out to try and see who the hell was here, only to find that whoever it was, they’d shielded themselves. He got a vague sense of a presence and that was it. Nothing more. Whoever this was, they knew to shield against an empath, which explained how they’d gotten inside without them noticing. But no one friendly would be doing that. Someone friendly wouldn’t shield themselves against empaths and then sneak up on him. Whoever this was, they were here for trouble.

Spencer could feel Remy in the back of his mind, still sound asleep in the bedroom, and that place deep down inside of Spencer, the one that demanded he heal when someone was injured, the one that couldn’t stand to see Remy injured, suddenly roared to life in a way that Spencer hadn’t felt before. His own protector came to life and demanded he protect his Guardian. Drawing in a breath, Spencer braced himself and then lashed out with his empathy, sending out a wave of pain as sharp as a knife. There was a thud as someone hit the ground, a low groan of pure pain, and that gave Spencer all the time he needed. He darted to the breadbox and yanked out the gun he’d found earlier. One move had him turned around and the gun cocked, pointed at the man lying on the floor halfway between the kitchen and the hall that led back to the bedroom.

Without even thinking about it, Spencer walked around the man, never moving his gun from him, and he brought himself around so that he was placed between the man and the hall, protecting his Guardian, while at the same time he sent a warning burst of emotion down the bond to wake Remy up and alert him to trouble. When he spoke, his voice was hard and cold, a sound that would’ve stunned anyone who knew him. “Who are you and what are you doing sneaking around here?”

The man lifted one hand and pushed his hair back from his face, looking up at Spencer but making no effort to rise. Surprisingly, he didn’t look the least bit bothered by the fact that he’d just been knocked to the ground and now had a loaded gun pointed at him. His gaze was openly assessing as it ran over Spencer from head to toe and back again, finally settling on his face. A small smile touched his lips. “Would y’ really shoot an old man, son?” He drawled out in a voice reminiscent of Remy’s. It was smoother, the accent not as thick, but it definitely had that New Orleans sound to it.

Spencer didn’t have any time to think on it. He felt Remy’s presence, which had started coming almost instantly after Spencer sent the warning, and just a second later his partner was at his side, his own gun held out in his hand. The man’s eyes moved to Remy and Spencer didn’t even stop to think about it before taking one step to the side, putting himself between the two. He was stopped when Remy’s hand caught his arm, not tugging him away but holding him still and getting his attention. Then Remy leaned around Spencer's shoulder just a bit without fully coming out from behind him. His gun was lowered, Spencer saw, and there was an exasperated look on his face. The look wasn’t aimed at Spencer, though. It was aimed at the man on the ground. “Can’t y’ just knock like a normal visitor instead of scaring de hell outta m’ company? Are y’ looking to get shot?”

The man’s smile grew. He ignored Remy completely and put one hand to the ground, pushing himself up to a sitting position, his eyes never leaving Spencer. “Y’ never did answer my question, boy. Would y’ really shoot an old man?”

“You’re not old.” Spencer said automatically. He met the man eye to eye and lifted his chin just slightly, refusing to be cowed, even by a man he was starting to worry might be Remy’s father. And age makes no difference. I’ve seen grandfathers who could do things that would give you nightmares for years to come. Being older does not make a person exempt from being a threat. I would’ve done it, if I had to. I may’ve hated myself afterwards, but I’d have done it.” _To keep Remy safe_ he added on silently.

“A bit protective, are we?”

“You have no idea.” Spencer answered. But he lowered his gun. It was obvious this guy was someone that Remy knew. Plus, the fact that Remy felt safe enough to lower his gun was a pretty good clue that this guy was safe. He wouldn’t do that if he felt there was any chance of a threat against Spencer. That part inside of Spencer that had felt the urge to protect his bondmate was slowly starting to fade away again. It helped that Remy was pressed up against his back, still holding his shoulder with one hand while his other went to Spencer's hip. He wasn’t interfering, wasn’t stopping anything. He just stood there, calm and steady against Spencer, his emotions a warm balm in Spencer's mind.

The man pushed up off the ground finally, now that the gun was no longer on him, and he rose to his feet in front of them. To Spencer's immense surprise, the man’s grin seemed to have grown and his expression was clearly pleased and just slightly…proud? He looked at Spencer and gave a small little nod. “Y’ got spunk, boy. Dat’s good. I like dat.” He folded one arm in front and one behind and gave a small bow. “Jean Luc LeBeau, at y’r service. It’s a pleasure to meet y’.”

Oh, God, it _was_ Remy’s father. Shit. He’d just attacked Remy’s damn father and threatened him with a gun. Shit, shit, shit. This was not good. What on earth was he supposed to say here? “I, ah, I’m really sorry about…all this.” Spencer gestured around them with his free hand, the one with the gun still held down at his side. “I heard you and when I reached out, I could only feel a slight presence and I just sort of reacted. I’m so sorry.”

Remy’s hand suddenly stroked over his hip and a wave of comfort came over the bond. “It’s fine, cher. Y’ didn’t do not’ing wrong, don’t y’ worry.” Remy reassured him.

“He’s right, it’s fine.” Jean Luc added in.

Seeing that Spencer was still uncomfortable and worried, Remy took control of the situation. “C’mon, cher, it looks like y’r coffee might be done. Why don’t we all sit down and have a cup?”

That was how Spencer found himself sitting at a table at seven o’clock in the morning drinking coffee with Remy and his father while he was still in his robe and Remy was dressed only in a pair of boxers. Remy finished pouring the last of the coffee and came over, slipping into the seat at Spencer's side. Their chairs were close enough that their arms brushed together, a gesture of reassurance that wasn’t lost on Spencer. He didn’t complain, though. He leaned in just a little more and took the comfort that was being offered. Remy gave him a smile before turning to look over at his father. “Not dat I’m not happy to see y’, but what’re y’ doing here, Papa? It aint like y’ to jus’ drop in outta nowhere. Is somet’ing wrong?”

His answer was the last thing either one had expected. “I heard about y’r bonding, of course.” Jean Luc said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world

Shock echoed through the two. Remy and Spencer exchanged a surprised look. Stunned, Remy looked back to his father. “Y’ _heard_? From where?” Remy demanded.

“Word travels fast, y’ know dat. Dere’s rumors flying all over de place about dis. Especially with dat Professor of y’rs calling in favors, asking fo’ information. Somet’ing like dis, it’s big news. Y’r lucky I got here first. Dere are others dat are going to be on deir way.”

“What are you talking about?” Spencer asked. He found himself sitting up a little straighter, his mind suddenly more alert. Did Jean Luc know something about all of this?

“Y’ two have attracted a lot of attention. Y’r Professor wasn’t as discreet as he should’ve been. Words already traveling through de underground. De first Healer/Guardian pair bonded in over t’ree centuries, dat’s news dat travels fast.” Jean Luc said. Sitting back in his chair, he looked from one to the other. “Y’ boys better be prepared, cause I aint de only one dat’s going to be coming fo’ y’, and dey won’t all be as nice as me.”


	28. Chapter 28

Last time: _“Y’ two have attracted a lot of attention. Y’r Professor wasn’t as discreet as he should’ve been. Words already traveling through de underground. De first Healer/Guardian pair bonded in over t’ree centuries, dat’s news dat travels fast.” Jean Luc said. Sitting back in his chair, he looked from one to the other. “Y’ boys better be prepared, cause I aint de only one dat’s going to be coming fo’ y’, and dey won’t all be as nice as me.”_

CXCX

Jean Luc’s words set off an immediate reaction. Almost instantly, Remy was sitting up straighter in his chair, his whole body braced as if trouble was going to come breaking in right that instant. Spencer was sitting up straighter, too, his wide eyes locked on Jean Luc. “Excuse me?”

“What’re y’ talking about?” Remy demanded. His tone was nowhere near as polite as Spencer's had been. His body shifted, twisting just a little more towards Spencer, and one hand drifted to where his gun was still sitting on the table.

Spencer reached over and laid a hand on Remy’s arm. Whether it was to relax Remy or to comfort himself was anyone’s guess. Probably a little bit of both. All he knew was that he needed the comfort of that contact to help ground him.  People were coming for them? Why on earth would people be coming after them? For what purpose? They weren’t anything special! Their bond was unique, true, but it didn’t have any benefits for anyone else. And what was this about them being the first pair bonded in over three centuries? That part finally clicked in Spencer's mind and his eyes widened a bit. Did that mean Jean Luc knew about people like them? Question after question after question tumbled through Spencer's mind.

“Did y’ t’ink no one would be interested in y’?” Jean Luc asked. He looked to Remy and shook his head. “I taught y’ better dan dat, _mon fils._ I taught y’ to be more cautious dan dis.” One of his hands lifted and waved through the air as if to dismiss his words. “Dat’s not important right now. I came as quickly as I could. A few of my people let me know dat Belle was making preparations to come dis way and I knew I had to get here first. Best guess, we got about two hours b’fore she hits town.” Seeing Remy’ south open, Jean Luc held out a hand in a gesture for silence. “We’re safe, _mon fils_. Dere’s a watch downstairs. But we shouldn’t linger here fo’ too long. I know y’ have questions, de both of y’, and I’ll answer what I can—once we’re somewhere safe.”

“Is this Belle that much of a threat that we really need to hide?” Spencer asked.

Remy snorted, his lip curling up slightly. “She’s fucking crazy, dat one.”

“She’s dangerous.” Jean Luc shot Remy a sharp look, silencing any protest he might’ve given. When he was sure Remy was quiet, he looked back to Spencer. “And it’s not just her. She’s just one dat I know about. Dere are others I know are coming, I just don’t know _when_. It’d be safer all around fo’ us to be somewhere safe while we finish talking, just in case.”

That would have to do for now. Spencer had more questions—he had a veritable truckload of questions—but if Jean Luc was that sure that they needed to be safe before they talked, well, Spencer was going to go along with it. He wasn’t going to take any risks with Remy’s safety. And judging by the way Remy was feeling, he was accepting Jean Luc’s words and trusted them. That was enough for Spencer to extend the same trust. He nodded at the man to show his agreement.

Remy put his hand on Spencer's shoulder, squeezing briefly. “C’mon, let’s go get dressed, cher.”

Together, the two pushed up from the table and silently hurried back to the bedroom to get dressed. They needed to get out of here before this trouble that jean Luc was worried about decided to show up. But once they got to whenever they were going, some questions were going to be answered. Spencer had plenty of things to ask and he was going to make sure he got his answers.

CXCX

Things just kept getting weirder and weirder. Spencer felt kind of like he was in a movie of some sort. A movie in which he had no idea what the hell was going on. The only sure thing in his world, the only thing he could focus on and count on to stay steady, was the presence of Remy right at his side. The man hadn’t gone more than a foot from him since Jean Luc’s arrival. Honestly, Spencer was glad for it. If it wasn’t for Remy there was no telling how Spencer would be feeling at the moment. He took comfort from his bondmate’s close proximity. Things just seemed a little easier to handle with Remy at his side. Not as…strange.

Strange was a good word for it all. It got stranger, too.

When they were dressed and ready to go, with Remy armed with his gun and a few decks of cards, they met Jean Luc in the living room and the man took them outside to where he had a car waiting for him. A car with a _driver_. Odd, but not that big of a deal. Spencer climbed into the back of the SUV at Remy’s bidding while Jean Luc took the passenger’s seat. Once they were all in, the driver set off, not even consulting Jean Luc on where to go, telling Spencer that they were heading to a prearranged destination. He filed that little fact away with everything else he was learning here. For Spencer, that was the easiest thing to do. When in doubt—observe. Quite a lit could be learned by being silent and simply watching.

For instance, he learned that they expected to be followed. The driver employed quite a few different techniques to make sure that they didn’t have a tail. Also, the lack of reaction to it from Remy and Jean Luc suggested that the two were used to this.

When finally, after almost thirty minutes of silent driving, they arrived at their destination, it was just a regular apartment building. A building that was only about a ten minute walk from Remy’s condo. Spencer kept his words locked behind his teeth and said nothing as they parked in the parking garage and made their way out of the SUV. He even managed to keep silent when six different people seemingly materialized out of the shadows and came walking to them. One of the men—and they were all men, he saw, though the darker clothes gave them an almost neutral look to them—stepped up to Jean Luc and murmured something in his ear.

Spencer had no qualms about opening up his shields to take a feel from these men. They were attempting to shield, he could feel, and were failing miserably at it. A weak empath might not have been able to pick up on what they were feeling; hell, he had to admit, he might not have felt them if his empathy was still at the strength it had been before this bonding. But his empathy _had_ grown since then, by a hell of a lot, and he easily picked up on what they felt. Calm, controlled. Alert. There was a feel to their emotions that was like what could be felt from a SWAT team when they were preparing to go into hostile territory. That comparison had Spencer's eyebrows going up with surprise. Who were these guys? Guards?

He felt Remy turn a bit next to him, sending his curiosity as a silent question, and Spencer gave a miniscule shake of his head to let Remy know not to worry about it.

The man by Jean Luc stepped back with the others once more and all of their emotions shifted, almost at the same time. Respect and loyalty were strong and bright as each man put a fist to his heart and half bowed first to Jean Luc and then to Remy. Then, as smoothly as they’d appeared, they melted away into the shadows once more.

“Let’s get inside.” Jean Luc said, gesturing to them.

Quiet, lost in thought, Spencer trusted his safety to Remy and let his mind wander over everything that had happened so far. Remy must’ve sensed it because he caught Spencer's hand and drew it up to tuck in the crook of his arm. Spencer absently followed the direction and curled his fingers around the inside of Remy’s arm. That hold allowed Remy to lead him safely where they needed to go, steering him down the halls, into an elevator, and eventually into an apartment. Spencer kept note of it only vaguely. The rest of his attention was focused on putting all this new information together and trying to piece together everything.

It was once they were inside that Jean Luc took note of the vacant look on Spencer's face. He watched Remy lead the genius over to the couch and get him sitting down and settled and he furrowed his eyebrows with concern. He waited until Remy straightened up and moved away to quietly ask. “Is he okay?” He cast a discreet look over to Spencer, who was sitting where Remy had left him, curled up in the corner of the couch.

A hint of humor touched Remy’s lips. “ _Oui_ , Papa. He’s just t’inking, dat’s all. I recognize de feel of dat. He gets like dat when dere’s a puzzle to work t’rough.”

“He’s a puzzle all on his own. He’s not quite what I expected. Everything I heard said he’s a quiet, shy sort of person.” The way he said that left no doubt what he thought of that.

That brought a grin to Remy’s lips. Spencer hadn’t been quiet and shy so far. “He’s running on only a cup of coffee right now; don’t expect sunshine and cheer. Speakin’ of, y’ got any in dis place?”

“Coffee? _Non_.”

“ _Merde._ Well, den, y’ can expect him to be a lil more in’eresting dan normal.” Remy warned. “His brain an mouth filter don’t work right wit’out a few cups of coffee.”

“Quit maligning my character, Remy.” Spencer called out, interrupting their conversation. He’d been listening to it in an absent sort of way so far, but he was back out of his mind now and ready to get started on this conversation. He wanted explanations and answers and the only way to get those was to talk.

Remy turned back to him and flashed a broad grin. “Jus’ telling it like it is.” He strolled back over to the couch and dropped down beside Spencer, smirking at him. Spencer rolled his eyes and shoved at his arm. “Brat.”

“Imp.” Remy shot back. Somehow the word came out sounding more fond than irritated.

Their playful banter was being watched closely by Jean Luc. The older man felt his heart warm a little at seeing his son looking so happy and content. Even with the situation around them, there was no denying the happiness that Remy wore. It showed on him each time he looked Spencer's direction. Jean Luc smiled as he sat down in the easy chair near the couch. Whoever Spencer was, whether he was the sharp kid that he’d shown this morning or the shy and quiet person he was rumored to be, it was obvious he was good for Remy. He made him happy. In the end, that was what mattered most.

It was Spencer who brought them to the subject at hand. He didn’t, however, launch in with countless questions as Remy had expected. He settled down into the couch, drawing his legs up and crossing them like he was settling in for the long haul, and his sharp eyes went right to Jean Luc. When he spoke, his words were direct and to the point. “Are we safe here?”

“Fo’ now.” Jean Luc said. “I’ve got people outside watching fo’ us. We should be safe here fo’ a while.”

Spencer looked to Remy, waiting for the small nod of confirmation before he brought his gaze back to Jean Luc. “Good. There’s quite a lot going on here and a lot that I think requires an explanation and I’m sure it’s going to take time to get through it all. I’m willing to wait on most of it for now. However, there is one thing I don’t want to wait on. Back at Remy’s condo you said that we were the first bonded pair in three centuries. That implies that you have some knowledge of people like us. I’d like to know what that is.”

The older man arched a brow at him. “Direct, aren’t y’?”

“Typically, no. But these are special circumstances and I’m not in the mood to play the usual word games, especially not with something this important.”

“I can respect dat. What do y’ know about Guilds, Dr. Reid?”

“Spencer, please.” Spencer said automatically. “And as for the Guilds, I have some knowledge, but not a lot. I know the Bureau likes to pretend they don’t exist anymore.” Slanting a look to his side at his bondmate, Spencer added. “I know Remy’s a Thief. Rogue took great pleasure in explaining to me how he was part of the Thieves Guild. Considering my job, I think she hoped it’d make me run away.”

Surprise flashed over Remy’s eyes and through his emotions. “Y’ never told me dat.”

“Yes, well, you never told me about it yourself.” Spencer shot back. “I assumed it meant you didn’t want to talk about it.”

“It aint dat, Spencer. It’s just, some of it I can’t talk about, an some of it aint exactly de best moments in m’ life.” Sheepishly, Remy shrugged one shoulder. “It aint somet’ing easy to explain to someone. Dere’s a lot more to it dan me jus’ being a t’ief.”

Spencer rolled his eyes. “Obviously.” He settled back more comfortably into the couch and angled himself just slightly towards Remy without even thinking about it. His eyes flashed briefly over to Jean Luc and then back towards his bondmate. “The deference with which the others greeted you was a pretty good indicator that there’s more here than I know. Though, it was nothing compared to the way they greeted your father.” Profiling skills that he hadn’t had need to use for a while were coming to the fore now; skills that had once been second nature. The instincts he’d learned at the Bureau were on high alert right now. “I’d speculate that your father here is someone rather important in the Guild. The way they treat him, the way they treat you, are pretty good indicators of that, as is the fact that he has the ability to show up here with a guard at all.”

“Y’ notice a lot.” Jean Luc commented.

It took control to keep from rolling his eyes again. While he would’ve if Remy had made that comment, he couldn’t bring himself to be rude to Jean Luc like that. The man didn’t know him. He was sure that the man had probably looked into him, researched the person in his son’s life, but that didn’t mean that the man knew him or what he was capable of, and he couldn’t treat him like he did. So Spencer kept his tone respectful as he said “Byproduct of years at the Bureau. I tend to observe those around me almost constantly. It’s a bit of an occupational hazard. But, I digress. We’re veering off the matter at hand. To go back to your original question, sir, I have some knowledge of Guilds, enough to know they exist, but beyond that let’s just assume my knowledge is very limited.”

“ _D’accord_.” Jean Luc’s posture shifted, his body language changing, and Spencer was slightly amused to see the man slip into the role of ‘teacher’. “So, if y’ know of deir existence, den y’ know dere’s a Thieves Guild and an Assassins Guild. What very few people know is dat at one point in history, dere was a Healers Guild. De stories say dat becoming a Healer wasn’t like becoming a Thief or an Assassin. It was more a calling dan anyt’ing else. De main Healers were all mutants dat had some form of healing ability. Dey say dey had lesser Healers, ones dat would be what doctors are t’day. Back den, dere wasn’t organized medicine like what we’ve got. It’s said dat de Healers traveled everywhere. Dey healed anyone and everyone dat needed it, no matter deir race, creed, religion, or anything else. In a war, dey’ve move through either side. A Healer can’t just ignore someone in pain, as y’ve probably noticed. Even when it gets dem in trouble.”

That was an understatement. Remy looked at Spencer, arching one brow, and Spencer felt his cheeks heat in response. He shifted just enough that his hair fell once more and hid his face. He felt Remy’s amusement and ignored it, focusing instead on Jean Luc.

If the man noticed their exchange—and Spencer highly doubted there was anything those sharp eyes _didn’t_ notice—he chose not to comment on it, instead just continuing on with his story.

“Guardians were dere to take care of de Healer. To keep dem safe. Compelled to heal de way dey are, can y’ imagine some of de situations dey’d get into? Or de risk dey’d take just by helping out some people? Dere are quite a few out dere who wouldn’t hesitate to take out someone dat dey knew was going to go heal deir enemy. And dere were dose who would capture a Healer to keep dem dere fo’ deir own purposes. A personal slave, forced to heal all de time, only fo’ them.”

Remy’s hand settled on Spencer protectively. “Dat’s why dey had Guardians.”

“Exactly.” Jean Luc nodded at him. He folded his hands, settling them down into his lap. “No Healer went anywhere without a Guardian with dem. Now, dey weren’t bonded, not like y’ two, but we’ll get to dat in a bit. First, let me finish explaining about Guardians and deir purpose. To be a Guardian was an important job. A calling, y’ could say. Not everyone could be one. Dey had to have de spirit in dem, and dey had to have de strength and de will. Deir training was more dan any Assassin or Thief ever went through. Often, dey trained with de other Guilds and den were sent on. Guardians were considered de elite fighters. Dey had to be, see. A Guardian’s job was to protect Healers at all costs. Y’ve probably seen how healing can drain y’.” He looked to Spencer, who gave a nod. “A major healing can leave a Healer drained to varying degrees and in dat time, dey can be vulnerable.”

They’d both seen the truth of that. Spencer thought of how drained he’d felt after healing all those people at the bomb site and how long he’d had to sleep afterwards just to recover.

Jean Luc wasn’t done yet. “Guardians weren’t just fo’ physical protection, though.” He told them. “All Healers were slightly empathic to some degree or another. It’s part of what marked dem as Healers instead of just someone able to heal. As y’ know, de empathy is both a blessing and a curse. It allows dem to do so much, yet it also leaves dem vulnerable. Dey can take on too many negative things when healing someone and it weakens dem even more. After a healing, deir walls aren’t as strong in deir minds and dey need to strengthen dem. Dat’s what deir partner is dere fo’. Dey shelter dem, keep dem safe, until dey can protect demselves again. If dey’ve lost a patient, t’ings are even more dangerous. Dere’s always de risk dat dey won’t pull back enough from someone dat’s dying and dey might get caught in de sensation of death. Dere’s nothing more dangerous fo’ an empath.”

A shudder ran down Spencer's body. That was something that he already knew on his own, very well. The chill that filled him at just the memory was enough to have him trying to scoot instinctively closer to Remy. In response to the movement and to what he felt in their bond, Remy lifted an arm and tucked it around Spencer's shoulders, tugging him in close. “Penny?”

Remy’s warmth wrapped around Spencer in every way, pushing back the cold, and Spencer leaned in a little more. He almost felt embarrassed by his reaction; almost, but not quite. When he looked up, he saw Jean Luc looking at him with sympathy. “Y’ve felt it b’fore.” It was a statement, not a question.

Shivering, Spencer nodded. He felt Remy’s arm tighten around him and he was glad for it. The memory wasn’t a fond one at all. “I’ve felt death a lot. In my line of work, it was inevitable. And hospitals…you can’t help but feel it. Those are bad, but I learned to cope. I learned ways to deal with it.” One of which had been to never go alone. If the person was already dead, it wasn’t so bad, though the absence of emotion was extremely unsettling to him. But if someone was still alive, if they were dying, if he went into a hospital, he’d learned to bring someone with him that he could safely anchor on to keep himself grounded. “But I’ve only been really caught up in it twice. Once, when I was a teenager, and again on a case. It’s…it’s like being filled with this, this freezing darkness.” His body gave a shiver in remembrance and his eyes went slightly distant. “Like there’s this dark void that threatens to swallow everything you are. It pulls at you and it takes away everything good, everything _warm_. It took weeks for me to feel warm again…”

His voice trailed off and his body gave another shiver. Remy drew him in even closer and brought his other arm over to wrap around Spencer. For the moment their story was forgotten. Even Jean Luc was forgotten. Remy turned his full attention to Spencer as he gathered him as close as he could on the couch. One hand stroked back his hair, brushing past it to cup Spencer's cheek. “Hey, hey.” He gave Spencer's face a small shake to draw his attention. “C’mon, cher. Don’t go drifting off t’inking bout dat. Y’ stay here wit’ me, y’ hear? Focus on us, Penny.”

The warmth of their bond grew a little more and pushed back against the remembered chill. Spencer drew it in, letting it fill him, letting it chase away the dark, and he sighed into Remy’s embrace. “Thank you.”

“Y’ okay now, cher?”

Spencer pressed his cheek in against Remy’s palm and nodded. “I’m fine. Let’s keep going.”

“Are y’ sure?” Remy asked. He stroked his thumb over Spencer's cheekbone and wrapped his partner in warm emotions. “We can take a lil break if y’ need it. Y’r starting to feel a bit raw inside.”

Yeah, no kidding. That was a good word for how Spencer felt. Taking a little break wasn’t going to make it better, though. His mind wasn’t going to stop thinking over all of this just because they weren’t talking about it. Better to just get it done and over with. Once he had all the information—even if some of it sounded so utterly _ridiculous_ —then he’d be able to better think things out. “No, it’s fine. I’m fine.” To prove his point, he drew his face from Remy’s hand and turned back to face Jean Luc once more. “Please, continue.”

It galled at him a little that Jean Luc looked to Remy and waited for his nod before he continued on. He let it slide, though. There were more important things to focus on.

Jean Luc picked is story back up as if there hadn’t even been in interruption. “Guardians and Healers were always paired together and linked to deir partner.” He told them. “Now, remember, a lot of dis is just legend, stories dat’ve been passed down over de years. No one’s quite sure how much of it is true anymore. But de stories say dat once a Guardian found deir Healer, dey’d go through some kind of ceremony and a link would be created between dem. Not one like what y’ two share, but an empathic link. One dat would allow dem to share emotion and strength between each other and one dat would allow dem to find each other if, fo’ some reason, dey became separated. De link would let a Guardian monitor his Healer’s wellbeing and known when dey were distressed or in trouble.”

Now that was something that sounded familiar, and that didn’t sound as make-believe as the rest of this. “That sounds like a basic empathic link. Any empath could create that for two people.” Spencer said.

“What about our bond? Dat aint no simple empathic link.” Remy pointed out. “Ours wasn’t even a conscious choice. I didn’t know him when we linked. Hell, I was fighting off dis Protector in me b’fore I even knew who exactly I was wanting to protect!”

“Dere’s even less facts about bonded pairs dan dere is about de Guild.” Jean Luc admitted, shrugging at them and giving them an apologetic look. “I know dat wasn’t what y’ wanted to hear. But what we’ve heard says dat a pairing like yours was considered very, very rare. Some of de stories say dat only de Guild leaders bonded like dis. Dat it’s how dey were chosen to be leader. Other stories say dat Healers and Guardians were created by making a deal with someone powerful, hundreds and hundreds of years ago, and dat whoever made dem, made de bonded pair to watch out fo’ all de others. Others still say dat it’s what happens when a Guardian and Healer are true soul mates. Deir souls recognize one another even b’fore dey do. But no one knows fo’ sure exactly what’s true. All dat information was kept private with de Healers, de same as any other Guild. We don’t share our histories.”

Remy was nodding in agreement. There was a lot that he knew, stories he’d been raised with once he’d been taken in by Jean Luc, things that he’d been taught as part of his training that those outside the Guild would never know. Their history was a private, important thing, and it wasn’t to be shared lightly. There were secrets there he’d protect to the death. It made sense that the most important things about the Healers Guild wouldn’t be known. At least, it made sense to him. To Spencer, it was frustrating, and all just a little insane. These stories seemed more like folktales than anything else! Stories that had been passed down and twisted over through time. Just a lot of ‘we don’t know’ wrapped up in ‘maybe’ and ‘supposedly’. Nothing actually concrete.

A soft sigh slipped from Spencer. “So what you’re saying is that we may never know all the answers, then.” His shoulders slumped slightly and his eyes dropped down. He’d been hoping for more than just stories. What exactly he’d wanted, he wasn’t sure. But he’d hoped for more than _this_. “If the Guild is gone,” _if it even existed_ “there’s no one left to pass that information along. No one who knows the stories.”

“Maybe. Maybe not.” Jean Luc said gently.

That had Remy’s gaze snapping to him. He knew his Papa and he knew that tone. The man knew something. “What aren’t y’ telling us, Papa?”

For a long beat the man just stared at the two of them. Spencer found himself sitting up just a little bit straighter. Were they finally going to get a straight answer on something? Or a concrete lead? He waited eagerly as Jean Luc looked from Remy to Spencer and back again. Then, in a carefully modulated tone, he finally spoke. “De old Healer Guild houses, most of dem are gone. De little ones here and dere were torn down and built over. But dere’s one left, what y’d call de Main House, so to speak. It’s said dere’s a library in dere dat has de history y’r looking fo’.”

Spencer couldn’t speak. He just sat there and stared, unable to take this in. This was what they had to offer? _This_ was what he brought to them? These…these _stories_ and legends about an ancient group of healers? The way he spoke, he made it sound like they were some great group that had apparently been wiped out somehow. How, he wasn’t saying. Spencer hadn’t failed to notice that _that_ part of the history was suspiciously absent from this storytelling. It all made for a great story, but there was no way this was their life. Absolutely no way that this was who they were. Wrapped up in his shock and disbelief, his denial, Spencer didn’t even notice Remy’s concern growing, or the way the man kept watching him, the worried look in his eyes getting stronger.

However, his father noticed, though he mistook the reasoning. He assumed they were just having troubles with the amount of information that was thrown at them in such a short time. This hadn’t been how he’d wanted to do this but there had been no other way. His own gaze was apologetic when he turned it towards his son. “I know dis is a lot to take in, Remy. I wouldn’t have just thrown it all at y’ like dis if I had de time to do it right. I wanted to take m’ time and explain it all to you bit by bit, so you’d have time to take it in. But y’ got people coming after y’ two.” His expression turned slightly exasperated. “And y’r wife’s at de top of de list.”

Wait a second—what? That snapped Spencer out of his other train of thought and he went completely and utterly still. Had he heard him right? Had Jean Luc just said ‘your wife’? A _wife_? What was he talking about? Remy and Rogue weren’t married, and she was the girl Remy had been with before Spencer came along. Hell, those two weren’t even together anymore!

Spencer's shock must not have been noticeable on the outside because Jean Luc was still talking, heedless of the turmoil inside of the young genius. “She’ll be here soon and y’ know y’r usual hiding places won’t work. Y’ll either have to go hide out somewhere new, or dig in at de mansion an hope fo’ de best. Belle’s determined to get to y’ b’fore anyone else does.”

Belle. He had a name now; Belle. This woman, this Belle, was apparently Remy’s wife. Remy was fucking _married_. The shock faded away as hurt hit Spencer like a tidal wave. It was so strong, it slipped past his shields and into the room around him. Jean Luc’s eyes shot to Spencer with surprise and concern. Remy had already been moving, having felt the shock and then the hurt right alongside Spencer. He reached out towards him and was stunned when Spencer flinched back from him. “Don’t touch me.” Spencer snapped furiously. He glared hotly at Remy, hurt quickly transforming to anger, and he shoved up off the couch.

It wasn’t that often that Spencer really felt this angry. He’d felt hurt countless times in his life, but he’d never had hurt so quickly transform to anger. An anger he couldn’t quite control. It roared through him, shattering his control, taking away his usual reservations. He was angry enough that he actually felt a small flash of satisfaction when he saw Remy wince when he felt his emotions.

Remy pushed off the couch as well, rising carefully with his hands held out in a peaceful gesture. “Spencer, just listen to me. Dis aint what y’ t’ink, all right.”

“Not what I think?” Spencer demanded. “You have a wife, Remy. A damn _wife_! I only have a few hard rules about relationships, and one of them is that I won’t sleep with _married men_!”

“Spencer, cher…” He extended one hand in a silent sort of plea.

“How dare you?” Spencer cut in, fury and hurt layered in every word. His control was slipping with his emotion and so, without his meaning to, his empathy added an extra punch to the words so that they weren’t just heard but were _felt_ as well. “No matter what the circumstances are, did you not stop even once to think that I had the right to know that you were married _before_ I slept with you?”

Remy’s expression looked agonized, though it was nothing compared to what was in their bond. His emotions were raw and open and aching. In a better frame of mind, Spencer would’ve recognized just how upset Remy looked and how out of character it was for him. He would’ve seen just how badly his anger was hurting his partner, how it was like an actual, physical attack for him. But spencer was too caught up in his own feelings and his own pain. He brought his hands up and clenched at his hair. “I can’t take this. This is…this is too much right now. Mystical bonds, centuries old Guilds, a damn _quest_ to find a mysterious Guild house no one’s even sure how to find—that’s a hell of a lot to swallow. But let’s not forget that one of the people hunting us is apparently my bondmate’s _wife,_ who I didn’t even know existed until five minutes ago.”

“ _Je suis désolé_ , Penny.” Remy said softly. “I know…”

“Stop.” He held up one hand, palm out towards them in a plea for silence. When it fell quiet, he drew his hand in and pinched the bridge of his nose.  “I need to think. I just, I’m going to go take a shower. Alone.” He added that last part on, giving Remy a firm look to make sure that he understood. Then, without waiting any more, he spun on his heel and hurried down the hall, leaving an agonized Remy and a stunned Jean Luc behind.


	29. Chapter 29

Remy wasn’t sure how long he stood there for. His attention wasn’t on anything around him. It was all internal, feeling what was in their bond, agonizing over the strength of the emotions there. Sometimes it was so easy to forget just how strongly Spencer really felt things. Even with their bond, it was still easy to forget, because most of the time Spencer kept his emotions bottled down so tight even _he_ didn’t notice them completely. He was doing it less and less, true. Remy liked to think that Spencer felt safe enough around him to just let himself feel. Those were just his average, everyday emotions, though. Not—this. This was so different. This was hurt, anger, confusion, disbelief, all underscored by fear that was flirting heavily with panic. These emotions were strong and real, right there in your face, and they were the ones that Spencer couldn’t control and that he didn’t understand. These were the things he’d never been able to feel or express before. Remy didn’t know a lot about Spencer's childhood, but there were a lot of things that weren’t hard to figure out.

When a hand touched his shoulder, Remy reacted instinctively, lashing out quickly and snatching it by the wrist. The only thing that saved Jean Luc from injury was his quick reflexes and the fact that he knew quite a few of his son’s moves. He twisted his hand and broke free just before any damage could be done. A sharp “Remy!” served to snap the young Cajun back to reality.

A grimace crossed Remy’s face when he realized what he’d almost done. “ _Désolé_ , Papa.”

“ _C’est bien, mon fils._ I should’ve known better.” Now that he knew Remy was alert and coherent, he touched his arm again. “Come on, come sit down. Y’ look like a statue dere.”

Remy shuddered a little under the touch before he could stop himself. He let his Papa lead him over to the couch, though. When he got there he sank down onto the corner cushion and used all his training and control to sit as casually as possible even though his insides felt as if they were being cup apart by a dull razor. Spencer's pain and anger was agony for him. The anger was like a steady pounding in his skull, a headache he couldn’t get rid of. He knew that the anger wasn’t all for him. It wasn’t even all for Belle. Spencer was smart enough to have figured out that there had to be more to the story than this and he knew Remy well enough to know he’s not a cheater. Once he had a minute to think, Remy was sure the logical part of Spencer's brain would reassert itself and point all those very things out to him.

“Are y’ okay, Remy?” Jean Luc asked softly. He’d taken the seat next to Remy and was turned toward him to better be able to talk to him and watch his face. This was how they’d talked countless times in the past.

He took a few deep breaths to steady himself and to push the pain down as far as he could. He could hold out against this. He could! Spencer would relax soon and these sensations would go away. Remy tried to focus on his father to distract himself while he waited to be able to breathe normally again. “I’ll be all right, Papa. Don’t worry.”

“I didn’t realize y’ hadn’t told him about Belle yet. If I’d known, I would’ve left it to y’ to tell. Though,” The older man gave his son a sharp look here. “He is right in dat y’ should’ve told him b’fore y’ two were together, Remy.”

This time Remy’s grimace wasn’t from the pain in the bond. “I know, I know.” There was no denying that. Spencer had every right to be pissed off that he didn’t know the man he was with had a wife. To someone who didn’t know the whole story, this whole thing had to look really, really bad. If he’d taken the time to tell Spencer about this beforehand, just explained even the basics of it all, he had no doubt that the young genius would’ve understood. “I’ll explain it to him and he’ll understand. I know he will. All I need is five minutes.”

Jean Luc gave him a slightly skeptical look. “I don’t know, son. He was pretty angry with y’.”

“Course he was. Spencer don’t feel not’ing halfway.” Remy said. He felt Spencer's emotions shift once more, felt some of the anger start to fade just the slightest. The confusion and disbelief grew, as did the pain and fear. The combination left Remy feeling nauseous. He had to swallow a few times to keep his stomach from trying to empty itself. He tightened his muscles and tried to ride it out and focus again on the conversation. Anything to distract him from this feeling. “It aint jus’ dis t’ing wit’ Belle dat’s getting to him. It’s all dis.”

“What do y’ mean?”

“Y’ gotta realize, Spencer's got one of de most logical minds I’ve ever seen. He lives in a world of logic and science, Papa. Facts and numbers and statistics. Dat’s where he’s most comfortable. Dat’s where he feels _safe_. All dis, it’s so far out his comfort zone he don’t know how de hell to handle it, an he don’t know how to deal wit’ all dat.”

One elegant eyebrow arched in a gesture Remy had seen countless times over the years when he’d said something his father considered ridiculous. “So he lashes out at y’?” Jean Luc asked. His tone left no doubt as to his opinion of that.

Oh, great, this was all he needed. His father mad at his bondmate. Remy hurried to try and correct what Jean Luc was thinking. “It aint as bad as it seems. I was just de convenient outlet. Oh, _oui_ , he’s mad at me, don’t get me wrong. _Bon Dieu_ is he mad. An he’s got dat right. But if it hadn’t been me and dis, it would’ve been somet’ing else. He don’t handle being outta control all dat well and dis right here has him feeling like all his control’s been ripped right away from him.”

All of a sudden Remy’s words cut off and with a suppressed groan he clenched his hands tighter; so tight, his knuckles went white. Jean Luc leaned in a little, reaching out to touch before stopping himself as he remembered how Remy had flinched under his touch before. He curled his fingers in and forced himself to draw his hand back; it felt so strange to do. Remy was very tactile and it felt odd to think of _not_ touching him for comfort. Instead, he had to settle for words, asking, “What is it?”

“He’s hurting.” Remy said roughly. He felt Spencer's emotion swell and had to close his eyes against it. “He’s scared and angry and jus’, jus’ hurting, and I wanna go in dere. _Dieu_ , Papa, I wanna go in dere.”

“He told y’ he wanted to be alone.” Jean Luc reminded him softly.

“ _Je sais_!” He knew that! Of course he knew that. But it didn’t take away from what he wanted to do. It felt wrong to be out here while Spencer was back there hurting and upset. Remy curled his arms around himself and tried to keep a lock on the emotions bubbling under the surface. What he wanted to do more than anything else was just go back there and grab Spencer and demand he give him a chance to explain this. He knew Spencer's mind; if the man took just a minute to listen to what Remy had to say, he would understand. But he had to work past his emotions before he’d be capable of listening.

Until then, Remy was left out here, fighting off not only his feelings, but what Spencer was feeling as well. It wasn’t working too well. Their bond had started to feel so much stronger since last night, and even more so this morning, but now it felt tight, almost strained, like there was something wrong with it. Like when they started to get too far apart and it began to get strained, only this time it wasn’t a physical distance they had, it was a mental one, an emotional one, and that seemed so much worse.

Remy couldn’t really ignore any of what Spencer was feeling. His emotions were bleeding over strongly, blending in with what Remy was feeling until he was having a hard time separating the two, unsure if what he felt was really his emotion or not. In the end, it didn’t matter. He was reacting like the emotions were his own and that was all that counted. His stomach was clenching, his head was aching, the pain was shredding through him, and he wanted to just race back there and find Spencer and hold and be held. It was getting so that he couldn’t even keep it all inside the way he usually did. He couldn’t control his body. It was curling inwards as if to protect against what was hurting. Only, what hurt was inside of him and there was no escaping it.

Surprise echoed over to him followed quickly by sorrow and an enormous wave of guilt. Followed quickly on the tail of that was a lessening in the other emotions and a familiar twist of emotions that had Remy’s head snapping up. He knew what those emotions meant.

His quick movement startled his father and Jean Luc forgot his resolve to keep his hands to himself. He put a hand on Remy’s arm and asked “What is it? What’s wrong?”

Remy didn’t even think about it as he shrugged away from Jean Luc’s hand. He didn’t think about how that might hurt the man. It was more of a subconscious move; at the moment, something inside of him wanted no other touch than that of his bondmate. Anything else just felt wrong. He started to uncurl his body from the couch even as he answered his father’s question. “I gotta go. He’s callin’ me back dere.”

“I didn’t know telepathy was part of the bond.”

“It aint.” Remy said, already rising to his feet. “Y’d be surprised how much y’ can say wit’ y’r emotions. Dat’s what he sends when he needs me to come to him. I’m gonna go an handle dis. Y’ t’ink y’ can give us a bit? Dis may get loud.”

“ _Mais oui_.”

Remy barely heard his answer. He was already halfway down the hall, following the call of his partner. He didn’t see his father still sitting on the couch watching him go with a look of love, bemusement, and worry.

CXCX

All he was thinking about was getting the hell out of that room. Spencer didn’t stop to ask where the bathroom was or if it was even set up for him to take a shower. For all he knew, the water wasn’t even on! He didn’t care. He just needed to get some privacy and get away from all that…all that _whatever_ it was. This whole day was insane. Just one insanity right after the other. He needed a sense of stability. When he found the bathroom, he almost fell inside in his eagerness to get in there and away from everything and everyone. The door slammed shut behind him and he fell against it with a sigh. Taking a deep breath, he turned himself around so his back was pressed to the wood, his head thumping against it. Dammit. This was not how he’d expected his day to go. Not after such a beautiful night. Dammit!

No one wanted to discover that the person they’d slept with, someone they cared about a whole hell of a lot, was already  _married_. Spencer had been that route before. He wasn’t ever going to do it again. There was no way he was going to let himself be the person someone cheats with. One time in life was enough for him. Ever since then, he'd made sure to never be a part of something like that again. He'd been so sure he was safe with Remy, too! The man had been dating Rogue when they met and no one at the house had seemed to think it strange. None of them acted like he was cheating on his wife by being with her!

 _Remy’s not the cheating type_ A voice in Spencer's mind pointed out. _A lover, yes. He’s never made shy about his past lovers. So why never mention a wife?_

That was the question, wasn't it? A question he should’ve taken the time to ask. Spencer knew he’d overreacted. He’d known it even as he was doing it. He just hadn’t been able to stop himself. But now some of his anger was finally starting to die away. As it did, other thoughts slipped in. Other questions. Why had Remy never mentioned his wife? Why did no one at the mansion mention her? Was it because they didn't know about her? Or was there some story here, something that he didn't know?

Spencer lifted a hand and ran it over his face. This was all just too much. How was a person supposed to think with all of this going on? The story that Jean Luc had told them was still playing over and over in Spencer's mind. It bounced around against his skull as he pushed away from the door and went over to the sink. His hands clenched on the edges of it and he hung his head for a moment. This was all just insane! How the hell was a person supposed to think with so much in their heads? Usually when really stressed out it just took a meditation session to help him calm himself and organize his thoughts enough to start seeing the pattern there. But usually he was just thinking hard about a case, or about a problem that seemed hard in his life but was really simple. This was so much more than that. This was like trying to take a fairy tale and make it fit real life. Spencer doubted he’d be able to even get into a meditative state right at the moment.

Dammit! Jerking away from the sink, Spencer started to strip out of his clothes, throwing them almost violently into the corner. When he was stripped down he went to the shower and yanked the knob to turn the water on. He set it as hot as he could stand it and then flipped it over to the shower and climbed inside. He yanked so hard on the curtain to shut it he almost ripped it off its hooks.

He stood underneath the spray of the shower and let the water wash over his head. It ran down into his face, blinding him, and that was fine. He didn’t want to see anything right now. He didn’t want to feel anything. His head was throbbing from the tension headache. Damn this situation and damn his empathy for making it harder to deal with. It had been hard enough before he’d bonded with Remy; controlling his empathy then had been a difficult thing to do sometimes. People thought that Spencer didn’t feel things like everyone else, that he didn’t feel as much as they did, when in reality he’d always been fighting so hard not to feel things too strongly. Since his bonding and since his growth in powers, it was getting harder and harder to deal with emotions because they were so much more. He felt everything so much stronger than other people. He could honestly say that because he knew how other people felt. He could feel the strength of their emotions. What he felt in comparison to others was just so much _more_. Not for the first time, Spencer cursed his empathy. Right now he should be trying to think logically, not emotionally.

To make it even more difficult, memories were trying to push forward, old things he didn’t want to think about. Memories of the last time he’d been with someone and found out that he was married. Spencer had been so sure that Ollie had been the one for him. With all the ardor of his twenty year old heart, he’d loved the man even though they never said it. And then one afternoon he’d been getting money from Ollie’s wallet, just like he’d asked, and he had found the family photo in there. Ollie, his wife, and his two kids. The fight that had happened next was one that Spencer would always remember. It got even worse when he found out that, not only did Ollie have a whole other family, his wife actually knew about Spencer. Knew and was _okay with it_! Spencer was basically his little gay outlet; a person for him to use to get these urges out with so that, when it was over, he could return to his happy little life with his happy little wife.

The pain of that memory had Spencer bowing his head and squeezing his eyes shut. He braced his hands against the shower wall and took a few ragged breaths as the old, familiar pan of that washed over him, and then he gathered up all his control and shoved those memories far, far away. They were done and over with and they had no bearing on things right now. Absolutely none. So what if Remy hadn’t told him that he was married—it didn’t mean this was anything like _that_ situation.

Water ran down his head, pushing his hair down into his face and making a screen between him and the world. He bowed his head even more and tried to focus on drawing breath in and blowing it back out.

Not once had anyone ever hinted that Remy might be married. Rogue had never said it and Lord knew she would’ve thrown it up in his face if she had known. Logan would’ve said something, too, if he had known. At least, if it was important. But maybe what he’d been thinking earlier was right. Maybe there was more to this story. Remy was an honorable person. He wasn’t a liar and Spencer refused to believe he was a cheater. He cared too much about other people to deliberately set out to hurt anyone. Even if he had, there would’ve been some form of guilt in him. Spencer remembered feeling that guilt in Ollie even if he hadn’t known what it was at the time. Not once had he felt anything like that from Remy. _I’m missing something here, something important._

Spencer bent down and shut the water off without ever trying to wash himself up. He didn’t even notice the little hotel style shampoo and body wash on the edge of the tub. Caught up in his thoughts, he didn’t even think about it as he grabbed a folded towel off the bathroom shelf and brought it down to wrap around himself. If he’d been thinking clearly, he would’ve thought it strange that this little safe house was so well stocked, and he would’ve wondered about who had done it. But he was too caught up in his thoughts that, as so often happened, the real world was barely noticed.

 _I’m missing something important_ , he thought again. He wrapped the towel around his waist and scowled at himself. _If I hadn’t flown off the handle, Remy might’ve explained it to me. He was trying to say something out there and I just kept cutting him off._ If he’d looked past his own hurt, he might’ve gotten some answers. Instead, he’d been selfish, unable to think of anything but the fact that his partner, his bondmate—someone that he’d come to think of as ‘ _his_ ’, period—belonged to someone else.

Thinking of that brought to mind the image of Remy standing there watching him with pain written openly on his face. Spencer actually flinched as he remembered that. Jesus. How had he not seen that?

It was as if thinking about that finally brought his attention back to his partner. For the first time since he’d come in here, Spencer noticed the throbbing in their bond and he froze in the process of drying off his leg. Remy?

The pain that Remy was feeling crashed into him and Spencer actually doubled over underneath it all. His knees buckled and he dropped down to the ground with a low thump. One hand braced on the ground, Spencer dove inside himself, trying to find out what was wrong, what was going on. When he saw what it was his heart gave a throb. Him? _He_ was causing this pain for Remy? Guilt and sorrow slammed into Spencer and he clenched his eyes shut against the tears that welled up in his eyes. _Oh, Remy, I’m so sorry._ He hadn’t once stopped to think about what his emotions must be doing to his partner. How the hell could he have been so stupid?

Spencer gathered his strength and shoved himself up off the ground. While his body went through the motions of drying and dressing, he worked on tampering down his own emotions, shoving them down where they wouldn’t be able to hurt Remy anymore. Then, just as he was pulling on his undershirt, he sent out that familiar twist of emotions, a sensation that he knew Remy would recognize as their version of ‘come here, please’. He felt Remy’s surprise and felt the agreement that was sent back to him.

He gathered up his over shirt, opting not to put it on, and then he slipped out of the bathroom in bare feet and he went down the hall to the other door he’d noticed earlier that he’d assumed led to a bedroom. He was right. The room had a bed in it, made up with dark blue generic bedding, and it had a dresser, but nothing else. Spencer set his over shirt and socks on the bed, tucked his shoes underneath it, and then he strolled over to the window to wait for Remy. It take but a minute before the man joined him. Though Spencer stayed facing the window, he felt and heard Remy come in the room. There was the soft sound of the door shutting and then nothing.

Silence hung over the room like a heavy cloud. Neither man seemed all that willing to break it. They stood on opposite sides and each waited for the other to say or do something to get this started. Spencer resolutely kept his eyes on the window. He knew if he looked over at Remy, if he had to see his face, his eyes, there was no way he’d be able to stay strong enough to get the answers that he needed. He’d break down, he knew it. He'd break down and rush over to him and climb into his arms where everything was safe and easy. To make sure he got the answers he wanted, he kept his eyes firmly on the window, but he did break just enough to be the one to speak first. Something told him that, if he wanted this started, he had to be the one to do it. So he asked one single, simple question. "Why didn't you tell me you were married?" 

Just as he'd hoped, his soft words started the ball rolling. Remy didn't even hesitate before answering. "Because I honestly don't t'ink about it no more." 

“How can you  _not think about it_?” 

“I’ve only seen her t’ree or four times since de wedding." Remy told him quietly. "De day I married her was de day I was banished from New Orleans. I aint allowed back dere and she still lives dere.” 

That was enough to finally make Spencer turn around. He spun and his head shot up, eyes wide with surprise. “Wait, wait, wait. What?” 

He'd been right in thinking that he would crack at the sight of Remy. Just seeing the man was like a jolt of lightning straight through all of Spencer's defenses. Remy still stood over by the door and he just looked so--wrong. His body was tense, defensive, and his arms were wrapped around his waist in a gesture that was more like Spencer than like him. His eyes were bright and locked right on Spencer. As soon as their gazes met, there was no looking away, no turning back to the window. He was caught there in those brightly glowing depths. “It aint a happy story.” Remy warned him.

He wanted to tell Remy it was okay, he didn’t have to say anything. He wanted to tell him he didn’t have to talk about him if it hurt. But he didn’t. He _had_ to know. “Okay.”

Spencer stood there and listened as Remy told in flat, short sentences about their courtship, how they were supposed to be destined to unite the guilds together with their marriage, about how he was challenged by her brother at their wedding to a duel that was fought to the death, and about how he was banished once he won. “We kept our vows to keep de peace,  _mais_  we’re married in name only, Spencer. Dis aint been no real marriage. She has her own partner down dere and she aint never cared bout me finding mine. Belle and I, we’re  _amis_. Least, when she aint trying to kill me. She can’t never decide which she wants more.”

That revelation left a stunned sort of silence over the room. Spencer had no idea what to say or what to do. Everything he’d just heard was rattling around in his head. Most prominent of all was this slowly growing ache he felt inside. An ache that was matched by his anger. But he wasn’t angry at Remy anymore, he was angry _for_ him.

Remy watched the play of expressions across Spencer's face and seemed to see something there. His body eased just a little and he broke away from the wall, making his way across the room. He stopped just inches in front of Spencer, almost crowding him but not quite, and he lifted one hand to ever so gently tuck a bit of Spencer's hair behind his ear. “I wasn’t keeping her from y’ to hurt y’, Penny. I should’ve told y’ and I’m sorry fo’ dat.”

Emotion clogged Spencer's throat. He had to swallow twice before he could find his voice. “I’m sorry too.” His eyes stayed down, not quite able to make himself look up at Remy’s face. This was hard enough as it was. “I overreacted. I never should’ve blown at you that way and I shouldn’t have taken out my anger at everything else on you.”

“Least y’ let it out dis time instead of shutting it all down.”

“Better shut it all down than take it out on you.” Spencer whispered.

A long finger curled underneath his chin and tipped his face up. Remy’s gaze was bright when it locked on Spencer's. “Don’t say dat.” He told him hotly. “Don’t y’ ever say dat. Y’ t’ink I don’t know how much it hurts y’ when y’ gotta shut down like dat? I aint like de other people in y’r life, Spencer Reid. I don’t want a robot. I want y’ to feel and express y’rself. If it hurts sometimes, well, it hurts. We’ll deal wit’ it. I can take a lil bit of hurt.”

“I don’t like hurting you.”

“An I don’t like being hurt.” Remy said agreeably. “So next time, let’s say y’ stay an talk instead of storming away. _Mais_ I aint gonna listen to y’ say dat y’d rather let y’rself be hurt dan me. Maybe dat’s how t’ings worked wit’ y’ and everyone else y’ ever known; it aint working dat way wit’ us. Y’ aint m’ punching bag, y’ aint m’ dumping ground. Y’r m’ partner. We take care of each other equally in dis.”

Emotion welled up inside of Spencer and choked off his voice. Gratitude, happiness, stunned disbelief, and affection that was growing stronger and stronger every day they were together. He gathered them up and opened himself up to Remy so that his partner could feel all the things that he couldn’t say. He knew Remy felt it when he saw the happiness light his eyes and then the man was leaning down and kissing him so sweetly that it washed away everything else.

Their kiss broke and Spencer found himself being pulled forward and tucked in close against his chest. Sighing, content, he wrapped his arms around Remy’s waist in return and held on tight. Being here in Remy’s arms made everything just a little bit easier. He’d been an idiot to walk away from Remy to try and think about things. When was he going to start remembering that he didn’t have to do it on his own all the time anymore? That it was actually easier to do it with Remy? Spencer sighed out a breath and let himself melt in to Remy a little bit more. His head rested against Remy’s shoulder, forehead pressed just against Remy’s jawline, and Remy wrapped him up a little bit more in response. Surrounded by his bondmate and breathing easier than he had since Jean Luc had first showed up, Spencer turned his mind to their real problems. The first thing he thought of to say was, “Do you believe it?”

He felt Remy’s shoulder twitch like he’d been about to shrug before thinking better of it. “I grew up wit’ dis kind of t’ing, cher. It’s easy fo’ me to believe it. An Papa, he wouldn’t be bringing it if he didn’t believe it.”

That had been the answer Spencer expected. He had known that Remy would be having an easier time believing this story than he was. Spencer wanted to argue, to point out all the things that were wrong with this, but he made himself think instead of just reacting. Just reacting hadn’t worked out well for him at all. He needed to do what he did best—think and apply some form of logic to this. Almost reluctantly, he said “It _would_ explain why Charles never came up with anything. No one would talk to him about something like this.”

“De Guilds survive on deir secrecy.” Remy said agreeably.

“This just…it all feels so unrealistic!” His hands clenched in the back of Remy’s shirt for a moment as he fought to keep himself calm. There was no way he was going to freak out again. _Calm. Calm, controlled, and logical. Think practical things._ “What are we going to do, Remy? We’ve got people after us. Quite a few, from the sounds of it. An they don’t sound friendly.”

One of Remy’s hands stroked over Spencer's back while the other slid into his hair as it always did when they were in any kind of stressed moment. “We need to figure out who all’s after us, first. We can’t really plan not’ing till we know what we’re up against.”

“No, not first.” Spencer disagreed. “First, we need to find a secure place to hide out. More secure than this.”

“Y’ don’t wanna go to de mansion?”

He pulled back just enough to look up at Remy and raise an eyebrow at him. “Do you think we’d be safe there, or would we just be putting our friends at risk?”

Remy nodded his head. “Y’ got a point.” With the hand in Spencer's hair, he pulled his head back down and tucked it against his neck once more. “Well, I can find us somewhere to go, dat aint no problem.”

“Once we’re there, we can start making calls of our own, putting out our own feelers like we should’ve been doing from the start. We need to gather information and then we can start making appropriate plans.” With only a small sigh for regret, Spencer drew back from Remy’s embrace, though not completely out of his arms.

A silly little grin touched Remy’s lips and had Spencer giving him a strange look. “What?”

“Not’ing.” Remy said quickly. He tried to smother the smile only to have it slip out once more. “I’m just enjoying watching y’ take charge, dat’s all. It’s kinda sexy.”

“Oh, be quiet.” Spencer said, cheeks heating. But he was smiling, too. “We’ve got a lot to do, LeBeau. Let’s get started.”


	30. Chapter 30

Things moved quickly once the two men got out of the bedroom. It took no time at all for Remy to make arrangements for a real safe house for them. Within the half hour they were leaving this apartment and were on their way. The group split up in what was considered a necessary precaution. Remy and Spencer went one way while Jean Luc and his thieves went another. Jean Luc wasn’t that fond of the idea and he wasn’t shy about letting them know that; he worried about the two being on their own without anyone to help them in case someone did find them before they got back together. Spencer simple comment of “I trust Remy to keep us safe” had earned him a kiss and a look of thanks and happiness from Remy. Nothing else was said about their separating.

It took a little over an hour before they finally reached the place that was going to be their sort of base of operations for the next little while. It was a little three bedroom, two story house in Queens, just a plain looking house much like any other on the street. The neighborhood looked like one that wasn’t quite the best, which worked in their favor because it meant it was one were people wouldn’t bat an eye at the small group suddenly moving in. They wouldn’t create any unnecessary stir.

They were careful on their way there, even more so than they’d been coming to this last place. Spencer didn’t comment on it at all. He had put his trust in Remy and he wasn’t going to take that back. If Remy thought this was necessary, he would believe him. Remy was more likely to understand who was coming for them than Spencer would.

The place was furnished, yet another thing that Spencer didn’t ask about. He was too busy celebrating when he found that the kitchen had a coffee pot and, oh thank God, coffee. Remy showed it to him with a smirk that grew into a grin at Spencer's thrilled look. “I called a friend and had dem run over and stock a few t’ings fo’ us.” Remy explained while he set about starting the pot of coffee.

“Must be some friend.” Spencer said wryly, seating himself at the kitchen table. “It’s only been sixty three minutes since we decided to go to a new place.”

Remy nodded agreeably. He was pouring water into the back of the coffee maker. “She is. Y’d like her, I t’ink. When we get t’ings cleared up, we should invite her and her woman over fo’ dinner. Dey’re sickeningly sweet _mais_ dey’re fun, so dat makes up fo’ it.”

“I think we should try and handle all of this before we start making plans for dinner parties, Remy.”

That earned him a bright grin. Slapping the lid shut and flipping the switch, Remy finally turned away from the coffee maker and faced Spencer. He strolled up to him and tipped Spencer's chin up so he could steal a quick kiss. Even with as new as the physical part of this relationship was, it felt so natural. They both smiled when the kiss broke. Remy lightly pinched his chin and then let go so he could step back and drop into the chair near Spencer's. “Y’r right, y’r right. We got a shitload of t’ings to get done. First t’ings first, we should probably call de house b’fore dey start looking fo’ us.”

Spencer held his hands up and sat back in his chair. “You can make that call.”

“Oh, _merci_. Y’r so kind.” Remy said sarcastically. But he pulled his phone out of his pocket. Looking down at it, he scowled. “Dey aint gonna like dis.”

“Yeah, I know.” To say the least. One thing Spencer had observed about the X-Men was that they seemed incapable of staying out of one another’s business. No matter what it was, all of them had to be involved in it. _All of them_. One person in particular Spencer knew was going to have quite the reaction to this whole thing. “Logan’s going to explode.”

“Logan?” Remy waved a hand dismissively. “Hell, he aint gonna explode. He’s just gonna hunt us down. It’s Scotty dat’s gonna explode. Dat vein in his jaw might finally burst.”

Spencer grimaced. “I’m not looking forward to that.”

There was a hint of amusement dancing in Remy’s eyes. The corner of his mouth twitched like he was fighting a smile. “Oh, I dunno. Might be in’eresting. Almost makes me wish I could be dere instead of doing it t’rough de phone.”

“You take too much pleasure in trying to irritate that man.”

“Y’ gotta take life’s pleasure where y’ can get it.”

“Hedonist.”

Laugher bubbled up from Remy. “Y’r damn straight.”

Something of the Imp that Remy usually called him was peeking through. Spencer had no idea if Remy’s inner good mood was rubbing off or if it was just a strange reaction to all of their stress. But he found himself arching an eyebrow at Remy and teasing “Last I checked I wasn’t.”

That only stopped Remy for a second. When he realized what Spencer meant, he started laughing again, the rich sounds echoing around the room. “ _Non,_ y’ aint, are y’? _Merci Dieu_ fo’ dat!” Abruptly, Remy looked up, and then he was quickly on his feet and moving. Spencer had no idea what it was that had alerted him but Remy quickly moved over towards the front room. Their bond was filled with an alert readiness that had Spencer drawing to his feet as well. Just a second later it relaxed. Then Remy was calling back “Papa’s here!”

“Oh, joy.” Spencer murmured under his breath. He sank back down into his chair. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Jean Luc; he didn’t know the man well enough to say if he liked him or not. What he did know about him was enough to have him wanting to like him. Remy spoke of him with such love in him. Anyone who earned that kind of love from Remy couldn’t be bad. It was just…he got the impression that Jean Luc wasn’t too fond of _him_. Not that he could really blame him. The man had been there for Spencer's little ‘tantrum’. When Spencer and Remy had come back out of the bedroom, Jean Luc had been all warm smiles for Remy, pleasant and agreeable to their plans, and for Spencer he’d been reserved and polite, never rude, just restrained. Like he was observing him and hadn’t quite made up his mind yet.

Spencer was just pushing out of his chair to head towards the coffee pot when he heard the front door open. He found a cupboard with mugs and pulled down three of them just in case.

The two LeBeaus walked into the kitchen as Spencer was pouring his own prepared cup. He looked up at them and lifted the pot a little. “Coffee, anyone?” Both men said yes, so Spencer poured into the other mugs as well. He took those over to the table first and set them down by where Remy and Jean Luc had just taken their seats. Then he fetched the little containers by the pot that carried little packets of cream and sugar and he brought those over as well. Remy caught his hand and gave it a quick squeeze. “ _Merci_ , Spencer.”

“Of course.” Spencer said. He smiled briefly before turning around to go get his own coffee. As he went, he heard Remy say “So, Papa, what kind of threat we looking at here? Y’ got any idea what’s coming fo’ us aside from Belle?”

Spencer flinched only slightly at those words. He quickly pushed it down so that his face was composed before he turned back around. He made his way back over towards the table. Remy caught a chair with his foot and tugged it out and over so that it was right beside him. Spencer sank down into it and leaned in a little towards Remy even as he watched Jean Luc across the table. The man was watching them with curious eyes, yet his tone was all business when he spoke. “I don’t know much yet. I still got a few calls out to people. De ones I do know of are all from different Guild houses. It aint just Assassins dat want y’ two, it’s t’ieves, too. Word is dat Demetri—from de Chicago house?—is planning on sending someone, _mais_ it’s supposed to be just to talk. Dere’s word dat Lil in London is planning on coming out herself, an she’s not de type to come up nice and proper an ask questions. She’d take y’ back home where she could talk to y’ dere, outside our reach. Dere’s quite a few Houses dat’re going to be sending people out to pick y’ two up and bring y’ back to dem.”

“But why?” Spencer asked. He looked over at Remy and then back at Jean Luc. “This is the part I truly don’t understand. Why do they want us? Why are they all so eager to come to us?”

“Y’r de first bonded pair in over t’ree hundred years, boys. Dere’s legends about dis. About de bonded pair and de return of de Healers.” Jean Luc said. He wrapped his hands around his mug and leaned his arms on the table, his eyes pinning the boys in place. “Did y’ ever stop to t’ink about how few empaths dere are in de world? Telepaths are a dime a dozen, and other powers are repeated here and dere, just in different ways. Energy powers, animal powers, dey all boil down to de same t’ing even if dey’re in different variations. But how many empaths do y’ know? How many have y’ heard of?”

He’d never actually stopped to think about that. How many mutants did he know of that had powers that were empathic in nature? There was his empathy, of course, and Remy’s charm, which was a minor empathy. There were powers that he could think of that might be empathic based, but a true empathy like his?

Jean Luc nodded as if he could hear what they were thinking. “Empathy has almost died out. Y’ see it here and dere. A base for some powers, or a small sidebar to others. But not’ing like what it should be. Like what it _could_ be.”

“And dey t’ink dat us bonding means dat, what, it’s gonna start coming back?” Remy asked.

“ _Oui_. Dey t’ink dere’s a chance y’ two bonding will act like a catalyst to bringing back empathy and, with dat, bringing back de Healers. Dey’re de same ones dat believe de story I told y’ dat bonding like y’rs was how de Guild leaders were chosen.”

A little piece of the puzzle clicked into place in Spencer's mind. He sat back in his chair, letting the new information wash over him, fitting it into place with everything else. “They think that, if it is true and we are these special leaders they’ve heard of, taking us will allow them to control the Guild. Control the leaders and you’d control the whole group.” It made sense in a twisted sort of way. But Spencer's mind was racing along now, running down the path this set him on, seeing all the little twists and turns in it. More questions popped up, as well as more answers.

Without even realizing it, he fell into one of his bad habits, one that had frequently amused the team—he talked out loud as he thought. “Why would they want to control a group of healers?” He murmured, furrowing his brows and looks down at his coffee. “Things like this, they’re all about power, so what would be gained from controlling people whose only goal is to heal? Money? They could charge people for use of a healer. With the diseases in the world today, it could be a lucrative business.” His fingers tapped along the edge of his mug. Money was a good motivator. People would do just about anything for money. But there had to be more to this. Power. Big moves like this, they were about power. Money was enough of a reason to send minions out to do your dirty work. From the sounds of it, there were one or two Houses that were sending their leaders out. They wouldn’t do that for just money. “Power. It all boils down to power. What would be powerful about owning a group of healers and their partners?” It hit him and Spencer's eyes went wide. They lifted, locking on to Remy, who had been watching him this entire time and feeling him thinking. “Jesus, Remy. Oh, man.” Spencer felt like he’d been sucker punched. He felt like he was going to be sick.

Remy took the mug from his hands and Spencer barely felt it. However, he did feel it as Remy’s hands closed over his, clenching down tightly on them. “What is it, Spencer? What’ve y’ figured out?”

“Think about it, Remy.” Spencer spoke past lips that had gone slightly numb. Shock had him frozen there in his chair, unable to even look away from Remy’s eyes. “Whatever house captures us has their own personal pet Healer. One that is supposedly going to bring back other empaths and healers who would then be tied to the place their ‘leader’ is tied to. They’d have a whole Guild of people who can heal.”

“ _Oui_ , cher, we figured dat out.”

“No, no, you’re not getting it.” How could they not see it? Spencer could see it and the idea horrified him. What little coffee he’d drank was threatening to come up as all the implications of this sank in. “I said this is about power. Whoever gets us gains a hell of a lot of power here. Think about it tactically for a moment. If it was you and you had the only empathic healer in your control, if you had a whole Guild of people who could heal, all yours to control and command, what would you do? What play would you make?”

Spencer both saw and felt as it registered with Remy what he was trying to say here. Shock hit first. It was Jean Luc who voiced what they were all thinking, though. “War.” He said, stunned. “Dey’d start a war.”

“Exactly.” Spencer whispered. He didn’t look away from Remy’s eyes, though his words were addressed to both LeBeau men. “What are a few casualties or injuries when you’ve got someone right there that can heal someone almost back to new in no time? And take it further. Imagine how interrogations would go. How long would you be able to hold on to your secrets when you know that you won’t die from what they do? That, no matter how badly they hurt you, they can just send someone in to heal you up so they can start all over again?” The thought of that almost broke Spencer's control. He bent over, trying to draw his hands in to press against his churning stomach. Remy released his hands but immediately caught his shoulders and pulled him in so that Spencer's forehead was resting against Remy’s shoulder. Spencer gratefully did so, needing the contact right now. “Oh, God, Remy.”

One of Remy’s hands reached around to rub Spencer's back and the other one went to its customary place in Spencer's hair. The shock that Remy had been feeling before was now being replaced with a wave of protectiveness and possessiveness so much stronger than anything Spencer had felt from him before. In contrast, his voice was low and gentle, a soothing sound near Spencer's ear. “Shh, Penny. I won’t let no take y’ like dat. I won’t let dem use y’ dat way so don’t y’ t’ink about it. Focus here on me. It’s gonna be okay. I got y’ here. Relax, cher. I got y’.”

Spencer stayed there for a few steadying breaths until he was once more sure that he wasn’t going to throw up all over Remy’s lap. Even after he was sure, he took a few more breaths just to give himself time to find a little more control. He let the warmth of the Protector’s emotions chase away the fear and chill inside. Now was not the time to panic. Panic would do nothing. He’d already had one big flip out today; another one was the last thing he needed. Spencer drew in one more deep breath and then made himself sit up and look at Remy. The glow to those beautiful eyes helped settle him just a little more. When he spoke, his voice was much calmer. “We need to get started on doing our information gathering, Remy. It’s more important than ever. You need to go call the house and let them know what’s going on, just in case anyone comes there, and to let them know we won’t be there for a while.”

He felt surprise and a bit of annoyance off to the side and instinctively turned to look. He found Jean Luc watching him with an unreadable expression. The emotions cut off when the man pulled his shields up tight as if realizing that Spencer could feel him. “And what is it dat y’r going to be doing?” The older man asked.

“I’m going to speak to _my_ team.” Spencer told him.

One elegant eyebrow arched. “Y’r going to involve de Feds in dis? In Guild business?”

“Aw, lay off him, Papa.” Remy said.

Spencer took a breath to settle down the small spike of temper. “No, sir. I’m going to involve my _friends_ in _my_ business.” And let him make of that what he would. Spencer brushed it all off and brought his attention back to Remy. “Why don’t you go ahead and go make your call and get in a smoke outside? I haven’t seen you have one all day and I’m sure you’re probably dying to walk the perimeter.”

Humor danced in Remy’s eyes. “Y’ just don’t wanna be near when Scotty starts yelling.”

“I knew you were a smart one.” Spencer teased him. The humor felt a little forced and his insides still seemed to be churning, but he was damned if he was going to let it keep him down. Especially with Jean Luc looking on. He would not break down in front of the man again.

It felt good to listen to Remy’s laughter when they both rose from their chairs. Because he was prepared for it, Spencer didn’t startle when Remy caught him and yanked him in for a hug. He wrapped his arms around the man and burrowed in against him for a moment and just let Remy enfold him completely. The Protector was still going strong in Remy and Spencer knew that the man’s instincts were going to be demanding that he keep Spencer in sight at all times, keep him safe, and yet they’d also be demanding he make sure the area was as secure as possible. This part of Remy worked solely on protecting and caring for his bondmate and that definitely meant his safety. It was part of why he’d suggested that Remy go have a smoke and walk the perimeter. It would help set him just a little more at ease. Spencer knew that it had sounded like an order, something that he wouldn’t typically do. But he also knew that this part of Remy needed a little firm direction sometimes and needed to see Spencer being steady and capable if he was going to be comfortable leaving him even for a moment.

Remy’s arms tightened around Spencer. “Y’ll stay here while I’m gone?”

“Yes.” Spencer agreed easily. “I won’t leave the house.” He’d known this was coming, too, and didn’t hesitate to help reassure his bondmate.

“Don’t go upstairs yet. Not till I clear it.” Remy said sharply.

“Okay.”

“An keep de curtains closed.”

“Okay.”

“An stay wit’ Papa.”

That one had Spencer hesitating for just a moment. “Okay.” He finally agreed. “Unless I have to go to the bathroom. I don’t want company in there.”

There was a slight pause and then a sigh. “ _D’accord._ ”

Spencer resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He gave Remy one last squeeze and then reluctantly pulled back. “Go on, go take care of things. I’ll be here when you get back.”

“I’m holding y’ to dat.”

He watched Remy go and gave a small shake of his head. Even knowing it was the instincts in him, this protective part he couldn’t really control, it was still crazy sometimes to watch it. It was lucky that he felt what Remy felt and knew the motivation and emotion behind all of it. If he didn’t have that, he might not have been as understanding or as tolerant. But knowing the emotion there, feeling it, made him more than just tolerant. He found himself enjoying it a bit, deep down inside where he’d never admit it to anyone. A part of him liked having someone so dead set on taking care of him. It was…nice.

Spencer brushed his hair back from his face and tried not to rub at his throbbing temples. There as a headache of mammoth proportions brewing in there. _I need to meditate before this headache gets any bigger_. Or before anything else went wrong. He was all out of sorts and he knew it. There were danger signs flashing brightly for him. The headache, the tiredness, the mood swings from one extreme to the other. All those were signs that he’d stressed his powers. Meditation usually helped that. There just wasn’t time right now.

First and foremost, Spencer pulled out his cell phone and sent a quick text out, wanting to make sure the person he needed was free and wasn’t working. Then, while he was waiting, he picked up his coffee cup and brought his attention back to the other person in the room. Being alone with Jean Luc was enough to make him nervous. To try and combat that, he focused the important things. “Do you think you would be able to write out a list for me of all the people you know that are coming for us as well as where they’re coming from?” He asked.

To his surprise, Jean Luc shook his head. “I can give y’ some names, but I cannot provide y’ with all de information y’r looking fo’. I’m bound by certain Guild rules here. Dere’s only so much I can do.”

Great. Just great. This was one thing that he could really do without having to deal with. Spencer _loathed_ politics. To hide his annoyance, he turned and moved over towards the coffee pot under the pretenses of refilling his mug. Years of practice kept his voice neutral. “I understand that you’re working underneath certain constraints here, sir. I wouldn’t be asking if it wasn’t important. I’m only trying to look out for Remy and do what’s best here. To keep him safe, to keep us safe, I need to understand what’s coming our way. That’s best done by understanding the people coming.”

“It’s not dat I don’t see de importance of it.” Jean Luc said slowly. “It’s just…de contacts y’d use, de people y’d speak with to find out y’r information, dey’re de type of people I can’t afford to bring down on dese others. If I bring some of dese people under de notice of the Bureau, it won’t be just dem dat suffers. De Guild would suffer too. I have to do what’s best fo’ everyone here, no matter how hard it is.”

Spencer could see the logic in what he said. He didn’t like it, but he could see the logic. Pouring his coffee, he tried to think of a way around this. A way to make this work. They needed the information; there was no denying that. “What if you made the list, but gave it to Remy?” He finally asked. Putting the pot back, he turned his head to look over at Jean Luc. “I can understand why you don’t want my friends looking in to these people and I can respect that. But we need to know what we’re up against to be prepared. So, what if you make the list and Remy gathers information through his contacts? That wouldn’t bring any legal attention to the Guild. I’ll give you my word that I won’t give any name on that list to anyone at the Bureau.”

“Y’d be willing to do dat?”

“Yes.” Shrugging, Spencer carried his mug back to the table. He snagged a few packets of sugar while he sat down and proceeded to add them to his coffee. As he stirred them in, he looked up through his bangs and found Jean Luc watching him with the strangest expression on his face. His shields were still up strong so there was no way for Spencer to read his emotions; he was forced to rely on reading body language. What he saw told him the man was surprised by something. Yet all he was doing was staring. It had Spencer shifting uncomfortably in his seat. He didn’t like being stared at. “What?” He finally asked.

“Y’ really care fo’ him, don’t y’?”

“Of course I do. We’re bonded together. How could I not care for him?”

The older man shook his head. “I don’t mean just wit’ de bond. I’m talking about Remy as a person. Y’ really care fo’ him.”

Spencer saw no reason to deny it. “Yes.” He paused and bit his bottom lip. _Better to just get this out of the way. This is Remy’s father, I need things as peaceful as possible between us._ “What you saw earlier, between Remy and I…I know things might not have looked, well, all that great. That wasn’t one of my finest moments and I’m not exactly proud of it. I don’t usually, I mean, I’m not normally like that. I don’t really get angry that way.” He looked back down at his mug, not quite comfortable with this. He felt Remy start to respond to the change in his emotions and he sent him reassurance to let him know that everything was okay. That wouldn’t hold him for long, though. Not with the Protector out so strongly. Knowing that his time was now limited, Spencer looked back up and met Jean Luc’s eyes. “I know you don’t exactly have the best impression of me and I know that, right now, you might not even like me very much, but please, believe me when I say that I care a great deal for your son. There is no one aside from my mother who is more important to me than him.”

“It’s not dat I don’t like y’.” Jean Luc told him. He sat back in his chair and Spencer could see the man was trying to choose his words carefully. He wasn’t brushing Spencer's words off. He was giving them thought and carefully forming his response. After a short pause, he finally said, “Y’ seem like a nice enough person. And I know dat, no matter what I feel, y’ and Remy are bonded together and not’ing I do will change dat. It’s just…I’m sure y’ can appreciate dat, as his father, I’m just trying to look out fo’ my boy. Remy hasn’t had de easiest life and I just want to see him happy.” Jean Luc smiled charmingly and spread his hands out on either side. “I’m sure if y’r Papa was here, he’d be doing de same t’ing, _non_?”

Spencer scoffed before he could stop himself. “If my father were here, he’d be looking for the quickest way to get out. It’s what he’s best at.” He regretted the sarcastic words as soon as they were out of his mouth. To try and quickly gloss past it, he tried for a small smile that was meant to be reassuring and he waved a hand in a gesture meant to wipe away his other words. “I’m sorry, that was uncalled for. I do understand what you’re doing here, sir, and I can respect it. Remy went through the same thing with Morgan when they met.”

Laughter echoed in the room as Remy came strolling in. Spencer had felt him coming and had heard the door open just moments before. Remy had lasted longer than Spencer had thought; it didn’t surprise him that the man was back now. His protectiveness hadn’t faded a single bit while he was gone. If anything, it had grown stronger. But it eased now as he made his way over to Spencer. None of it showed on the outside, though. All that showed was the good humor on his face that he wanted to be seen. “Ahh, he must be quizzing y’ on y’r intentions.” He said teasingly as he strolled up to Spencer. The two exchanged a brief touch of hands and a smile. Then Remy looked over to Jean Luc, humor dancing in his eyes. “Be nice an leave de po’ boy alone, Papa.”

“Not on y’r life, child.” Jean Luc quipped.

Remy dropped down into the chair beside Spencer, kicking his feet up in a nearby one, and his arm went around the back of Spencer's chair. It looked so casual and relaxed and his smirk said he was in a teasing sort of mood. Under the surface he was watchful and alert. He had that feel to him that he got during those Danger Room training sessions that Spencer had come to recognize as Remy scanning around them for a threat. Even if he didn’t look like he was watching, he was. Through all of this was twined the familiar twist of emotions that was the Protector. There was a threat to his Healer and that instinctive part of Remy was out in full force. It was why he was up against Spencer's side, yet still separate enough that he could launch to his feet in an instant to defend if need be, and why he was seated between Spencer ant the hallway towards the rest of the house. Anyone or anything that came in would have to go through Remy first.

Whatever Remy said next came out in rapid fire French. It was too fast for Spencer to catch and try to translate, but Jean Luc must’ve understood because he gave a delighted laugh. Whatever had been said must’ve set him at ease. His body relaxed and his smile was a little more honest.

It wasn’t worth asking what had been said. If Remy had wanted him to know, he would’ve said it in English or he would’ve translated. Whatever it was, it was private between the two men and he could respect that. So he just glossed past it and focused instead on something else. “How’d the phone call go?” He asked Remy.

Amusement filled Spencer at the scowl that twisted Remy’s face. The man reached up and rubbed at his ear. “Dat man’s got a set of lungs on him, dat’s fo’ damn sure.”

“He’s not too happy with us, I take it.” Spencer said wryly.

Remy snorted and his scowl took on a slightly pouting edge to it. “Oh, no, he aint mad at _y’_. He’s convinced y’r jus’, like, along fo’ de ride or somet’ing. No, he got mad at _Remy_.”

“What?” That had Spencer sitting up a little straighter. He turned more towards Remy to better look at him. Scott was mad at Remy for this? But, why? It wasn’t his fault! Spencer's own protective side pushed forward. “Why is he mad at you? You haven’t done anything wrong. If he wants to be mad at anyone, maybe he should be mad at the Professor for not being more discreet in his inquiries.”

“Dat’s exactly what I said.” Smiling, Remy patted Spencer's leg and sent him warm and soothing emotions. “Don’t worry, I talked him round. He understands why we aint coming dere, even if he don’t like it. We settled on a compromise.”

“Y’ compromised?” Jean Luc asked teasingly. “I didn’t know y’ knew de meaning of de word. What was y’r compromise?”

A corner of Remy’s mouth twitched like he was fighting a smile. His mirth flooded the bond. “We don’t have to come dere, _mais_ he’s gonna send someone to help out an keep an eye on us.” The mirth grew a little more and a small smile finally broke free. “He’s sending de Wolverine to play bodyguard.”

Laughter bubbled up in Spencer. He relaxed back into his chair again and gave in to a small chuckle. “That was your concession? Logan as a bodyguard?”

“ _Oui_.” Remy said smugly.

“So, who suggested it?”

“He did.”

Spencer's chuckles turned to full blown laughter. Remy, seeing that Jean Luc wasn’t quite understanding, explained “Logan would’ve come after us whether we liked it or not and we already knew dat. We’d planned on jus’ askin’ him to come out to save him de trouble of hunting us down. Scotty basically demanded somet’ing we was gonna do anyways.” He grinned broadly as his father started to laugh right along with Spencer. Once all the laughter had died down, Remy continued on with his explanation. “Logan said he’d be here in about an hour, hour an a half tops. He’s gonna make a few calls of his own, see what he can see. He’s knows more folks dan some people realize. An he’s gonna bring us some of our t’ings, too.”

“Oh, wonderful.” Spencer breathed out a sigh of relief. Fresh clothes would be great.

“Y’ hear anyt’ing from y’r side yet?” Remy asked Spencer.

The young genius shook his head no. His phone had stayed silent in his pocket this whole time. “I sent a text to Garcia, but I haven’t gotten a reply. If she can’t even text back then it’s a pretty safe bet that the team is rather busy at the moment. She’ll call once they have a free moment.”

“M’kay.” The look on Remy’s face softened just slightly. He lifted one hand and used it to tuck some of Spencer's hair behind his ear. “Why don’t I watch y’r phone fo’ y’ fo’ a bit and y’ can go set up wit’ some meditation? Y’r shields feel like y’ need it.”

That was true. This had been a hell of a long day already with quite a few emotional upheavals and his shields were suffering for it. Meditation did sound like a good plan. But Spencer found himself hesitant to say yes. He found the idea of leaving being away from Remy, even just a room away, was a little too much for him right now. Everything they’d heard today was still playing in Spencer's head and it all made him want to cling tightly to his partner and never let him go. “No, no. It’s okay. I’m fine.” He lied.

He should’ve known better than to lie. Remy knew better; he could feel just how much of a lie it was. He didn’t call Spencer out on it outright, though. He just looked at Spencer with understanding and lowered his voice even more, letting it drop down to a soft, reassuring cadence. “I wasn’t planning on leaving y’, Penny. We can all go in de living room and I’ll stay in dere wit’ y’, I promise. I’ll stand guard over y’. I aint up fo’ letting y’ out of m’ sight fo’ more dan a minute or so. We can just go on in de living room an Papa an I can visit while y’ meditate, if we won’t bug y’. How’s dat sound?”

Relief coursed through Spencer. Go figure that Remy would be feeling the same way that he was. Spencer should’ve known that the man wouldn’t be letting him out of his sight. “That sounds perfect. You guys won’t bother me at all once I’m under.”

“Good. Y’ go on and get settled in dere while we refill our coffee. I won’t be more dan a minute behind y’.” Remy leaned in and gave him a quick kiss before rising up from his chair.

CXCX

Minutes later, the three men were settled into the living room. Jean Luc had a recliner while Remy was lying stretched out over the couch. Spencer was seated on the floor in front of the couch in full lotus position. He was a little jittery at first, his emotions skittering from here to their inside the bond, until Remy reached out and laid a firm hand on the back of his neck, providing Spencer with a steady anchor. It only took a few breaths for some of the tension to ease and for his breathing to start to settle out. Remy lay there and looked inside himself, monitoring Spencer both physically and emotionally through their bond, watching is at his partner slowly eased down into that peaceful state that came when he reached the first part of his meditation.

Once he was settled firmly in it, Remy drew back and opened his eyes. He found his father watching him with a small smile on his lips. Remy returned the smile easily. “He’s under enough we won’t disturb him now.” At least, so long as he kept his own emotions steady. He knew Spencer would react to changes in his emotions. It wasn’t that hard, though. All he had to do was let some of Spencer's meditative peace slip into him and he was relaxing a little as well.

Jean Luc looked down at him and cocked his head. “He looks like he goes in deep. Can he even hear us?”

“Not dat I’ve ever noticed. His empathy opens up, t’ough, so he’ll feel us. An he’ll feel me, of course. He’ll pull up fast enough if he feels somet’ing wrong.”

“What does he meditate for? I get the feeling that he does this frequently.”

Remy nodded his head and adjusted a little better on the couch. One arm was behind his head and he was slightly propped up on the armrest, his other hand stayed at Spencer's neck, and his legs stretched out along the rest of the couch. This was as close to relaxing as he would come. Still alert and ready to move, his body at least was resting a little. It was a good way to rest and be comfortable while standing guard over Spencer and while enjoying conversation with his Papa. “He does. De meditation, it helps him process out de emotions he picks up and settle down his own. Plus, it lets him fix anyt’ing wrong wit’ his shields. I t’ink he t’inks better in dere, too. He’s usually got some t’ings figured out by de time he comes out. Mostly, I t’ink it’s just his way of being able to stay sane underneath everyt’ing he has to feel all de time.”

Well used to reading his father’s face, Remy could see sympathy in the slight tightening around Jean Luc’s eyes, and a hint of sorrow touched his gaze. “He’s an extraordinary man with quite a burden placed on him.”

“Y’ didn’t seem so sure of dat earlier.” Remy’s tone held a note to it that made his words more than just playful. He knew that Spencer had thought Remy hadn’t picked up on the tension between the two men, but Remy wasn’t an idiot. He knew Jean Luc and he knew spencer. He’d seen the tension there and he’d caught enough to figure out what was going on.

To his surprise, a look of slight embarrassment touched Jean Luc’s features. “I was a little hard on him, I know.” He admitted, surprising Remy even more. “Part of it was a Papa worrying fo’ his boy. A boy dat he’s tired of seeing people hurt.”

“Spencer aint gonna hurt me, Papa. He cares, more dan anyone else I’ve ever been wit’.”

“He hurt y’ dis morning.” Jean Luc pointed out.

A gusty sigh slid from Remy. “I told y’, he didn’t mean it like dat. Once he realized what was going on, he fixed it. He aint de type to hurt people, Papa. It just aint in him. When ot’er people hurt, he hurts, even if it aint his fault.”

That drew a small grimace from Jean Luc. He looked down at Spencer and his expression softened a little once more. “ _Je sais, je sais_. I can see dat about him. He’s got a good heart in dere. A damaged one, dere’s no denying dat, but a good one. He’ll be good fo’ y’, petit.”

“I t’ink so.” Remy agreed. He looked at the side view he had of Spencer's face, admiring the look of it. The soft brush of lashes over high cheekbones. The slender look that he was still determined he would fill out, eventually. He just had to keep feeding him. Eventually he’d put some weight on. Remy watched him and his lips curved up in a smile. He didn’t notice his father watching him. Jean Luc could see Remy’s face relax, see the warmth that filled those devil eyes, and he knew that his son was well and truly caught. He’d yet to hear the couple say the words but the love between them was obvious to anyone with eyes. Jean Luc smiled at the pair and said a silent prayer and blessing for them both.

CXCX

A little over an hour passed by before something disturbed their little haven. Remy and Jean Luc had been exchanging small stories, bits of tales about friends they knew, or people back home, or just little things that had been going on in their lives. They’d been catching up, essentially. Remy had just finished telling his father about his training sessions with Spencer and how well his partner was improving when Spencer's emotions suddenly shifted just second before the man’s said “Logan’s here.” Warm brown eyes opened, turning to the window and the nto Remy. There was more peace in them than had been there earlier, as well as a tiny spark of humor. “I can feel him coming up the road; I recognize his signature. He’s worried and annoyed and a bit grumpy.”

“So, basically, he’s hi’self.” Remy said dryly.

Laughter danced in Spencer's eyes. “Basically. Be nice and let him in, would you? He should be just pulling up right about now, if I’m guessing right. I don’t feel anyone else out there but the same guards as before, either. I don’t think he was followed. Not unless they know how to shield like Jean Luc.”

Remy sat up, stealing a quick kiss along the way, and he flowed easily to his feet. “Don’t no one know how to shield like Papa. He don’t even know how he does it.” He strolled over to the door and pulled it open wide, grinning at the sight of his friend climbing out of an old pickup truck. At the sight of the white bags in Logan’s hands, Remy let out a laugh. “Ah, Spencer, it looks like Logan brought y’ a present.”

Grabbing a duffle bag from the back of the cap, Logan slung it over his shoulder and elbowed the door shut. He strolled up towards Remy with his customary glare on his face. “What the hell kind of shit you land yourself in now, Gumbo? Can’t you stay outta trouble? I let ya leave the house for one night and suddenly I find out there’s a shit ton of people out to kill you.”

Ah, no one greeted his friends quite like Logan did. Remy laughed and stepped back, gesturing the man who was his best friend into the house. “Let me out, eh? Since when did y’ become dis Cajun’s keeper, _mon ami_?” He teased.

Logan snorted and bumped him as he passed him. “Someone has to. You get into enough shit for ten people.”

“Hey! It aint Remy’s fault!” Remy exclaimed, putting a hand over his heart. He scanned the street before shutting the door behind them. With one hand he gestured Logan to where the living room was. “Dis one’s all on de Professor and his inability to ask questions discreetly.”

“Yeah, well, who’s the idiot who let someone else ask around for him instead of doing it himself?” Logan shot back. He grinned as his barb hit home. Taking advantage of a quiet Cajun, he went into the living room where Spencer and Jean Luc were still waiting. With his usual manners, Logan tossed one bag right at Spencer, snickering as the genius scrambled to keep it from spilling. “There, Stretch. Eat up.” The other white bags were tossed onto the coffee table and the duffle bag was dumped by the couch.  He gave Jean Luc a polite nod and a respectful “Mr. LeBeau,” casual with him from having met the man once before. Then he went over to the love seat and dropped himself down onto it, ignoring the low groan the furniture gave underneath his bulk.

Remy watched it all and gave an amused shake of his head. That was Logan for you. Rough, gruff, and caring, all rolled into one thirty second time span. His mannerisms and words were the rough and gruff part, and the food was the caring. Remy knew that Logan had most likely only stopped off for the food for Spencer's sake. He, like Remy, was on a mission to fatten their slender friend up. They both thought him too skinny. Logan was one of the only ones to make sure that Spencer got his junk too, as was obvious by the loaded burgers that Spence was just pulling out of his bag.

The way that Spencer was looking at the food had everyone laughing. Remy shook his head and moved to sit back on the couch once more, sitting up this time instead of laying down. He bumped his knee against Spencer's shoulder while leaning forward to dig in the bag on the coffee table. “De way y’ look at dat t’ing is indecent, Penny. It’s just a burger.” He teased. With a hand gesture and a look, Remy let Jean Luc know to help himself to the food. He grabbed his own burger and sat back.

Spencer didn’t even look up at Remy as he unwrapped his burger. “It’s not _just_ a burger. I haven’t eaten since last night, Remy LeBeau. Right now this food is pure ambrosia.”

Shaking his head, Logan watched Spencer with fond amusement. “You and your junk, Stretch.”

“Hey, this isn’t junk!” Spencer protested. He took a bite and his expression was almost orgasmic. Everyone watched as he ate that first bite like it was the best food he’d ever had. When he finished that bite, he smiled over at Logan. “I’ll have you know I lived off this stuff for years and years.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Mm hm. When I was little, Mom cooked more, but by the time I was about eight it wasn’t really safe for her to be cooking. Dad did a lot of it when he was home. When he wasn’t, well…I became a pro at scavenging, or grabbing takeout. Plus, honestly, what nine year old isn’t going to pick up a box of Pop Tarts for breakfast when he shops, or snag a quick dinner from the burger joint down the road? Come on now.” He shrugged one shoulder and flashed a smile before turning his attention back to his food. Since he was still on the floor below Remy, he didn’t notice the looks his words earned him, and he had his shields up enough that he felt no one but Remy at the moment, which meant he didn’t feel the surprise or the pity from the other two at hearing that he’d been doing the grocery shopping at nine years old.

Remy shot the two a look to warn them to keep quiet. He could see the looks on their faces and he knew how Spencer would react if he looked up and saw them. To distract everyone, he reached down and gave Spencer's shoulder a quick squeeze “I hate to break it to y’, cher, _mais_ y’ aint nine no more. Don’t y’ t’ink it might be time to eat grown up food?”

“There’s no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.” Spencer quoted. It was one of his favorite quotes.

“Yeah, yeah, be childish some other time.” Logan interrupted with a growl. “Right now, I wanna know what the hell’s going on. Someone catch me up, cause Scooter didn’t have shit to tell me.”

“It aint a short story.” Remy warned him.

“Then start talking, Gumbo.”

So, they did. The two went back and forth, taking turns to tell the story as they ate, giving Logan everything they’d learned, everything they knew. The whole telling took almost an hour. By the time they were done, the food was gone. The house fell quiet as Logan processed what they’d just told him. They gave him a bit of quiet to go over it all in his head. While he did, Remy gathered up their garbage, taking it into the kitchen and throwing it away. It was when he came back and settled in by Spencer again that Logan finally spoke.

“So let me see if I’ve got all this.” Logan said. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, and ticked off the points on his fingers as he went. “You two found out your some mystical Healer/Guardian pair out of the damn legends, fated to rule over a Healer Guild that died out centuries ago but that’s coming back to life now because you two went and did your weird bonding shit.”

“Allegedly.” Spencer couldn’t help but add in.

A glare from Logan silenced him. Spencer sank back into his seat and snapped his mouth shut. Logan nodded and held up another finger, moving on to the next point. “People who believe this _alleged_ story are now trying to hunt you two down and either kill or capture ya so they can stop this from happening or find some way to control it. Potentially to start a huge ass fucking war or stage some hostile takeover or some shit like that. Then you’ve got this mystery main house that you’ve got to find, which is supposed to have a special library full of all the knowledge these Healers had, and you’ve got to find it, the two of you. Before anyone else does, I’d guess, or else bad shit could happen I’d bet, cause I don’t even wanna know what the hell someone like Sinister would do with a library full of Healer knowledge like that. Did I get it all?”

“Dat’s de gist of it.” Remy said agreeably.

“Shit.” Shaking his head, Logan glared at them like they’d somehow planned this just to make his life miserable. “Aint it ever easy with you two? This is like some shit from a fairytale or something.” He let out a sigh and flopped back in his seat. From one pocket he pulled out a cigar and went through the process of getting it lit. Once the end was lit and he had it going nicely, he looked up and fixed them with sharp blue eyes. “So, when do we leave?”

A stunned silence fell over the room. Spencer and Remy shared a look and then turned together to look back at Logan. “What?” Spencer asked.

Logan drew off his cigar and blew smoke up at the ceiling. “Well you didn’t think I’d just sit back and let ya go on your own, now did ya?”

“Logan, cher…”

“Don’t even try it, Rem.” Logan cut him off. “You’re gonna need all the friends you can get at your back here. The hell if I’m letting you two go off on your own and deal with all this shit without someone watching your back for ya. You’re both stuck with me, like it or not.”

“Thank you.” Spencer said softly, his low voice drawing Logan’s attention and softening the feral man’s gaze. He looked at Logan and Remy felt their shields shift, knew that Spencer was sending emotion to the other man. Respect and gratitude along with the feelings of friendship. He saw Logan smile down at the genius and marveled a little at how much affection and loyalty Spencer seemed to inspire in people. He just brought out that kind side in people. Serious, gruff Logan actually turned kind of soft around this kid, treating him like he was one of his pups to look out for, care for. Like Spencer wasn’t just his friend, but was his kid or something. Remy kept that observation to himself. He was sure Spencer didn’t notice it; from what he knew of his bondmate’s childhood, he had a feeling Spencer wouldn’t recognize fatherly affection if it bashed him over the head.

Logan’s softer side only showed for just a moment. Then it was gone and he was shrugging one shoulder and brushing off the seriousness of it all. “So, like I said, when we leaving?”

“We’re not sure yet.” Remy told him. “We aint exactly made plans. We been too busy gathering intel to really start to plan t’ings out.”

“Good plan.” Logan told them both. “It aint all got to be figured out today. An you two look beat, anyways.”

“It’s been a long day.” Spencer said by way of explanation.

“Sounds like it’s been enough for one day. We got some information, we got more coming in, and you two look like five miles of bad road. Why don’t you go on and stretch out? Shut it down for a while. I’ll keep watch.”

With no one else would they have trusted so much to actually agree to that and mean it. But they knew that they could afford to relax here tonight with Logan standing guard for them. He’d let them know if anything was coming. Spencer smiled and sent a wave of gratitude to his friend as he rose to his feet. “Thanks, Logan.”

CXCX

As they walked up the stairs, Spencer could feel just how tired Remy was. It was in every inch of him. The man had had so much thrown at him today and he’d been essentially running on high alert since then, worried every second about keeping himself and his bondmate safe, trying to think and plan and anticipate everything. No one could run like that constantly. Spencer had no doubt that Remy was up to the task, but after a night of rest. After he had a chance to recover from everything that had happened today. Both men were worn down, tired, and their bond was still raw from the fight this morning. They needed to decompress and heal a little together.

He let Remy lead the way to the bedroom and even waited once inside so that the man could clear the room and make it as secure as possible. Windows were checked and locked, the closet was checked, even under the bed was checked. Spencer just waited patiently out of the way by the door until Remy had gone over every inch of the room and found it to his liking. Only then did the Cajun come back over towards him and hold out a hand. “C’mon, cher, let’s get y’ in bed.”

“That sounds perfect.” Spencer agreed.

It became clear when they got by the bed that Remy was going to try and sleep in his clothes. Logistically, Spencer understood why. Right now he just didn’t care. He was trusting their safety over to Logan. Let Logan make sure they were safe. Spencer had a much more important job to do. He caught Remy by the lapels of his jacket and stopped him before he could climb onto the bed. The element of surprise allowed him to get Remy’s coat off his shoulders before the other man managed to ask “What’re y’ doing, Spencer?”

“You are not sleeping in your clothes and armor tonight.” Spencer told him simply. He got the jacket off of Remy and draped it over a nearby chair. Then he turned back around and reached for Remy’s shirt. He cut off any protests before they could for. “Logan is keeping watch for us downstairs and I’m more than willing to keep enough weapons and cards close to the bed to allow you to feel secure. But you are not climbing into that bed fully dressed. This is coming off; all of it.”

His straightforward way of saying it seemed to have stunned the other man. He was watching Spencer, not even lifting a hand to help him, but not trying to stop him anymore, either. “Well now, is someone in de mood?”

“Hush.” Spencer murmured. He finished stripping Remy, even squatting down to help him step out of his shoes, socks, and finally his pants. Then he rose and gestured for Remy to climb into bed. Surprisingly, Remy did so, no questions asked. Nodding to himself in satisfaction, Spencer briskly and efficiently stripped out of his own clothes, straight down to the skin. His usual nerves were nowhere in sight when he climbed into the bed and moved to straddle Remy’s abdomen.

Remy ran his hands over the outside of Spencer's thighs and managed to summon up a leer for him. “Now dis looks promising.”

“Hush, Remy.” Spencer murmured. He bent forward, hands going to Remy’s face to smooth back his hair. One long finger traced over the little furrow that had built between Remy’s eyebrows. “You’re so tense. So tired.”

The corner of Remy’s mouth quirked up a little in an attempt at a smile. “I’m okay, cher.”

Bending, Spencer pressed a light kiss against Remy’s forehead. “Hush, I said.” He straightened up again and looked down at Remy with so much apology in his expression that it left Remy silent. “I hurt you today.” Spencer told him, his fingers smoothing back Remy’s hair again. “I didn’t mean to, but it still happened. I felt it there at the end, just how much my emotions hurt you. How raw they left you inside. And I’ve watched you today and seen just how tired you are and how raw you still are inside.” He moved his hands over Remy’s forehead, tracing away the tension lines, smoothing them away as he went. He stopped at Remy’s temples and rubbed where he could feel the throbbing of a headache that had sat there most of the day. Remy groaned softly and his eyes fluttered shut.

Spencer worked his fingers there for a few minutes until he felt the headache start to fade away. He didn’t really notice the warmth to his fingers as his healing powers slid into his touch. All of his attention was focused on his partner and on smoothing away the damage he’d done. He traced over Remy’s eyebrows, down his nose, under his eyes and back towards his ears. With each touch, he smoothed away a little more pain. He worked carefully along Remy’s jawline where the muscles had tensed countless times while he’d been talking on the phone or dealing with people. Times where he’d almost bitten his tongue off to keep his temper in check.

“You work so hard to take care of me.” Spencer said. He brushed his thumb over Remy’s lips, smiling when the tip briefly dipped between them and was met with the flick of a tongue. Long lashes fluttered and a hint of red peeked out from underneath heavy lids. Spencer met the sensual look and smiled. He pulled his thumb, running that bit of moisture over Remy’s lips, and then he moved his fingers back along Remy’s jawline to his ears, dipping briefly towards the back of his head to trace the tension lines he felt. “I watch you and you work yourself so hard sometimes, Remy. You don’t even seem to realize all the things you do. You’ve been so good to me from the very first moment this all started.”

Remy seemed to have caught on to his mood because he didn’t say anything there, though Spencer could feel how he wanted to.

Bending once more, Spencer ghosted his lips over Remy’s, letting their mouths brush together in a whisper of a kiss. As he did, his fingers found the knots at the base of Remy’s skull and down his neck and he pressed over them, chasing away the pain. “Let me take care of you tonight, baby. Logan’s on guard out there and he’ll let us know if anything comes our way. I’ll be here too, watching. Let me be the one to take care of you tonight.” He pressed in and kissed Remy slow and deep.

When he pulled back, he could see on Remy’s face that he had what he wanted. He saw the surrender written there and it made him smile. He knew what a huge gift Remy was giving to him here; knew and treasured it. Remy was handing over control to Spencer and that was a gift that was meant to be treasured. Spencer would make sure he didn’t regret it. He kissed him once more in silent reward and then, with a little mental sigh of relief, he gave himself over to the pressing need inside of him that had been demanding for hours now that he take care of his Guardian. Spencer handed himself over to his instincts in a way he’d never allowed before. His healing ability, his empathy, they opened up wider than ever and then focused down solely on Remy. At the same time, their bond seemed to open with it and the two of them seemed to sink into it. The whole world outside of the bed mostly dropped away for them. Spencer had just enough presence of mind to keep a part of his empathy extended like a sort of shield that would alert him if anyone started to come close or any negative or threatening emotions started to happen. Otherwise, he was focused solely on Remy.

This touch wasn’t sexual in nature. It was a healing touch. Spencer's hands ran over every inch of Remy’s exposed skin, chasing away the tension, the pain. Knots that had formed here and there, old bruises left from training sessions, pain in muscles that had been tensed in preparation for trouble for so long that they were a steady ache. The healing in his hands chased it all away. And deeper than that, the healing flowed into their bond, soothing away the pain from their fight earlier. If Spencer closed his eyes he swore he could see it like a glowing, soothing green that flowed into their bond like liquid light, running through all the parts that connected them together and easing those raw places. He felt Remy gasp under him as it poured into him, into his mind, healing as it went.

Spencer opened his eyes and looked up at Remy’s face. He watched as the man relaxed in a way Spencer had never seen from him. From anyone, really. As Spencer moved further down, rubbing over Remy’s stomach and hips now, he watched as he relaxed more and more and he felt joy and pride at the sight of it. He had done this for him. He had eased him this way.

By the time that Spencer had reached Remy’s feet, the man was a puddle in the bed. Spencer ran his hands over Remy’s toes, the last little part of him to be touched, and he finally sat back on his heels to look at what he’d done. Remy was just lying there, limp as a rag doll, radiating such peace. Inside and outside he was completely relaxed. Spencer gave a happy little hum and climbed back up the bed. Remy made not a sound when Spencer stretched out over him. But when Spencer's face found the crook of his neck, Remy mustered up enough energy to turn his head and nuzzle at his hair. Spencer pressed a kiss against Remy’s neck. That was the only communication they had. Spencer draped himself over his bondmate and then, with a sigh of his own, he let go of everything else and let him sink down into their bond, let it surround him. This was all he needed. The rest of it could wait until morning. This, right here and right now, was perfect.

He was smiling as he slipped down into sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ends part one of this story, folks. I’m going to end the first book here and pick this up in the second book, Healers, which I’m going to get started on plotting out and I hope to start publishing it very, very soon. Keep your eye out for it! I thought it better to break it up like this so that this long, long story doesn’t get insanely long. Plus, it allows people who’ve lost interest in the story, or who don’t want to see it go further along this new route, to walk away if they want to, and any that are interested can keep coming and go to the next story and continue along the journey with the full understanding of the mystical, slightly supernatural side of things that lie ahead.


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